Brotherhood

Chapter 32

...

The sound was far off, but held no interest for him as he stumbled along the edge of the bayou in search of his brother Elan. Finding him was his only immediate concern on this fucked up day. He was so very tired, his mind in a fog now that his adrenaline had faded away. He was sick of the smell of algae and death, sick of the deadening heat, the clinging humidity and the questions that hovered unanswered in the dullness of his mind.

The sudden swoosh and dark running shadow of a low flying helicopter startled him, the whirring blades loud and incessant, violently ruffling the trees overhead and making him curse at the interruption. He wasn't surprised that Hetty had sent backup, wasn't angry either. Maybe being lifted up into the darkening orange sky would help him escape his thoughts, and remind him there was another world beyond the one he had been mired in for the last few weeks. He just needed to find Elan.

"You okay, Cuz?" His brother asked as he stepped out from behind a tree, dripping wet.

"Sort of. You?" He staggered with relief as he looked him over for injuries.

"Can we go home now?"

The intonation made him smile. He sounded just like his son.

"You get Prou?"

"Tried to shoot me. Didn't work out for him," he said with a weary shrug. "Guidry?"

"Fed himself to the gators."

"Seems right," Elan said after a pause.

As soon as they walked out of the trees a steel gray helicopter swooped over them and hovered above the dirt road. Long ropes immediately dropped and four armed men in black slid down and began yelling at them to get on the ground. When Deeks didn't immediately obey, two of them rushed him. While one pointed an assault rifle at his chest, the other kicked his legs out from under him and shoved him facedown in the dirt, grinding a knee into the small of his back. Elan shouted something in Arapaho before they did the same to him. He was too exhausted to fight them, but Elan did and was knocked unconscious for it. He screamed curses, but his anger at their treatment wasn't enough to stir the energy to resist. He was just too damn tired.

"Get the fuck off him," a woman yelled out, cutting through the noise and making him open his eyes. "Didn't you read the intel, or are you just dumb, blind and stupid? This is one of the men we came to rescue, you idiot."

The man got up off of him, mumbling an apology before the woman shoved him away.

"Sorry Deeks. Some people don't read the memos," Safa said, reaching down to help him up.

"Didn't need to be rescued until you people got here," he said as he headed to where Elan lay.

"Hetty sent us in for exfil," she said as he knelt down beside his brother. "Found Alonzo and Roy. Told us you two went after Guidry. These testosterone junkies didn't get that intel."

He dug the earwig out of his ear and angrily tossed it away. "We both went into the bayou. Now get your fucking men away from us."

"Sorry man," one of the tactical squad offered. "Couldn't be sure you two weren't part of the militia."

"You could have asked our names, dickwad," Deeks growled sharply as Elan began to stir. "Just a warning. Don't be here when he wakes up. We ain't in the best of moods right now."

"You back to being Jimmy Hale again?" Elan mumbled as he pushed himself up onto one elbow and pressed a hand to the back of his head.

"He wouldn't have put up with this shit, that's for sure," Deeks replied. "Can you walk?"

"Worth a shot," he replied as Deeks pulled him to his feet.

"Please accept my apology, Elan," Safa said, her voice still touched with the anger she had shown earlier.

Neither one of them replied, they simply started walking back to where they'd left Roy and Zo. Deeks began to disassociate himself from everything happening around them. Pave Hawk helicopters flew back and forth over the grounds of the storage facility and there were others on the ground. Tactical squads were searching the buildings and perimeter, tending to the dead and rounding up what remained of The Brotherhood. The mission was over for him and for Elan. He would be debriefed, but he would insist that happen tomorrow, because tonight he was going to go see Callen, take the hottest shower he could stand, and then sleep in a clean, soft bed in whatever hotel they stuck him in.

"Agent Deeks?"

He stopped and turned toward the man shouting his name, so exhausted he stumbled into Elan. He was surprised the man was dressed in a suit, but became instantly pissed when he saw Special Agent Murphy of Homeland Security walking beside him.

"What the hell do you want," he asked without energy.

"Agent Deeks, I'm Terrance Rigby, head of the Joint Terrorism Task Force," the man replied with a slight smile.

"Sorry sir," Deeks said, clawing his damp, dirty hair out of his eyes and standing up a little straighter.

"I think I'm the one who should apologize to you," the man said. "Saw some of the more enthusiastic men on the tactical squad roughed you and Mr. Hand up a bit. That shouldn't have happened."

"Elan's head is pretty hard, sir, and I'm getting used to being knocked around on this assignment," Deeks said. "What can I do for you?"

"Did you find Guidry?"

"Yes sir. He died back there in the bayou," he replied. "Won't find his body though. The gators got him."

"Didn't you try to stop them?" Murphy blurted out.

"Seriously?" Deeks asked wearily. "You don't get out much do you?"

"The bayou's right over there," Elan said, irritated and gruff. "Full of gators and mosquitos. Go take a walk and see which one bites you first."

"We'll take his word for it, Murphy," Rigby said, shaking his head in amusement. "Now, gentlemen, I'd like to offer you a ride back to New Orleans. Blanchard and Alonzo are on a medevac flight there for medical attention and I've been informed that Agent Callen is out of surgery and doing well. Hetty thought you might like to see that for yourselves."

Deeks blinked slowly as his words sunk in. It really was all over, and his eyes watered as Elan threw an arm across his shoulders.

"Zo and Roy gonna be okay?" Elan asked.

"Roy was a little difficult to deal with as usual, but he'll be fine," he replied. "Sergeant Alonzo sustained some serious injuries, but he was conscious and talking when they loaded him on the transport."

"Thank you, sir," Deeks said, appreciating the information and the man's kind tone.

"Let's get you two on board my chopper," he said. "You look dead on your feet."

As they headed toward the waiting helicopter, he began to shake with fatigue and Elan let his arm slip down around him, and he leaned into his solid body, grateful for the support. Even though his mind was muddled, his thoughts turned to Joe, and he felt a deep longing to talk to him and assure him that his brothers were safe and coming home to the ranch. Once they were strapped in and on comms, the pilot gave a thumbs up, and the helo lifted off, rising into the deep indigo sky, leaving the harsh reality of the swamp and The Brotherhood behind as if it never existed. The dark forbidding expanse of the swamp spread out beneath them, and it looked as if it went on forever. He choked on the bitter bile that rose in his throat as the haunting images of Guidry's death crowded into his mind. The man could have killed him, but had let him live and that was a mystery to him, one much bigger than the endless swamp below him. He stared out at the ribbon of orange on the far horizon, struggling to make sense of the madman's reasoning, but he wasn't sure he would ever truly understand.

...

"Is he still sleeping, Mr. Hanna?" the familiar voice dragging him out of his dark dreams. "Did they sedate him?"

"They wanted to give him something, but he threatened to kick their ass if they tried," Sam replied. "Told them he'd already been drugged by one doctor and didn't intend to let another one stick a needle in him."

"Did he take anything for the pain?" Hetty asked.

"One of the doctors injected something into his IV line."

"Never asked for that," Deeks murmured sleepily, his eyes still closed. "Never asked to be admitted either."

"No, Mr. Deeks. They were following my orders," Hetty said, gently patting his arm and startling him awake.

"Hetty? Thought I was still on comms," He said, pushing himself upright and rubbing at his eyes. "When did you get here?"

"I grabbed a seat on a flight out of Coronado this morning that was headed for Belle Chasse," she replied. "I wanted to check on you and Mr. Callen personally."

"How long have I been here?" He asked, noting that it was dark outside.

"They checked you in around ten last night," Sam said with a wide grin.

"Sam alerted me to how exhausted you were, Mr. Deeks, and after speaking on the phone with one of the ER doctors, I decided a night in the hospital would be a good idea."

"Traitor," he grumped to Sam.

"Elan told me he had trouble waking you up when the helo landed," Sam explained as if talking to a small child. "I was just looking out for you."

"This wasn't necessary," he replied, waving his arm to indicate his surroundings. "I just wanted to talk to Callen and find a hotel room."

"You failed to mention that a couple of your cracked ribs had turned into broken ones," Hetty scolded. "The doctor was concerned with all the bruising as well, and you were obviously quite exhausted since you not only slept through the night, but through the day as well."

Deeks shook his head and started pulling out the IV, and the other monitoring devices attached to him before either one could stop him.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Sam boomed out.

"Where's Elan?"

"With G," Sam finally said quietly, shaking his head as Deeks shoved the side rail down and swung his legs over the side.

"Unless you want a glimpse of my naked ass, Hetty, I suggest you leave and let me get dressed."

"And unless you stop being a pain in the ass, I'm not givin' you your clothes," Sam warned.

"I'm sure I can convince the nurses to give me a robe," He said with a small grin, resolutely crossing his arms over his chest. "Come on, Sam. What room's he in?"

"You two probably are real brothers separated at birth," Sam said, irritated but resigned that Deeks wasn't going to listen to him. "You're both hard headed and stubborn as a damn mule."

"I just need to see him, Sam."

"That's just what he said a few hours ago," he replied. "That's why Elan is with him. To keep him from getting out of bed and hurting himself in the process, not to mention flashing everybody trying to find you."

"I'm fine, Sam," Deeks said. "Just let me go...please, brother."

"There's a go-bag under the bed, Mr. Deeks," Hetty said. "I'll see you in Mr. Callen's room."

When she was gone, Deeks eased himself back down on the edge of the bed to steady himself, while Sam fished out his stuff. His body felt like one big bruise, and he couldn't seem to keep from yawning.

"Is he gonna be okay?"

"You both are eventually," he replied. "Elan said you had a rough night. Had a few nightmares, but ever woke up. Hetty kept the investigators from the DOJ away all day and they weren't too happy about it. She told them you needed your rest and that she would be doing your debrief when you were up for it."

He nodded without comment and pulled out a fresh pair of jeans, an old LAPD t-shirt and a pair of flip-flops. He tousled his hair into place, realizing it was clean, but he didn't remember how.

"Did I shower last night?"

"Not surprised you don't remember. You were pretty out of it once they got you to your room."

It felt good to have on clean clothes, but he could still smell the ghostly stench of the swamp, and it gave him a chill. Maybe he was just imagining it, but wisps of evaporating dreams still lingered, disturbing and dark. He stood up quickly and reached for Sam, needing something solid and real to hold onto.

"I got you," the big man said, his warm hand gripping his arm and holding him in place. "It's not far."

There were two federal agents stationed outside the door to his room, and he looked quickly at Sam, worried that they had missed someone in the raid.

"They're Hetty's," Sam laughed. "Your guest list is limited to her and a very short list of approved visitors. Thought Colin Murphy was gonna have a stroke when he wasn't allowed to question you."

There were more agents stationed outside of Callen's room, but the door was open and he could see Callen watching him with a critical eye as he walked in.

"You look like shit," Callen said, his expression intense.

Deeks stopped abruptly and looked away and then down at the floor, afraid he was angry with him, not that he would blame him.

"Deeks? You got 'im didn't you?" Callen asked softly, sounding uncertain.

"Yeah...sort of," he replied, still maintaining his distance.

"Tell me," he whispered gently and Deeks looked at him for the first time. "Did he hurt you?"

"No...no. He...he let me live," Deeks managed to choke out. "I don't know why...and then he sliced a cut across his chest with my knife and just laid down in the water. He let the gators take him, G. Didn't scream...nothing...not one sound..."

Deeks turned to walk away, tears coming for some reason he didn't understand. Sam stepped in front of him and Elan stepped up behind, tightly gripping his shoulder.

"What's wrong?" Callen asked. "Are you mad at me cause I got myself shot and wasn't there?"

"What?" Deeks turned to look at him in shock that he thought that. "I was supposed to have your back and I didn't."

"Being a little hard on yourself don't you think?" He replied. "None of us knew Rasmussen had his second guard unit already in position. There was nothing you could have done. I was just slow to react and it almost got me killed. That's not on you, brother."

"When you went down..." He started. "It scared the shit out of me."

"Me too," Callen smirked. "Hurt like hell too."

Deeks finally move to the side of the bed and Callen reached out for him, grabbing his hand and pulling him as close as he could.

"They wouldn't let me come see you, kid," he said.

"Had to pull a knife on 'im to keep him in bed," Elan said.

"Scared one of the nurses so bad she transferred off the floor," Callen reported with a soft grin.

"I think the hospital will be more than pleased when we're all off the premises," Hetty remarked.

"When can we leave, Hetty?" Deeks asked. "I need to see Joe."

"I have a private jet standing by to take you to Wyoming after your debrief," she replied. "Mr. Callen's departure will have to wait until the doctors are willing to release him. Your family knows you are all okay. They'll be waiting."

"You have a private jet now, Hetty?" Sam laughed.

"Yes. It used to belong to Newton Pierce. I simply confiscated it for use by our task force," she replied smugly. "It's quite well appointed and comfortable."

"I'll bet it is," Deeks said quietly.

"Thought y'all woulda busted out the single malt scotch by now," Roy drawled out as he entered, leaning heavily on a cane. "Should be celebratin'. Got all those bastards 'cept one."

Deeks was happy to see Roy, but was shaken by his last comment and began mentally running through a list of the members of The Brotherhood and Pierce's group. "Who got away?"

"Jacqueline Bennett," Hetty said sourly. "She has proven to be quite resourceful, but we'll run her to ground."

"Who you got doin' that?" Roy asked.

"Nell is working closely with Safa Jordan," she replied. "Ms. Bennett won't be able to stay hidden for long. They'll find her."

"No question about that," Sam laughed. "You need a file on that woman, Hetty."

"I already have one, Mr. Hanna."

"Promised you some of my gumbo, boy, when this was all over," Roy said as he limped to Deeks' side. "The Doucets are sneakin' it in as we speak. More'n enough for all of us."

"And I brought the scotch," Hetty said, pulling a bottle out of a shopping bag by her feet. "You gentlemen have earned it."

Plastic cups were passed around and filled with scotch, their smiles slowly fading as Roy lifted his for a toast.

"To Oscar Doucet," he said solemnly.

"And to Joe Atwood," Deeks added.

"To Jimmy Hale...may he rest in peace," Callen offered, smiling softly at Deeks.

"And to his big brother Jake," Deeks said quietly. "The toughest sonofabitch in the swamp. Thanks for having my back, brother."

"To true brotherhood," Sam boomed out as Gus Doucet and several of his brothers crowded in carrying a huge pot between them.

The spicy smell of the gumbo filled the room, making Deeks' mouth water and his stomach growl, helping him to forget, at least for the moment, the foulness he left behind.

...

...

The Bighorn mountains loomed in the distance as the jet made its approach into Laramie, and he suddenly became excited by the snow on Cloud Peak. He couldn't wait to get off the plane. As comfortable as it was, everything on it reminding him of Pierce and his yacht, his horror-filled night there never far from his mind. Elan had tried to distract him, and so had Callen when he wasn't sleeping, but he'd remained restless during most of the flight.

He'd gone through Hetty's debrief fairly easily, but had grown angry during a second one that the DOJ had insisted upon. Hetty had been barred from that one, the panel of six questioning every decision he and Callen had made while they were undercover, never quite understanding the kind of man Antoine Guidry had been. One of them didn't believe Harrison White would do the kind of things he claimed to have suffered under his hand, berating him until Terrance Rigby burst into the room and slammed a full transcript of White's interrogation on the table, including a medical report on the cocktail of drugs they had pumped into his system. That had silenced a couple of them briefly, until someone asked for clarification on Guidry's death, one member suggesting that they only had his word that the man was dead at all, and that maybe he had become enthralled with the charismatic leader and had simply let Guidry escape with no one the wiser since he was the only witness.

It had taken him a few seconds to digest that accusation, but when he caught his breath he went on a tirade that ended with him suggesting they send a tactical squad to Blue Bayou to hunt down all the gators and cut open their stomachs until they found Guidry's remains, which he also suggested might still be recognizable. It had earned him a stay in a small windowless room with a metal table and chair, four guards dressed in camo fatigues and a visit from a weird little psychiatrist who was sent to discover if he'd gone crazy. He'd had a little fun with that, until the man caught on to his silliness and stormed out. The guards never cracked a smile.

They left him there for so long he thought the DOJ might be considering filing charges against him, so he was relieved when the door opened and he was ushered back into the interrogation room. He ventured a smile when he saw Hetty standing stiffly in front of the two members who had rigorously disputed some of his testimony and questioned his allegiance. She was dressed in a dark blue suit with her hands clasped tightly in front of her, and he swore later to Callen that there was steam coming out of her ears and fire out of her mouth as she read the two of them the riot act. He found himself unable to keep from grinning cockily as she cut them down to her size, but his smile quickly disappeared when the door opened to admit the Attorney General of the United States. That was definitely a surprise. So was the man's announcement that there was no need for further questioning and that he was free to go. Most members of the panel looked dutifully contrite under his intense scrutiny, but a couple seemed slightly pissed when the Attorney General came over to shake his hand and thank him for foiling a serious attempt on his life. The man personally ushered him and Hetty out of the room, and Deeks grinned widely when she used a gesture to indicate the twisting of a knife. That was Elan's favorite part of the story.

"Snow in August?" Callen asked with a wide yawn as the plane descended toward the airport. "Be nice not to wake up drenched in sweat."

"Think they'll be any repercussions from our debriefings?" Deeks asked.

"Yours maybe," he said, looking quite serious. "I was a perfect gentleman. You on the other hand now have a reputation as a troublemaker."

"Seriously? You told me you were drugged up on pain meds the whole time," Deeks said, wondering if he was joking.

"Your point?"

"Do you even remember what you said?"

"That's their job," Callen reasoned. "I just answered yes or no most of the time."

"You don't remember the questions either do you?" Deeks asked, his grin widening.

"Again...not my job," he said with a smart-ass smile. "Now, can we get off the plane?"

He hadn't even realized the plane had stopped taxiing, and suddenly felt elated, jumping up and grabbing both their go-bags while Elan helped Callen up and guided him down the stairs to the tarmac. Deeks stood in the doorway of the small jet just watching, his eyes moving slowly over each one of the people who meant so much to him. Elan picked up Lily and swung her around and then held her close as he pulled his son Soldier to him. His uncle, Jim Littleshield stood behind him, slowly patting him on the back while George wrapped Callen in a gentle hug that he surprisingly didn't resist. He didn't see Diane or little Chris, but Joe was standing just outside the private terminal shielding his eyes from the sun with a new cowboy hat, his hand trembling slightly when he caught his eye.

"You comin' down, son?" George called out.

The gentle tone brought tears to his eyes and he dropped his head, savoring the moment, before slowly walking down the steps to solid ground. The air was warm, but there was a soft breeze blowing, and he took a deep breath, so very thankful to be home. George hugged him as if he might break and the contrast with Guidry struck him hard and he choked back tears.

"It's so good to have you home, son," George said. "Kensi's waitin' at the ranch with Di and Christopher."

"How's Joe?"

"Been pretty quiet," George replied, looking uncertain and worried. "Don't talk about what he went through. Spends a lot of time with the horses. I think he's scared. I know he was for you and for Callen. Maybe things will get better now. He needs you, son."

Deeks nodded absently at the others as he walked resolutely toward his brother, who had stepped back into the shadow of the overhang. He held his hat in front of him with both hands as if to protect himself. Deeks had never seen him this way before, and it shook him. Joe had always been a vibrant and energetic man, with an inner strength that matched his father's. Now he seemed tentative and unsure. When he got closer, he saw that his unshaven face was streaked with tears and he hurried to get to him.

"Hey, brother," he said as he wrapped him in a hug. "I'm safe, Joe. I'm okay. So's Callen."

Joe pulled free of him, holding onto his arms as he stared into his eyes, searching for something, but he had no idea what.

"I may be a basket case, but I can still tell when you're lying," Joe said angrily.

"Did I do something to piss you off, Joe?"

"Just don't try and tell me you're fine," he said, sounding surly and nothing like himself. "I spent a month with that crazy sonofabitch, so don't tell me he didn't get inside your head. And don't tell me he didn't scare the shit out of you or beat it out of you either. I was there, Deeks. I know. So do me a favor, little brother, don't feed me any crap about being fine and dandy, because I know you're not, cause neither am I."

Deeks swallowed the sour taste in his mouth and quickly looked away. He never could hide anything from Joe, but he wasn't ready to talk about Guidry, even to him.

"You drivin'?" Deeks asked. "Need to see Kensi."

"Yeah, sure. Put me off until you're screamin' out nightmares..."

"Hey! Shut the fuck up, couyon," he yelled in his face and Joe hit him.

It wasn't hard, and he was more stunned by what he'd called him, spitting blood out of his mouth along with the nasty taste of his bitter fear. Joe looked stricken by what he'd done and reached out for him, but he stumbled away from him, and ran right into Elan and Callen.

"That's enough from both of you," George said firmly as he walked up to them. "Let's get home. You can tear into each other after supper, if that'll solve anything."

"Come on Uncle Deeks. You can ride with Lily and me," Soldier said, looking worried as he took his arm. "She'll beat everybody back. Kensi can't wait to see you."

He let Soldier lead him away, grateful to the boy for pulling him out of a confrontation he didn't have the energy for.

"He didn't mean it, mon ami," Lily said as he settled into the backseat. "You know that."

"He understands, Marty," Jim Littleshield said gently. "Closing yourself off like he's been doin' don't work. Now that you're all home together you can work things out. The ranch has always been a haven for you. Let it heal what's hurtin'."

He was quiet as he watched the rest of them pile into George's old Ford Explorer and head out. "Doesn't seem to have helped Joe."

"He put off dealing with his own pain waitin' to see if there'd be more," the old Arapaho said. "Don't think he thought you'd survive. Callen either. That kind of fear is tough to live with when you're hurtin' as bad as he is."

The trip was nothing but a blur, until they got close to the ranch. As they roared along Little Jack Creek, he rolled the window down and let the high plains air ruffle through his hair. It felt clean and fresh, and the land was golden with low rolling hills wide open to the sky, the dry grasses waving in the gentle wind, and so very different from where he'd just come from. He was grateful Hetty had given them two weeks off to recover, realizing he desperately needed the time to make things right with Joe and deal with the dark residue left from his relationship with Guidry.

When he first caught sight of the ranch, he let out a long sigh and Uncle Jim laughed softly and slid his big rough hand along his shoulder, giving his neck a gentle squeeze of understanding. The old place never seemed to change. The barn looked a little more weathered, and he noticed some of the fences had recently been mended, but the birches still stood sentinel out in the far pasture and the house remained as welcoming as it always had.

"God, it's good to be here," he whispered, searching for his big bay mare, Sheila among the curious horses that raised their heads as they pulled to a stop in the yard.

He laughed at the barking dogs that surrounded him as he got out of the car, drawn back to the memories of his first time here, when Joe was so badly injured and he was filled with guilt. Here they were again, in the one place that would allow them the space they'd need to overcome what this assignment had done to all of them. The only one missing was Sam, but he had a family of his own and they had been waiting to get him back too. Wading through the baying dogs, he was almost knocked over by his yellow Lab, Boo. The big dog was practically smiling, she was so happy, but he was immediately saddened when he saw Joe break away and head out to the barn. He would have followed if Kensi hadn't come out onto the porch and hobbled down the steps on her crutches, her smile wide and her eyes shimmering with barely held tears.

His love for her hit him in a rush, the emotion rolling over him like the waves of the ocean, so overpowering that he was stunned into silence, unable to move. He'd forced himself to keep her out of his thoughts for so long, and he'd succeeded most of the time. Now she stood right in front of him, so beautiful and so real, no longer a dream that came to him in a troubled sleep.

"Hey," she said, dropping one crutch to lay her hand on his chest.

Her touch was electric, sparking the beat of his heart into a headlong race that left him breathless. He stared at her smile, her expression so bright that he couldn't help but compare it to the darkness he'd been living with. There was a purity of spirit about her, an honesty that he'd forgotten somehow while living another man's life. Just being close to her made him feel cleaner, helping him to distance himself from the foul-mouthed thug he'd been for too long.

"God, I've missed you," he whispered. "I didn't know how much until right now."

She didn't say anything as her tears fell, just looked longingly into his eyes as she brushed his tangled hair back and cupped his cheek, kissing him softly as she leaned into him. His first touch was tentative, wanting to be so very gentle with her, to be the opposite of Jimmy Hale, to find some way to be himself again. When she dropped the other crutch, he wrapped her in a tighter embrace, holding her weight so she wouldn't hurt herself. They clung to one another in silence as dogs and family moved around them, leaving them be, locked in their own world of comfort. When they eased away from each other they were alone and he finally smiled and kissed her.

"You look so tired...and skinny," she said. "Diane's making spaghetti for dinner, and Kate Lovejoy is bringing over some sourdough bread and a rhubarb pie for dessert."

"As long as it ain't grits, Sunshine, I'll eat whatever you put in front of me," he laughed.

The soft whinny of a horse made him look toward the barn to see Joe lead a dark sorrel out and mount up. He turned the animal toward the creek and kicked it into a gallop, pushing it into a hard run that made Deeks want to follow.

"He got worse when he found out you and Callen were in the hospital," Kensi said. "He's really scaring Diane. George too."

"I have to go after him, Kens," he said. "Can you tell Elan? Between the two of us, we might be able to find out what's really bothering the idiot."

He picked up her crutches and was guiding her up the steps when Elan came out with Callen right behind him.

"Joe took off," Deeks said quickly as he turned and jumped off the porch. "Is Sheila in the barn?"

"I'm coming too," Callen shouted after them as they trotted to the gate.

"That's not a good idea, Cuz," Elan said, stopping to confront him. "You just got shot four days ago. Forget your arm is still in a sling?"

"Are you saying you think I'll fall off?" Callen asked with no hint of a smile or a smirk.

"He's saying we don't want you to hurt yourself, dumbass," Deeks explained.

"Then saddle a horse for me and help me up," he said as he walked past them out across the pasture. "I'll just sit up there and let the horse do all the work."

"Okay, but if you fall off, I'm not stopping to pick you up," Deeks warned.

"Liar."

"He knows you too well, Marty," Elan said, slapping him on the back as they walked into the barn.

Sheila began kicking the door to her stall as soon as she saw him, the familiar behavior making him smile and feel at home. Elan quickly saddled his black, and then saddled a solid looking Appaloosa for Callen. They were out and onto Joe's trail in less than ten minutes. Elan raced ahead, and Deeks realized they all knew exactly where Joe was going. He saw him splash full speed across the creek and disappear into the willows on the other side, only to reappear and pull up Crow to wait for them. Deeks turned to check on Callen, but he didn't appear to be in distress as they approached the slow moving creek, but he watched him carefully as he urged his horse into the water.

"He's headed to my cabin," Elan said as he led them through the willows and onto a well-worn trail that meandered up into the low hills beyond the creek.

The land was beautiful, the hills rising gently until they overlooked the ranch below. George had deeded fifty acres over to Elan so he and Soldier could have their own place, and Deeks and Callen had helped put the finishing touches on the cabin during their long weekend here just before the op. After passing a stand of spruce, the trail wound past a towering outcropping of rock and they entered a narrow valley dotted with oaks. A rustic looking cabin skirted in fieldstone with a dark green metal roof sat beside a grove of aspen trees. Close by stood an old weathered horse barn built by George's ancestors, and four pintos lined the fence of the attached corral. Joe's sorrel was tied to a post on the porch that wrapped two sides of the cabin, but he wasn't in sight.

"Looks like we found him," Elan said softly as they rode past the corral. "Uncle Jim said he's been staying up here since he found out Guidry was dead."

"Surprised he came to the airport," Deeks said.

"George probably shamed him into it," Elan replied.

"He's got nothing to be ashamed of," Callen said weakly as he rode up behind them.

He tried to get off his horse without help, only to slip from the saddle and tumble onto the ground, crying out when he landed hard on his wounded shoulder. Deeks was beside him in an instant, and Elan cussed softly in Arapaho as they eased him over onto his back and into Deeks' arms.

"Is he hurt?" Joe asked as he slammed out the door of the cabin.

"I'm fine. Just embarrassed," Callen whispered, his eyes squeezed shut against the pain.

"Why'd you two dumbasses let him ride all the way up here?" Joe demanded angrily. "You damn well should know better."

"It's your fault," Callen said softly.

"How the hell is it my fault?" Joe burst out.

"Good question," Deeks murmured.

"We fly all the way here from New Orleans to see you and you just ride off into the sunset without even saying hello," Callen complained. "Did you think we'd just let you do that?"

"I talked to Deeks," he replied softly.

"And then you hit him," Elan pointed out.

"He shouldn't have called me a couyon," Joe spit out, his anger fresh again. "You sounded just like Guidry, you stupid sonofabitch."

Deeks let go of Callen and stumbled to his feet, his hands now in fists as he squared off in front of his brother and screamed at him. "Don't say that, you fuck. You got no right to ever fucking say that."

"You're right. I don't," Joe said, his voice now barely audible. "Cause you and Callen would never have gotten anywhere near that psycho if I hadn't screwed up."

"That's not true, brother," Deeks said softly, taking a step toward him.

Joe held his hand up to stop him, his face drawn with sadness. He turned away from them and untied his horse, but Deeks got to him before he could mount up.

"We're not letting you leave again, Joe," he said as he placed his hands on his shoulders, holding him in place. "We're all staying right here together, and we're gonna work out all the shit we're dealing with. We're brothers and I'll be damned if I let Antoine Guidry tear us apart."

...

...