Ahsoka- The Struggle

by HighjackLuv

After the death of Jedi Padawan Ahsoka Tano's Mother she discover's where her (Human) Father is hiding and goes looking for him and for answers. What happened in her Father's past? Why did he leave her and her mother as a child? Why did he leave the Jedi Order as a Padawan? Rated T just for safety.

4. Chapter 4- The letter

Answers for comments-

Guest- True, the war didn't start just yet when Ahsoka was taken to the Temple as little girl. In my mind I was writing it as in, trouble was rising by then. For my story Ahsoka was born about the time when Qui-Gon found Anakin. (Also In the story, Anakin was 9 when that happened, I don't know if that's actually true or not.) So 3 years later (After Darth Maul and Qui-gon's Death and all) when Ahsoka is 3 and is taken to the Temple, Anakin is like 12. In my story, trouble is rising sort of. More crimes and yea that stuff lol. But your right, no war yet. Though Nathaniel was suspicious that something serious was going to happen. Also, when I write Ahsoka's P.O.V. in this story, well it has to kind of change. I mean, Ahsoka's past with her mother and the one's she loved is different from what really happened in the TV Series. Wiki says something about Ahsoka being abandoned by her Parents. But in this story she wasn't abandoned. She misses her mother and she had a Jedi Human Father, which also means she's half human (Though not a lot of Jedi know that, hint hint lol). Ahsoka wants to be a Jedi Knight yes, but in the Series Ahsoka never had a family before the Jedi really, but in this story she did. She wants to be a Jedi knight but having parents, and knowing that one of them might be alive out in the galaxy changes Ahsoka's P.O.V. a bit. Lol I think I've bored you now. Haha but you get it right? I hope I've cleared this up to you and anyone else.

Mystery99- Sorry! That was a miss type. I wrote the last chapter before I posted the story actually. In the beginning I was going to call Nathanial, Conner, but I changed it. Sorry for anyone's confusion!

If you have any questions then you guys can comment or PM me and I'll get back to you. If it's an important question for the story that should be said in my story for everyone to know the answer then just like these answer's I'll post them in my next chapter.

So yea… I'll shut up now. ;) Geese you guys get me nerves lol Just kidding, luv you all! 3

Enjoy!

Chapter 4- The letter

Ahsoka's P.O.V.

I was lying on my bed in mine and Anakin's shared quarters on my stomach, starring at the object in my hand, my necklace. For my whole life since I was taken away from my mom, I could barely remember how my dad looked like. I knew he had blond hair and blue eyes, and I could sort of remember his figure too. But that was it.

He was a human Jedi Padawan at the time I was 3. I remember I had cried not wanting to go with Master Plo to the Jedi temple. But after I calmed down once we arrived, I couldn't help but feel curious as to where my daddy was. I lost my mother, but I had hope that I could finally see my dad again. My mother had told me to say Hi to dad for her.

But still when I arrived at the Temple I was super scared. All I remember was that I wanted my parents. The first few nights were terrible! I cried and yelled for my mom, and when she didn't come and wrapped her arms around me like she usually did, I got even more scared and started screaming for my dad. Luckily for the other younglings, they gave me my own room until I got more comfortable with the others.

Anyways, the nannies had to come in and try to quiet me down and sooth me. It didn't work at all at first. But that was because both two of the nannies were humans. It wasn't until they realized that I was afraid to death of anyone who wasn't a Togruta, that they changed both my nannies to two Togruta females. It didn't work totally, but I wasn't as scared as much, which was a plus for them. They would also speak Tagruti to me, because the whole time I was on Corasant, all I heard was Basic.

For the first nights of my first week at the temple it was like this, until the next night.

I did the same thing as usual when I was scared. I cried for my mom first and then my dad. I yelled out to my mom in Tagruti… nothing… I yelled out to my dad in Tagruti, tears running down my face… and a figure appeared out of the dark shadows of my room.

"Shhh… its ok baby girl. Daddy's here…" someone had said in Tagruti back to me.

I was surprised and shocked. I looked over to the Figure, and it stepped closer to me. The figure then sat on the side of my bed and looked down at me. And then I saw his face… it really was Daddy.

I missed him so much. That night, I hugged him to death never wanting to let go. My dad was actually there, in person right in front of me!

He whispered in my ears soothing words to calm me down. I mean I literally had a force grip on him. My nails were digging in to his chest, as if I thought, if I let go then he'd be gone forever.

Truthfully I wish I had never let go.

The next thing he did was tell me that he was getting me out of the Temple.

I was surprised, but I listened and did everything he said and told me to do. I remember him putting on my sweater on my little body. He then wrapped me in my blanket and picked me up. He stared singing the Lullaby my mother always used to sing to me in Tagruti, hoping somehow that I'd fall asleep. I didn't realize it until I was older, but I assume he probably sensed that I was scared.

He was a Jedi too after all. I'll be it, 20 year old Padawan but he was coming up to his Trials to become a Jedi knight.

He had picked me up and exited out the door of my bedroom with me.

The halls were dark… and I could barely see anything.

I started whimpering because I couldn't see my dad's face that well.

I held on to him for dear life and he rubbed my lekku up and down softly.

This went on for a few minutes. My dad would crouch every time we came to a corner and when he didn't see anyone he would keep walking.

*Flash*

I remembered a flash of light burned my eyes because they had adjusted to the darkness already. I had closed my eyes tightly, and all of a sudden my dad started running. He picked up his pace and I would lie helplessly in his arms.

I peeked out of the corner of my eyes and I saw a bunch of people chasing us.

I heard light sabers ignite and saw green and blue lights swaying up and down as the owners of those lights were chasing us.

We got to the part of the Temple with all the lights on. This part of the temple was huge.

"We're almost there baby girl, don't be afraid sweetie." He said, as we approached the doors of the Jedi temple that would allow us passage way to the outside world.

We thought we were going to make it… until… darkness.

That's all I remember, Darkness. Everything goes blank after that. I don't remember a thing.

All I remember next was waking up in the Medical Bay, a whole bunch of Healers surrounding me.

I don't know what happened, they didn't tell me anything. All they were doing was trying to comfort me because I was freaking out. But the fact that all of them only spoke Basic freaked me out even more.

I wanted my Daddy back… and I still do.

And now as I lay here on my bed, wishing I could cry for him back like that night. Wishing he would surprise me and come out of the shadows and comfort me again.

It was dark out now; I had already had come home from Ryle's house.

I didn't turn on the light to my room. I just came in to our chamber entering the living room and then right to my door. Everything was dark, but that's how I like it to be.

I felt my necklace Daddy had given to me as a Baby. I clasped it in to my hand and held it tight, making a slight fist. For my life, I can't remember what happened. No one explained anything to me, just sort of thought I'd forget about it. But I didn't, not all of It at least.

I asked and asked when I was little. But they ignored me and instead talked about other things.

Somehow though, I kept my mouth shut about him being my dad. I never talked about that once. I don't know if they knew I was his daughter or not but I didn't want to take a chance.

I sighed. Well, I've been thinking about it for a while and I think I know what to do.

I need to find out what happened that night, but how? If I go around asking Jedi Knights or Masters that where at the chasing scene (If I can even remember who) they'd send me to the council and the council will wonder why I want to know. Since Jedi cannot have attachments, they'd expel me from the Jedi Order.

I could go and ask Master Plo if he knew. I trust him well enough. But no… he's part of the council too. But he wouldn't rat me out, right? Even still, there's a reason why he never told me about it in the first place. Ughhh… this is going to be more complicated than I thought.

Well I could at least look through the holo records. But I don't even know my father's name, I don't really even know how he looks like except the few details I was told by my mother and saw myself.

But I'm a Jedi, this is what we do. I'll find out who my dad is and what happened one way or another. I owe it to my Mother to find out what happened to him. And I owe it to myself.

Diiinnnggg… Diiinnnggg…

Someone rang the doorbell to our chambers. Each chamber in the Jedi Temple has a Door bell.

I got up from my bed an exited the room. I entered the living room and unlocked the door with the force and the door slid open. As the doors slid open I saw a Jedi Padawan, about my age or so. She was of the Balosar species, she had light light purple hair and her skin was like a humans. Balosar's are near Human Species, but they have antennas.

"Hey Ahsoka, got mail for you."

"Dimi, what are you doing giving out mail? You don't work in the Temple."

"Oh, I sort of got in trouble out in the Battle field. The council gave me mail duty as punishment. What do the Jedi that weren't picked to be Padawans do all the time? This is just boring."

"Well, be glad the force decided you'd be picked. Or else you'd be doing things like this for the rest of your life."

"Oh yes, no wonder the council gave me this Job… to actually learn something haha."

I rolled my eyes' at her playfully; at least I can still do that.

"So, I assume you have some mail for me and my Master, unless you came here to just chat and slack off."

"What? Nooo I would neverrr do that!" She said sarcastically. "Actually yes, you do have some mail. Five in all." Then she handed me the mail.

"Thanks Dimi, I'll see you later."

"See you around!" She said with a smile, and then she was off.

I walked to the kitchen table with four chairs, two on each side, and sat in one of them.

I looked at the first one, Anakin's.

Second one, Anakin's.

Third one, Anakin's.

Fourth one, Anakin's.

I tossed all those on to the table aside. The last one I saw my Name Ahsoka Tano written by hand on it. The strange thing is it was written in Tagruti, but why? It didn't say on the package where it was from.

Suddenly I was afraid to open it. The force was telling me something… I had a strange feeling.

I slowly took my trembling hand and started opening it. Trembling hand? Come on Ahsoka your tougher than this, what's gotten in to you?

I pulled out what was inside, and it was a piece of paper. I pulled it out, and it looked like a letter.

I started reading the Hand written Tagruti words.

Dear Ahsoka,

The last time we saw each other, we said goodbye. Goodbye as in I'll miss you, but I'll see you again. What we didn't know was, that goodbye was supposed to be forever. No vacation… a War. A War that is foolishly yearning for power. Both sides corrupt, both wanting dominance.

I was so miserable when I found out the truth, that you were to be put in this War for somehow, your own protection. It hit me when I was little that I was never going to see you again. My own sister.

Have you forgotten me? Is the Jedi life so fascinating, enough to forget all your worries of the past? Please tell me you know who this is. Please tell me you can tell just like that. If you can't then I understand. We've been apart for so long, we use to be like twins. Everyone in our tribe thought we were. Do you know who I am now?

I'm your other half that misses you terribly.

Understand that I'm sorry, but this life you're living… it isn't for you. You belong somewhere so much better.

One way or another, I'm going to see you again. Maybe you don't want to, maybe you think "Whoever this person is, he or she is crazy" But I'm not. Maybe the Jedi have brain washed you. That you think you should have to do your part in their War and fight. That you belong there, but you don't! You're not their breakable toy soldier they can play around with like kids. Don't you realize that?

I'm sorry we've been apart for so long. And I'm sorry you might have thought I was dead. But I'm not, I'm alive. I'm fighting to survive on the outside world that I am so not use to. But I'll survive, don't worry about me. I just wanted to let you know… not everyone died. I wasn't even there when it happened.

I miss you dearly sister. I'll see you soon, I promise.

Love, Anna

I let my hand that was holding on to the letter fall down to the table.

I couldn't believe it, Anna's Alive! But why wasn't she on Shili? Where is she now? It doesn't matter, all that matters is my sister's alive! I can't believe it…

Tears started to well in my eyes. Oh no Ahsoka Tano! You better not cry! You've cried enough, it's time to toughen up again and act like the Jedi you are. No more crying…

I sniffled and wiped my eyes fast. I got up out of my seat from the kitchen table and went back to my room. I was not going to cry.

As I entered my room I opened my writing desk's little drawer and dropped the letter in there. No need to leave it out in the open and let Anakin read it. Really if Anakin found and read the letter it wouldn't really do anything, I just think this is my personal life and he doesn't need to know anything.

Nothing would happen, but that also means there's also no reason he should read it.

I took a deep breath and calmed myself. I just found out, my longtime friend, my sister, is alive and well. I was soooo happy! I thought for sure she had died, so I didn't bother looking for her dead body. But I couldn't be happier. Anna's words about the Jedi didn't really bother me. She, like my mother and many other Tagruta from our tribe that died, felt as though taking me was the lowest thing they could've ever done. The Jedi didn't give a great impression for wanting me on their battle field.

Well at the time, it was missions for crimes and all. But War started, and Anna is probably even more worried. Heh, funny I bet Ryle and Anna would love each other! Or be jealous of each other. There would be no middle for those two haha!

I started walking out the door. First stop, mess hall. Second stop, Library. I need to find out who my dad really is and what happened to him that night. My worst fear would be… no. He's not dead, I know it. He's not! Right?

I really wouldn't know, but I hope not. I hope he's alive. Not that I'd be able to see him again, I'm a Jedi and my path lies here. I'm needed in the war, more Jedi are always needed.

Anna's P.O.V.

"Faster!" I yelled, heart pounding.

"They're catching up!" Rena said.

"Not for long! Rena, Devin, you guys take those two. Kendall and I will take the other two!"

"Got it!" Devin said.

We all stopped and turned around, facing the ones who were chasing us. We stood in our defending positions. They stopped as well, taking out their electro swords. One man in the middle of the four stood tall and pointed his sword at us.

"You spoiled brats will regret what you did!" He said in a gruff and angry commanding voice.

"Hah! And how in the world will you make us regret it? It was freakin hilarious! I'd do it again in a heartbeat!" Rena said, talking about how we stole the key from them and in the proses getting them all soaked in mud. Trying to get these other guys angry… It worked.

"You'll pay you little frags!" he said.

He furiously charged at us, along with the other three. We somehow split them up and started fighting.

The guy that was furiously mad decided to take me on instead of Kendall. He slashed at my head, I ducked and tried to swipe at his legs but he flipped back and took another strike at me again. As he flipped back I turned around a full 360 degree turn and blocked his electro sword with my own electro sword I had stolen for this purpose. Not really liking the sword much but I wanted to try something new.

He slashed at my head but I blocked it, pushing him back. I charged forward and to his surprise flipped over him. He didn't turn fast enough and I was able to cut him on the shoulder and sent a bit of shock threw him. He stopped for a second because of the pain and so I saw my opportunity and kicked him in the leg, he bent down and I jumped and swipe kicked at his head and then quickly landed stomping my foot on his stomach as he fell on the ground.

I looked around and the other three guys were taken care of as well. Psh, regular patrol soldiers were so easy.

"Come on guys, let's go." I said to them.

"Anna… aren't you forgetting something?" Devin said. The three of them looked at me.

"What do you mean?" I said, playing dumb.

"Anna you know what we mean. Three of them are dead, but one of them is alive."

I rolled my eyes at them. Just because they wanted me to kill doesn't mean I'm going to. They may find it easy, but I won't do it unless I have to. I didn't have to this time, I wish they'd just let it go.

"No guys. I don't kill just anyone alright? When are you going to learn that I will never do that?" I said annoyed. I really was, because they knew as well as I do that I don't like ending someone's life if I can just knock them out instead.

Kendall walked over to the one I took on who was sprawled out on the floor. He was still breathing, just like they all expected.

He raised his own sword, "NO! DON-" but it was too late. He stabbed him right in the heart.

"Why did you do that?!" I said. I was seriously angry now. I mean, I don't know the guy and yes he was pretty mean, but I didn't want to kill him. He was armless and who knows, maybe he even had a family.

"I had to Anna, don't you see that this guy deserved it?" he said. I frowned at him.

"Anns, come on your acting like the Jedi." Rena said. I shook my head.

"I am not acting like them! Just because I still see value in other people's lives no matter how messed up they are doesn't make me like them. You didn't even know him." I said, folding my arms together and gave all three of them my 'Glare'.

"It doesn't matter; he was a Demon of The New! Anyone that's with them is sick for fighting for them."

"He was just doing his job." I whispered.

Devin rolled his eyes back at me, "Job? At what? Being a murdering soldier? Yea why not just let him live, because I mean he probably has sooo much good in him! Can't you see Anna? He deserved to die! The less of him means less bad guys." He told me.

"Whatever. Let's just go, I've got things to do back at the Temple. So we best hurry and get to the ship with the Key before someone else finds us." I said in an angry tone. I turned away from them.

Rena sighed, "Don't be mad Anna" she said putting her hand on my shoulder, I pushed her hand back. More like swiped it back, with my hand. "Don't touch me. Let's just go."

With that I walked off in the direction where our ship was, which was where I was facing in the first place. The rest followed, not talking. They know not to mess with me when I'm angry.

I never use to be so angry or stressed all the time, but ever since I joined the Shadow Order I've changed quite a bit. But one thing that's never changed about me is the fact that I am not a killer. I kill only if I have to. They kill too easily.

They as in Rena, Devin, Kendall and the rest of the Shadow Order, but that's merely one bad thing about this Order. I still see them as way better than the Jedi. This Order is my Family.

Rena is a human who's 16 years old, one year older than me. She has long wavy black hair and tan skin with blackish brown eyes.

Devin is also human, with brown short hair and green eyes, Fare skin with toned muscles. He's 17.

And Kendall, who is again also human, had Blond spikey hair and blue eyes. He was tall and muscular with a chiseling facial feature. He has a few scares like Devin and well…. all of us, but only one on his face on the side of his chin. He was 18, the oldest of us.

Rena was like a sister, and Devin and Kendall were like my brothers. I love them… but there's only one thing we disagree on. And you can probably guess what that is.

I sighed. We were now standing in front of the ship. As we entered I took a side chair while Kendall took the middle chair, because he was going to be navigating the ship since I did it when we came.

When we were already in space and went to light speed I closed my eyes and leaned back.

What I need right now is to rest, I'm already stressed enough as is on worrying about my sister.

Ahsoka… you're the only one I'll ever be able to be myself with…

I got up and went to the back without saying anything to anyone. I needed a rest.

Sooo… how was that? Yes yes I'm sooo sorry nothing really interesting happened with Ahsoka except Anna's letter. Ahsoka is the main character after all.

I'll make it more about Ahsoka and trying to find out who her father is in the next chapter. You guys know the description says she's wants to go find him so you'll have to wait and see what happens to Ahsoka about that, she won't be leaving in the next chapter I can tell you that, because that still seems way too fast for me.

Anyways, if you have any suggestions on what I should do for my next chapters then tell me! Usually I'm never done writing till the day I actually have to upload it lol. So tell me what you think, ask any questions you want and all that jazz. (Don't judge me!)

;) Hmmm should I have a sign off? Ya know like how people say good bye in the end of their stories? Lol tell me what you think about that too. Because I honestly have no clue.

Commet! Tell me what you think because I love hearing what you guys have to say.

Oh and all guest that comments, make an Account so I can thank you guys soooo much!

Love you guys and hoped you enjoyed this chapter!

And now for more thank youz!-

Thank you to all who have added Ahsoka-The struggle on your Alert List! 8/27/13 – 9/2/13

ahsokatano191

nigeltje

war sage

hannah skywalker

Thanks to all who Favorited this story! 8/27/13 – 9/2/13

nigeltje

randompadawan

horselover95

war sage

hannah skywalker

Thank you to nigeltje who followed me! 8/27/13 – 9/2/13

Thank you to all who Commented 8/29/13 – 9/2/13

Mystery99

ahsokatano191

war sage

1 guest

Thank you all! See you later! ;)

P.s. - Thank you Mystery99 for following me since 7/27/13.! ;) Sorry I forgot youz! Forgive me? *Gives puppy dog eyes* Please? x)