Summ.
Roxas never cared what his dad did with his life. Until he fell in love with the boyfriend's younger brother. They're engaged to be married, but will the young lovers stand up for their relationship? I mean it's not REALLY incest!

It is written in first person, chapters switching viewpoints from Axel to Roxas. Axel for odd numbered chapters, Roxas for even numbered chapters.

NOTE: This chapter actually spans the same amount of time as the last one... in twice as many words... plus a speech about sex from Cloud ;D

The next morning I woke up from my first wet dream. It was humiliating, because I felt dirty for having it, and I felt guilty for enjoying it.

After breakfast, I sat on my bed and contemplated what sex would be like with Axel. I suddenly realized halfway through my daydream sex that I was inadvertently rubbing the outside of my pants where my afore-unnoticed erection was enjoying the attention. I yelped and took a cold shower to make it go away before returning to my room.

I started alphabetizing my CD collection that I had acquired over the years from Cloud. When I finished, my mind wandered back to Axel. I felt butterflies in my stomach and suddenly decided to organize by genre instead. And then by color of the case, followed by the last letter in the band name, number of songs per album, alphabetized backwards, and when I had gotten to R, Axel walked into my room.

"Hey, Roxas!"

I smiled at him, putting an album by the Rolling Stones onto the shelf. "Hi, Axel. Good to see you."

"I missed you all night, Roxy," he said as I was pulled into an embrace.

Part of me wanted to say 'I missed you too! I missed that sexy whatever that happened last night! I really enjoyed that!' but I kept my cool. "It's only been a few hours since you left!"

"That's plenty of time for me to miss you!"

I smiled at that and sat him down on the bed, taking my place on his lap as I nuzzled his neck. "I missed you too."

It made me feel special that Axel made excuses to see me whenever he could. He would keep me company when dad went out, and I slept over at his house every so often.

I felt lonely every moment we were separated, and overjoyed when we reunited. Our first kiss was during one of they times I was staying the night, but my dad and Axel's brother went out on a date, leaving us alone in the apartment.

I was looking at the sky as I sat on the windowsill, oblivious to Axel watching me until he came over to open the window and hold me so the night air didn't give me a chill.

I hardly remember how it happened, just that I was swept away by the sweet conversation we had, and when he bent down and claimed my lips in a tender kiss, nothing else mattered. I only registered that Axel was kissing me, and that I was completely and totally head-over-heels for him. I forgot who I was, and where I was, and why I was there. The only thing I knew was Axel and that I longed for him with my entire being. When the kiss broke, I searched his eyes for some sign that he had the same feeling I did.

He replied to my silent question in a soft voice. "I love you, Roxas…"

Everything came back to me at once and I felt my heart soar. "Axel… I love you too… I love you!"

Axel and I began spending nearly every moment we could together. From the first time we met our lives have been entwined completely. I discovered that Axel was quite smug at times, and he put shame to the phrase 'Flattery will get you nowhere' because with Axel, flattery could get you ANYWHERE. But I've never minded that about him. I felt we were a match made in heaven.

We never actually ended up getting into trouble for what we were doing. Axel liked making me vocal when we made out, and it surprised us both that my dad and his brother never found out. We would be engaged in our passionate romantics mere inches away from them, yet obscured from view by a wall or door.

Axel and I weren't discreet. And neither of us would feel guilty being intimate where we could easily be caught. We never were. I had my limits, though, unless Axel persuaded me otherwise… which was fairly easy when it was him. He could simply give me his signature evil smirk that said 'Yeah, we might get in trouble, but that makes it more fun'.

For the most part, he could easily get me to do his bidding, and I didn't even mind. When he took up the reins, I felt safer. I discovered just how insecure I was deep down. If I let Axel have control over me, I would be reassured that everything was taken care of and I didn't need to worry. I noticed that Axel liked when I submitted to him, so I was rarely defiant. I wanted him to want me.

I was willing to give him anything if it would make him happy, and he rarely, if ever, took advantage of that. The only time he would try to get what he wanted but I wasn't comfortable with was sexually. I knew he needed sex, and that he wanted it from me. But I was reluctant. Even if we were lovers, there was still the issue of the indirect incest.

It was clear that we weren't actually related, so it shouldn't have bothered me, I just happened to find my soul-mate in the form of my dad's lover's brother. I loved Axel, and I wanted to fulfill his desires, as well as my own—I was craving to make love as well—but something just didn't feel right.

Whenever Axel attempted to remove my clothing or touch me intimately, I would stop him and say something like "I love you, but I can't do that yet…" and he would stare at me blankly for at least ten minutes, in a daze of rejection, before nodding slowly and saying "Okay."

So I did something I figured I would never do. I went to my dad. Not only had I never asked my dad for advice, I had only approached him on my own twice before, once to say that there was a cat on the porch and I fed it because it was hungry, the second time was when he was working for three days on end and I had to tug his sleeve and inform him that I was starving because he hadn't taken a long enough break to feed me more than once or twice. The other part of this was that I had been six years old when I notified him that I was hungry, and it was only a few weeks after I moved in with him that I found the cat.

Maybe I'll explain more about the cat later. But for now we should focus on what actually happened when I went to talk to dad. I remember that he was sitting on his armchair in the living room with his reading glasses on, holding open a book that he had borrowed from a friend, a play called LOVELESS.

"Dad? Can I ask you something?"

He looked up at me, surprised that I was not only talking to him, but asking him for advice. "Sure thing, Rox. Why don't we go discuss it upstairs? You can sit down on my bed."

I didn't argue. He had agreed to help me, so I wasn't going to make a fuss if dad tried to make it more comfortable, he didn't know yet that my question would most likely make him upset.

We were sitting on his bed, facing each other, and Dad took off the reading glasses and set them down on the nightstand. He looked at me. "What's on your mind, son?"

"I don't want you to be angry at me for asking."

"Roxas, I'm your father. I'm here for you to talk to. You can ask me anything, okay?"

Part of me had strong doubts about that. "I have a question about sex."

That threw my dad off. He wasn't angry, just shocked. I'd had a feeling that he wasn't expecting that kind of question to ever even plant itself into my brain. After recovering from his mental heart attack, dad nodded. He swallowed to try and moisten his suddenly dry throat. "Okay. Alright. That's fine. Shoot."

I almost wanted to smile just at his reaction, burst into giggles at how incredibly funny it was to see my dad flip out like that. Alright, I admit it. I actually did start laughing. This seemed to freak my dad even more, thus making me laugh even more. "Dad—" I giggled. "You just looked so funny, I'm sorry… I knew you wouldn't be expecting it, but you just had a panic attack!" I continued to giggle, and dad growled playfully, grabbing me in a headlock and messing up my hair, laughing along with me. I reached up and messed his hair up too, and we started to teasingly wrestle like little kids. When Dad finally pinned me, a mischievous glint in his eyes as we both gasped for breath, he kissed my forehead.

"I feel like I missed out because you never played with your old man when you were little, Roxas."

"I'm glad I waited! You would have killed me with that headlock!" I jokingly punched him in the arm.

"You're still so cute, Roxas. You look a lot like your mother."

This comment surprised me. I knew that Dad didn't like to mention Mom because it might upset me and he never stopped grieving for her. "Thanks, dad."

He smiled and released me, hugging me for a moment before moving back to his sitting place. "So you have questions about sex, huh?"

"Well, more like one big question…"

"Alright. Go for it, kiddo."

"Well… when you love someone… and they love you back… but they want to have sex and you don't know if you should… If you're in love you should be able to make love, right? Or is it there more to it than that?"

Dad sighed, but not his disappointed sigh, a sigh that I learned I would hear every time I asked dad a question that he has to think about. At some point I caught on that he isn't fond of hypothetical questions. He admitted to me later that he would have been happier if I had just asked him something simple like how gay sex works. Unfortunately, I already knew that. I went to dad for advice, which meant hypothetical scenarios. And he was usually right, even though he took a little while to figure out an answer.

"I mean… if you love them, then you should sleep with them… Shouldn't you?"

"Roxas, it's not that simple. Just because you love someone doesn't make you obligated to have sex if you aren't ready. It's only making love if you both want it and are comfortable with it. You aren't required to sleep with someone just because you love them and they love you. It's a big choice to have sex, and you shouldn't do it until you know that you're fully prepared to face the consequences."

"What consequences?"

He actually told me that he liked this question far more than my other one. "There are a lot of consequences to sex. You could get sick, a girl might get pregnant, you could end up in a lot of pain, or you could see it as an emotional trauma. It really depends. Your first time is precious, because it molds your opinion of sex. It can go very well, okay, or very bad. If it turns out badly it may haunt you for the rest of your life. On the other hand, if it turns out really well then you could really enjoy it and be very happy."

I nodded to show him I was listening, but I did not say anything, because I was pretty sure he wasn't finished.

"Roxas, it's a big responsibility to become sexually active, so make sure you're absolutely certain and you know you're fully ready. Also, make sure that you inform your partner of your virginity. Okay?"

"Yeah. Thanks, dad. I appreciate it. I understand now," I got up and walked to the door when I heard a firm voice call me.

"Roxas," my dad said seriously. "May I ask who exactly you are planning on having sex with?"

I had a feeling he would ask this, so I had an excuse prepared. "Oh, it's not me. When I was over Axel's house we were watching TV and I was confused as to why the character rejected her lover when she loves him so much. Now it makes sense."

Relief washed over his face. "Alright. Remember that I'm always here for you to talk to."

With my dad's advice in mind, I knew exactly what I was going to do. Axel was coming over to watch movies while dad went out to spend the day with Reno, so I would set my plan in motion then.

Thanks, dad. You have no idea what you've just done.

…LOVELESS reference. Maybe I'll put Genesis in the story? As a pointless extra? Well, Genesis is the one Cloud borrowed the book from...

Whether or not the next chapter has sex is up to how many reviews I get!