Summary: A really short one. Kurt accomplishes something major and Blaine is not available. His thoughts in this moment turn dark.
Kurt could barely contain himself as he waited for his laptop to boot up. It was a little after seven now, and he had only just arrived home from physical therapy. He jingled his foot anxiously, willing it to load faster, until finally, with a clack of his keys, his computer unlocked itself. He loaded Skype, barely containing himself...only to find himself falling back heavily into his seat, disappointed.
Blaine was not there.
Once again.
He had not been online for the entire week.
All of Kurt's joy and excitement faded into nothing, and sadness settled into its place instead. He tried to shake off the feelings, taking a short cut to turn off the laptop before dropping heavily down onto his window seat. It wasn't Blaine's fault, he told himself morosely. It was midterms or him. Blain had, early in the previous week, outlined all the things he had due, and Kurt had found himself growing stressed on his behalf. He knew how much his boyfriend had to do, and he was proud of him for putting such dedication into it. It didn't change the fact though that that busy state left him with limited time for him, and, given the monumental nature of what Kurt had accomplished today, he felt it justified to feel sad and well, slightly hurt. In the beginning their Skype dates were a nightly affair, but it had steadily declined with time. Now, Kurt was lucky if Blaine managed to find the time on weekends for him anymore. He was just that busy and, once again, Kurt understood and did not fault him. Nevertheless, it was not a good time for him.
Jeff just wasn't the same as Blaine. And while he knew that Jeff could as easily celebrate his latest milestone with him, what Kurt really wanted to hear was "I'm proud of you poppet," in that warm, all embracing tone that would in an instant make all the frustration and pain Kurt had gone through to accomplish it worthwhile.
The longer he sat there, wallowing in his thoughts, the darker Kurt's thoughts turned. He could not help but envision Blaine now, seated in one of those huge libraries that Kurt would probably spend weeks getting lost in, studying all kinds of complicated theories whose names Kurt would probably not even be able to say correctly. Would Blaine even want him by the end of the semester, he wondered. After all, he was in New York and so exposed to everything that he was bound to eventually start seeing Kurt as inadequate. Was it that he was humouring him even now? What if his accomplishments now seemed childish and almost insignificant to his older, and now probably, considerably more mature boyfriend. Had that congratulatory text two weeks ago after the Warblers had successfully won Sectionals been sincere, or just a slightly condescending, let me humour him sort of message?
Maybe this near silence except for the occasional text was Blaine's way of slowly backing away from him?
Kurt didn't even realise when the first tear fell, but soon enough he was curling himself into a small ball and sobbing, glad that he was home alone so that there would be no one to hear his pain being vocalised. He was all alone. He wasn't even sure Blaine wanted him anymore. What would he do if he had to live his life without Blaine?
Managing to close his hand into a fist no longer seemed like an important thing.