My Pet Peeve

Disclaimer: Naruto isn't mine.

"You're a dumbass." Shikamaru had expected to be yelled at but he still flinched. "Why didn't you say something?!"

"Because I knew I was being an idiot?"

"If you knew you were being a fucking idiot then why did you do it?" Hidan was standing above him with his hands on his hips and an expression of distaste. Sitting on the bed, Shikamaru felt like a small child being scolded by a parent.

"Because I was too stupid to think of that…" Not for the first time that day, Hidan bopped him on the head with a clenched fist. He never hit him that hard but Shikamaru still winced.

"You're just lucky I feel like forgiving you. You're gonna have to make it up to me though."

"Ok…" This would be troublesome to deal with. Hidan was worth it however, even if he was a pain in the ass sometimes. "….And I have to know, where were you?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?" Shikamaru raised his eyebrow. "I was with the dog-loving prick."

"Kiba?" That was unexpected. "…They all knew you were there didn't they?" It would explain why they broke off in the middle of conversations whenever he appeared.

"Only that guy and the blonde. Maybe the moody one too, I don't know."

"I see…" He could understand why they were helping Hidan but it still annoyed him that he'd received no hint that all was ok.

"Before you get in a huff, I told them I'd be breaking legs if anyone told you I was there."

"I just wanted to know that you were ok…"

"I'm not a child!"

"I was still worried! I didn't know if you were sleeping rough or if you'd… if you'd gone off with someone else." As soon as he'd said it, he cringed. It sounded so stupid. He saw Hidan's hand move and braced himself for the pain. Instead he felt a weight settle on his head. Hidan was patting him on the bead, albeit slightly awkwardly.

"You're a complete fucking dumbass. Moron. Prick. Imbecile." The patting and the insults made for a very strange combination.

"I am well aware of that." He had been calling himself that all week. As had Ino who had shouted it at him every time she'd walked past.

Hidan sat next to him on the bed a short distance away. He was scowling at the ground and Shikamaru looked away. It was hard to make eye contact right now. The bed moved a little as Hidan shifted slightly closer, still not looking at Shikamaru. Both of them were very aware of the other's presence and finding it hard to think about anything else. Gingerly, Hidan reached out a hand and put it next to Shikamaru's, lightly touching the side as he did.

After only a moment's hesitation, Shikamaru moved his hand over Hidan's, inter-lacing his fingers with the other's. They sat like this for a long time, hands clenched together and in silence. Until Hidan leant over and put his head on Shikamaru's shoulder. He was going red but still scowling. Shikamaru had frozen when this had happened but eventually, he allowed himself to relax against Hidan. They released each other's hands and put their arms around each other's waists, now completely pressed together. It was the most intimate they had been in a long time.

"This doesn't completely make up for your shittyness you know."

"I know. I'll have to try harder." Shikamaru wasn't sure he had the confidence to do anymore but he was certainly determined to do something for him. Hidan deserved it.

"Oh? What you gonna do then?" He didn't have to look to know that Hidan was smirking.

"I-."

"Shika! Have you-?" Ino froze in the doorway when she saw that he was not alone. "You found him!"

"I did," said Shikamaru through gritted teeth. She really was good at interrupting important moments.

"That's awesome." She seemed to be pointedly ignoring the fact that they were trying to reconcile. "Anyway, have you seen my keys? I lost them."

"No."

"You sure?"

"Go and look somewhere else!" Hidan sounded very annoyed.

"That's rude."

"Ino." She looked at Shikamaru. "Fuck off." He could tell even Hidan was surprised by this.

"What?! I was only asking you a question!" Shikamaru couldn't even be bothered with this troublesome argument right now. Instead he faced Hidan who was gazing at him and looking kind of impressed with the use of insult, and forced his lips onto his. Hidan kissed him right back, and they stayed like that a while, completely ignoring Ino who eventually got bored and left them to it.

Neither of them really cared about her at that point. When they pulled apart, Shikamaru found himself just staring, feeling so satisfied that he just wanted to take him all in. He didn't realise how intently he'd been staring until Hidan smirked.

"Look who's being all forward. Not so much of a prude now, are ya?"

"I thought you liked forward?" Had this not been what he'd been complaining about for months?

"I do. I didn't tell you to fucking stop!"

"Then I won't." He needed to have that smirk wiped off of his face anyway.

-Four Years Later-

"Are you sleeping again?" Shikamaru opened one eye and looked up at Sasuke who was staring down with a raised eyebrow.

"Just resting my eyes." It was hard to do so on his desk since it was covered in several weeks' worth of paperwork but he didn't care that much.

"You could at least take off the lab coat. I don't know what kind of crap you've been handling but it's all over your face now." This was a good point and Shikamaru sat up, removing the probably contaminated garment.

"There you go mother." Sasuke rolled his eyes and carried on working. His own desk was immaculate so he didn't know how much more he could clean it. Out of all the labs he could have worked in, it had to be the same as the one Sasuke was in. It made it harder to slack off. "How long have we got?"

"Half an hour." Damn… He could not be bothered to carry on. He'd finished everything he needed to do well over an hour ago.

"I'm leaving now."

"If that's what you want. If anybody asks where you are?"

"That I needed to get back for my dog."

"Your dog." Sasuke smirked. "Have fun with that."

"I shall."

It didn't take him long to get out of there. He was used to making a quick and undetected escape from work, having had a few years of practice. Though it did involve ducking behind cars…

Once he'd turned a corner, he relaxed and made his way homewards. It wasn't too far since he'd wanted to be near to work and Hidan hadn't given a shit either way.

When he reached the flat, Hidan was sat outside with a scowl on his face that seemed to be aimed at anyone who dared to walk past. He hopped up when he saw the pineapple brushed ponytail approaching.

"It's about fucking time!"

"You locked yourself out again, didn't you?" He was barefoot and only wearing trousers and a shirt.

"It wasn't my fault! That motherfucking Ino tricked me!" This again?!

Ino and Choji only lived around the corner and so Ino and Hidan had been getting at each other constantly. Considering that Hidan had managed to trap her under a bin once, this seemed a pretty tame rebuttal.

"You two are so troublesome…"

"Everything's troublesome to you! Now open the fucking door!" The last part of this sentence came out as a high-pitched whine, only perceivable by dogs.

"Fine." It would shut him up at least

Hidan practically dashed past him, throwing himself onto the ground in front of the electric heater.

I got the dog part wrong… He's more like a cat… A very needy cat. He stared down at his boyfriend who was currently pouting. An adorable cat… As usually happened when he had these kinds of thoughts, he blushed a little. He was too awkward to be comfortable with it, even if Hidan couldn't read his mind.

"Thinking dirty shit again are ya?" He'd spoken too soon. Hidan was grinning up at him.

"No."

"You're blushing. Dumbass~." It was irritating that he became so smug over this.

"There was nothing sexual in it so drop that." Hidan raised an eyebrow.

"Oh really?"

"Yes!" Irritating bastard.

"So why are you so damn red?" Because you keep mentioning it! Was what he wanted to say.

"I was just thinking that you were adorable!" was what he came out with. Hidan grinned even more and Shikamaru glared, dumping his bag onto the ground and making his way to the kitchen. Ever since the 'big fight' as they called it, he'd tried to be a lot more open. The problem was that he still felt weird as hell about it. It made the whiner happy though which led to less complaining.

"Oh Shika~." He ignored the needy being behind him and focused on making coffee. "Don't ignore me dumbass."

"I'm busy."

"And I'm still cold!" He came up behind his smaller boyfriend and squeezed him round the middle. "Share your warmth!"

"Wow, you're freezing." He practically felt like an icicle.

"Told you. Now help me out!" Shikamaru sighed.

"Fine."

Coffeeless, Shikamaru ended up on the sofa next to Hidan, pushed up against each other. It was mainly Hidan wrapping himself around Shikamaru but it was comfy enough.

"Better?"

"It's better than nothing."

"Well that's nice."

"You're all stiff and awkward."

"Because you're cold." And he calls me a dumbass.

"Don't back talk me."

"And don't slap me round the head." He was surprised he didn't have brain damage from all the years of it.

"You need it. You're a major dumbass."

"Prick."

"Wanker."

"Whiny bitch."

"Smug asshole."

"…I missed you."

"Of course you did. Sasuke is a boring Uchiha prick." Shikamaru was glaring at him. "Obviously I missed you. It's boring as hell here."

"Except for the Ino bashing."

"Heh…" Clearly he had ideas and Shikamaru did not want to be part of them. "Why you home early anyway?"

"I told them I was going to see my dog."

"…Oh, fuck you."

"I notice you're still sitting on me."

"Cause I'm cold. Once I warm up, I'm kicking your ass."

"Wonderful." His boyfriend was weird. He was loud, he complained, he picked fights with people in shop over bread, but he wouldn't have him any other way.

"What'cha thinking about?" Hidan was staring with those strange eyes.

"Your ugly ass face."

"Ok, I'm kicking your ass right now."

And that is the end of that. Thank you so much to everyone who has read it all the way and sorry this took so long to finish! My friend and I have been playing a lot of DnD and it has taken up too much time :L I also apologise for the fluff, I was just in a very fluffy mood when I wrote this. I don't often reply to reviews because I get caught up in the many random things I do but I do read them all and they always make me smile so thank you so much to everyone who has ever reviewed this fanfic and any of my others :3