Author's Note: Thank you all for the reviews, they are amazing. Thank you for all the follows and favorites as well, they mean a ton. I hope you all like this chapter, it is one of my personal favorites so far.

Disclaimer: I do not own Game of Thrones, I own only Anna. Lyrics from I wish the best for you by Emerson Hart.

"How long can we wait here to say goodbye

the words once they are spoken

are words we can't take back

to where we were before things got in the way."

Chapter 7: Gods forgive me.

Anna

The blood had long since stopped flowing, but the pain still continued. Anna knew she was foolish for hitting the wall, she knew she was foolish for losing her temper in such a way. She was foolish for trusting Theon Greyjoy not to kill her brothers, and she was foolish for letting him. She was foolish for letting him get inside her head, she was foolish for loving him. Anna knew she was to blame for the atrocity committed against her brothers, that was on her hands. She would never forgive herself, she should have gone with them, she could have protected them. She knew Theon Greyjoy and his bitch sister were to blame as well, and she would never apologize for her actions against her.

"Lady Anna."

Maester Luwin entered her chamber and for a moment she thanked Theon Greyjoy in her head. She knew if he had not sent the Maester she would have sat in her room with bloody hands for days. She had fallen into madness, completely. She was broken, her brothers were dead and she could not bring them back. When she had lost her father it was hard, it hurt her deeply, but she had Robb beside her. With the loss of Rickon and Bran she had no one beside her, her twin was leagues away in the Riverlands. He could not hold her this time, and the man who did hold her had been the one to break her.

"What have you done, Lady Anna?"

The Maester's voice was calming, it was a voice she knew well but even that could not calm the storm inside of her. She was devastated at the loss and she knew he had been too. When she was cutting open the flesh of the Iron born she heard the Maester's screams. She was sure all of Winterfell could hear the two of them, screaming as the bodies of her brothers were hung above the gates.

"I let the wolf out of me."

Anna winced as the Maester began to wash the blood from her hands using water she had in her room. Once the blood was gone from her hands she could see how raw her hands had become, the knuckles on her hands red and swollen. The Maester made a disapproving sound as he began to apply a poultice to her wounds, before he wrapped her hands.

"You must be more careful, Lady Anna, I worry for you."

Anna was not worried for herself, not any longer. She had no reason to worry for herself, she had failed in keeping her brothers safe. She had promised them that no harm would come to them, she promised to protect them. How could she have been so foolish?

"I let them down, Maester Luwin, I should have gone with them." Her voice cracked.

"If you had gone your body would be hanging beside theirs."

Anna knew it was true, but she did not care. She belonged beside her brothers, she belonged with them. It was hard enough that she had lost her father, her sister was missing, one was held captive and now two of her brothers were dead. All she had left for certain was her mother, twin and half brother. She prayed a silent prayer that Jon was safe at the wall. She had not heard word from him in sometime, and she feared for his life as well.

"I will replace the bandages in a days time, until then get some rest."

Anna watched as the Maester went to leave but he stopped with his hand on the door. She could see there was something weighing heavily on the man's mind, something he wished to share. She did not bring it up, she just sat watching him. She knew if he wanted to tell her he would.

"You should convince Prince Theon to let you visit the crypts, my Lady. It may do you some good to be among your kin, even if they have long since past." His words were cryptic, his tone assertive.

Anna stared at the door when he left, his words lingering in her mind. She thought of visiting the crypts, of visiting the Godswood, she thought of going anywhere that was not her chambers. Anna feared that if she left her chamber it would only lead to the death of someone else, that was how it seemed to go for her. First Sir Rodrik, and then her brothers, no one was safe when it came to being close to her.

She decided when Theon came to her next she would ask him to let her go to the crypts, it would do her good to visit. When she was younger, she would visit the crypts monthly. She would take a single blue rose and bring it into the crypt, laying it upon her aunts tomb. She would do it again, she would find her peace among the dead.

It was hours before he came back, and when he entered her chambers Anna could see the worry etched on his face. Her heart caught in her throat, if he wasn't a killer she would have reached out and touched him. Had he not murdered her brothers she would find solace in him.

"Prince Theon, I was wondering if you would allow me to enter the crypts. Alone if you please."

She tried to keep her tone passive but she felt the poison she spit as she called him Prince. He was not a Prince to her.

"Anna.."

"It is all I ask of you, there are no weapons for me down there. I need to mourn my brothers properly and if you will not let me bury them, let me find my peace." Anna stood from her bed, pushing bile down in her mouth as she approached him. "Please, Theon, for me. I have not asked for anything."

She watched his dark eyes flash with compassion before all she saw was stone. She knew deep inside of him, her Theon still lived. He took her hands in his, looking over the bandages.

"For an hour, and if I find you have run away I can not promise your safety."

Anna wanted to hug him but she did not, she stood tall. She bowed her head to the man before.

"Thank you, Theon, thank you."

He insisted on escorting her, and she did not argue. They walked first to the glass gardens, Anna silently wishing for the old days back. The times when their walks were anything but innocent and the times when their hearts shared more than hate. When she found the rose she was looking for it was easy for her to take a single one, thankful that someone had continued to keep the garden going. He took her as far as the entrance to crypts, she knew he found no need to enter them. No one felt as if they belonged in them, only the blood of the Starks found comfort in the cold, dreary place.

"Anna."

He took her free hand in his gently before she could open the door to the tombs. She looked back at him with curiosity.

"I am sorry, I really am."

He left her with that and she wished to spit in his face again. She wished to punch him or stab him, but she wished to forgive him. She knew she could never forgive him for murdering her brothers, but she knew he was sorry. She knew somewhere inside of him he was truthful.

She lit a torch in the entry way before she made her way down into the darkness, it was cold and damp but it did not bother her. She felt dead already, she felt as if it was where she belonged, among the corpses of her dead kin. She walked deeper until she found the statue she sought, her namesake. She placed the rose upon the out stretched hand of her Aunt's statue. She was rumored to be beautiful, and Anna did not doubt it. Arya looked like their Aunt and if that was true than Anna did not doubt the rumors of her beauty. Arya would grow up to beautiful, she always knew that much.

"Aunt Lyanna, I know your spirit is locked inside this tomb and I am sure you don't hear when I speak but I am going to pretend for a moment you do. I am alone in Winterfell now, all our blood is gone. My brothers are dead, innocent children, slayed by a man I once called my love. I know you died for love, and I know my time will come and I will perish by love. Why does love cost us all those we call family?"

Anna stopped speaking when a footstep echoed through the crypts. She looked to see if anyone had entered but she could see no one, and she doubted Theon would come looking for her. She knew she had not been in the crypt more than ten minutes. She stood silent waiting for another sound but she heard none, until a voice cut through the silence.

"Are you alone?" It was barley a whisper.

"I believed I was until this moment." Her eyes were still upon her Aunt's face.

"Come deeper, leave your torch where it sits. Be silent."

Anna did as the whisper asked, and she followed it deeper into the depths of her family's grave. The dark shape led the way before her, and even in the darkness of the crypt she knew her way. She would play in the crypts with Arya, and the children of Winterfell. She spent many a time in the darkness. As she went deeper the shadow before her disappeared, and the first thing to catch her eye was a flash of yellow. Summer. And as torch was lit her thoughts were confirmed, curled at the feet of a boy was her brother's direwolf, Summer.

"Bran." Her voice was choked, she was seeing a ghost. "What kind of madness have I slipped into?"

"It's not a madness, sister, it's me." His voice was silent as Osha too stepped from the shadows.

Anna stood still her body frozen, her body glued to the stone floor. She started to laugh, a silent broken kind of laughter.

"Anna." Her brother's voice was soft. "Anna.."

She ran to him, he was only a foot from her but she ran to him. She fell to the floor beside her brother and pulled him to her. She held him, her body shaking.

"I thought you were dead, I saw the body and I thought he had killed you."

Osha was pulling Anna to her feet, yanking her from her brother.

"Rickon is further in, come on."

Anna ran ahead while Osha picked Bran up in her arms, she had to see him. She made her way through the dark, deeper until she came upon a lit area. Rickon sat with his back to her, he was playing with Shaggydog.

"Rickon." Her brother turned at the sound of her voice, and ran to her. "Oh my sweet."

As she held her brother in her arms she felt his tears hit her shoulder. The young boy was crying, and she felt herself cry as well. She held him tight, unable to let him go. Soon Osha, and Bran joined them.

"Anna, you are going to stay with us right?"

Anna put the young one down as he spoke. She knelt down to his level, looking into his beautiful blue eyes.

"I can not, love, but I am so glad you are safe." She ran her fingers through his hair, her bandages making the task uneasy.

"What happened to your hands, did he do that?"

Anna turned from the youngest child to her brother Bran. She could see the fire in his eyes, a fire she had seen in Robb's all too often. He would grow up to be very much like her twin.

"No, Bran, I did it to myself. I was very sorrowful, and angry over the thought of him murdering you. I lost myself for a few moments."

"I heard you screaming, I am sorry we couldn't come forward. If he knew.."

"Bran, I understand. If Maester Luwin had not sent me here I would never have known, knowing you are alive is all that matters to me."

Anna took Bran's hands in her own, as Rickon curled up next to her. She knew she could not stay long, she knew Theon would be back soon to get her. Her brothers needed to remain a secret, a secret to everyone.

"You loved him, didn't you? I saw you kiss once, a long time ago, I never told."

"Do not worry yourself with such things, brother, just worry about this little one." Anna ran her hand over Rickon's head. "You must be brave now, and strong. I believe in you, Bran. You will reach mother, and Robb, I have faith."

Bran looked at her deeply, his eyes full of emotions. She knew he would worry for her, and she would worry for him. They were blood, they were kin, and worrying for one another is what they have always done. She looked to Summer, and ran her hand over the wolf's fur.

"Summer, you will keep them safe. I know you will." She looked from the wolf, to the spearwife. "Thank you Osha for everything, you kept them safe and you thought wisely bringing them down here."

Anna knew Theon would never dare to enter so deep into the crypt, he knew it was not his place. He never belonged among the dead Starks, he knew that much. Even Jon would rarely seek the solace of the crypts, he never saw himself as a Stark but to Anna and her siblings he was. Jon Snow was her blood, and he belonged in Winterfell, and he belonged as a Stark.

"I must go now, loves, I can not risk your safety."

Anna kissed Bran upon the head and hugged Rickon close to her. She stood as her brothers watched her, sadness filling her. She did not wish to leave them, but leaving with the knowledge of their safety warmed her. Her madness would fade, knowing that the bodies upon the gates were not her brothers. She did not allow Osha to walk her out instead she found her way once more in the dark. When she reached the statue of her Aunt once more, she stopped.

"Blessed be the Gods of Old."

Anna ran her hand over the face of her Aunt, a silent tear running down her cheek. Anna had not lost her brothers to love, but she knew this was just the beginning of her journey. He had killed Ser Rodrik and two innocent children, and even those deaths could not be forgiven.

"Anna, it is time."

His voice echoed the empty halls, and Anna took one look back down into the darkness. She whispered her goodbye before she went to meet the man outside.

Theon had followed her back to her chambers, and he did not leave her alone, he locked himself inside with her. She took a seat upon the bed, refusing to look him in the eye. She could not tell him she knew the truth, if he found out he would no doubt kill them.

"Anna, I want to talk about your brothers."

She sat frozen, her hands upon her lap. He couldn't know, she had been so careful.

"I don't want to hear your excuses, you murdered them. My sweet little brothers, who had done nothing but look up to you. You saved Bran's life once, and I remember it. I remember what you did, and now you've taken him from us."

She did not cry, she did not have any tears left to shed over her fake dead brothers. She would mourn the dead children, the ones who had no name, when she had a private moment. They were not her kin but they were innocent children.

"Anna, they.."

"Silence, I don't want to hear it Theon." She looked at him with fire.

He was going to tell her the truth, she could hear it in his tone. She would not allow him that solace,she would not let him ease his own pain. She wanted him to know what it felt like to hurt, to know he had broken the one woman who loved him without condition. She knew it was wrong, it was without honor, but she did not care. She had spent days mourning her brothers, she had wept, and let herself slip into madness. She would not allow him to find peace.

"When must we marry?" She changed the subject.

"As soon as possible, my love."

He reached his hand out to her, but she did not take it. She looked upon him with hate, and she knew she could not keep that hate forever. He had gone too far, but love was love. Could Lyanna stop loving Rhaegar for the deaths of her blood? She doubted her Aunt had died without love for the Targaryen in her heart.

"Will you demand we share a chamber? Will I be forced to carry your children?"

She sounded as if it would be a fate worse than death.

"Anna, I do not wish to force you to do anything, I.."

"You can't truly force me any longer can you, you have killed my brothers. What reason now do I have to marry you?" She questioned.

She let her voice show her emotions, let him see what he had done.

"Your life suppose, if I could kill you that is." He looked at her and took his hands in hers. "Anna I.. I .."

She let him hold her broken hands, she let his touch linger as he stuttered. She had never known Theon Greyjoy to stutter upon anything. His tongue was made of silver, and he could make you believe any lie he wished to tell you. If you didn't know him of course. If you didn't know his eyes told all the truths, then you would believe everything he said.

"You could kill me, if you wanted to, I believe it."

"I couldn't, I could never kill you." One hand left hers and founds it way to cup her face. "I have hurt you enough, you should go and never come back. Leave and don't look back at Winterfell, Robb's men will be here soon and we will all perish."

Anna found herself leaning into his touch,as his thumb ran across her lip. She found a solace in his dark eyes, but she found pain there as well. He was serious, he knew when Robb's men came it would be the end for them.

"You wish me to flee? Why let me go when you killed them?"

"Because I am foolish, and because you are not them. I should have let them live, I should have let you all go a long time ago."

His hand still rested on her face, and their eyes clashed together. Anna felt herself leaning forward, felt her body being drawn in to him. He had shown her a weakness for the first time since he had taken her home, shown her a true weakness. She remembered the man she knew for just a moment.

"Theon." Her voice was a whisper before his lips met hers.

Anna did not fight the kiss, she let herself give in as his other hand also cupped her face. His lips tasted of salt and even far from the sea she felt as if the sea was kissing her. She closed her eyes, and let herself get lost in him for a moment. The kiss did not last as long as she wished it to.

"I can't."

"Just shut up, just shut your mouth."

She kissed him, and soon he was kissing her back. It was not innocent, it was not simple, they both held a fire inside of them. Anna kissed him with hatred, she kissed him hard enough to bruise his lips. She knew he was surprised, she was surprised in herself, but she did not care. Soon her arms were around him and she found herself straddling his lap as he sat.

"Anna." Her name came from his lips in a gasp.

"Just shut up."

Her lips found his again, and it took him a moment to let go. His hands reached for her hips and his tongue pushed inside her mouth. Anna let herself forget, let herself erase everything he had done. Her brothers were alive, and he was a murderer but for a moment she would let it go. She would let everything go for just a moment.

Theon picked Anna up and laid her onto the bed. Anna looked up at him her body flushed and for a moment she went to open her mouth, she went to curse him but she didn't. She watched as he rid himself of his breeches, and tunic. He stood before her naked, and she let her eyes roam his body. Her eyes eventually landed back on his face, and once more a subtle smirk reached his lips.

"Like what you see, my Lady?" His voice was husky, his tone filled with lust.

"Maybe." Anna hated herself for a moment.

He was on her a minute, tugging at her dress with fervent hands. He wanted her naked, and she knew it would take him no time at all. She knew he was skilled in removing clothes, and for a moment she wondered how many women of Winterfell he had fucked in his time. How many servants had he had in his bed since he had taken her home? She dared not dwell on those thoughts when his lips met her bare breast. His kissed, licked and sucked on the mounds of flesh, leaving her mouth to fall open in pleasure. She was naked before him, physically and emotionally. She let herself lay bare for him.

His lips continued down from her breasts, lower until he reached her womanhood. She felt her body flush, felt her face fill with heat. His tongue ran over her flesh, ran over the sensitive flesh. Anna wanted scream, she wanted to call his name but she did neither. She shut her eyes tight as his tongue and lips continued to make her feel overwhelmed with pleasure.

"Anna, look at me." He was hovering over her, and she knew what came next. "Do you really want this, because if not I won't do it."

She remembered those exact words, the exact look on his face, he had said them when he had taken her for the first time. She let herself smile for a moment, the memory so vivid in her mind.

"Shut up." She knew if he continued to question she would deny him, she knew she should deny him.

She was granting herself a moment of weakness, a moment of passion, with the enemy. With the bastard who came into her home, threatened everyone she loved and who would have killed her brothers given the chance. She could hate herself in the morning, she would hate herself in the morning.

"I love you, Anna Stark, I always have."

She meant to say something, she opened her mouth to say something, but only a moan left her lips as he pushed himself inside of her. She felt like she was starved, like she had been denied food for days. She wrapped her legs around him pulling him deeper into her center and she let her lips crash onto his. They kissed with a hunger as he continued to bury himself deeper inside of her, thrusting hard and fast. Anna lost herself in him, let her mind remain completely empty.

When he pulled himself from her, she felt almost empty. She did not say a word at first as they both laid naked breathing heavy in the bed. She did not reach for him like she would normally, she just laid staring at the grey ceiling. It was not until he made a move that she spoke.

"Stay?" She asked silently as he dressed.

" I can't, I still think you should leave. You should be gone by the morning."

She watched him dress, her body felt as if it would break down, she felt like she could cry. She didn't, she knew she couldn't, he was not worth her tears. Not anymore. She watched him dress, watched him look at her once more before he was gone.

"Gods forgive me." She whispered as the sound of a horn broke through her silence.

"You,me

why can't we see there is more to love then we'll ever know

Sometimes you're closer when your letting go."