Chapter 36: The Storm is Still Not Over:

My name is Miles Prower! But everyone calls me Tails!

Well, after chapters and chapters of fluff that had nothing to do

with me, I'm finally back! ...And it seems that my current situation

isn't the best (Thanks a lot, writers!), as my Sunday chore for this

week is cooking dinner for Monday through Thursday! And I can't

do that until the one in charge of grocery-shopping (that would be

Rouge) comes back, and she still has yet to arrive! Seriously, Sonic,

WHY did you have to give us chores that rely heavily on other chores?!

It was 5:00pm. Back at the mansion, Tails was anxiously pacing around the kitchen.

"Seriously, where's Rouge? I need to cook!" He groaned.

After what seemed like another hour of waiting, Rouge finally appeared and set the groceries down on the kitchen table without a word.

"Well there you are! I was about to go and buy the ingredients myself!" Tails exclaimed.

Rouge did not respond and hurriedly went into her bedroom. Tails shrugged and started unpacking the grocery bags.

However, this was not the only commotion going on.

In the living room, Sonic and Knuckles were on the sofa looking at Sonic's laptop.

"Alright, let's see what all this 'Sonic Boom' nonsense is about." Sonic said, clicking on a link.

An article popped up, showing information about the upcoming sub-series called Sonic Boom, as well as pictures of Sonic, Tails, Knuckles and Amy's new redesigns for it. Sonic and Knuckles' jaws dropped.

"Um, what's with the hair-do?" Sonic asked, puzzled.

"...And why do I look like I'm on steroids?" Knuckles pondered.

"And what's with all the bandages?" The two friends asked in unison.

"This can't be right." Sonic said, "We never did that on any of our adventures, and I'm sure none of us ever looked like that either."

"I see your point there, Sonic, but my theory is that maybe they're finally coming up with their own ideas instead of retelling our adventures." Knuckles said.

"You might be right, but those redesigns are still shit!" Sonic replied, "Come on, we have to show em' to the others!"

Sonic printed out individual photos of the redesigns and he and Knuckles proceeded to fast-walk out of the living room.

I'm Amy Rose! I'm cute and I'm full of energy!

For the most part, today's been pretty chill for me! My

Sunday chore was to tend the Chao Garden, but since

Chao are herbivorous, all I had to do was pull some crabgrass

here and there, which are the only plant that they're unable to

eat without falling gravely ill. Yup, you heard right! The

motherfuckers can eat rotten fruit from the ground, eat roses

without picking the thorns off, and even digest poison sumac,

yet crabgrass won't stay down! Sadly though, my good buzz

was ruined when Jr. got covered in mud while he helped me,

and he put up such a big fight when I tried to clean him! I think

the dad from "Calvin and Hobbes" said it best: Being a parent is

wanting to hug your kid and strangle him at the same time! ...Er,

I THINK I said it right!

Soaking wet, Amy stepped out of the bathroom after bathing an uncooperative Sonic Jr. The young hedgehog waddled out of the bathroom wearing a hooded towel that resembled Knuckles, and attempted to climb his mother's leg.

"You! Go see Daddy!" Amy said, somewhat sternly.

As if he had suddenly regained his obedience, Sonic Jr. ran from the room at a speed almost as high as his father's. The naked Amy proceeded to go through the dresser for something to change into, though it was completely empty.

"Ugh, where is Blaze with the laundry!?" She groaned.

Without warning, Sonic and Knuckles barged into the room holding the photographs they had printed out earlier.

"Amy! You won't believe...oh..." Sonic said, noticing what he had walked in on.

Amy let out a high-pitched scream and quickly grabbed a wet bath towel from the floor to cover up with, but Sonic and Knuckles had already fallen flat on their backs, their eyes replaced with hearts.

"Out! Out! Get the hell out!" Amy scolded, knocking them into the hallway with her hammer and slamming the door.

The two soon regained their composure and looked at each other.

"Whoops!" They said in unison.

"Well, I guess we should tell Tails first." Sonic suggested.

The two friends got up and went to find him. Shortly after they had left, Amy came out of the room still wrapped in a towel, for there were no more clothes in the dresser. She went into the laundry room and found that the reason the laundry had not been put away yet was because Blaze was asleep in the laundry basket.

"So that's what took you so long." Amy said, lightly kicking the basket, slowly shaking Blaze awake.

"What happened?" She asked, looking up at Amy, who was standing over her.

"You fell asleep in the laundry basket again." Amy answered.

"Ugh, I know, I know, but I just couldn't resist, and I never can!" Blaze said, getting up.

Amy grabbed the laundry basket for herself.

"Well I can tell you this: You're not doing the laundry ever again, until you break that habit." She replied.

After gathering her own clothes out of the basket and getting dressed, Amy carried the rest of the laundry down the hall, her plan being to drop clothes off at each bedroom. She cut through the living room to reach the other side of the house. Upon reaching the other hallway, she heard crying once again.

After looking around for a second, Amy slowly cracked the door to Shadow and Rouge's room, and saw that Rouge was upset again. She was sitting in the bathroom, the stress bottle in one hand and a pregnancy test in the other. Rouge noticed Amy peeking in.

"You can come in." She said, not looking up.

Amy cautiously entered the room and closed the door behind her. Setting the laundry basket on the bed, she asked: "What is it this time?"

"It's hopeless..." Rouge replied, shedding a tear as large as a silver dollar, "IT'S FUCKING HOPELESS!"

"What's hopeless?" Amy asked, concerned.

Rouge tossed yet another newspaper at her. The featured article was titled, "THE PROMISCUOUS BAT IS AT IT AGAIN". It showed a color photograph of Rouge flirting the free sweetbreads from the meat man.

"Yikes!" Amy said, looking back up from the paper.

"And they chased me around town after that, and it took forever to shake them off!" Rouge added.

"So that's why Tails was bitching about you not showing up." Amy replied, proceeding to sort Rouge's clothes out of the basket.

Rouge took an obscenely large gulp from her stress bottle, decreasing its remaining contents by half, and bawled some more.

Wanting to avoid commenting on Rouge's outlandish wardrobe, Amy asked: "So, out the corner of my eye, I'm seeing a pregnancy test. Why?"

Rouge snapped out of her misery for a bit.

"Oh that? Shadow and I...well, y'know!" She said, her eyes anxiously darting back to the pregnancy test before falling on the stress bottle again.

"Mm-hmm! Well, good luck finding any results if you keep drinking yourself sick like that!" Amy warned, not looking up from the laundry.,"Oh, and by the way, I think Tails said that he was reserving that cooking wine for whatever he's making."

"Well first of all, this is orange liqueur, not cooking wine. Secondly, if there's one thing you should know about me, it's that I never drink cheap alcohol! And neither did my ancestors!" Rouge replied.

{A cutaway began showing a bat who resembled Rouge (though this took place many years ago) walking into an old-fashioned bar. She was wearing a long-sleeved black and white striped shirt that exposed her midriff along with black knee-length pants and high heels, and a red beret that covered one of her ears. "Hey zere, handsome! Vhat do you recommend?" The bat asked the bartender as she sat on the stool in a suggestive pose. "Vell, vee have Sauvignon Blanc - 1947." The bartender replied. "Hmm. Vell how much is zis 'Sauvignon Blanc' you speak of?" The bat asked. "Zat will be 2 pesos a glass." The bartender replied. "Vhat!? Alright, I am out! Au revoir!" The bat replied, fast walking out of the bar.}

"Wait, your family's French?" Amy asked.

"Nah, it was just something I added in there. I always used to tell men that so they'd get even more attracted to me." Rouge replied.

"Okay, please no more cutaways!" Amy requested.

"But seriously, how else can I get over the fact that these dicks are ruining my life!?" Rouge asked, reverting back to her somber state.

"Hmm, maybe I could show you some of the unwanted photos I was in. Be right back!" Amy suggested, dropping a wine-colored G-string she was holding onto the bed and running to her own room.

She returned in less than five minutes with a stack of old newspapers. She flipped through the pile for a bit until she found a number of the pictures she was looking for. Interested, Rouge sat on the bed as well.

"So this first one is me at my wedding." Amy started, spreading all the images out on the comforter, "And then the next one is when someone saw me and Sonic in public while six months pregnant."

Rouge looked through all the images and came across one that intrigued her the most.

"Um, what's that one?" She asked.

"Yeah, that one was shot when Sonic saved me from Dr. Eggman. Apparently someone got a look up my dress as we flew down to Earth...that's nothing new though." Amy replied somewhat sheepishly.

The two girls shared a brief laugh. Once again, Rouge's sobs were reduced to sniffles.

"So don't worry. They're not singling you out. They did this stuff to the rest of us too!" Amy added, getting up and taking the laundry to everyone else's rooms, "Oh, and feel free to look through the rest of those!"