Anna wasn't fooled, and she never really ever was fooled by Elsa, when Elsa quite obviously was straining to remain poised and calm when she bid Anna away for the next two hours. Anna was just excited and sad, a terrible combination really. She only had two hours left to spend with Kristoff before setting off to a far away kingdom. Okay, so Germany isn't /that/ far away, but still. It's like a million bazillion miles away, if you're in Anna's head.
But, Elsa wasn't the only thing she was worried about. Don't you be fooled for a moment that she didn't also fret every moment she was alone by herself that they were going to sail to Germany. Get on a boat, a vessel, a ship. Call it what you will, it was the vehicle that involuntarily felled her parents at sea in a massive storm. Anna, as you should know by know, is full of life and spirit. You can't really see her facade because she never lets on that she's wearing a mask in the first place. The only person who really pointed it out to her was Hans all that painful time ago, but still she never changed. She wasn't about to let it be known to anyone, especially her big sister, whom she knew had to be terrified about the ordeal too, that she was afraid to get on the ship. That she was afraid the past would repeat itself rather too soon.
Kristoff didn't feel anything off with Anna, and neither did anyone else actually. Wilbur, Gerda, Kai, Helga, no one, no one at all noticed. No one noticed her eyes always flickering to the clocks around the room. They all knew Elsa was shaken and that she probably didn't want to be bothered. They figured she just needed to be alone. Well, they figured wrong of course, but anyways they stayed with the ever sociable Anna for better or worse, which for Elsa's case was worse because she did not want to be alone, and if it wasn't for the tick tocking of the clock resounding in her study hypnotizing her into submission she would've stayed with her sister, but she didn't and there's no changing that.
"No, no, I want to go alone."
"W... Wh- Alone?" Kristoff felt beside himself at Anna's rare words. He dropped his arm away from her shoulders and stopped in his tracks but Anna kept on walking towards the exit of the room that felt more and more crowded by the moment despite there only being a handful of people in it. The thing to Anna was that she just wanted to be with one person in particular and that made it stifling to be in a room full of the wrong people.
She didn't stop as Kristoff kept calling out to her and he didn't pursue her much. Now he felt something was off and he knew Anna well enough to know what it had to be as he watched her stride off on a detour before she went to the docks. He knew where she was going. He was a lot to her and like wise vice versa, but he could never be her older sister.
"I love you Anna"! He shouted out in a last ditch effort though, which didn't make it any less heartfelt. He just wanted her to look back at him.
And she did. She turned her face back and smiled and replied, "And I love you Kristoff." All without missing a step, she didn't even stumble a little over her feet like Kristoff thought she would. She was seriously intent on her tiny mission enough to finally gain a proper sense of balance to stay light on her feet long enough to reach her destination.
She went on through the the castle, passing by all the portraits of deceased relatives and cringed harshly as she sprinted by her parents portrait. Tears stung at her eyes and her chest constricted like a black hole sucking all the airy light out of her and so she didn't sprint very long at all, but she made it at least thirty feet away from the painting before she felt like she was almost going to faint. She felt her knees give under her from the strain of the stress of sort of confronting the painting and she fell down to the soft, worn down carpet beneath her, as tears fell unnoticed from her eyes. She didn't know she was crying and she wondered why her vision was so blurry for a moment. Blood rushed into her head, practically filling any open space, it felt like her whole body lit on fire from the panic the painting caused. She couldn't hear anything except her heartbeat. It was heavy like a hot, muggy, summer afternoon.
"Anna?! Are you alright?"
Elsa bent down on her knees after shaking Anna's shoulders wasn't doing anything to rouse her. She took her sister's face in her hands and lifted it up and saw the most peculiar sight. Hot tears were streaming down Anna's face and singed Elsa's freezing hands, but Anna's chest was still, her whole body was still, and her breath was calm.
"Hey, it's going to be alright." Elsa knew that expression anywhere, Anna was simply having a panic attack, an externally calm one, but that didn't hide the tempest of pain raging inside her little sister. No, not to her.
That's because the same tempest was raging inside her as well.
"Come on, let's get you off the floor." A sudden rush of hope filtered it's way through the vortex of emotions and Elsa felt much better at the realization of this distraction. She could focus on making sure Anna got through her attack instead of making sure she got through her own. It would calm them both down, she was sure. You can't not feel thirsty when watching others drink, not even when you're floating in an ocean of rain.
Elsa lifted Anna up by her arms and dusted off her dress, smoothing out any wrinkles.
"Are you okay? Do I need to fetch a doctor?" Elsa held Anna's hands, and Anna tried to focus on how cold they were.
"No. I'm- I'm fine. Or at least I will be soon enough. I just need- need some-" Anna said breathlessly.
"Air, yes. Calm down a little, just take a big breath. It'll all be alright, you'll see. There you go. That's it." Elsa quieted, and let Anna catch her breath in peace.
"Now tell me, would you like to return to your room or stride onto that ship without a care in the world?" Elsa asked as she tried to get Anna walking. She figured it was something like what Anna would say. It sounded spacious and full of opportunity, although only two choices were given.
"First, you tell me," Anna's voice was a little weak from her panic before, but she continued, "would you like to return to your room or do you want to stride onto that ship without a care in the world. I know you're just as terrified."
"Yes, yes I am. I've been putting off the fear, but maybe I need to accept that this time something is different." Elsa felt ready to share what she had spent some time thinking about since that night she confided her fear of sailing with Georg.
"What's that?"
"I'm going."
"We've established that some time ago sis. I'm over doubting that." Anna let out a tiny chortle.
"No, that's the difference. I've been thinking about more than just how our parents died at sea. I've been thinking about how maybe I can hone in my powers enough to get out of a storm if we happen to go through one."
"Elsa, you can control ice and snow, not the weather."
"I don't control the ice and snow my silly sister. I will it. I willed, quite accidentally, the fjord frozen."
"So... What? You think you can freeze an entire ocean?"
Elsa stopped them in their tracks and had Anna stand before her. Elsa placed her hands on each of Anna's shoulders and looked her little sister square in the eyes.
"I believe that with you by my side, I can do anything. Do you believe in me?"
Anna leaped from the tiny distance between them at Elsa to envelope her in a walloping hug.
"I've never doubted you."
Elsa hugged back strongly and went on to ask again, "So what will it be? Your room or the ship?"
Anna leapt back to see her sister's surprised face and exclaimed, "We've come this far, we can go to the ends of the Earth. I'm sure of it."
One last thought of their parent's ship sinking flitted through her head causing her to pause. Then a vision of them on the ship, gaping up at a massive storm broiling above them, and suddenly a bolt of bright icy fury exploded from beside her and she looked to see her sister beside her. Then she came back to see her sister in front of her.
"To the ship we go. We'll make them proud." Finally, a little glint of light and hope returned to Anna's eyes, and it reciprocated in Elsa's.
"Oh, my dear sister. We already have!"
"Then we shall do it again! And again and again and again! With you by my side, I can do anything. I'm sure of it." Anna declared with an air of finality. Elsa noticed once more just how much Anna was alike from their father. Little deterred him as well.
Hand in hand they went off to the docks. Within minutes they reached the ship. The bridge was down as the crew was finishing the last touches, getting everything on board. Everyone was bustling along, and then when they caught sight of the Queen and Princess approaching they went into over-over drive to make sure everything was pristine and perfect. They puffed out their chest and stood up straight to impress them. They all fixed each other's hats and vests, tucked stray hairs behind their ears, or under their bandannas. But it was all for naught.
Yes, the sun was shining and birds were singing in the crisp summer morning of Arendelle, but what caught the sister's attention past the beautiful, massive sails of their ship was the rising ominous, dark clouds raging on the horizon.
Did you miss me? :(