A/N: Hello! I haven't posted anything in a while, huh? To tell you the truth university's kicking my motivation to the ground a little bit. You know what would help with that a bit? Reviews and comments! I still have so many stories I want to share with you guys, and hearing feedback would really get me motivated to write more! I wrote this up a little while ago and I've finally gotten around to posting it. It's inspired by this one picture; I'll link you guys to it at the bottom! I hope you enjoy~

"Hi there! How can I help you?"

Gilbert broke off from his conversation with Elizaveta to meet pretty purple eyes. He couldn't help but to stare a little bit. The waitress, Madeline, her tag said, had a lovely round face. Chin-length blond hair framed it, waving slightly. Part of it was tied back behind her head, and one flyaway strand looped in front of her face. It bobbed softly as she breathed. Round glasses perched on her straight nose, and those violet eyes twinkled behind them. She wore a short red dress, with little black bows and buttons as accents, and matching red heels. Black stockings hugged her thin legs.

Elizaveta just rolled her eyes and elbowed her companion. "I'm sorry for him. Table for two?"

"Right this way." Madeline giggled, hiding her mirth behind a delicate hand, then turned around and led them to the back of the café. She didn't seem fazed by the staring; she probably got it a lot.

"I like this place already," Gilbert told Elizaveta quietly, eyes fixed on the girl's skirt.

"Oh at least try to be decent, would you?"

"Decent? Liz, this place is called Eye Candy. Aren't they supposed to be hot?"

The brunet sighed, brushing her own long brown hair behind her ear. "Yes, but that doesn't mean you can release your inner Neanderthal. God, next you'll be humping that poor pillow again. Honestly, Gilbert, it can't take much more."

They'd reached their table by then. Gilbert stiffened when he saw Madeline watching them, her eyes twinkling. A small yet somehow innocent smirk curled on her lips. How much had she heard? "I'm not," he told her helpfully.

"Not?" Her head tilted to the side ever so slightly.

"A Neanderthal."

She laughed again, stepping back to allow them to get to their seats. "Well that's good. I'll get you some menus."

"Great." Gilbert turned to Elizaveta and pouted. "Now she thinks I'm an idiot."

Elizaveta only shook her head and took her seat. "You are an idiot. But you need to get laid, and what better place to meet pretty girls than Eye Candy? It's where I met Lili."

"Yeah, but you were the waitress then, not her." Rolling his eyes, Gilbert slumped into his seat. A moment later he was straightening out as Madeline returned, two glossy menus in her hands.

"Here you are. Sorry for the wait."

"It's fine!" Gilbert cleared his throat after the unintended shout. Across the table, Elizaveta was struggling to keep a straight face. He kicked her under the table and flashed Madeline a smile. She just shook her head softly, his lips quirking upwards again, and left.

"Smooth."

"Oh shut it." Gilbert moved his chair across the table a little bit, so he was closer to Elizaveta. "So. What size do you think her boobs are? I can't really see anything that big under there- Hey! Ow!"

Elizaveta raised her menu again, threatening another whack. "Gilbert? Do shut up. You're sounding like a straight douche."

"I am not! I'm just curious, you know? I don't care, I just- Ow! Liz!" At the green glare, Gilbert slumped down and focused on his menu. "Fine. Shutting up now."

"Good boy."

"I'm not a dog."

"You sure act like a horny one sometimes."

"Why you- Oh you know what? Never mind. What do you suggest?"

Five minutes later, Madeline sashayed back towards their table, and Gilbert was still in a slump. Everything sounded good on the menu, and he was having trouble choosing between a hot chocolate, mulled spice coffee, or eggnog. Elizaveta ordered without problems, and he of course froze up when Madeline turned those big doe eyes on him.

"Um."

Elizaveta sighed. "He needs help and won't listen to me."

"Oh." Madeline smiled and stepped closer to Gilbert. The ruffles of her skirt brushed just up against the albino's hip. "Are you having trouble deciding?"

For a moment, Gilbert couldn't speak through the lump in his throat. He finally swallowed it down, then nodded shortly. Had it always been this hot in here? Elizaveta's muffled smiles weren't helping. "Y-Yeah." He quickly pointed out his three selections, hoping she would get the message.

Her eyes lit up, and she leaned down a bit as if to see the choices better. "Hmm..." Her plump lower lip vanished between white teeth, worried as she thought. "I'll let you in on a little secret. We recently got a new hot chocolate recipe and it's to die for. Definitely my favorite for a cold November night like this."

"Really?" Gilbert turned to look at her face in more detail, but then she was standing straight away and stepping back. At her nod, he decided. "I'll have that then."

"Okay." Madeline collected their menus, holding them demurely against her thighs. "Your drinks will be ready soon." Her eyes moved to Gilbert again, and something flashed in her face before she turned around and was gone.

A different waitress brought them their drinks. Her name was Katerina, and she had short blond hair and a massive chest, but the entire time, Gilbert was only thinking of a slight figure with lilac eyes. The rest of the evening seemed duller, and they didn't see Madeline again before they left. Elizaveta made fun of him for pining, but Gilbert wasn't even feeling up to biting back. In the end, the woman just rolled her eyes again and patted him on the shoulder before vanishing into her room in their shared apartment.

Gilbert was back at Eye Candy, alone, two days later. He was greeted by a different waitress, but as he was being led to a table, he saw Madeline emerge from the kitchen. A tray with some cakes was in her hands.

"Hey! Maddie!"

Her eyes widened, and her hands shook so much that she nearly dropped the tray. Looking around, she seemed to relax when she saw Gilbert waving at her, but there was a hint of wariness on her face that refused to go away. She shifted the tray to one hand and waved back before hurrying onwards.

"You know her?"

Gilbert looked at his own waitress. "Yeah. Saw her last time I was here."

No more was said between them. He sat down and pretended to look through the menu while the girl moved away to seat a couple that had just walked in, even though he already knew he was getting the hot chocolate again. Not a couple of moments later, Madeline walked past him.

"Maddie!"

Once again she started, and she was fidgeting with her dress as she turned to him. "Oh. Gilbert, hello."

"Why do you get so startled when I call you that? Honestly, you're like a little birdie."

"It sounds like-" Madeline paused and shook her head. "I'm just not used to someone calling me by nickname here. It throws me off a bit."

"Yeah, I can see that. It's nice to see you, though. What happened the other day?"

"Oh, that. Um." She dropped her head, fingers brushing through her hair. "The kitchen just got busy all of a sudden."

Gilbert found the movements completely adorable, so he wasn't paying attention to her stutters. He just grinned. "Yeah, I get ya."

Madeline's shoulders dropped a little bit, and she pulled out a notepad. "So, are you ready to order?"

"Hot chocolate. Like last time."

"You liked it that much?" Madeline lit up at that, a smile spreading across her face.

Gilbert couldn't look away from it. He'd crushed on a lot of people in his lifetime, but damn there was something different about this. Whereas before his stomach would just flop about a little bit, now he was filled with warmth all over just seeing that smile. "I did."

His words only made Madeline's happiness grow. She leaned down again. "I'll tell you another secret. You know how I said it was a new recipe?"

"Yeah?" Gilbert was hanging on to her every word.

"I brought it with me when I started working here. It was my grandma's, and they let me try it out. So I'm glad you liked it so much."

"I loved it..."

It was then that Madeline looked clearly into his face. She seemed to see for the first time just how lovestruck Gilbert really was. Her eyes widened minutely and her face closed off again. A charming smile was plastered on her features, but it was different to the one from moments before. "I- I'm glad. I'll just go take this to the kitchen." She hurried off before Gilbert could say anything else.

The albino was left blinking after her. Had he said something wrong? Was he coming on too strong? Another girl brought him his chocolate again, and he drank it quickly before leaving. His mood had definitely soured.

He visited the café a lot over the next many weeks, and each visit made him fall for Madeline even more. He loved the way she moved throughout the café, her quiet confidence shining through in her steps, loved her smiles whenever he saw them and how she treated everyone who walked through the door with the same kindness and respect. She flirted quite a bit with everyone in the café, and though at first Gilbert had gotten jealous, he soon realized that she was doing it unconsciously. Brushing her hair behind her ears, tilting her head and smiling, smoothing out or adjusting her skirt, they were all natural movements to her that just happened to be flirtatious. He watched her as much as he could, all the while sipping cups of the delicious hot chocolate.

Yet at the same time Gilbert was trying to get closer, inexplicably, Madeline was trying to distance herself away. Only a few times in his many visits did she take him to his table or serve him. He tried to make small talk, and she would answer openly up to a point, but after that she always made herself scarce. Sometimes he would only catch glimpses of her as she flitted about, living up to the nickname of 'Birdie', as Gilbert liked to sometimes refer to her (to which she had blushed adorably much the first time she heard it, then hurried off in a tizzy), and a few times he didn't see her at all.

"I don't understand it," a waitress muttered one time, scowling softly in Madeline's direction as she placed Gilbert's customary cup in front of him. By now the waitresses all knew him there, and knew his order.

"Don't understand what?"

The girl looked startled, clearly not having noticed saying the words aloud, and then huffed. "Madeline. All the boys – and some girls – fall at her feet, and she flirts, yet she never pursues anyone. A goddamn tease she is." Shaking her head, she stalked off.

"Hey, Birdie!" Gilbert called out to her as soon as she walked by him a few minutes later.

Faint blush rising to her face, Madeline stopped. "Yes? Do you want anything else?"

"I just wanna know how you are." Gilbert grinned softly. It was different to his usual confident smirk. He wanted Madeline to know that he was genuinely interested, and that she could trust him.

Madeline smiled back a little bit, but it was still too hesitant for his liking. "I'm okay. I have to get back to work though. If you'll excuse me-" She hurried off again.

When Gilbert was leaving that night, Madeline came up to him and pressed a napkin into his hand before quickly striding away. He didn't even have the time to call for her. Stepping out into the evening, his heart leapt up as he unfolded it. A number? But no. His brow furrowed as he stared down at the napkin. On it were written two sentences. Two short sentences that confused Gilbert to high hell.

I'm a trap. Don't fall for me.

A trap? Still puzzled, Gilbert looked through the window into the café. Madeline bustled around the back, nothing out of the ordinary about her. How was she a trap? He tried to work out the cryptic message as he walked home, and even with Liz later, but they couldn't make sense or reason out of it. When Gilbert went to sleep that night, the napkin lay on his desk.

Gilbert didn't have to puzzle about it too long. He found out what was going on the very next time he went into the café, about two months after Elizaveta had first shown it to him. He was sitting in the back corner, typing out an email to his brother on his phone, when from the front of the café he heard a scream and the shattering of china. Leaping to his feet, he looked around and his eyes widened when he saw what was going on.

Madeline stood before a table with an older man seated at it, the man about forty years old. A tray lay smashed at her feet, splatters of coffee over the floor and her shoes and her legs. The front of her red dress was ripped and hanging off of her, some of the fabric in the man's clenched hand. It was all in tatters down her front, revealing her very...masculine chest.

Horror spread over 'Madeline's' face, and he tried to step back. Remains of the coffee cup crunched under his heels, and that seemed to shake the older man out of his shock.

"What the fuck is this?!" he screamed, rising up.

Madeline scrambled back, trying to cover up his chest. "P-Please sir-" The voice was a tiny bit deeper, and cracked with fear.

"You're a boy? What the fuck? Fucking tramp, how dare you deceive everyone?!"

The whole café was frozen. Gilbert's jaw dropped as everything came together. Madeline's flat chest. The hesitance. The 'trap'. Madeline was actually a boy, just dressing up as a girl and working here. Unfortunately, he couldn't have the time to properly think everything through. The man was still screaming profanities, and as Gilbert started moving, his hand rose in the air.

"You little fucker, I'll teach you a fucking lesson-"

Madeline flinched and ducked down as the hand came closer, but the blow never landed. He opened his eyes, shocked to see Gilbert standing in front of him.

"Hey, asshole." Gilbert's voice was low in fury, and he sent the man sprawling. "You're the pervert here, ripping off his dress like that. This is a café, not some nightclub."

"And who the fuck are you? The tramp's lover boy?"

"Nah. But I'm not a perverted asshole like you are."

"Why you little shit-" He took a swing at Gilbert, but the albino ducked and knocked him out instead.

Shaking out his fist, he stepped to the side and pulled out his phone, dialing for the police. At the same time, a few of the other girls came forwards and tugged Madeline to the kitchen. The other people in the café slowly returned to their drinks and food, but hushed murmurs ran around the rooms. By the time Gilbert was done talking to the officer, Madeline was nowhere to be seen. The man was taken away, and Gilbert gave the story without revealing Madeline's real gender. He looked to the kitchen once more, then left the café.

There was a bench a few feet down the street from the café, out of view of anyone inside of it. Gilbert sat there, waiting for it to close and everyone to come out. As his heart rate calmed down and his body cooled off from the adrenaline rush he started shivering, but he was too deep in thought to really pay attention to the cold. About an hour and a half later, the café's doors were locked and the lights started going out. Madeline emerged moments later from a side door in the small alley next to the café, bundled up in a large kitchen apron and his coat. He turned into the opposite direction from Gilbert, walking quickly away with his head down. He was still wearing those heels.

"Birdie!" Gilbert jumped up and immediately followed.

Madeline's head whipped around, and his eyes widened before he broke into a run. Fast as he was in his heels, Gilbert still caught him after a few seconds' chase. His hand wrapped around Madeline's arm to pull him to a halt, though he released the limb when he noticed Madeline flinching.

"Hey. Hey, Birdie, it's okay."

"What- What are you still doing here?" The voice was definitely different now. Definitely a man's voice, but still lighter and more ethereal than most he'd heard.

"I was waiting for you. I just want to talk."

"For over an hour?" Madeline shook his head. Tears dampened his eyes, and he quickly reached behind his glasses to dash them away. "Look, thank you for your help back there, but I really don't need you to make fun of me now that we're alone."

"What?" Gilbert crossed his arms. "I don't- I don't wanna make fun of you. I've had some time to think on that bench and- I'm still interested."

"What?!" Madeline stepped back, mouth hanging open. "But you- But you're-"

"Bisexual?"

"Oh."

"Yeah. And c'mon, there's gotta be one hell of a story behind how you got that job. I really want to get to know you better, Madeline."

"Matthew."

"Huh?"

"My name. It's Matthew."

Gilbert grinned. "Well then Matthew, Mr. Trap, it's nice to meet you."

Blushing heavily, Matthew averted his eyes. "You really want to get to know me more?"

"Uh, I just said that like a minute ago. Come on, it's freezing and I'd rather not lose my nose to frostbite."

Matthew chuckled softly, and brushed a strand of hair behind his ear. "Come on, then. My place isn't too far away, and some fresh hot chocolate is the least I could do for you for what you did today. I didn't get a chance to thank-"

"Yeah, yeah, we can get to that when we're warm and have hot chocolate in front of us." Gilbert grinned, unable to help his heart skipping a beat at Matthew's actions. Boy or not, Matthew was still incredibly cute.

"Okay. Follow me, then."

Ten minutes later, they were in the cozy warmth of Matthew's small apartment. They'd settled in the kitchen, Gilbert at the table while Matthew stirred a pot of hot chocolate on his stove. The albino smiled as he looked around at the décor. It was simple, yet efficient with a few personal touches here and there. He liked it.

"So, Birdie."

"Thank you." Matthew turned around, hot chocolate momentarily forgotten and a look of urgency on his face. "For what you did. That man. He-" He shuddered, hands moving up to shield his chest. "I saw him looking at me when he came in but I never thought he'd do something like that... I was so scared and then you- You were there..."

"Birdie..." Gilbert was instantly standing, though he didn't reach out to touch the other man yet. "Well of course I wasn't going to let him hit you. Fucking perv, he was probably trying to feel up your chest, right?"

"Y-Yeah..." Matthew nodded, taking a step closer to Gilbert but looking unsure himself.

After a moment, Gilbert sat down again. Matthew seemed to look disappointed, but he turned around to tend to the hot chocolate before Gilbert could get a good look. "So, Matthew. Tell me a little more about yourself?"

"Okay." Matthew talked as he watched the chocolate. "So I went to university in Canada, and when I came back my brother Alfred helped me find an apartment and look for a job. That Halloween, I lost a bet and Alfred made me dress up in a girl's costume and look the part of a girl wearing it. I was convincing, and then we saw an ad for work in the café and he talked me into trying for the position as a girl. People seemed to like me, and it kind of just spiraled from there." He brought the cups of steaming chocolate to the table, placing one before Gilbert.

"Whoa..."

"Yeah. About a month after working there, one of the girls on the staff found out about me. She brought it to the others, but they decided that since the customers liked me so much, I could stay and it would just be a heavily guarded secret. And then you came."

Gilbert blinked. "Me? What did I do?"

"You fell for me," Matthew mumbled, tracing the rim of his mug. "I saw it and tried to stop it, but you were just so damn persistent and then I started falling a little bit too but I thought that you only liked Madeline and that's why I was jumpy when you called me 'Maddie' because it sounds a little like 'Mattie' and I thought you knew-"

"Hold the phone."

"Wh- What?" Matthew blinked, looking at Gilbert warily.

"Rewind a little bit."

"Maddie sounds like Mattie?"

"Even more."

"You were persistent?"

"No, no, in the middle."

Matthew understood what Gilbert was getting at and grew hot-coal red. "I- I started falling too..."

A slow grin spread over Gilbert's face. "You did?"

"Y-Yes. Part of the reason I was avoiding you."

"Oh my God. Oh my God oh my fucking God-"

"Gilbert? Are you all right?"

"Oh Birdie... Birdie, Birdie, Birdie." The smile grew and Gilbert stood up again. "I'm perfect. Can I hug you?"

Matthew smiled as well, and pushed the chair away from the table. "Go ahead."

Gilbert swooped in, picking Matthew up and hugging him tight. "This is awesome," he whispered into Matthew's ear. "You're awesome. Please go out with me?"

"I think I'd have to be stupid to say no." Feeling a slight breeze between his legs, Matthew suddenly shifted. "Um. Maybe I should get out of the dress now though?"

"Heh, I think you look hot in it," Gilbert replied, grinning. His hands slid down teasingly, but before they could get too low he brought them up again and released his hold.

Matthew only blushed again and smacked at his arm. "Oh hush, you."

"Really. And the heels? Like damn, you sure can own them."

"Stop it! You flirt! Just- Just stay there!" Laughing and hiding his face, Matthew ran out of the room. When he returned about ten minutes later, he was composed and wearing a sweatshirt and some sweatpants. "Come on, now. We have hot chocolate and you should be getting home soon."

"Okay. And what do you say for Friday for our date? You can learn more about my life and how awesome I am, and how awesome of a boyfriend I'm gonna be."

Matthew smiled as he curled his fingers around the handle of his mug. "That sounds perfect."

A/N: Yay and there's the end of it! I was inspired by this picture:

post/128724471086/akanedee-hes-gonna-trick-you-good-oh-yeahhh (It's on my tumblr blog whymsical-for-you. Just pop that in and then the post/ stuff and you should get it!)

I'm hoping to write more often now, but we'll see how that goes.