Go Baby Grow

Chapter 57 – Sorting Out Details

Monday, June 22

Ryder and Julie played fetch with Barkley and sat outside the treehouse until sunset. Bogie was curled up next to his boy with a paw over Ryder's legs. The dog seemed to sense that Ryder would soon be leaving.

"What'll you miss most when we're in Annapolis, JJ?" Ryder wondered.

His question caught Julie by surprise. She hadn't really considered what she was leaving behind. Instead, she was looking forward to returning to her childhood roots near Washington, DC. With an uncertain tone, she suggested, "Maybe the weather? It's so temperate here and can be so nasty there. Humidity and heat in the summers. Snow and cold in the winters. How about you?"

Ryder gazed over at his friend quizzically. The weather? "My family and friends. These goofy mutts. Living in a place where I know the lay of the land. I'm going to miss a lot."

"I hope we're near each other in Bancroft," Julie shared, referring to the enormous dorm that held all 4000+ students during the school year.

"We'll see each other no matter what," Ryder assured her.

Scoffing, Julie warned, "Ryder, our free time and freedom will be so ridiculously limited. If we're not in the same squad, which is highly unlikely, we probably won't have a chance to talk until August."

"They just want you to think that's the case," Ryder shook his head as he downplayed her report.

"Yeah, how would I know? Sam and I are the 8th generation of the Caldwell family and I'm the 20th family member to attend the Academy," Julie quipped.

Ryder laughed, "Yeah, right."

She flashed her eyes his way and gazed deeply. Ryder knew the look. Suddenly uncomfortable, he sputtered, "Seriously? Eighth generation? Holy Crap. Is there a Caldwell building on campus?"

"Not yet," Julie smirked proudly, "but most of the buildings are named after fallen war heroes, so I guess that's a good thing."

"Why didn't you tell me this before?" Ryder spouted, still shocked by the news.

Julie shrugged, "It's not like I want it broadcasted. Do you know how much hell I'll get if our detailers find out? Or if anyone finds out, for that matter?"

"You earned your place there," Ryder pointed out.

"You know that, but anyone else will think my daddy bought my way in through influence and money," Julie stressed. "Seriously, Ryder, please don't ever say a word to anyone about it."

"Then why did you tell me?" Ryder chuckled.

"Because I was trying to prove to you that I know what the hell I'm talking about when it comes to the Academy, stupid," Julie chuckled back. "Don't doubt my wisdom, young Padwan."

Ryder leaned over and bumped her shoulder playfully. He continued leaning on her as he apologized sarcastically, "So sorry I doubted you, O Learned One."

"Get off me, you nerd," Julie laughed. "But, seriously, Ry. The only way we'll have a chance to talk is if our companies are together and everyone is waiting for a turn on an obstacle course or something. Even then, we'll be expected to be studying our rates and not jabbering away."

"No free time?" Ryder sought to confirm.

"Very, very little. Come to church on Sundays – at least we'll have time together after service," Julie insisted.

"What other secrets have you failed to share with me?" Ryder pressed.

"Know when to joke and when to be serious – you need that piece of advice for sure," Julie began with a grin. "And be prepared to not be perfect. Their goal is to find something you will fail. Think about it, there's a less than 10% acceptance rate. We're not going to be at the top of our class – our whole class will be high achievers from their schools. Everyone is going to be used to being special and elite. One of the goals is to break that down and form us into a unit."

"What if someone is great at everything? A great athlete, incredible memorizer, fast learner… all that," Ryder wondered.

"They'll find something. It's their job to push each plebe to the edge and bring them down a notch. If you're smart, you'll let that happen and not fight it. Think about that before reacting this summer. You're quite adept at resistance, Ry," Julie boldly declared.

"Because I'm awesome," Ryder scoffed jokingly.

Raising one eyebrow, Julie cracked a half smile and quipped, "That's my advice. Take it or leave it."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~'

Parked at a dock, Olivia and Gwen made up for lost time. In addition to receiving a new baggie to stock her supply of Valium, Olivia lay down along the back seat and sank into the comfort of a back rub. Gwen's touch relaxed her and made her skin tingle. Feeling Gwen's fingers caress her back brought Olivia to sighs of delight.

"I can't be late. Are you watching the time?" Olivia moaned with pleasure.

Gwen reminded her date, "I set an alarm on my phone. Don't worry. Let's just relax and be together, Livs."

"What time is it now?" Olivia wondered aloud.

"Livs..." Gwen sighed. "Don't worry about it."

"Easy for you to say," Olivia laughed softly. "Your parents don't even know the word 'curfew.'"

"I know," Gwen spoke reassuringly as she stretched out on top of Olivia's bare back. Stroking Olivia's side and kissing her cheek, Gwen disclosed, "It's 10:30."

Olivia turned over so she and Gwen were stomach to stomach. She reached for Gwen's multi-colored hair and swept a strand behind Gwen's ear. "I want to be home before 11:30. It'll show him I'm trying."

"And I want to be with you all night," Gwen smiled. "I wish we could be."

"Me too," Olivia sighed. "I don't want to go, but I should. Take me home now and there will be a better chance that I can see you tomorrow."

Gwen kissed her girlfriend repeatedly before sitting up and buttoning her shirt. Likewise, Olivia put on her bra and pulled on her t-shirt. The two held hands as Gwen drove Olivia home. Once at the Lake House, Olivia encouraged Gwen to come inside, but Gwen declined. Olivia entered the front door and spotted Owen in the kitchen to her right.

"That you, Livie?" Owen called out as he walked into the Living Room with a beer.

"Yep. I'm back," Olivia smirked before turning toward the stairs.

"Wait, wait…" Owen urged. "Tell me about your night."

Sliding down the first stair and leaning her back against the wall, Olivia groaned internally as she answered, "It was great, Dad. So nice to see Gwen."

"What'd you two do?" Owen asked curiously. Olivia could tell he wasn't grilling her; rather, he was trying to make conversation.

She knew the truth – we parked and made out – was not advisable. "We just hung out… you know… teenager stuff."

"What's teenager stuff?" Owen chuckled.

Shrugging her shoulders, Olivia added, "Talked and laughed. We hung out."

"Sounds nice," Owen reflected as he pondered her vague responses.

"It was," Olivia smiled and turned toward the stairs.

After she had ascended two steps, Owen called, "Where? Where did you girls hang out?"

Without turning or stopping, Olivia responded, "At a park. 'Night Daddy."

"Goodnight, Livs. Good job being home early," Owen responded, unsure if he should press for further details. He missed his little Olivia who could never wait to share every detail of her life with him. This older version wanted privacy and kept secrets. Owen yearned for his little girl.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~'

Julie slid in the front door, well before her midnight curfew. Unsure if Tessa and Adam would be awake, she erred on the side of being quiet. When she reached the top of the stairs, Julie heard Adam and Tessa talking. They were in the Master Bedroom with the door ajar.

"Tess…why now? Why in the hell did you wait until now to tell me this?" Adam asked with a slight hint of frustration and a bigger sense of disappointment.

"What would I have said, Adam? You were married to Claire. I wasn't about to interfere with your brand new marriage and family," Tessa insisted with love.

"But you were my family, too," Adam grieved. Julie sat at the top of the stairs, curious to hear the conversation and afraid to interrupt it by walking by the open door. "I never knew, Tess. I never knew."

"What would've changed?" Tessa pressed. "You were married and expecting a baby. You weren't going to run away from your obligations. Besides, I knew I'd be fine. If I had needed anything, I had my sister and brother-in-law right there in Annapolis."

"You never even told me," Adam repeated with sadness.

"You're right. I didn't," Tessa confessed. "I suppose that's why I felt like I needed to tell you tonight. I don't want to have any secrets from you, Calds. I'm so sorry."

A long pause filled the silence. Much to Julie's surprise, the next sound was Adam sniffling. Is he crying? My dad?

Through his broken heart, Adam cried and stated, "I could have been there for you, Tess. I wish you would have given me that opportunity."

Adam leaned on Tessa and cried on her shoulder. She embraced him and rubbed his back as she repeatedly apologized. "If you'd been there, Claire would not have approved. It would have only driven a wedge between you and your wife. Claire knew how we felt about each other. My presence in any way, shape, or form so early in your marriage would have been destructive, Adam. I chose to do what was best for you and your family. I hope you can understand that."

"I do understand. That doesn't mean I'm not devastated. Does Hannah know?" Adam inquired. As she eavesdropped, Julie wondered who Hannah was.

"No. The girls and Sam don't need to know about this," Tessa stated.

The girls and Sam? The girls?! I'm one girl. Are there others? Who's the other girl? What is she talking about? Julie's mind raced. And what is the big secret she told him that has Dad crying?

"You're right," Adam agreed. "The whole situation… it was so long ago. I agree."

"Have you spoken to Julie yet?" Tessa asked gently.

"I can't figure out what to say," Adam disclosed.

Tessa pointed out, "You have until Thursday, Adam."

"I know. Can you be with me when I tell her?" Adam begged.

"I'm not sure if I should," Tessa shared.

Uneasy, yet completely confused, Julie decided she'd heard enough. She slid down a few stairs and walked up them heavily to warn her father that she was home. When she turned at the top of the stairs, she called out, "Dad? I'm home."

The Master Bedroom door closed firmly and quickly as Adam cleared his throat and responded, "Ok, Itsy. Goodnight."

Julie fell asleep an hour later as she lay on her bed both straining to hear the continued conversation and attempting to ignore it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`'

Tuesday, June 23

"I'm really glad you two came downtown to have lunch with me," Nolan confided as he looked across the table at Amelia and Ryder. Glancing at his brother, Nolan became teary and disclosed, "What am I going to do after you leave, Bonehead? Who will I call when I need someone to set me straight?"

"Come join the Academy with me. I hear they're fitness program far exceeds your fancy corporate gym," Ryder quipped, ignoring his brother's emotionality.

Amelia pressed her lips together and leaned toward Nolan, "What's weighing on you, Nole?"

"A part of me wants to lay it all out on the table right here and right now. Another part of me isn't sure I can keep myself composed in public," Nolan pondered aloud.

"Start," Ryder urged. "Start where you can and if you go all weepy on us, I'll kick you or throw you to the ground to take your mind off the drama."

"Always so helpful," Nolan smiled hesitantly. He looked down and picked at his salad, sharing quietly, "Molly has three molars coming in. Poor baby is constantly asking for her paci and Nam."

Under the table, Amelia set a hand on Ryder's knee. She was hoping to prevent him from responding with either a quip or a correction that they weren't here to discuss Molly.

"I thought the paci was Nam?" Amelia inquired with confusion.

Nolan huffed gently, "Sometimes. Especially if she's being a pill and you only give her one or the other. In that case, Nam is always the other item."

"I love her mind… she's constantly ticking," Amelia stated warmly.

"Like a time bomb," Nolan laughed. "Lissa is so incredibly patient and loving with her. She kneels down so they are eye-to-eye. She stays calm and reasonable. She's an amazing mom."

"We've always suspected that would be the case," Amelia grinned.

"I'm afraid she's going to leave me," Nolan mumbled.

Ryder's brow lowered as he wondered if he had heard his brother correctly. "What?" he asked with disbelief.

"Last night after dinner, we put the girls to bed and had a huge fight," Nolan explained. "She's tired of feeling like she runs our home by herself… says I'm never there… that I work too much… that she and the girls aren't my priority."

Amelia slowly took in a deep breath, "Is she on track?"

Nolan's green eyes peeked up at his mom and admitted, "Yes." Ryder suddenly wished he hadn't been invited to this conversation. If Nolan and Lissa weren't a given, nothing else in the world seemed stable. The concept that anything at home might go on without him hadn't occurred to Ryder. He'd been spending his time thinking about his own changes and adventures instead.

In her caring but candid way, Amelia stated plainly, "What are you going to do about this?"

"I was hoping you two could help me sort it out," Nolan said wearily. "They are my priority, Mom. They are…"

Interrupting, Amelia finished his sentence, "But your job is demanding."

"Exactly," Nolan nodded. "And I love it. I really love my job and the difference I make here."

"I completely understand," Amelia affirmed. "And Dad would too."

"Why don't you just skate out of the office at 5 o'clock and get your ass home every night?" Ryder pressed. Had Amelia not been there, Ryder knew he would have added, You'd get laid more often that way, Bro.

Nolan and Amelia caught each other's eyes. Not having been in their shoes, Ryder didn't understand. Nolan twisted the paper from his straw and explained, "It's not that simple, Ryder. Most of my work is in the moment. I respond to crises. If something comes up at 4:45, I don't stand on my desk and declare that I'm calling it a night anyway."

"Then they need to hire another you – one for every eight hours or something," Ryder proposed.

"That'd be ideal, but it's not how it works," Nolan clarified.

"Which do you love more – your work or your family?" Ryder challenged, stuck in an either-or mentality.

"My family," Nolan promptly affirmed.

"Then find another job or start your own business. You're a flippin' brainiac, Nolan. It's not like this is the only job you'll ever find," Ryder expressed with reason. Shaking his head, Ryder shared, "This is exactly why I've always said I won't get married. It's too hard to balance work and family."

"It's not easy, that's for sure," Nolan confirmed.

"But a life filled with work is pretty damn empty," Amelia emphasized. "I've been there. It's not all there is in life."

"Yeah," Ryder attempted to protest, "but you weren't flying F/A-18 Hornets."

With a casual shrug, Amelia responded, "You're right. Intricately removing tumors from someone's brain is so damn boring and unrewarding."

"Now you're just messing with me," Ryder protested with a grin. "No grandbabies from this guy, Mom. Not gonna happen. You've known that for years."

"Looks like you'd better keep focused on that family of yours, Nolan," Amelia quipped, amazed at how Ryder could make nearly any conversation about him in only a matter of minutes.

Nolan smirked as he chewed a bite of lunch. Obviously, having Ryder present wasn't the best idea after all. Even so, he would miss his brother tremendously. "I wish we could have run up to Victoria before you took off," he told Ryder. "We should have planned that."

"Huh?" Ryder wondered, focusing on their sister.

"The city, Stupid. Our hometown," Nolan clarified.

"Right…" Ryder nodded. "We still could. I don't leave until Sunday. Today's only Tuesday."

"My life isn't that spontaneous any more, Ry," Nolan stated.

"Wanna go, Mom? There are couches in Canada, you know. You can do the bedrest thing there," Ryder pointed out.

"I'm not sure your dad would appreciate me leaving the country right before a trip to Maryland, Bear," Amelia commented.

"Find a way to go, Nolan. Bring Lissa. You can walk along the water and remember losing your V-card. It'll be romantic," Ryder pressed.

"With you along for the ride?" Nolan laughed. "Yeah… so damn romantic to bring your little brother along."

"Younger brother," Ryder corrected. "I'm an inch taller than you. I'm not your little brother."

"Whatever," Nolan laughed. "You're so damn competitive."

"I'm serious, Nolan. Let's go. Let's make this happen," Ryder encouraged. "You don't mind, do you, Mom?"

"Mind? No," Amelia responded. "But your days are few, Ryder. Why don't you go to Victoria after Christmas? The city will still be decorated, and the two of you will have time to plan the trip."

"And the girls will be easier to pawn off for a few days," Nolan added.

"Lissa and Julie?!" Ryder asked with surprise.

"My daughters, Uka Wy," Nolan closed his eyes and shook his head.

"Right," Ryder nodded.