This Good-bye is for You, Ch 2
Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Major Crimes; James Duff, et al, has that lovely distinction.
A/N: When Sharon gets bad news, she decides to handle it alone leaving Andy hurt, angry and confused. Putting his detective skills to good use, he pieces together the long-distance clues she leaves him.
A/N2: The illness is secondary; primary is their love and the way it changes them for the better.
A/N3: Enjoy! Leave a review if y'all's feel so inclined; they are ever so lovely to read. #TodayIsLife
~~~~~PT~~~~~
Three weeks prior
Sharon sat in her car, tears dropping as quickly as water flows past a broken dam. She'd heard what her doctor had said. Her diagnosis, his recommended treatment, the best location, and that he'd help her tell Andy. Andy. She believed with all her heart he wouldn't be able to handle it. He'd lose himself trying to help her, trying to be there for her, and so she'd decided that he shouldn't know, that he couldn't know.
That day she'd gotten hurt, she'd seen the fear in his eyes and heard him whisper she couldn't go before him. When he'd asked her to promise him that she'd outlive him because she was stronger, because she'd be able to handle it better, she'd promised that she'd try; she would do her very best.
Sitting in her car after that doctor's visit, she vowed yet again, to herself only this time, she would try to outlive him. Failing that, she'd protect him because she was the stronger of the two. With a shake of her head, the decision was made and the plan of action decided before she put the car into drive and headed to work.
Needing an excuse for her tardiness, one that wouldn't be questioned by her team and most especially one that her fiancé would believe, she stopped by the café near PAB and ordered coffees for all of them.
Walking into the Murder Room, she placed the box on Lt Provenza's desk and announced she had paperwork due that day that she had to finish within the hour.
As she powered up her laptop, she peered out her window, catching Andy's gaze. With a slight wink and a small nod of her head, she went to the Department's home page and hit the link for forms, choosing the packet for retirement. Forty-five minutes later, the forms were completed and she had stamped rush on the top page. Hiding them in a folder, she walked through the Murder Room without looking at any of them and continued towards Asst Chief Taylor's office.
Without preamble, she handed him the folder, standing there for any questions or comments.
"Am I losing Flynn too?" he'd asked, sure that he was.
"No, Andy isn't retiring, Chief, I am. I'll be gone in three weeks at the latest. Lt Provenza can take over until you decide the position is his permanently or find someone else to run the division."
"Can you stay longer?" He sighed loudly. "Will you be able to train the new person if I decide Provenza is too damn old to leave in charge?"
Inhaling deeply, she kept her voice even despite the turmoil she felt inside. "No to both questions, Chief. I have something to take care of and I need to concentrate solely on that." Her hands grasped the chair she was holding onto even tighter. "I'd appreciate it if this was kept between us and whoever will be facilitating my departure. No one else needs to know until I decide to inform them."
"That sounds fair enough, Captain," he agreed. "What made you decide to retire so suddenly? Why so secret about your departure?" He thought about her refusal to stay on longer. "Are you staying in Los Angeles?"
"My pay is direct deposit so it really doesn't matter where I am located, Chief, and as I said I have something to tend to that will take a great deal of my energy."
He knew he shouldn't ask but they'd known each other a long time. Most of that time, they didn't get along but she was a damn fine officer and he hated to lose her. He quickly thought of ways for her to work part-time, hell he'd even accept per diem, anything but full blown retirement with three weeks notice, if she stayed that long.
"Sharon," he began softly, "is this health related?" Putting up his hands in surrender, he clarified before she was able to speak. "You're pale, you've lost some weight, you get tired quickly and you've taken a few hours sick leave for the first time since your kids were still living at home. You're sick, Captain, so why not just take leave? You've got enough of it to last you several months so why not use it? If you still think retirement is best when you're due to come back, then put in your paperwork."
"I need to retire, Chief, because -," she paused, caught her breath then continued, "I have to concentrate on myself and I won't be able to do that if I think I have a schedule to keep. Please rush the paperwork so I remain in compliance. Thank you for keeping this confidential." With that she left, slowly walking back to her office.
Her first call was to her insurance company for approval of the recommended treatment. She'd chosen a location different from the initial one her doctor suggested though he did ultimately agree with her decision. She verified all of the information her doctor had faxed the insurance company along with the potential start of treatment for her particular diagnosis. Her doctor had given a very specific start date, letting both her and the insurance representative know that intensive treatment was imperative and to begin no later than one month; really it was the sooner, the better but she had to wait for an opening at the clinic to become available.
Her next call was to Emily; she needed that apartment her friend was looking to sublet for a year. Telling her daughter she wouldn't need it that long, she offered to pay each month for the full year if that was the only way she could get it. Emily assured her that wouldn't be necessary; there were perks to being her mother. The question of why she needed the apartment hung in the air and when Emily finally asked, Sharon initially hemmed and hawed, finally saying that she'd tell her in her own time but now wasn't that time.
Her last call was to the clinic to again verify that she was on the waiting list. The person who answered her call assured her that she was and that she had, in fact, already been pushed up per her doctor's orders. If she could get there in two weeks, they'd set up her appointments for the entire schedule blocked out by her doctor and she'd start the following week. Her breath caught in her throat, her eyes stung and she found herself feeling rather unsteady even as she sat in her chair. Finally calming herself, she agreed to the earlier arrival time and requested an immediate call if she was pushed up even further.
Sitting back in her chair, she let her eyes close as she spun to face the window. Andy. She was making all of these plans without him. She'd be going through all of this without him. It was for him, she told herself, for his benefit.
~~~~~# # #~~~~~
Present day
As he walked into the Murder Room, Flynn knew he'd catch hell from Lt Provenza, his partner, best friend and now acting boss of the Major Crimes Division. He didn't realize how much hell he'd catch though until the older man started yelling at him as soon as he'd laid eyes on him.
"What the hell, Flynn? Did you even try to hit the guy back?"
"Of course I did. I'm not a damn idiot. He would've stopped punching me if I didn't keep it going."
"Ye Gods, you wanted this?!" Pointing to their boss' office, his face changing from pink to red, he announced, "Get in there and I mean get in there right now."
Shaking his head defiantly, "That's Sharon's office. I'm not going in there."
"Well I'm in charge for now and I will use it when I need to and by God I need to use it for you right now. Get in there!"
He walked slowly to the office, for several reasons: because it reminded him of Sharon and thinking of her only brought pain; because he had never seen his best friend as angry with him as he was right then; and because the physical pain he had so craved the night before was a bitch to him that day. He felt every day of his age, perhaps even every second of it as he moved.
Once inside, Provenza laid into him again. When he'd honestly admitted what happened, the older Lieutenant softened in both tone and expression. "You should've called me. I would've come anytime, you know that."
"I miss her and it hurts so damn much sometimes," he admitted with a wince. "I'm never gonna see her again and, for the life of me, I don't know why."
"You been checking the account every day?" the elder man asked hopefully.
"Yeah, she's definitely in New York based on where she's shopping but that doesn't mean she's staying there for good."
"Any checks clear?" His tone was leading though he knew he couldn't offer up any information.
"One just did this morning. The memo line said three months sublet. She's renting a place somewhere."
Trying to act innocent enough, as much as he could pull off, he asked, "Where'd she send it?"
"How the hell am I supposed to know? I see the image of the check, not the envelope."
"Who'd she send it to?" His scowl told his partner he thought he could be doing better detective work regarding his private life but he didn't express those thoughts aloud.
"I googled her; she lives in Westchester." He scratched the back of his neck and winced in pain again from the movement.
"So she's got a house in the suburbs and rents out her apartment in the city," he shrugged. "What else?"
"Sharon only shops at two or three stores. They're all within a few blocks of each other."
"So that's where she's living now." He was stating the obvious but it felt like he was doing more. It felt like he was going against his Captain's parting wishes when it came to her fiancé.
"Yeah, that's what I figured," he started to run his hand over his face but the bruised areas hurt like hell.
[TBC]