A/N: Ten days. It's been ten days. But guess what? I FINISHED ALL MY EXAMS AND I PASSED EVERY SINGLE SUBJECT WHEEE. Actually, the only subjects I was worried about was Math B and Math C, but I PASSED. YAY! Claire might have one assignment left but she's pretty much finished and everything is happy and awesome and whee. And we have a hundred more prompts to get through and we have goals and we're writing and sldgh;saglksh;lhg YAY

Rating: M

Burt stared down at the phone, not entirely sure he'd read the message right.

(18:09) Blaine - You home yet? I'll start without you if you aren't careful.

The phone beeped in his hand and another message appeared on the screen.

(18:11) Blaine - I'm going to make you come just as hard as I did last night.

Burt dropped the phone, his fingers suddenly refusing to work. Oh Dear God. Kurt made his way downstairs, smiling sweetly.

"Did I leave my...?" he started to ask, spotting his phone on the couch where Burt had dropped it. "Oh!"

Burt was beet red, his eyes wide. He couldn't meet his son's eyes as Kurt picked up his phone.

To Kurt's credit, he managed to keep a straight face as he went through his messages before disappearing back upstairs

Burt felt sick.

"Carole!"

^.^

"You can't do anything Burt, he's legal." Carole said calmly, taking a sip of her tea as Burt paced.

"But he's having sex!"

"With a boy he loves and trusts."

"He's still just a kid Carol, he's not old enough to be making decisions like... like this!"

"Burt, he's eighteen."

Burt sighed heavily, dropping into a kitchen chair.

"I can't actually do anything can I?" He asked. "I can't ground them, or scold them, or-"

"No. I'm sure Kurt knows what he's doing." Carole told him, taking another mouthful of her tea to hide her smile.

Suddenly Burt sat up straight, eyes alight.

"What are you planning?" she asked suspiciously.

^.^

"Now boys." Burt had them sat at the kitchen table.

They eyed each other nervously, neither of them sure what they'd done.

"As..." Burt took a deep breath. "As your relationship progresses, you generally tend to get intimate, as you boys have."

Kurt was already blushing, staring at where his hands were clenched together on the table, and Blaine was staring at Burt with wide eyes, cringing back into his chair.

"Dad!" Kurt tried to get him to stop. "We haven't... I mean, we're not..." Kurt sighed, falling quiet as his blush deepened. So he knew. But how had he found out! They were always so quiet and careful!

Burt cleared his throat nervously.

Outside the closed door, Finn was arguing with Carole.

"But mum, Burt said it was a boy's talk!"

"Finn, you really don't want to go in there." Carole said firmly.

"But..."

"They're having a special talk about Kurt and Blaine's relationship."

Finn's mouth shut quickly. "Oh."

"Dad, please stop." Kurt squeezed his eyes shut in mortification as Burt pulled several boxes of condoms from a shopping bag.

"Protection is important." Burt paused, his eyes widening slightly. "I don't, ah, have to teach you how to use them?"

"Oh god no. We've used them be-" Blaine began flippantly. "Oh my god." He hissed, flushing in embarrassment at what he'd almost let slip.

Burt chose to ignore Blaine's comment.

"That's everything!" Kurt said quickly, attempting to save them from further awkwardness.

"But I haven't-"

"Dad! No! We get it! We really do!"

"Okay...okay.. I'll leave you two boys to think about everything I just said." Burt finished as he stood up from his chair, leaving the room.

Kurt dropped his head onto the table with a thunk.

They sat in an uncomfortable silence for a few minutes.

"Kurt..." Blaine said quietly, his eyes still wide in horror. "Did your dad just give us a sex talk?"

A/N: Happy days, are heeerrreee aaagggaaiinnn