Chapter 11 - Ionia.

I was in Ionia.

After many days my journey it's done, before me lied the so-called city of peace, in this city-state I hope I can find the answers to my questions, I've heard in Ionia peace was a way of life, Ionians avoided aggressive actions, their forte was diplomacy, I also heard they are seekers of balance, evil and good forces must be equal to achieve paradise, neither the light nor the darkness but both at the same time, I was surprised when I found out green humans belonged here, I guess Ionians also seek perfection in every aspect of their lives, even in war.

Cho'Gath said Ionians were scholars when it came to hard subjects such as feelings, of course, my main goal is the stork, but I guess I could learn a few things here, human feelings are a mystery, I know some of them, but they are different, I'm not sure how to explain it just yet, I guess I need more knowledge and experience.

As we enter the port I had to hide inside a crate, according to Sarah even if I had the recommendation from Ashe the best course of action is to conceal my existence, at least until the elders were notified, it was logical, even if Ionia is known for its acceptance over species, a voidborn is way too much, testing their creed would be..."unhealthy" if I'm wrong, so from my hiding spot I study the environment, I really want to go outside, everything is new for me, but I must be patient, just let them eat your stacks.

Yes, the city of enlightenment, the city of the wise, the city of peace...

- JUSTICE!

Then, why the hell...?

- PLOT!

Are there two parties arguing in the middle of the main street?

- YOU FOOLISH FOLLOWERS OF SACKS OF FAT! REPENT ON YOUR SINS! FOLLOW THE TRUE JUSTICE!

- SO MUCH WORDS FOR SUCH A SORRY CHEST! BE GONE AND CUT YOUR VEGETABLES ON IT!

...

Every time I have hope...humans prove me wrong.

One of the parties was holding a monument with two mountain-looking things, they were also wearing some shirts with "PLOT" written on it, the other party was holding a similar monument, but the mountain-like things were smaller, their shirts had "JUSTICE" on it.

- THE TRUTH LIES WITHIN US! DON'T BE FOOLED BY THOSE SAGGY TITS! - A guy wearing some strange-looking googles shouted.

- WANNA HAVE A GO, LOLICON? - A bald monk with his eyes covered retorted.

I watched the two men argue, curious, yes, their motive was quite foolish, but I was curious about what fuels the human passion, even if the reason it's stupid there is always something to look up to, so, from my crate I reach and poke Ahri in her side, she and Sarah are escorting me to the main palace of Ionia.

- Ah! - She yelps surprised - Oh, My! Come on, Cutie, I know you can do better than that.

- I just want to ask you something, Why are those guys arguing?

- Curious, are we? - she giggles - They are fighting the oldest battle between men, with their pride at stake, their beliefs. their dreams, their...

- Alright - I decided to ignore her - Sarah, can you tell me, please?

- They are idiots, that's all - she says bluntly.

- I don't understand.

- There is nothing to understand, it's a guy thing, now, shut up, if someone finds out about you, we will be in deep shit.

- come on Sarah - Ahri said at her - don't be like that, he just wants to know.

- don't care, the sooner I get a rid of him the better, now, both of you, silence.

Her sharp words hurt me, I knew Sarah was one of those humans who would hate me just because I exist, I don't blame her, humans are coward creatures, well, most of them, they are afraid of things they can't understand or can't control, I understand, she won't change, no matter how much I try, she will always hate me, it's fine, this won't bring me down, I understand.

I sighed, I really wanted to be her friend.

Suddenly I felt a chill in my limbs, there was a strong killing aura, I scan the area looking for it, then I realize it's coming from the two guys that caught my interest, they are looking...well, I'm not sure if they are looking at each other but they are definitely facing each other...anyways, they are facing each other with bloodlust.

- I guess this was unavoidable, Master Yi - the bald man said cracking his knuckles.

- Let's end this like the men we are, Lee Sin - Master Yi said wielding a sword.

- I shall end your puny life, it will be easy, you lolicon bastard.

-Wuju explain yourself?

- was that supposed to be a pun?

-Yeah! whaddya think?

- Holee Sin! You are bad!

- ...dude, seriously?

- Enough, we shall begin the greatest civil war in Ionia, PREPARE YOURSELF! - Lee Sin roared charging against Yi.

-WE SHALL BATHE THE CITY IN CRIMSON RED! - Yi yelled swinging his sword.

As the two men were about to collide I saw a brilliant dot in the sky, suddenly two blades crashed between them, surprised by the sudden attack they looked around them, from the sky I heard a roar, I looked up and saw something falling towards us, as it got closer I saw it spin, the figure landed kicking Lee Sin in his head sending him flying, the figure then dashed towards Yi, he tried to defend himself with his sword, but the figure simply dodge the blade and pile-drive Yi into the ground, the other members of the parties cried as they saw their leaders knocked up, the figure rose from the ground, It was a girl, a young girl, with black hair and green eyes, she was wearing some kind of red armor with white patterns, the blades in the ground flew towards her and started hovering around her.

- THE FUCK ARE YOU IDIOTS DOING? - She roared - WHAT DO YOU MEAN WITH "CIVIL WAR" AND "BATHE THE CITY IN CRIMSON"? ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MINDS!

- Tch - Lee Sin snarled getting up - The rotten woman is here.

- What did you just called me?

- What you heard, stupid bitch! - Yi yelled jumping from the ground - FEAR NOT, MY FELLOW SUBJECTS, WE SHALL NOT FALLL...

- Your "fellow subjects" ditched you-Irelia said sharply.

- Ehm...Surrender?

- For fucks, sake - Irelia said sighing - I can't believe both of you are high-ranking figures within our city.

- Believe it or not, they are - A woman said.

- hello, miss Karma-Lee Sin said smiling - You look beautiful today.

Karma was older than Irelia, her skin was dark, her eyes were green, she was wearing a purple dress, behind her there was a floating emerald disc.

- You are blind, Lee, but thanks - Karma said giggling.

- Please, don't spoil these idiots, duchess - Irelia said bowing.

- Come on, Iri, we are friends, you don't have to be formal.

- I...I can't...I must respect our ranks-Irelia said looking at the ground embarrassed.

- Soraka was right, you are too young to act like an adult.

- Can you see that Mister Yi? - Lee sin whispered mischievously - Yuri at it's finest?

- I HEARD THAT, YOU IDIOT - Irelia roared.

- Now, now, let's calm down and... - Karma looked at us - Oh, my! Ahri! It's been a while!-Karma said running and hugging the fox.

- Hi! - Ahri answered cheerfully.

- you haven't been a bad girl, have you?

- I...- Ahri looked away shyly - I...I've been good!

- I hope so...and over here we have...Sarah Fortune! well, this is a surprise, I thought you hated the whole "peace business".

- I'm just delivering something - Sarah said bluntly giving Karma the letter - It's from Queen Ashe, in this letter she explains everything, she also asks for a favor involving a certain..."something".

- "A certain something?" - Karma repeated lifting a brow, she opened the letter and read it, at the end, she looked surprised - Oh! Well, this is certainly...particular, I'm not sure whether this will be possible, but since Ashe asked for it I'll see what I can do, will you stay, Sarah?

- Until my ship is ready, also, Nami will be staying here as well.

- Sure, now, Ahri, follow me, we will go to the Placidium and discuss this matter with the elders.

Ahri nodded and we followed Karma, Sarah went the other way, as we reached Yi, Lee, and Irelia, Lee whistled.

- Damn, how can you like boards when there are boobs like those?

- You don't understand, stupid monk! - Yi retorted - Flat chests are promises! PROMISES OF A BRILLIANT FUTURE FILLED WITH JUSTICE!

- YOU ARE THE IDIOT! BIG BREAST ARE FILLED WITH THE DREAMS AND HOPES OF MEN! I LIVE THIS LIFE FOR THE PLOT!

- BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP! - Irelia roared - For fuck's sake, Yi, I'm surprised Wu Kong hasn't snapped from your insanity.

- There were times, but I carried on.

Behind Irelia a...creature appeared, his entire body was covered in brown fur, his face was a monkey, he was wearing a red armor with golden patterns, in his right hand, he was carrying a peculiar staff.

- I'm sorry to hear that, Wu Kong - Irelia said patting his shoulder.

- meh, at least he is training me, It could have been worse, I could have ended as your discipline.

- WHAT DOES TH...

My patience reached its limit, I broke free from the crate, the Ionians looked at my form dumbfounded, with a quick move I caught the monkey with my limbs and suspended him in the air.

-IMPRESSIVE! AMUSING! HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE!? A HUMANOID MONKEY?! HOW STRANGE! I NEED TO KNOW MORE - I yelled examination Wu Kong.

- W...WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU? - He struggled in my grip - LEAVE ME ALONE YOU MONST...WHERE THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE TOUCHING?!

- Let's see, Stone skin? unbelievable! High spirit energy, peculiar! but... - I grabbed with one of my limbs something in the air, another Wu Kong appeared - A copy won't do, with this, I have the original, amusing! let's see what else I can discover...

Karma finally snapped and reached Ahri.

- Ahri, dear, can you stop...Sauron?!

- YOU CAN DO UNSPEAKABLE THING TO AND/OR ME! - She yelled stark naked leaping towards me.

- Stay away, Ahri, I'm studying this amazing subject...also It's Vel'Koz, not Sauron.

- Okay, Yi, Lee, help me with this - Karma commanded, nothing happened - Lee? Yi? - she said turning around.

Lee Sin and Yi were on the ground, a pool of blood beneath them, Yi wrote something before he passed out, it said "rotten bitch", besides them Irelia was on the ground, drawing furiously on a paper while she mumbles senseless things.

- Irelia? - Karma asked frightened - What are you doing?

Irelia rose from the paper, she was wearing some strange glasses and a headband that said: "BL 4 Life" she was smiling maniacally.

-OF COURSE! WHY DIDN'T THOUGHT ABOUT IT!?TENTACLESXMONKEY! IT WAS SO OBVIOUS! BEST PAIRING EVER! - She yelled admiring her job.

Karma looked at Irelia, then at the fallen Yi and Lee, then at me struggling with Ahri and Wu Kong, she sighed.

- how the hell am I supposed to explain this to the elders?