My Pet Peeve
Disclaimer: Naruto isn't mine.
"Thank god that's over." Shikamaru dumped the last of his things onto the bed feeling relieved that there was nothing else to come. He'd bought more than last time due to a larger room. When he'd picked It out with its' bay windows and large comfy double bed, the boy had expected that he'd get to enjoy it all himself. It seemed fate was laughing at him.
"You done yet? 'Cause I've been waiting ages and I'm boooorreed." As usual Hidan had done nothing to help and had simply lazed around moaning about the lack of fun. The only plus side was that they were away from the embarrassment of being at home.
The porn magazine incident had not ended well. Hidan had been serious about burning them and as they were lighting up their erotic bonfire Shikaku had found out.
The screams of 'my stash!' And the look on Yoshino's face when she'd worked out what it was that her husband was attempting to save was something Shikamaru would much rather forget.
"I would've finished faster if you had actually helped out rather than being a lazy ass." Considering that he himself was known for his laziness, this really said something.
"... I thought you had it covered?"
"Nice try. Now grab a box and help me."
"Eh? But you've already shifted it all!"
"It still needs to be unpacked though, so get to it." Shikamaru started stacking books on the shelves whilst Hidan grudgingly started rifling through another box. He may be more of a smartass than he was before but he still wouldn't really defy Shikamaru that much. For now at least...
"Hey Shika!" I doubt that's a good sign. He turned round to see Hidan grinning and holding out a pair of Speedos. "Where'd you get these? I've never seen you wearing them." Oh dear god.
"Those are not mine and I'm thinking dad put them in there."
"Why? He's a pretty fucked up old man isn't he?"
"I'm not even going to comment on that one but those are going straight in the bin. Now."
"...Try them on first."
"What?!"
"Come on Shikaaa, you'd look fucking adorable."
"I'm not giving you an excuse to touch my ass!" Hidan wasn't known for resisting his urges at the best of times so it was hardly going to be any better while he was practically naked.
"Just do this one thing for me! Pleaseeeeeee!" And so resumed the whining. Shikamaru yearned for the good old days when he had a room all to himself and no one to bother him. He looked at Hidan who was giving him the puppy dog eyes and attempting to look cute. Despite how annoying the boy was, there was no denying that he did liven things up. Even if sometimes it was tempting to lock him in the cupboard.
"No. We can do anything else you want to do later but not that." It took Shikamaru's brain a few seconds to process what he'd just said.
"Anything~?" The look on the older boy's face sent a shiver down his spine and he gulped.
"Wait! I didn't mean that!"
"Don't take it back now! Don't you trust me? You can be such an asshole sometimes!" Guilt tripping always worked on him and Shikamaru knew he was going to cave.
"For god's sake, fine!"
"Yes~!" Hidan started doing some kind of strange little victory dance.
"...What the hell is that?"
"What?"
"That dance? What was that about?" He smirked a little and Hidan scowled.
"I'm happy! Fuck you." The boy was turning red and it was a little adorable. He never seemed to get embarrassed so it was a nice change.
"Ok, I'm sorry."
"Now about that favour..." Uh oh. It seemed he was going to get some revenge.
"What did you want?" If it's sex related, I'm running.
"Ribs~!"
"...What?"
"Lots of ribs! Covered in shitloads of barbecue sauce! Please Shika?"
"...You just want meat?"
"Well it's not like you'd do anything else. Come on Shika!" Thank god.
"Fine. I'll have to order it in though."
"Fuck yes! You're awesome."
"Nice to know." He really is like a dog.
-Page Break-
Damn this is awkward. Shikamaru was turning a deep shade of red and was in two minds about what to do.
After stuffing his face, Hidan had decided it would be a good idea to sit next to Shikamaru and lean up against his shoulder. If they didn't look like a couple before they definitely did now. The most mortifying bit was that in a way he was kind of enjoying it. Before the other boy had come along, he'd never been one for physical intimacy with other people but it was different when it came to Hidan. It was almost enjoyable.
No! This is just too embarrassing. If anyone else sees I'll be given crap about this for years!
"Err Hidan? Do you mind getting off of my arm?" The other boy looked up and scowled at him.
"This is comfy! Why the fuck should I?"
"It's embarrassing!"
"But we're both enjoying it! Just stop being a prude and admit that you like it as much as I do."
"No means no." Quickly, before the other could stop him, he pulled his arm free and pushed up against the other side of the sofa.
"Hey! What the fuck is wrong with you? You are such a dick."
"If I want you touching me I'll let you know. At the moment I'm happier over here." ...I think.
Hidan scowled at the brunette. It was clear it was a mutual thing so why was he being so useless? He was always stuck with people who never gave him the amount of attention he felt he deserved. This time would be very different though. Shikamaru was smaller, weaker, and obviously keener than Kakuzu had ever been. It was just finding a way to make him admit it without him getting pissy and storming off like usual.
"Right you, get your emotionally constipated ass over here now!" To Hidan this was being nice.
"Excuse me?!" ...Damn, he just looks even more pissed off.
"...Just come here!"
"What is wrong with you today? I told you, I'm not in the mood for you games."
"Err..." Why am I so goddamn awkward! For fuck's sake! He'd never been a shy person but he was still useless when it came to people.
"Are you ok?" It was rare that Hidan was lost for words like that so it usually meant either he was planning something, or that something was wrong.
"Yes. No. I don't know!" He was just trying to force the other to stop being so useless and admit that he liked him. It was usually easy for Hidan to just say what he was thinking and get it done but today he felt stupidly flustered and it was driving him mad.
"Well what's wrong? And this better not be you tricking me so you can get a grope in." Son of a bitch! I'm not that bad!
"I don't do it that often!"
"You do it enough. Now just tell me."
"It should be obvious what the problem is! You're just so bloody stupid that you can't use that fucking head of yours!"
"You're not making any sense at all! Why are you so angry?!"
"Just tell me that you love me asshole!" Shikamaru was lost for words at that. Not to mention the fact that his face was turning bright red.
"Wh-what?"
"I'm not an idiot, even if you seem to think I am! I know you really care about me and I love you, I think you're fucking awesome! You're always screwing around with me and it pisses me off you stupid jerk!" This was closer to his usual standard of conversation.
"I-." Well crap. Do I like him? Shikamaru looked at the scowling eyes and the sulky pouting and gulped. It would seem so... I can't just say it though, can I? Shit, what did I used to do? It had been a while since his last girlfriend and Hidan was very different to anyone else he'd met.
"Do you need me to do every little thing? Fucking hell Shika!" He stormed across the room in his usual way, grabbed a pad of paper, and started writing all over it.
"What are you doing?"
"Oh wow, it talks." The sarcasm was obvious.
"That's a bit rich coming from you!"
"Just shut up and read this!" He held out the paper and seeing the words on it just made the younger boy even more tongue tied.
"Um..."
"Just read it! I'm putting all the work in so at least make some effort here!"
"Ok... 'I- I love you and I...'" When he realised when the next part said he wasn't so amused. "Ok, I'm not reading that."
"Why not? We both know it's true."
"...Just shut the hell up."
"Come on Shika! If you really love me, you'll say it."
"That has nothing to do with love. That is one of your weird twisted fantasies and it's not gonna happen." Damn he knows.
"Tch. Well at least you said the most important part."
"Yeah I suppose I did..." And it was stupidly awkward. "Is that enough for you?"
"Hmm..." There's something missing here... Oh! "We're missing something important."
"What now?"
"The fucking physical affection!"
"...Ok, I need a little more to go on than that."
"Well I don't know about the specifics. I'm not asking you to wank me off though before you go off on one."
"Well that's a relief. What exactly do you want though? You know I don't normally do that kind of thing."
"Just something! I need human contact, I'm not distant like you. Pet me like a fucking dog for all I care, as long as it's something!"
"Pet you?"
"If that's what you're into..."
"No! Stop causing these kind of weird conversations! They're embarrassing!"
"And yet despite all my shit, you still love me~."
"Hn."
"Seeing as you didn't say no and seeing as it's you, I'm gonna take that as a full blown confession."
"...Ok." It was better than stuttering through it awkwardly. It wasn't his fault he wasn't used to relationships. Especially ones that involved people as mad as Hidan.
"Damn you're shy. And you gave me all that shit for the not talking thing!"
"Just knock it off before I exile you to Ino's room."
"That would be harsh!"
"You hate her that much?"
"She's an irritating bitch."
"She's not that bad, she's just nervous around you. Besides there are much worse than her around."
"I guess..." There was an awkward silence and it occurred to Shikamaru that in an unexpected turn of events he had acquired a boyfriend. Now that was something he never thought would happen. Even a girlfriend would've been weird to him but this was something else.
Hidan was the one who got sick of the awkwardness first and pulled Shikamaru onto his lap and put his arms around him.
"What are you doing?"
"Don't you like this?" This is actually pretty comfy.
"I-It's not too bad..."
"Heh. I knew you liked it~."
"Hn. But if your hands stray south of my hips, I will not be best pleased."
Sadly I'm back at uni so less time to write this but I shall do my best to keep updating now I've got back into it :3 Wanted to post a link to this:
art/HidaxShika-Nya-399531092 (On Deviantart website)
Drawn by my best friend for my birthday last month :3 It's a very cute HidaShika picture so give it a look ^^