So far, marriage was to Erna's liking. She had felt profound satisfaction watching her father depart for Alfheim two days after the ceremony. Feeling good and truly free for the first time in her life, she was even beginning to enjoy the reverence with which everyone treated her. Suddenly, people seemed to heed her words more closely and nobody dared ignore her when she spoke. It was a heady feeling and she wondered if she'd ever get used to it. Loki had been raised a prince and expected such behavior from the court, but for her it was like a switch was flipped the moment he'd slipped the ring on her finger.

She was also enjoying finally being able to share a bed every night without fear of someone finding out. As well as they'd known each other before the wedding, it was infinitely more pleasurable now. In the few short weeks since the wedding, they'd made love more times than she could count. Silently she hoped that pregnancy would wait at least a little longer while they had a chance to enjoy each other.

Despite three vigorous rounds that night, Erna found herself awakened from a deep slumber. A jolt of fear shot through her, clearing away the vestiges of a dream. Within seconds all she could really remember was that it had been disturbing. Blindly groping in Loki's direction, hoping for the comfort of his warm body, she was startled to find his side of the large bed unoccupied. Though the curtains were open, the moonless night offered her no illumination as she scanned their chamber for some sign of him.

She tugged a blanket off of the bed and wrapped it around her frame before leaving the safety of the bed. For some reason, an uneasiness had crept in, settling heavily in her stomach. Something just felt wrong and she wanted nothing more than to find her husband.

A quick search told her he wasn't in the adjoining bathroom, nor was he in the small study he sometimes used for work. She let out a sigh of relief when she finally spied his silhouette on their balcony. He must have been deep in thought, visibly jumping when she came up behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist.

Although the night was cool, it wasn't cold, but his skin felt like ice beneath her fingers. "Loki, you're freezing. Come back inside." He was wreathed in shadow, but she could still appreciate the outlines of his lithe, naked body. Surely she could come up with some ideas to warm him up.

Pressing a kiss to his back, she tried to wrap some of the blanket around him, but was thwarted in the attempt when he twisted away from her hold. "Never sneak up on me like that again," he hissed with an unexpected anger.

Confused, she squinted up into the darkness, wishing his face were clearer. He sounded so cross, but surely he was joking with her. "I wasn't sneaking, Loki. You weren't in bed and I got worried."

"You found me. Now go back to bed." If this was a joke, he was taking it too far. He'd never used this tone with her before and she felt her anxiety spike.

"Loki, what's the matter?"

"Nothing!" He was shouting now, backing her closer to the doorway with every word. "Do as you're told and go back to bed! Queen though you may be, I answer to no one!" If the light would have been any stronger, she would have noticed the red glint of his eyes as he yelled down at her.

It was as if he'd slapped her, but rather than sadness, a hot anger simmered up. "You brute. Everyone told me it was only a matter of time before you turned on me. But I didn't believe them. I was stupid enough to believe you." She stood as straight as possible, knowing even her full height was unimpressive to someone as tall as Loki, but it felt important she do so all the same. "If you want to be alone, fine!"

Turning, she stalked off the balcony and flung the doors closed behind her. After a moment's hesitation, she decided to lock them as well. He could surely open them with a wave of his hand, but it let him know she didn't want him following her. She threw off the blanket and marched over to her wardrobe. Rather than take the time to light a lamp, she fumbled around in the dark for her riding clothes, knowing it was the only full set of garments she could don without the help of her maids.

She dressed quickly, refusing to give into the urge to look back at the balcony doors. The clothing gave her a measure of comfort, as she didn't feel quite so exposed. Finally, believing herself to be fit to at least leave their chambers, she reached into the back of the bureau and removed her staff. Without a further glance, she left the room and practically sprinted to the stables.

-XXX-

It was almost dawn by the time she'd roused a stable boy and readied her horse. There was no sign of her husband, but she felt an urgency to leave Asgard before he caught up with her. She rode out of the palace's east gate and simply followed the road out of the city, keeping a grueling pace until she was well away from the city. Beyond feeling the need to escape, she had no destination in mind, nor a plan once she got there. This just felt like what she needed to be doing at the moment.

Finally, when she felt the city was far enough at her back, she stopped her colt beside a stream and paused to rest. Sitting on the bank, she felt guilty when she spotted the foam on his flanks. She'd ridden him harder than she normally would and failed to notice how tired he was. Yet another thing to feel awful about, she mused.

The early morning sun was strong and warm as it beat down on them, yet she still felt a chill remembering the night's events. She was so confused over Loki's behavior and now slightly ashamed at her own. Her temper was difficult to manage at the best of times, but something last night had just snapped, something that wasn't exorcised by the rigorous ride alone.

She hobbled her horse, allowing him to drink and graze freely without the worry of him running off, while she searched the forest surrounding the stream. Within a few minutes she found a sapling that would suit her needs nicely. While not as sturdy as a training dummy, it offered a pliability that would hopefully be challenging.

Her hands found their grip on the smooth, strong wood of the staff and her body fell into fighting stance. As vigorous as her sessions with Loki had been of late, her body quickly reminded her how out of practice she was. She may have been able to land blow after blow on the young tree, but her speed was nowhere near what it once was. After several minutes she found herself gasping for air and trying to ignore the sting in her arms and legs. Clearly sex favored the use of some muscles over others.

But the activity helped her mind more than anything, allowing her to simply focus on the task at hand. The sapling offered her no argument as she pummeled it with her staff over and over again. And if she pictured Loki's smug face as she landed the occasional blow, then nobody knew but her.

Lungs and limbs burning, she finally allowed herself to stop as the sun climbed almost to its peak. After drinking her fill from the stream, she collapsed onto the bank, chest still heaving with the exertion. She'd probably be sore for a week after such a punishing session, but she did feel better, as she usually did after training.

"Is this the only talent you've been hiding from me, little elf?" Too tired to move, she didn't even bother to look back and find the source of the familiar voice.

"Not hiding, your majesty," she let sarcasm drip from the title.

"You say your majesty, but I think you mean something else." Gone was the stinging anger from his words the night before. She was happy she couldn't see his face, because the supercilious look he likely wore wouldn't help her already dark mood.

"Oh pardon me. I meant to say volatile rude hateful obnoxious asshole."

He chuckled and she heard him sit down somewhere behind her. "You always do have a way with words."

She didn't answer, unwilling to be drawn into a genial conversation with him so easily. His silver tongue was well known for a reason and right now she wanted to stay mad at him. They sat in silence as her breathing returned to normal. The sun started to burn her face, but she'd be damned if she moved to another position now.

Finally, he spoke again, but with less bravado than before. "Your hasty departure is now the talk of the castle."

"Good."

"Good? How so?"

"Because someone will be brave or stupid enough to ask me about it and I'll be happy for everyone to know the truth."

"Which is?"

"That my husband screamed at me for no reason and made me feel like an imbecile. That somehow he thought it was permissible to take out his ire on me for no fuckingreason. He reminded me that despite his flowery words, I can rely on nobody but myself."

"Erna…"

"What?! Go ahead, Loki. Make your excuses. Turn it around on me so I feel as if I'm the one in the wrong. Do it!" She leapt to her feet and roared the words at him.

She didn't expect the sight before her. He usually took meticulous care in his appearance, knowing how important it was project the proper image. But now he sat before her in faded riding clothes, hair disheveled, and large circles under his eyes.

"I have no excuse for my behavior, Erna. I would never manipulate you like that."

"Ah so you'll just shout at me indiscriminately. Yes, that's much better."

"I have no excuse," he repeated. "But I do have an explanation if you'd like to hear it."

"You came all this way, you may as well tell me."

"You startled me last night."

"I'd gathered that."

"Will you allow me to finish?" She waved a hand at him to continue. "I thought you were sound enough asleep, that I was safe. It was my fault, not yours."

"Safe from what?"

"I… you know the truth of my parentage. I kept the appearance expected of me before I was even able to consciously think about it. I feel more at home in this skin than any other, but sometimes I feel the need to drop the illusion completely. I was in my Jotun form last night when you found me."

"And for that you screamed at me?"

"I'm sorry, Erna, I truly am. I was afraid you would see me like that and I lashed out."

"You couldn't have told me all that last night?"

"I panicked. It wasn't right, but you deserved to know why I acted as I did."

"Well, it's unacceptable. You'll never speak to me that way again."

"Again? You're not leaving Asgard?" The hope that shone from his face erased years from him and gave her a glimpse of the boy he'd once been.

"Leaving? Because we had a fight? No, Loki. I just needed some time alone and it's not proper for me to spar at the palace." She sunk down beside him, body already aching from her workout. A wariness was also beginning to creep in, as the lack of sleep took its toll.

"Who's to tell you it isn't proper? I'm heartened by the fact that my queen can defend herself should the need arise." He seemed in much better humor now that the threat of her leaving was gone.

"The entire court? My father never approved of my staff and the only reason I got away with it is because our master-at-arms liked me and trained me despite my father's wishes."

"You're the queen now, Erna. If you want to practice in the full view of the court it's your prerogative. Or if you want to set up a space for private training, you can do that as well. Personally, I'd prefer the whole of Asgard know the queen can take care of herself."

"You wouldn't be embarrassed by me?"

"Of course not! I'm nothing but proud of you, Erna. I'll stand behind whatever you decide."

"You're just happy I'm not running away."

"I am pleased about that, yes." He smiled, but she caught a fleeting look of fear cross his face. She realized he really had been afraid she'd leave him. "But I promise, I couldn't be prouder to have you as a wife. Even when my actions don't always reinforce it."

"I'm still mad at you," she grumbled and stretched out onto the soft grass.

"And I'm glad of it, believe it or not. I need you to tell me when my behavior is unsatisfactory. You have to push back so I know it won't be tolerated. You're not a pushover with anyone else and I don't expect you to be one for me." He leaned back and lay next to her, clearly as exhausted as she was.

"You really thought I'd leave you over a fight?"

"I've never been married. I don't know how things work."

"You're a dolt sometimes. It's going to take a lot more than some blue skin to chase me away, Loki."

"I've never had a partner like this before and I'm still getting used to it. I am sorry, Erna."

"I know you are. You've apologized and it's done."

"But you're still mad at me?"

"Yes. A little. I don't know if you noticed, but I'm a bit of a hothead. That and what little sleep I did get was interrupted by a terrible dream, so I'm not at my best right now."

"Will you tell me about it?"

"I don't remember much. Just that I was more afraid than I'd ever been in my life. There was fire and chaos and I was terrified."

"And you woke up alone. No wonder you came looking for me. I'm sorry, little one."

She felt beside her and twined her fingers with his. "Thank you."

They watched the sun trace lazily across the sky for several more minutes before curiosity got the better of her. "How did you find me? I didn't even know where I was going. I still don't actually know where we are."

"Enough people saw a rider matching your description pelting down the road that it was relatively easy. When you left the city proper I was able to follow your tracks."

"You didn't send a battalion out to fetch me instead?"

"As angry as you were? No, I had no wish to send any of my men to their deaths."

"Probably a wise choice." Her muscles were starting to stiffen again and she knew she'd have a hell of a time getting up if she stayed there much longer. He watched her intently as she stretched slowly and staggered to her feet. "Now get me home, husband. I have an appointment with a hot bath and a large mug of ale."

"It is my duty to obey."