I have time. I have ideas. the only thing I dont have is the rights to harry potter and the various materials used.

Harry was excited, finally he was leaving to learn magic. He had all his books packed away in his inventory (that he had only just learned to access) He had a trunk packed to the brim with sodas and junkfoods (for appearances) and he had his new wolf pup peter stowed away in his, disturbingly spacious, robes.

"this is going to be a good year"

Normally he wouldnt have tempted murphy but so far nothing bad had happened, he'd hitched a ride with bubba and da boyz (after many manly backslaps and poorly hidden tears) it hadnt taken long to find the platform thanks to his map and he'd found a compartment near the batrooms and far from the other students.

aaaah bliss.

"excuse me have you seen a toad?"

Well so much for that.

With a small grunt and a few muttered curses Harry turned to the intruder.

The intruder turned out to be a girl with short curly hair and brown eyes dressed in her hogwarts robes and a bright pink beret. Well girl or not it dosnt really change the fact that she annoyed him.

"nope no toads here. was that all?'

Apparently she took his response as an invitation to join him and flopped on the seat across from him.

"I'm Hermione Granger, and you are?"

"I'm Harry and dont you have a toad to look for?"

At his response she gave a huff and turned her head to the side in a childish display of anger.

"Look I was just helping someone else find it but it's not like it's my problem if the little slimeball dosnt turn up."

Oh great annoying and arrogant.

"how kind of you to offer what help you did"

Apparently she was also oblivious to sarcasm.

"yeah! see you get it Harry...heeeey you said harry right? as in Harry Potter? The famous kid?"

Huh well thats new, were people watching him play the game? was he some kind of big time celebrity?

"If I am it's news to me"

After that they settled in silence for the rest of the ride (except for a brief period of excitement when peter attached a blond boy who barged into the compartment).

Time skip two hours

Finally the Train pulled to a stop and everyone piled out onto the dirt road leading to a dock.

"Firs years, to the boats, no more n four per boat."

"Holy shit! for a big guy hagrid can be surprisingly stealthy" Harry hopped into the nearest boat and found himself sitting with a Red haired boy with a ton of freckles, a red haired girl with a ton of freckles and a blond girl staring of into space. Giving a quick look to the Tags floating overhead he saw The names Ron and Ginny.

Waaaaait a second. this math seems off.

3 people - 2 names = 1 unknown.

Well time to fish for information.

"Hi. I'm Harry, can I ask who you three are?"

Apparently the guy was the speaker for the trio.

"sure mate, I'm Ron weasley, this is Ginny my little sister, and the one poking at nothing is luna lovegood"

Glancing at Luna he saw she was not infact poking at nothing. she was poking at the Tags floating over Rons and Ginnys heads, even stranger then that was the fact that she could actually touch them!

Before he could question further they reached the other side of the docks. Damn Harry had really wanted to get a good look at the castle but he only caught a quick glimpse of stone walls and a big square building on the lawn before they went inside.

"well I got to hand it to you murphy you never stop being creative"

After standing around for about ten minutes and meeting almost as many specters as the ghost-busters they were ushered in and the sorting began. Kid after kid was called up and sorted in no apparent order.

"Weasley, Ronald"

"GRIFFINDOR!"

"Malfoy, Draconius"

"RAVENCLAW!"

"Granger, Hermione"

"SLYTHRIN!"

"Ddraig, Issac"

'HUFFELPUFF!'

Finally it was harrys turn.

so with a few quick steps he was at the stool being gawked at by about 12 people wearing an old hat that smelled of cheese.

"yeah sorry about that, Albus wore me to breakfast last week and dropped me"

Ok wonderful. it's finally happened Harry Potter has gone 100% cookoo. time for the pudding.

"NO! your not crazy kid I'm the sorting hat, gods where do you come up with this stuff?"

"The internet, and waaay to much free time"

"alright lets just get this done. you're about as subtle as a flying Mallet so no slythrin."

"well fuck you too"

"your certainly brave, but have about as much chivalry as a whores son"

"that one actually stung a bit"

"you'll live kid, now you are smart but a bit to brutish for the ravens so that leaves..."

"HUFFELPUFF!"

Well great apparently that was not expected because now even more eyes were trained on harry.

Fuck, how can this get worse?

"Mortis, Edward"

"HUFFELPUFF!"

'lovegood, luna"

"HUFFELPUFF"

Oh thats how.