Imitations Carved Deep: Chapter 5
I don't know how I managed it, but I somehow forgot how tiring college could be. It's only been a week...
Not a Tony/Loki story. Just friendship.
Be forewarned, I have named female Loki, 'Kira', and that is what she will be referred to for a good chunk of the story.
Disclaimer: I don't own them...so sad.
Warnings: Severe angst. Stupid/Bad Thor (temporarily). Torture (in the past). Implied rape (in past). Don't read if any of these trigger.
Dinner and Deep Discussions
The distinct sound of crutches was coming down the hallway, and the others in the room (sans Bruce) frowned.
"I would have assumed Kira would be in a wheelchair right now, not crutches." Bruce could only shrug.
"When I suggested it, Kira was very averse to the idea and insisted on using crutches instead. I'm not sure what happened, but I get the feeling she had a bad experience with wheelchairs." Clint looked incredulous.
"I don't know how that works. I mean a wheelchair is a wheel- Umf!" Clint was swiftly silenced with an elbow to the gut, courtesy of Natasha. Kira, Pepper and Tony came around the corner, and their guest smiled at them warily. When no one moved, Steve came out of the kitchen and pulled out a chair for Kira to sit in. The young woman's eyebrows rose significantly, but she sat.
"Thank you- I'm afraid I don't know your name." Steve smiled warmly at Kira and pushed her chair closer to the table, setting her crutches within grabbing distance.
"My name is Steve Rogers, Ma'am, and like Tony is also known as Iron Man, I am also called Captain America." Kira nodded in acknowledgement and settled comfortably in the chair. Her emerald green eyes went to Natasha and Clint. The two assassins took the silent prompt. Natasha stood and offered her hand.
"Natasha, Black Widow." Clint stayed seated and waved.
"Clint, Hawkeye." Kira gave them a small smile but made a mental note to be careful around them. She was not a threat or 'spy' as they seemed to think, but they put her on edge. Natasha's eyes looked like they could skin her alive. Instead of focusing on this, however, Kira turned her attention to Dr. Banner.
"Can I assume you are known by another name as well, Dr. Banner?" The sudden tension in the room was not missed by Kira. Everyone had frozen and was looking at the doctor. Her brows furrowed close, and she looked around concerned. "I- I apologize for offending-" Bruce huffed out a laugh and continued his movements.
"You didn't offend me, Kira. You can call me Bruce…..Other people tend to know me…as the Hulk." Kira looked slightly confused but accepted the name.
"Very well, Bruce. That is an interesting name. I can guess as to the origin of the others' aliases, but could you explain yours?" The tension that hadn't quite left the room was back full force. However, Tony did his best to diminish it. He plopped down into the seat next to Kira and leaned back.
"C'mon, Brucie. Tell her about Big Green." Kira didn't say a word. She only observed the interactions going on around her and tried to decipher the reasons behind the oppressive apprehension. Before Bruce could answer the oven dinged, and Steve pulled out freshly baked bread. It smelled heavenly, and Kira's mouth watered instantly. Seeing people stand to set the table and get drinks, Kira reached for her crutches.
"Kira, you don't have to get up. I can grab something for you. Would you like some water?" The young woman hesitatingly set her crutches aside.
"Yes, Pepper. Water would be lovely, thank you." Kira felt distinctly out of place as those around her moved in a well practiced dance. When Pepper brought her clean water in a glass, Kira wanted to hug her. When food was set on the table, Kira nearly cried. It was rather embarrassing, so Kira did her best to hide her reactions. Based on the expressions of everyone else, she wasn't doing a very good job. As Pepper sat next to her and helped her fill her bowl (a light soup and fresh bread were on the menu) Kira couldn't hold her tongue any longer.
"Thank you all, very much. I- I don't know how I can ever repay you for your kindness." Kira viciously wiped away the traitorous tear that trailed down her cheek, and she was even more grateful that no one mentioned it.
"You are very welcome, and I refuse to take any form of payment. Kira, enough thank you's. If I hear one more, I will sick Steve's puppy eyes on you, and you don't want that. Trust me." Stark's words and the subsequent look on Steve's face startled a bark of laughter out of Kira. The sound surprised her, as she hadn't heard it in a very long time.
Her green eyes then found Bruce, who seemed as tense as ever. Kira smiled reassuringly at the doctor.
"Do not feel obligated to answer, Bruce. If you're not comfortable, I don't want to press you." Bruce smiled gratefully at Kira but shook his head.
"No. You really should know, since you're going to be staying with us for a few weeks." Bruce set his spoon down and stared at the table for a few moments. "Kira, remember you asked me about the accident I mentioned?" The black-haired woman nodded. She had wondered if that had anything to do with it. "Well, I was a scientist researching gamma radiation for the military. One day, there was an accident in the lab, and I was exposed to it. I got transformed into this…this Hulk. The Other Guy is huge and beyond strong and dangerous. I turn into him when I get very angry and startled." Dr. Banner gave a self-deprecating smirk. "So, it'd probably be best if you don't suddenly attack me in the hallway."
Kira watched all of those around her with scrutinizing eyes. Obviously, the story was old to them, but they were watching to see her reactions. If they were expecting to find a terrified, little girl, they will be sorely disappointed.
"It appears that you have some serious control over this Hulk. Otherwise I doubt you would have survived more than five days in this Tower with Stark." Clint choked on his water with laughter, but Tony pouted.
"Hey!" Kira simply raised a brow at the inventor.
"You strike me as the type to 'poke the bear', so they say." That gained her chuckles all around, while Tony obviously tried to bite back a smile.
"Well, you wouldn't be wrong," Bruce admitted. Kira still did not understand why the doctor seemed apprehensive about his alter ego. The man did not look thrilled to be discussing it.
"If you don't mind my asking, Doctor, but…do you not like being the Hulk? I just don't understand. I know…a few people who would be thrilled with your ability." Kira didn't miss the way everyone tensed around her. She held her hands in a placating gesture. "Not that I would want to find a way for them to be like you. They already lack the brain capacity and self-control to deal with their own, 'normal' anger." Shoulders unwound a bit, but Kira could still feel multiple eyes on her.
"I- the Hulk hurts people. He's destroyed entire towns before, hurt innocent people. When I was on the run from the military, they saw the Other Guy as a beast they could control, but I could barely control him! How were they going to possibly-" Tony held a hand out.
"Whoa, Bruce. Going green, Man." Bruce took some calming breaths, and the olive tinge receded. Kira couldn't help but be fascinated by what she had just seen, but she kept that to her self. Dr. Banner looked up and met Kira's eyes.
"I can't even have a heated discussion without he possibility of me turning into a…a-"
"A monster?" While Kira's tone held notes of camaraderie, the others around the table didn't seem to catch them. Instead, the young woman was suddenly surrounded by loud protests and yelling and- too much!
"Hey!" Kira could feel Pepper's hand on her shoulder, but the woman was standing, glaring at everyone around the table. "Stop it, right now. You are acting like children and scaring Kira. If you would stop and listen, you would know she wasn't insulting Bruce." Pepper sat back down, and Kira took a peak around, seeing everyone duly chastised (sans Bruce, who just looked at Pepper in amusement). Kira clenched her fists in an effort to stop the shaking; Steve caught sight of it and looked away in shame.
"Kira, it's okay. They can be a bit overprotective and jump the gun sometimes. I have a feeling you weren't calling me a monster," Bruce prompted. Kira forced herself to look the doctor square in the eye and nod. She was done being weak; she wouldn't be a frightened worm scared of loud, angry noises. She refused.
"Of course not, Dr. Banner," she started quietly. "Something in your eyes reminded me of…someone I knew. His situation wasn't the same, of course, but he had convinced himself that he was a monster, someone worth less than those around him. His family…well, he was raised with the belief that a certain group of people were savage brutes who thought of nothing but death and destruction." Kira huffed a laugh and rolled her eyes to the ceiling. "They were even used in bedtime stories to scare children." Kira focused her eyes back on Bruce. "Then one day, the father he had always been trying to make proud of him, announced that he was adopted…from this very same group of people he had been taught to fear and hate. He convinced himself that he was a monster, and as much as he hated his family and those that gave birth to him, he hated himself more."
The whole table was dead silent, listening to Kira's account. Something 'dinged' in the back of their minds, but they brushed it off. It definitely couldn't be the same thing. Suddenly, Clint whistled.
"Wow, that's messed up." Kira huffed.
"Yes, you could say that." Kira turned her eyes once more to Bruce. "Dr. Banner, my friend destroyed all he cared about and himself believing himself to be a monster not worth saving. I do not wish to see the same look in your eyes." Bruce was quiet, but sent Kira a small smile, one that managed to reassure Kira immensely. Dr. Banner was the one to break the awkward silence by clearing his throat.
"Thank you, Kira. Now, you should probably eat before the soup gets cold." Once the young woman had taken a few spoonfuls under the dutiful eyes of…well, everyone, Bruce continued. "I've drawn up a diet and rough schedule for you. I'm hoping it will get you back to a healthy weight, and eating regularly will definitely help in the healing process."
It was Kira's turn to be quiet, but everyone knew what she was thinking. 'What's the point if she's going to be back on the streets in a couple of weeks?'
What they didn't know, or what Pepper figured and everyone else hoped wasn't happening, was that Tony was already scheming ways that they would be able to keep Kira. He had already come up with ideas to find out her interests and what she's good at. Once he knew that, all he had to do was make a few phone calls, offer Kira to make her room permanent and voilà. To be honest, when he stopped to think about it, it scared him, how instantaneously he wanted someone. And not as a lover either!
There was just something about Kira that drew him in, like she could be his next Science Bro (since Dr. Foster can't deal with his style of humor). Bruce liked her too, so maybe it could work. Or Kira could become Pepper's assistant! Pepper liked her, and she works too much anyway. Who made her CEO?
Tony pulled himself out of his head long enough to really take a look at his house guest. In all honesty, Kira did not look good. She looked exhausted. Her skin was white as a sheet, making the purple moons under her eyes stand out. There was no hiding the pain she was in, winces and occasional hisses expressing how bad it was. Maybe the worst part for Tony was seeing the way Kira hunched over and protected her food. She acted like she was expecting it all to be a joke, and one of them was going to reach across any second and steal it away. Neither of which was true, making it poke a little harder at Tony's non-existent heart.
In the end, Kira was only able to finish most of the soup and half of her bread. Bruce was happy to see that the young woman had paced herself and didn't eat too quickly or too much. The others at the table insisted that Kira not get up, when she made to help with the dishes. She looked decidedly uncomfortable not having a task, so Steve attempted to engage her in conversation.
"Well, Kira, can I ask how long you've been in New York City?" Kira gave a short nod.
"I've only been here a couple of months. Before that, I was farther west. I didn't pay much attention to the city names." Kira's body language was distinctly defensive. Her shoulders hunched further in, and she pulled her arms and legs closer to herself. Steve wasn't one to press, but he did observe, as did the others.
"Okay!" Tony clapped his hands and pulled the attention away from Kira. "Dishes are done. People, it's movie night. Into the lounge for battle!" Kira looked confused, but could only gather that their movie nights were…very intense. Bruce paused by her, to lend her assistance if needed, and they both followed the hyped archer and inventor towards a very promising evening.
Revealing a bit of yourself are you, Loki? Hmmm? ;)
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