Go Baby Grow
Chapter 43 – Dashed Hopes
Wednesday, June 10th
As everyone gathered around the breakfast table on Wednesday morning, Amelia was in the kitchen chopping up some fruit. "Start without me," Amelia encouraged. "This is going to take a few minutes."
While she cut the melon into bite sized pieces, Amelia took in a quick breath and immediately put her hand on her baby bump. She set the knife down and sat down on one of the nearby barstools, attempting to breathe steadily. Trying to discern if the baby had kicked really hard or if she was cramping, Amelia waited to see if the pain reoccurred. Moments later, it struck again.
"Owen!" Amelia called out.
"Yeah?" he responded with a bite of food in his mouth.
"Can you come in here, please?" she asked.
"Go help your mom, Buddy," Owen instructed Lucas.
Lucas went to the kitchen. Before he had a chance to speak, he caught a glimpse of his mommy and lowered his eyebrows. He walked up to her and grasped her hand, wondering, "Mommy, why do you kinda look sick?"
"I'm not sure, Monkey," she answered while attempting to smile. "Can you get Daddy?"
Without a word, Lucas ran into the Dining Room and stopped beside Owen.
"Let's not run inside, Luke," Owen reminded him.
Whispering, Lucas shared, "Mommy wants you. She looks grayish whitish."
Owen grabbed the napkin off his lap and stepped into the kitchen. When he saw Amelia, he agreed that Amelia looked washed out and pale. "Mia?" he began as he approached her.
"Something's wrong," she said softly as her eyes caught his. "I'm dizzy and nauseous… lightheaded."
"Let's get you to the floor or to the couch. I don't want you to faint and fall," Owen advised. "Can you make it to the couch?"
"I don't think so," she replied as she closed her eyes and tried to breathe deeply. "Ow… there it is again."
"What?" Owen asked.
"Pain. It's localized. Right in this spot. That's probably the fifth time. It's squeezing. Lots of pressure," she described.
"Lie down on your left side, Mia," he coached calmly. "Have you had any water yet this morning?"
"No. A handful of crackers," she reported.
"Ryder? Can you come in here?" Owen hollered.
"What's up?" Ryder responded quickly, having jumped up from the table as soon as Owen called his name. As soon as he saw Amelia, pale and lying on the floor, he knelt down and rubbed Amelia's upper arm, "Mama Bear, what's going on?"
"Ryder, I need you to grab my med bag from the trunk of the Boxster," Owen instructed. He raced to the garage and brought it back in less than a minute. Owen dug through it, found his blood pressure cuff and threw his stethoscope onto his ears. "Mia, let's get a BP."
Sitting down beside Amelia, Ryder grasped her free hand and squeezed. She squeezed back.
"80/50. I don't like that," Owen mumbled to himself. "Grab Mom a glass of water with a straw. After you set that down, go grab a pillow and blanket for her, please."
"Of course," Ryder nodded. He gathered the items, then sat back down.
"I know you want to sit with her, Ryder, but I need you keeping everything at the table relaxed," Owen explained. After kissing Amelia's hand, Ryder returned to the Dining Room.
"Is Mommy ok?" Lucas asked. Immediately, that started the three girls off on a spree of questions.
"She needs some water and needs to rest for a minute. She's fine," Ryder assured them all, even though he wasn't clear what was happening.
Owen fussed and tended to his wife, summarizing her vitals and weighing in, "I think the sensations are Braxton Hicks. Any back pain? Discharge?"
"Yes and I don't think so," Amelia responded as she pulled her lips into her mouth.
"Let's get you checked out," Owen frowned.
Amelia shook her head, "No, I'll be a sideshow if we go to the hospital. This will pass."
"It's not up to you, Beautiful," Owen smirked as he scooped her up and carried her to the car. "Let me tell Ryder what's going on. I'll be right back."
Owen pulled Ryder aside and asked him to tell the kids that Amelia was riding in with Owen for an already scheduled visit. He promised to keep Ryder informed and thanked him before dashing back to the garage.
When the Chief's family and one of their colleagues needed attention, attendings flew to the bay to respond. Arizona was waiting for the Shepherd Hunts when Owen pulled up. She'd pulled Karev outside with her.
"Do not make a fuss," Amelia insisted clearly as she pushed the gurney away. Frowning, Owen glanced at the other doctors and stayed close to his wife.
Her legs buckled and Owen caught her before she fell. "Now for some fuss," Owen insisted with a fatherly tone as he bore his eyes into Amelia and helped her onto the gurney.
"What's her BP?" Arizona inquired.
"It was 80/50 at home, before she drank any water or stretched out on the kitchen floor," Owen reported.
"Dehydrated?" Arizona guessed.
Owen nodded and concurred, "Likely."
Arizona leaned down to Amelia and repeated all the same questions Owen had already asked. She added another, "How many cramps or bouts of discomfort in the last hour?"
"Six…maybe seven," Amelia guessed as her eyelids flittered.
"She's fainting," Karev noted as they entered a treatment room.
"Let's get a monitor on the baby, then hook up Mama," Arizona ordered. "Chem 25, UA, repeat BP every 15 minutes. Let's get one right now." She added, "Let's get some IV fluids flowing as well."
Nurses and medical personnel swarmed Amelia. Her BP was taken before her blood was drawn and the nurse reported, "78/48."
"Amelia, any headache or blurred vision?" Arizona asked. She shook her head.
"How's her EKG?" Owen inquired.
"You can be in here, but you are Dad right now, Chief. Sally, get the Dad a chair please," Arizona indicated. Owen glanced over at the EKG and tried to catch a glimpse. He studied the monitor screen above him and felt some relief.
Minutes later, Arizona reviewed the chart while they waited for lab results. "Owen, I'm thinking it's a combination of Braxton Hicks, dehydration, and not having eaten. We will watch her to see if she's responding well to the fluids."
"No signs of dilation or thinning?" he checked.
"No and no contractions showing on the baby monitor. The baby's heartrate is steady. If she has another episode like this before the end of the month, I won't feel comfortable allowing her to fly. However, this appears to be isolated and preventable – she needs to increase fluids and eat more than a few crackers before worrying about feeding anyone else," Arizona summarized. "What's your schedule like today?"
"I'm on until 3. Short day," he shared.
"Let's monitor her until 2 and reassess. If we keep seeing improvement, she can return home with you at the end of your shift," Arizona proposed.
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"Hello?" Ryder spoke as he answered his phone. An unfamiliar number was calling. Usually, he'd let it go right to voicemail. This time, mostly because he was bored and kicking back in a chair outside, he answered.
"Hi… umm… so this is Gwen, you know, Livie's girlfriend," she explained with hesitation.
"What's up, Gwen?" Ryder inquired. He was not about to let Olivia use his phone to speak to her girlfriend. Still stewing over Olivia's lies, Ryder wasn't in the mood to bend the rules for her.
"I have Olivia's backpack at my house. I'm guessing her phone was taken away, because I can't get a hold of her," Gwen explained.
Ryder chuckled, "Olivia had most of her life taken away. She's in pretty deep. No life for the next two weeks."
"Can I give you the backpack somehow? I don't have a car, so I can't bring it over," Gwen shared. "It has her wallet, her journal, and some other personal stuff she probably wants."
"I guess so," Ryder replied. "Where do you live?" Gwen described the location of her house, adding that it was easy for her to take the bus downtown. "Let me text you back. I might be heading downtown for lunch."
Ryder hung up and called Nolan. He loved making up fake names and attempting to break through the thick wall Nolan's assistant guarded with her life. When she answered, Ryder stated, "I need to speak with Mr. Nolan Tremblay Hunt. My name is Robert Marshfield. I'm calling from the Investigative branch of the Internal Revenue Service."
After Nolan's assistant asked the IRS agent to hold, she buzzed through to Nolan. He was chatting with two co-workers about a proposal the three were drafting. "Mr. Tremblay Hunt?"
Nolan answered the phone, "Yes?"
"A gentleman named Robert from the IRS is calling for you. Shall I put him through or take a message?" she questioned.
"I'm not expecting any calls from the IRS…" Nolan pondered aloud.
The assistant added, "He mentioned he was representing the investigation department."
"Hmmm… go ahead and put him through," Nolan requested as his mind began to imagine scenarios. Nolan answered, "Nolan Tremblay-Hunt."
"Yo, loser. Wanna do lunch?" Ryder guffawed with pride.
"Sure, Robert, I'd be open to scheduling a meeting to discuss that," Nolan responded as his co-workers chatted quietly about fifteen feet away from him.
Ryder roared with laughter, "You have people in your office, don't you? This is awesome."
"I do indeed. I actually have two files related to that matter," Nolan answered professionally.
"One o'clock? I can come up to your office and check out your big boy digs," Ryder proposed.
"Let me check my schedule… yes, that will be fine," Nolan agreed before concluding the call.
Ryder sent a text to Gwen and informed her that he could meet her outside Nolan's office building at either 12:45 or 2:30. She chose 12:45. Nate had called earlier and mentioned he needed to cancel the workout. Ryder decided he'd work out around 3 or 3:30, so he packed some clothes and shoes in a duffel bag.
A few minutes later, Ria approached Ryder. She was eager to go to the gym and learn about her new routine.
"Ryder? What's Julie's phone number?" Ria asked as she hobbled over.
"Why?" Ryder inquired, lowering his eyebrows.
"Cause I need to call her about something," Ria explained.
Ryder glanced at his sister and wondered, "What do you need to talk to her about?"
"Can I have her number please?" Ria persisted.
"I suppose. Do you have a pen and a piece of paper?" he inquired. She handed both to him and he jotted down two phone numbers. "The top one is her house and the second one is her cell."
"Thanks," Ria smirked.
"Hey…Mini Mama, how's your leg today?" Ryder wondered.
"It hurts but no more than normal," she shrugged.
Ryder sat up in the lounge chair and offered, "Want me to massage it? I'm not doing anything right now."
"Sure," Ria agreed readily. Ryder gave the best massages of anyone in the house. She wouldn't dream of turning down his offer.
"I'll scoot down to the end. You take the spot against the back of the chair so you can relax," he instructed.
"Wait!" Ria nearly gasped. She limped into the house and brought back some lotion. "I like it better with this stuff."
"Yes, Ma'am," Ryder winked. He poured some lotion on his hands and began rubbing her leg. Shocked, he could feel distinct knots and bumps in her muscle and was able to trace the inflamed one causing the most trouble. "Doesn't that hurt?"
"It feels better when you press on it," she shared.
"Make sure and tell me if I press too hard or if I do anything that hurts," Ryder reminded her. Ria rested against the seat back and closed her eyes. She resembled Amelia so closely that Ryder couldn't believe it. As he worked on her lower leg, ankle and foot, he thought about how much he'd miss Victoria and his other siblings. While he'd be surrounded by about 1100-1200 other people in the same situation he was experiencing, the company of his siblings – Ria, Lissa, and Nolan especially – was a place of deep comfort.
"You look like you're at a spa," Ryder chuckled.
"I'm relaxing," Ria informed him in a matter-of-fact tone. "That's why my eyes are closed."
"Can we talk or should I be quiet?" he wondered.
"We can talk, but I'm not opening my eyes," she explained.
Ryder posed a question, "When I'm away, are you going to write me letters? I'm going to miss you a ton."
"Probably. How many letters do you want?" she asked as if she was planning her social calendar.
"One a day," he joked, ready to tell her he was teasing.
Ria smiled even though her eyes stayed closed, "I can do that. Maybe some days, I can write two letters."
"I probably won't be able to write back very much. I'll be super busy," he explained.
"That's ok," she assured him.
As he continued to work out the toughest spots on her leg, Ryder mentioned, "Julie will be there, too. She'd probably love to receive letters from you."
"With that much to write, I might only have time to draw each of you a picture some days," Ria warned.
"That's ok," Ryder responded. "Hey, why do you need Julie's number?"
"Because I want to go to the gym today," she disclosed.
"I'm going to the gym around 3. I can take you," Ryder mentioned. "If you want, you can come with me to Nolan's office and have lunch with us."
"Really?" she exclaimed with joy as her eyes popped open.
"Sure," Ryder shrugged.
"I get to have lunch with two of my favorite brothers!" she beamed.
"How many favorite brothers do you have, Mini Mama?" he wondered.
"Three, Silly," Ria replied. "Nolan, Lucas and you."
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Julie eagerly waited for Nate to arrive on Wednesday morning. Her hair was in a French braid and she wore an oversized flannel shirt over her t-shirt. Tennies and shorts rounded out her casual look. She'd offered to pack lunch and a small cooler. Not sure how strenuous the hiking might be, she also packed a bag with a change of clothes and a pair of sandals. Sunscreen, towels and a blanket filled the rest of the oversized bag.
Promptly at 0850, Nate drove up. He was in shorts and a snug t-shirt that did a fine job of showing off his muscular physique. He knocked on the door, and Julie opened it immediately.
With a wide smile, Nate said softly, "Good morning." Even standard, customary, every day words sounded compelling when they came out of his mouth. Julie could listen to his voice all day and not grow weary.
"Hi," she beamed as she handed him the tote bag. When she picked up the cooler sitting beside her, he promptly reached for it and gently took it from her hand.
"Looks like we're ready to hit the road," he smiled. "Shall we?" Julie followed him to his Jeep. While stowing the cooler in the back, he watched her long legs as she climbed in. Her body was so fit and her youthful presence was light and airy. Try as he might, he was having a difficult time not falling for her.
As they pulled out, Nate mentioned, "I hope you don't mind if we change parks. I learned about a place about 3 miles from here called Smith Cove Park. The history of the place is colorful. Apparently the Navy tried to take over the land during World War II but didn't succeed."
"Sure, that's fine. The other spot is so far away. If we check out Smith Cove, we won't have to worry about traffic," Julie pointed out.
The conversation on the drive came easily. Nate shared what he could about the middle of the night emergency at the base the prior night, and Julie chatted about saying goodbye to Sam earlier that morning.
"Is he headed overseas?" Nate inquired.
"Back to San Diego," she answered. "Although we don't always know when he's slipping out of the country."
"Confidential or officially non-existent efforts, I suppose," Nate commented. "Kind of like how we keep sneaking away with one another," he winked as he pulled into a parking spot at the empty park.
They had decided to walk around and explore the park first. Nate had packed a small backpack with water, snacks, and more safety gear than most people even owned. As they set out, they walked side-by-side whenever possible.
"What a beautiful morning," Nate stated as the morning sun hit his face and as he grasped Julie's hand. "I love living where there's such low humidity."
"Don't remind me about the sauna-like weather in Maryland," Julie giggled.
With a casual shrug, Nate assured her, "You get used to it. You'll be so busy that you'll barely have time to notice the weather." Julie caught his eye and smiled, then he added, "I'm really going to miss you."
Her heart fluttered and she stopped walking. She wrapped her arms around Nate and hugged him, saying, "I'm going to miss you, too. Timing is not on our side, is it?" Nate kissed the top of her head and stroked her hair as he held her. He didn't want to discuss the writing on the wall; instead, he preferred to relish each moment possible. However, he knew what he needed to do before the day was through.
Their ninety-minute-long, meandering stroll led them to the water. They sat down, snacking and holding hands. Nate brushed a crumb off Julie's chin, which led to an extended make out session. Soon, Nate was flat on his back and Julie stretched out alongside his chest.
"I wish we could be up here in the middle of the night. I wonder how much the ships in the port light up the space," Nate sighed.
Julie rested her cheek on Nate's chest and agreed, "Someday we'll have to sneak into the park late at night in our Navy-issued survival gear and confirm your hunch." Her comment, which seemed to hint at a possible future the two of them could share, was far more naïve than it sounded. Nate hummed a brief response and sat up, basically doing a curl up with Julie along his side. She laughed as she repositioned herself, ending up sitting next to him, bending her knees and wrapping her arms around her bent legs. He closed his eyes and took in the moment. They sat quietly and listened to the water lap along the shore.
"Your hair looks beautiful with the sun hitting it," Nate cooed.
"I don't ever want this to stop," Julie disclosed as she rested her head on his shoulder.
"Me either" Nate replied. "I've tried and tried to figure out a way we could be together, but I'm sure you know we can't date if you're at the Academy."
With hints of a frown, Julie responded, "I know. Sam made that abundantly clear."
"You told him about us?" Nate inquired, attempting to hide his dismay.
"No," she shook her head. "He – and Ryder too, for what it's worth – suspect it. I haven't confirmed their suspicions."
Nate ran his fingers through his hair then transitioned onto his back. He shifted his body and was obviously preoccupied. He knew what he needed to say, "Don't get me wrong, JJ. You are amazing and I thoroughly enjoy every minute we spend together. The sad part is that this relationship is all kinds of wrong."
"Can't we pretend it isn't until I leave?" she pressed gently.
"Is that really a good idea? It'll make saying goodbye even more difficult," Nate pondered aloud.
"Sometimes the Navy is annoying," Julie declared flatly.
With a chuckle, Nate defended his employer, "The rules are there for a reason, but, yeah… agreed." He gazed over at her and shared, "The answer remains the same: it can't. Having a secret relationship – especially long-distance – isn't wise, and there's no way to be together openly if you're at the Academy."
"Maybe that's the answer," Julie proposed without thinking. "Maybe I could post-pone my entry."
"I'd never let you do that," Nate shook his head. "I'd be too concerned that you'd end up resenting your decision."
"Then let's enjoy the time we have left," Julie suggested. "It's not ideal, but it's also not breaking any rules at this point."
Nate sputtered, "Although dating the daughter of your CO is usually inadvisable. Besides, this isn't who I am. Except for drinking or pulling off stupid pranks, I've been a pretty boring rule-follower."
She leaned close to his face and stated with a mischievous grin, "Listen, Mister… do you want a few more opportunities to kiss this face or don't you? Figure it out because wishy-washy doesn't work for me."
Nate laughed, "You're kilin' me." His laughter faded as he gazed out at the water. Without making eye contact, Nate reiterated tenderly, "It's all kinds of wrong, Julie. As much as I'd love to spend every possible minute with you before the end of the month, it's not fair to either of us." He paused and stared at the blanket, concerned to see her face. "Today's it. I'm aching because I don't want to hurt your feelings and because we have a great time together…"
"But we're done," Julie interjected with a cracking voice. "This is it."
"Yes," Nate replied, finally turning his head and noticing Julie's tears. He reached over to wipe them off with his index finger, but Julie leaned back.
"If we're through that's not your job anymore," she whispered. She reached into her bag and searched for her cell phone. With it in her hand, she stood and informed Nate that she'd be walking home. She asked if he could drop the cooler by the house and leave it on the porch.
"I'm happy to take you home," he offered.
"I want to walk," she insisted gently. "Thanks for all your help with workouts. I've enjoyed being with you."
"Julie, really," Nate sighed, "let me give you a ride."
"No," she shook her head. "Not necessary."
"I'm open to continuing the workouts. That doesn't have to stop," he mentioned.
"It does. It does need to stop," she stated clearly but gently. "Thanks again, Nate. Take care of yourself." Not stopping for a final hug or goodbye, Julie threw her bag over her shoulder and began walking at a brisk pace. She wanted to be as far away from Nate as possible when the tears burning in her eyes began to fall.
Nate fell onto his back and stared at the sky. He could hold his tears in until he was alone, but devastation filled him. If only we'd met at a different time… he thought sadly.
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