A/N: Updates may start slowing since the next few chapters are going to be super long (most likely). You probably know where we are in the story now- Rivkin and Somalia. Yikes. Thanks for the reviews and enjoy.

March 2008

My head hurts, Ziva thought, rubbing at the back of her neck. She willed the headache that threatened to overtake her thoughts to fade away. You did not feel pain if you did not let it hurt. She opened her eyes to study the two-way mirror into the black site's interrogation room. She tapped the side of the headset she wore. "Yael, back off, you're pushing him too far," she said. She blew out a hard breath when the young Mossad officer did not listen, applying too much pressure and then the suspect was slumped forward in the chair. Ben kalev, she swore. Son of a bitch. "Is he dead?" she demanded.

The young officer merely shrugged. "He killed children," she said, staring with disgust at the suspect. "I do not care if he is dead."

"Well he may still have information we need on his co-conspirators. Wake him up." It made her sick sometimes, what they did. She used to be young Yael in there, fresh from training and wanting to use all the lethal skills she learned and excelled at. She threw the headset off and walked out of the room, making her way down the hallway to her office. She was normally the co-lead on her kidon unit, but she had elected to take the supervisory position in Be'er Sheva to get some rest from the pain and torture they went through. And enacted. She needed a break.

She dropped the files in her hands on the desk, lifting her head when Malachi walked in, leaning against the door. "What?" she asked.

"You have a phone call. It came in from the Embassy."

"Which Embassy?" She felt her heart thudding, reaching for the receiver. There had been some chatter, she'd received a call from one of her sources. They found the body of La Grenouille. Her father had been upset they couldn't have found him alive, since the sheer knowledge that the arms dealer had could probably help dismantle entire weapons networks in their country. What her father didn't know was how close she was to someone who had been one of the last to see the dealer alive.

"Which one do you think? They say she would not leave, demanded to speak to you, whether it be through video or telephone. Rivkin has her in an office, he's on the phone for you." Malachi nodded to the phone, his voice quiet. "Tread carefully Ziva. Remember who you work for."

That was not the first time one of her teammates, men and women who should trust each other with their lives and did on a daily basis, doubted her loyalty to her country. I bleed for the State of Israel, she thought, lifting the phone up and punching the button to take it. "Officer David."

It was not the person she thought it would be. "Officer David, this is Special Agent Todd. I need to talk to you and really wish it wasn't through a government phone. Are you in D.C.?"

If it was Kate calling, that meant they'd taken Tony. She stared straight ahead, trying to keep nonchalant. "I am afraid not, unless you want to make the trip to Israel. It's only a short 10-hour plane ride away."

"I don't have time to joke with you or fly to Israel, I need your help." Kate paused. "It's for Tony, otherwise I would not be asking. Believe me, I have no love lost for your agency."

Ari was rogue, she thought, mindlessly filled with hatred for their father, doing anything he could to ruin the man. It was not my agency. Kate would not listen and she never believed she would. She released a long breath and sank down into the chair at her desk. "I am listening," she murmured. She also wished they weren't having this conversation via their phone systems.

Kate's voice quickened, as if the faster she spoke and got out her request, the faster she could escape the Israeli Embassy and get back to actually helping. She was matter-of-fact. "Tony has been arrested for the murder of Rene Benoit. The guy's daughter, the woman that Tony had been seeing while undercover in an attempt to get close to La Grenouille, she's lying. Says he did it, she's being difficult. She's angry and she wants revenge on him for hurting her. Can't say I blame her, I mean he was pretending to be in love with her for a year just to get to her father. Anyways, you and I both know Tony didn't kill anyone. I have no idea who did, but do what you have to do to help him out of this." She paused, her voice dropping to a tight whisper. "I would not be asking you for help if I did not think you could do something about this. Director Shepard said it was good to have a David in your corner. So we're asking you for help this time." She waited another moment. "Gibbs is here too. Do you want to talk to him?"

No, she would speak to Gibbs another time. She reached to press a finger to her temple. This headache would not go away now. "I will see what I can do," she said, choosing her words carefully. Never promise anything. Her heart thudded harder. "Is Tony alright?"

"Oddly he's fine, this isn't the first time he's been accused of murder."

I will have to discover what happened the first time, she thought with a slight chuckle. She nodded and reached for a notepad, scribbling notes to herself. "I will not call you. We will not speak again. Go back to the office and tell no one you spoke with me. Not even Abby."

"What are you going to do?"

"What I do," she said with another soft chuckle. "Goodbye Kate." She disconnected and then hit another button on her phone, lifting her head and smirking when Malachi barged back into the office. He was fuming with anger, as he should, given what she'd done. It would do nothing to dispel the rumors of her loyalty, but it had to be done. She acted like nothing was the matter, gathering her things. "Hello Malachi, how are you?"

"You stopped the recording devices. We have no record of that call."

She shrugged, swiping the notepad and shoving it into her jacket pocket. "Must have been a glitch." She breezed by him, taking her bag with her. I will not be back, she did not have to bother to say, hurrying out of the office and up to the surface, emerging in the hot Israeli sun. Her car was parked up on the curb and she jumped into it, dialing a number on her phone as she spun away, heading to the highway and towards Jerusalem. The phone rang only once and she spoke her authentication passcode, allowing her to reach a direct line.

It rang once again. "Shalom neshema," a gravelly voice said through her phone speaker. He chuckled, a low rumble, like the bear her father was. "To what do I owe the pleasure of your phone call? I thought you were not speaking to me right now?"

"I am not not speaking to you, I just have not called you."

"You need something, yes? Why else would you call your Abba? You should come to Shabbat dinner tomorrow, my Ziva."

It was only the two of them now, all members of their family long gone. She had not had Shabbat dinner with him since her mother was alive and all five of them had been together. She did not imagine she could ever sit through another Shabbat dinner with her father again, especially not with the two of them. "I am busy tomorrow night. I need to speak with you, do you have time this afternoon? I am on my way to Jerusalem."

"Come pray with me." Then he disconnected. She sighed hard. Of course he would do something like this. Just another means of trying to get their old family traditions back into their lives. She pressed her finger hard on her phone, tossing it to the side and hitting her head back against the headrest. The Mini she had transported to Tel Aviv when she first returned zipped quickly through the cars on the highway and at a few points she took the shoulder to avoid traffic jams.

It did not take her long then, to throw her car into park in a very random free space in a public lot near the heavily populated and traversed area of Jerusalem. She pushed her sunglasses up on her nose and threw her jacket on to cover the gun on her hip. She took one of her favorite scarves, a black and gold one, and tied it tight over her hair. It did not take long for her to walk with the hoards of people, tourists mostly taking advantage of how close to the beginning of Passover and Easter it was, and slipped by them entering the metal detectors, showing her Mossad credentials to bypass. She shoved her hands in her pockets, slowly making her way to the massive wall, her heart fluttering each time she came here.

Since she could not go with her father, she approached it on her side, wondering when the last time she came here was. Probably after they buried Ari. There was a spot towards the side, where the wall separating the men's and women's side was, where she was able to press her hands against the stone and touch her forehead against it, closing her eyes. She mouthed the prayer in Hebrew and then closed her eyes tighter. A face swam into her thoughts. Smirking and laughing at her. Making fun of her English. He was sitting in an interrogation room probably, she thought, opening her eyes briefly. "Help me do this," she breathed.

Do this for him, she thought, but did not speak. She closed her eyes tighter and quickly sent a prayer for her sister, wherever her spirit may be, and stepped away. As she turned, she saw through a gap in the barrier, spying her father walking away from the wall. He could see everyone and everything and sure enough he saw her, even through the game, and smiled. Maybe he could not actually see her, but sense her, and she sighed. Best get this over with. They both left their respective sides and she approached him carefully in the plaza, both walking slowly away from the Wall. "Are you going to give your Abba a hug?" he asked.

She lifted her head to him and sighed, reaching to wrap her arms around him. He chuckled and kissed the top of her head. "I need a favor," she said. It would be something he would certainly collect on, but she needed him to do this. He was the only one she could think of in such a short time who would be able to help this. She hesitated and then took her sunglasses off so she could see him without the veil. I am here Abba, asking you, she thought. The tinted glasses he wore to stave off eye problems hid his emotions from her, but right now she did not need to know how he felt. He needed to see her right now. The need she had. "There is…one of the NCIS agents I worked with…"

"Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo, Junior."

It should not surprise her he knew, but she didn't have time to hide the surprise on her face, her mouth falling ajar slightly. She closed it quickly. "Yes," she said. "Yes Tony."

"Ah, Tony is he? A good Italian name that is, DiNozzo…I believe I met an Anthony DiNozzo awhile ago, in Switzerland…charming man, I believe this one is also charming? Of course he is, to have made such an impression on my Ziva." What she could see of his gaze was intense. He was drilling through her now, reminding her who had the power as she came to him begging for help. He folded his hands in front of him. "You want me to do something? To get him out of this predicament?"

"He did not kill Rene Benoit, you and I both know that," she said.

Eli cocked his head slightly, smiling with bemusement. "I do, do I?"

"Yes, you do." She was not in the mood to play her father's mind games. This was hard enough as it was. Her voice tight, her hands in fists at her side, she growled up at him. "Tony did not kill him. He is being accused of it, I do not know what you have or where you can get it, but I need something to clear his name. I do not care who really killed Benoit, I just want him out."

Eyes narrowed. He chuckled again and looked up and out at the crowds around them. They just looked like a father and a daughter arguing, perhaps over where to go next after they toured the Holy Land sites. He then smiled again. "I believe I know what I can do to help you."

A jolt of surprise had her standing straighter. "Yes?"

"Yes. There is a CIA agent who was working with Benoit. Trent Kort." He chuckled again and lifted his eyebrows up over the frames of his glasses. "I have something I believe he might be curious to know about. Let me handle this Ziva." He paused again and reached for her shoulder, wrapping her closer towards him. "You know I understand your hesitation to come to Shabbat dinner, but perhaps instead of that, we can have Seder together this year?"

That did not take long for him to lifted the knife to her throat. She heaved a sigh and nodded. When she was a little girl, Seder was Tali's favorite. Of course Eli knew that. He also knew they had not had one together since Tali was killed. They attended Seder at other people's homes, but never in their own together. She tossed her dark curls from her eyes and nodded again. "Fine."

"Excellent!" he beamed. He pulled her against his chest again and kissed her head. "Hmm, my Ziva. It is so good to see you. I would like you to come to the office next week, yes? We shall have tea and discuss where your Abba would like to see you. I have some ideas." I am sure I will find them riveting, she thought, glaring up at him with frustration. Of course she could not say anything now, not after what he was doing for her. He chuckled again. "Ah, DiNozzo. Italian. Do you love this man?'

She shot him a dark look. "Excuse me?"

"I suppose not, but you respect him?"

"He was a good agent when I was there." We tend to cross paths from time to time. She pursed her lips again. "You do not believe me."

"Ziva you are a beautiful young woman, he is an arrogant American police officer." He made a face. "Italian. Catholic. I should hope you do not think to bring him home. I am not getting any younger, I would like to see grandchildren one day. They will not be half-Catholic."

To her knowledge Tony had no religion other than NCIS and the cinema. She did not even dignify her father's comment regarding grandchildren or her relationship with Tony with a response. They walked along and out to the street, where there was a black bullet-proofed SUV already waiting for her father, several men and women she had seen around him at the Wall finally emerging from the crowds to give themselves away as a protection detail. She looked back up at her father and swallowed her pride, lifted her chin, and whispered. "Toda."

He chuckled again and kissed her cheeks, giving her a quick hug. "I will see you next week."

Very well, she thought, watching him climb into the SUV with the rest of his detail. She followed his SUV as it disappeared into the traffic and turned away. She returned to her Mini, got back on the road, and a couple hours later was back in her small apartment in Be'er Sheva. Her father owned a farmhouse nearby, with an olive grove, where she was born. She contemplated going out to it and then thought what the hell. She had a key. It didn't take long to get there, but it felt like it was in another world. The only place where she could be completely alone and stay hidden from the world. Maybe I will retire here one day, she thought, dropping her bag on the floor as she stood in the entryway.

She flicked on a light and tugged her jacket off, setting it on the back of the couch, and took her phone from her pocket. It had been enough time since she saw her father leave. She took a deep breath and punched in a number, lifting it to her ear. It rang only once. "Gibbs."

"Hello Gibbs."

"Ziver."

She smiled wide, missing the nickname he bestowed on her when she had been working there. "Um…" she raked her fingers through her hair, aware that it was not a secure line. She cleared her throat. "I spoke with someone who might be able to help. I do not know how long…"

"Tony's out. Trent Kort took responsibility for killing Rene Benoit."

What? Wasn't he the CIA agent? She squinted, shaking her head slightly. "Um…Kort?"

"Yes."

The functional mute, Tony called him. She nodded, understanding she would not get the full details. It didn't matter to her anyway. It meant her father came through and Tony was released. She sighed again, quiet. "I am glad it all worked out."

"Why are you calling Ziver? Just to find out Tony was released?" He was playing a part, knowing that she had to save face if someone was listening. He chuckled, quiet. "What did you have to give up?"

She sank into a chair by the door, looking straight out at the desert nighttime, which blanketed her in darkness. The only light came from the small dim lamp in the corner and the stars overhead. She closed her eyes tight. "It is nothing. It was worth it. I am glad he okay. Please tell them hello for me." She paused again, listening to his soft breathing for a moment. It was comforting. She missed him, Gibbs. Even when he was angry with her, he never held it against her. He was more of a father to her, the year she had been there working with him, and the off times she saw them these past couple of years, than Eli David was. Holding her friend's future over her head just to get her to spend time with him. Did Eli know that that was what it was? Or did he think he was just doing what needed to eb done to get his daughter to spend time with him? Hell, he did not even realize how wrong it all was.

Gibbs cleared his throat. "You need anything else?"

"No," she whispered. She dug the toe of her boot into a knot in the wooden floor. "Good night Gibbs."

"It's morning here."

She knew she didn't wake him. He didn't sleep, much like her. "Leila Tov," she whispered, smiling when he just chuckled and disconnected. She stared at the phone again and then thought against it. She set it on the table beside her and hung her head in her hands, relief filling her and forcing her shoulders to slump. Thank you, she thought, hitting her head back against the wall, her eyes fluttering shut. She smiled to herself. Tony said the last time they met that they only stayed in contact when she needed something. "You owe me," she said to no one.

The universe did not reply, but she hoped one day it would pay her back.

May 2008

When they were in Cairo, she promised Jenny she would go to her funeral. It was part of a deal they made if they got out alive from a rather bad shootout and car chase with terrorists. They'd been holed up inside an abandoned restaurant, ironically, running low on ammunition and laughing together like it was an everyday occurrence to be running for your life. She said something about how she was not going to die in a dirty Cairo alleyway, it was not befitting of a Mossad officer. At least it was a shootout. Jenny said she would make sure that if she were killed beside her, at least it would be in a decent location. That's when she said that she'd go to Jenny's funeral if she got killed, so long as Jenny would go to hers. They shoot on it. Black humor to diffuse the emotions and tension.

I promised her, she thought, shoving her sunglasses on as she climbed out of the rental vehicle, walking towards the graveside service. The official news report said Jenny died in her home, in a fire. That was an obvious lie. There was a coverup that's how you always covered up or faked your death. It was her plan, if she ever had to do that. After calling around, she determined Jenny was not in fact faking her death, although it was a coverup. She did not care what NCIS was doing hiding the reason for Jenny's death, so long as she died a good one. It had been a shootout, she'd learned. That was how she'd want to go out at least. Then it hurt her, knowing the truth. Jenny was really gone. She booked a ticket to Washington, D.C. right afterward.

As she walked up the grassy embankment where the private graveside service was to be held, she saw Tony look over from where he had been standing with Kate, Tim, and Abby. She smiled slightly and walked towards him. "You didn't tell me you were coming," he said softly, reaching to give her a kiss on the cheek in greeting. She gave him a tight hug, her fingers lightly dancing over his shoulders. It was strange how close they were when they never saw each other or really even spoke. They had a connection, she supposed, as annoying as he was. She missed him. She only realized it when she saw him.

"I promised her I would come to her funeral, when we were in Cairo." She could explain it to him later. She smirked at his frown. "It is a long story…I can tell you some other time." She paused and then lifted her eyes to his, whispering. "We will have a drink and I will tell you."

He didn't say anything; he was shadowed, there was a darkness over him. They may have been at a funeral, but he was carrying something heavy in his heart. She made sure to remember that, before turning to everyone else. "Ziva, so good to see you despite the circumstances," Tim said, giving her a hug. She stepped aside and even Abby and Kate, despite their distrust, greeted her warmly. It was like being with a family, she thought, moving to stand beside Tony again. Gibbs stood to the side, alone. She wondered what was going through his mind. Jenny had not been forthcoming about him after she became NCIS Director. There had been someone, Ziva knew there was someone she was close with once before. It sounded like it could have been Gibbs. Guess I will never know, she thought, moving aside.

The service began and she continued to stand, watching solemnly as people listened to the priest speak. She dropped her hand to her side and felt her fingers brush over Tony's. After a moment, she felt his hand tentatively reach for hers and stop. It is okay, she thought, reaching for him too and squeezed lightly. They held hands loosely for a moment before he let go after another comforting squeeze. She took a deep breath and waited while everyone lined up to give the coffin one last touch, word, or drop a flower atop it. She moved to stand beside it and pressed her hand, closing her eyes, and murmured a quick prayer in Hebrew. Jenny what did you do, she wondered, moving away.

There were so many questions and no time. She caught Tony's gaze and walked away to her car, feeling him move to catch up to her. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Gibbs's slight frown in their direction. I am not stealing him away, she thought with a slight nod to him. She had to talk to him anyway. "Who is your new director?" she asked, as they returned to their cars. She knew everyone would be returning to the office. There would be no, what was the saying? Snow on their parade? Or was it rain? Either way, she would not intrude in their grief anymore than she already had, just fulfilling her promise to a friend.

"Headed up the San Diego office, he's a ball-buster," Tony said.

"Ball buster?" She wrinkled her nose. "Why would he do that?"

"Figure of speech."

She did not understand Americans sometimes. Or maybe it was all the time. She leaned in to give him another quick kiss on the cheek. "I am staying at my old apartment," she said. She did not give it up when she returned to Israel. It was something she had never done before, but she couldn't seem to say goodbye to it. It was probably the only place she'd allowed herself to feel like she was at home while working. "If you want to catch up."

"I have to talk to you," he whispered.

"Talk about what?"

"Not here." He nodded towards the grave, where Gibbs was watching them both like a hawk. He gestured to her car. Ah, I see, she realized. "I'll see you later."

"Goodbye." She watched him walk away and narrowed her gaze on his retreating back, curious. She opened the car door and slipped inside, reaching to put her key in the ignition when there was a light tap on the window. Without flinching, since she knew he would be approaching, she lowered the window and smiled. "Gibbs."

"You came," he said. It sounded like an accusation.

"I owed it to a friend."

He nodded, but said nothing, still staring down at her. She hoped his 'gut' wasn't telling him anything beyond the fact that she was there to see a friend off. Despite her personal reservations and curiosity over Jenny's death and the reasons for hiding it from the world. He looked around and then knocked on the edge of the window, quiet. "We need to talk."

She pursed her lips and nodded. "I will see you in a few minutes." She would go to his house, see what he was building in the basement now. Last time it had been another boat. He barely tilted his head 'no.' She looked over to where everyone was piling back into Tony's car. I see, she thought, nodding. Guess she would be going to the Navy yard after all. She rolled the window up as he left and pulled quickly from her space, speeding off and cutting off Kate and Tony, who were driving too slow out of the cemetery, and headed towards the Navy Yard. This should be very interesting.

Roughly thirty minutes later, she found herself in the new NCIS Director's office, before she could speak to even Gibbs and Tony, the brusque man looking her straight in the eye. She got the impression this was what did Tony call him? The ball buster. Yes, she could see that now as she stood with him. "Ms. David. I know your father, we go way back."

Enemy or friend? Eli David did not have friends, so she guessed it had to be enemy. She cocked her head, her eyes narrowing slightly. She did not trust anyone who claimed to go back with her father. "Yes."

He smiled, but there was no warmth behind it. There was calculation. "Your friendship with Director Shepard allowed you unfettered access to NCIS and its systems while in the role of so-called Mossad liaison. I understand the concept of keep your friends close, but that is too close for me despite going way back with your father." He looked to Gibbs. "I know your role as Mossad liaison was terminated at least two years ago but you still come and go too often for my liking. You will turn in any accesses, badges or otherwise, you may have on your person when you leave this building. If you need to work with NCIS, you go through proper channels and not via your relationships with the Director and…" Vance gazed pointedly at Tony, who just stared straight back. "Other agents in this office."

How did he…she shook her head but said nothing. There was an access badge she had, but rarely used. She could still get into their systems but that was because she was a very good officer. McGee could get into Mossad's systems if he felt like it, nothing was locked down. "Yes," she said, nodding. "Okay." The idea of not being able to just walk in here…she felt something clench inside. It was just a job. It meant nothing. "Very well."

"We're done here, you can leave. I still need to speak to the rest of my employees."

She glanced over at Tony, who just shrugged and Tim who seemed apologetic. Kate just seemed glad she would be leaving. She didn't look at Gibbs, but dropped the badge they gave her to use when she was out on assignment with them, along with the ID card that allowed her into the parking garage and building. She turned and left the office, going downstairs, where Abby was pacing in the bullpen. "Oh my gosh! Ziva!" She hurried over and grabbed her shoulders. "What is going on? I saw all of you go up there and we're desperate for info."

"Vance is known for shaking things up," Ducky said. "Is he up there reassigning everyone?"

"I think he may be, he just removed me from NCIS permanently," she said.

"What? But you're…you're practically family!" Abby exclaimed.

Jimmy shook his head, fretting. "This doesn't seem good at all."

I need answers, she thought, looking up as the team began to trickle down the stairs, all looking numb. Gibbs gave her a look and then shook his head. "Forget it." She guessed it didn't matter, whatever he wanted to tell her. She looked at Tony, who had sunk into his chair, unblinking.

"What's wrong with him?" Abby demanded.

"We've been reassigned," McGee said.

Kate looked over at them. Her face was ashen and she kept shooting quick, apologetic looks in Tony's direction. "I'm Senior Field Agent now."

"Cyber Crimes for me," McGee sighed.

But wait…she seemed to have done the math faster than the others. If Kate was Senior Field Agent, that meant…it hit everyone else at the moment she looked to Tony, who released a howl of horror, shoving his face into his hands. "Agent Afloat! I hate boats!"

"You're a Navy cop!" Kate exclaimed. She was trying to sound exasperated, but she just seemed as upset as everyone else. "Come on Tony, you'll be fine! Think of it as a new experience to lead. You'll be the only cop on the entire ship!"

Agent Afloat? She squinted. Was that another idiom? "What does that mean?" she asked. She thought she'd heard it before.

"It means I report to the USS Seahawk tomorrow morning," Tony snapped, scrubbing at his hair. He looked positively miserable about it all. His words bit out as he began to slam things around his desk. "And spend six months on a floating city with thousands of smelly sailors. Ugh." He looked up at her. "It's not what I signed up for when I took this job."

That did not seem to make sense to her as he was ultimately a police officer for the US Navy. Which had ships. So he would have to serve there one day, she thought. Tony did have different thought processes than most of them though. She reached over to pat at his shoulder in comfort, but Kate and Tim and Abby were already comforting him. I do not belong here, she thought, moving away from them. They may feel like family but at the end of the day the only reason she was here was because of Jenny. Because she had grown close to some of them. One in particular.

They may think it was to have a contact and maybe it was, but Tony had wormed into her life. She would have to speak with him later, or maybe not at all. She would find out about Jenny soon. Leave him to his friends, she thought. His family. In the mayhem over Tony's sudden departure and the upset in their dynamics, as well as their general grieving for Jenny, she moved away and walked towards the elevator, stepping in and pressed the button for the first floor. As the doors closed, a hand shot out and pushed them open. She lifted her head, watching Gibbs enter. He was silent and punched the doors shut. They closed with a ding and then he immediately pulled the emergency stop.

As the lights went off, the dull emergency lighting filled the space. He turned to her, his face traditionally impassive. This was no exception. "I am sorry about Jenny," she said quietly. She felt guilty all of a sudden for intruding. She rubbed at her temple. "I came for the funeral…it is a long story but I owed it to her." She wondered if he would tell her the truth. She glanced in his direction. "And I seem to have found myself in a bit of a mess now."

Gibbs did not waste time. "Tony uses you for information and you use him."

She turned her head quickly, eyes widening. "Excuse me?"

"That's how sources work. You keep him in orbit and he keeps you in orbit. Do you think you both accidentally cross paths? Jenny." He paused and she saw the pain in his face as he said her name. "Jenny put you in this office as a favor to you, but you got something out of it for your bosses at the end of the day. The missions you guys would meet on…the one in Montreal I found out about over a year ago."

Yes, she thought, staring at him. She swallowed hard. "I do not know what you are talking about."

"Do not…" he paused, his voice deadly soft. "Lie to me."

That would be a horrible mistake. She shook her head slightly, her voice cracking. "I did not do anything wrong with the arms dealer."

"No, but you and I both know what you did." Yes, she thought, thinking back to that. He cocked his head, whispering. "What did you do to get it?"

I had to have Seder with my father, in his apartment, acting like a family. With photographs of her mother and Tali around. None of Ari. None of his shame. She heaved a deep sigh, blinking the prickling sensation from her eyes. "You do not want to know."

"Ziver."

"You called…Kate called and I did what I had to do." She shot him a look to the side, whispering. "For a friend." For you, for Tony…for everyone.

Gibbs shook his head slightly, whispering, genuinely concerned. "Ziva, Tony is not a mark."

"I know!" she exclaimed. She pressed her fingers to her temple. "I know." She looked up at him, shaking her head again. "I am no longer welcome here, your Director made clear of that. I have to return back to Israel. I told you, I came for Jenny's funeral. I owed it to her as a friend and nothing more. There is no other motive for my being here."

He gave her another scan. She must have passed, because he nodded again. "Tony trusts you."

"I had not noticed," she said, truthful. "He seems to enjoy antagonizing me."

"He blames himself." Excuse me, she thought, confused, as Gibbs began to explain, his voice deadly soft. "Tony and Kate were on assignment in Los Angeles on a detail. The past came back and Jenny was killed in the crossfire."

"The past?"

"Doesn't matter." He was abrupt, so she didn't question it. He continued. "You know what its like when you think you got someone killed."

It eats you alive. You find ways to cope. You think of the 'what ifs' so much you start to believe they are true. Until you find out that things aren't how you wished them to be. Poor Tony. "Why are you telling me this?" she asked. Gibbs had always warned them away from each other, disapproving of how close they were beyond just being 'family.' It didn't matter anyway. Tony had Kate. Someone else who was there and understood far more than her. They were partners after all. What could she provide him that he couldn't get from his partner?

"I told you so you had the full truth, as a friend of Jenny's." He reached for the elevator button and pulled it again, rolling his eyes at her. "Could care less about your personal life Officer David."

She smiled again, her voice soft. I guess that is as much as I will ever get out of him. "It is good to see you again Gibbs, despite the circumstances." She paused and then chuckled, walking out the open doors. "If you are ever in Israel, give me a call."

"You'll already know if I'm there."

Yes, she would, she thought with a soft chuckle, walking out to the rental car. She did not have anymore of her accesses to the building, which left her with a sort of emptiness in her heart. This place was comforting to her. The work was different. It was…it was rewarding. You caught bad guys. Put them in jail and helped someone in the process usually. Mossad…she reached to touch at the symbol on her neck. It was so much more than that. The weight of an entire people on your shoulders. The pressure…she released a long sigh, but it didn't help her. She opened the car door and climbed in, pushing every away.

Whether or not Tony would show up, she did not know. Not after all these changes. She drove back to her old apartment, which she had kept despite Mossad's insistence she lose the property. She changed out of the black funeral dress into comfortable cargo pants and t-shirt. She ordered pizza, something she could not always find in good quality in Tel Aviv, and set it on the table just as there was a knock at the door. She ignored the 9mm she left on the end table and checked the peephole, pulling it open to reveal a dejected Tony. "You should be packing."

"Ugh, it doesn't matter." He walked over to the pizza and grabbed a piece, eating it standing up and complaining about Vance's decision through a mouthful of pepperoni and cheese. She watched him eat for a few minutes, watching him. He was full of pent up energy. He seemed ready to pounce. She lifted her chin and kept watching him. "What?" he demanded. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Gibbs believes that I use you for your connections," she said.

He lifted his eyes. "You don't?"

She scowled. How could they think that? After this time? "I do not," she said, her voice cool. "Do you?"

He looked up again and then back down at the half-eaten pizza slice in his hand. He tossed it back into the box, wiping his hands on the napkins she had laid out. "What are we even talking about Ziva?"

We are talking about…about nothing anymore, she thought, closing her eyes. She opened them and looked at him again. Regardless of what Gibbs thought, she did not use him the way they may have thought. Just like he did not use her the way they probably would have trained him to do. "You did not do anything to get Jenny killed no matter what you think." Blurting it out was the best way to address it.

He stopped mid-chew and then swallowed, looking over at her. "What are you talking about?"

I am not speaking Hebrew, she thought, scowling. "I am talking about how you are not at fault for whatever happened to Jenny, no matter what you think." She looked him straight in the eye, whispering. "Gibbs told me what happened."

"Why would he do that?" he snapped.

"Because she was my friend."

"Yeah? Well she was our friend too, our boss, and we were there protecting her. You were off somewhere in Israel doing whatever it is you do over there." He was lashing out, angry at the way things were going, she thought. Rationally at least. She was also irrational and just as pissed at his reaction when she was only trying to help. He read her mind and laughed. "Don't try helping me Zi-vah!"

She glared at him. How dare he? She was only trying to help a friend. "You know this is precisely why we could never work together!" She swore in Hebrew and then railed at him in her native tongue, throwing her hands in the air as he shouted at her about how she was always gone, secretive, he couldn't trust her, in fact he didn't trust her and that's why he was always keeping tabs on her. She yelled that he was an idiot, who cared more about movies than real life, how he thought he was so funny but in reality he was a giant child who had severe issues and what kind of a person was that?

After yelling at each other in two different languages for the better part of an hour, she finally threw her hands down to her sides and stared at him. "What are we doing?" she demanded. They were acting like children. Petulant children, shouting at each other over things that could not be helped. Yes, she was Mossad, which meant she disappeared from time to time. Yes, hew as a federal agent who preferred to shoot first and ask questions later, but at the end of the day they trusted each other. That's why they stayed in contact. They both knew it.

"We're yelling."

"Why?"

"Because we can," he said. He shook his head again and laughed. He reached his hands up to her, shaking the air. He looked like an idiot. "Why the hell are you still in my life?! You showed up when my partner got shot and almost killed and that was for an operation! That was work! You never left! And it is annoying Ziva!"

Why was she always around? He still didn't get that? "Because I like you guys," she exclaimed. She swallowed hard, her voice soft, realizing how that sounded. She shook her head quickly. Regardless of that summer where they spent most nights together, she…she liked them. It was the first time she'd felt like she had a family again. I want something permanent, she thought with a sad look to the photo she took with her everywhere, of Ari, Tali, and herself. She tore her gaze away from it before he could see, before he could put anything together. Her voice dropped to a whisper. This was too personal. It was unacceptable. "It does not matter anymore. I am returning to Tel Aviv. You are going to a ship in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. I guess we may see each other again or we may not it does not matter anymore."

He looked right at her again. That look that told her he was refusing to accept that. Tony had a nasty habit of ignoring things that were right in front of him if he didn't feel like believing them. A prickly feeling crossed her skin and she turned away when he walked over to her. "Hey," he whispered, reaching for her face, turning her towards him. His fingers burned into her cheek. He smiled again, shrugging. "We'll find each other again. I did track you down the first time."

"I let you," she whispered. She chuckled and reached for his hand, squeezing it quickly. "If we thought you would get in trouble before when I was allowed in your building then I am sure it would be bad now." Not to mention her father's ire when he learned that she'd returned to the same place in the same city and that the American agent was here with her. She smiled again and then rose on her toes, kissing him quickly. "That should keep you for six months."

"Ah…I don't think so," he laughed, tugging her arm and turning her back against his chest, his fingers going to brush her hair from her face. He touched his lips to hers again. She felt like she was on fire. This was getting to be too much. His voice was gravelly. "You want to see my knife?"

They could be fighting and arguing one moment and now this. He was a clown. She knew better though. She laughed, reaching around to his pocket and tugged the switchblade, flicking it up and studying it. There were marks along the side. She squinted and then glared at him, disgusted. "You are not keeping this sharp. You should not own a knife if you cannot take care of it." She flicked it shut and then turned it towards him.

"Well let's see yours then?" She reached to her boot and whipped out one of her favorites, tilting it towards him. He looked at her boot and then at her again, his eyes wide. He was so shrill, she thought with an irritated look. "You keep that thing with you when you're just wandering around your apartment?"

She smirked. "Well you never know." She slept with a gun beneath her pillow too. Something he'd learned when they were undercover the first time. She reached into his pocket again and slowly removed his phone, looking at it. There were several missed calls from Kate. The real partner. The real family. She turned it towards him, whispering. "You should go say goodbye to your partner."

He frowned at her. "What about you?"

What about me? "I will be fine, I have a flight in the morning." Then it was on to somewhere, some mission. The last word she'd heard was she would be sent to Morocco. She wished she could stay in Paris. She loved Paris. She reached up to give him another quick hug. "Do call if you need anything."

"Take care Officer David," he said, giving her a quick smile. They stared at each other for a brief moment and then she moved at the same time as him, grabbing his lips with hers in a searing kiss. It did not last long, because she wasn't sure she'd be able to hold on very long anyway, her fingers gripping at the back of his head as his dove through her curls, her neck bent back as she pulled him against her. A moment passed and very slowly they broke away, eyes opening slowly. She quirked her lip in a smile, mimicking his. "We'd never be good together," he whispered. "Hate each other too much."

I concur, she thought, kissing him one more time. "Goodbye." He smiled again and just waved, reaching for his phone and pressing it against his ear, calling Kate. She smiled and watched the door close with a click. Well then. She waited another moment and gathered everything together, throwing it into trash bags and taking them out to the dumpster. She grabbed her photo, the small bag she traveled with, and turned out the lights, closing and locking the door behind her.

The following day, she was landing in Tel Aviv, to receive her next assignment, with the assurances to her father that Washington, D.C., and NCIS were behind her. "And any other distractions?" he warned. He cocked his head, chuckling. "Because I need you focused on this Ziva." And whatever Eli wanted, Eli got, she thought darkly.

"No distractions," she whispered. She meant it too. Everyone back in Washington, D.C. could stay there. Including the biggest distraction of them all.