Chapter 56: A Blast from the Past - Part 2:
I'm Sonic! Sonic the Hedgehog!
I'll admit! We walked RIGHT INTO this one!
Ever since we accidentally boarded that rocket,
we were suddenly separated by a light of all
things, and then I was forced to battle those
old robots all by myself, followed by a sudden
drop into nothingness! While none of this makes
sense, my hunch that it'll lead us to Eggman is
pretty damn huge!
When Sonic came to, he found himself in a grassy clearing surrounded by a tropical forest. A few ruined temples were visible in the distance, along with some scattered water springs, a train station, a small wooden hut, and even Angel Island, hovering just meters above the nearby ocean, its Master Emerald shrine occupied, though the emerald itself was only partially there.
"Whoa. This place seems pretty familiar too. The forest, the lakes, the L-train, that hole in the cliff that somehow leads to the Ice Caps, and...wait! Isn't the Master Emerald not even on that island anymore?! And I thought Tails got rid of that workshop!" Sonic said, "Gee, all this stuff from the past! It kinda' reminds me of one of my more recent adventures, just without being forced to hit puberty again!"
After looking around for a bit, Sonic also noticed a gray, mechanical structure in the distance.
"And I'm willing to bet that that's where Eggman is! That guy loves technology like crack!" He said.
{A cutaway began, showing Sonic staring down Dr. Eggman, who was inside the cockpit of Metal Robotnik (the final boss of Sonic 2), preparing to fight. Before the two could exchange blows however, the theme music from Aquatic Ruin Zone started to play. With a sigh, Sonic sheepishly pulled out a smartphone, and tapped the call button. "Amy, what is it? I'm kinda' in the middle of something here!" He asked, starting to pace around, "Hmm? Why yes, I would like homemade ice cream after dinner tonight! ...Huh? Oh, what flavor? Hmm, I choose chili dog. What?! Oh, come onnnnnn! Ugh, fine! Rocky Road, I guess! But hold the almonds! They always get stuck in my teeth!" Meanwhile, Eggman was watching Sonic the whole time, saliva dribbling from his chin as he stared at the phone in Sonic's hand. "Alright, see you at home!" Sonic finished, hanging up, before noticing Eggman's facial expression. "Oh, you like this? Well, I don't blame you. I love it too! I can look up the best places to get chili dogs, manage my ring account, play Sonic Dash, the works!" He continued. Suddenly, Eggman jumped out of the mech and sat in a dog-like manner right in front of his adversary, shaking his rear around as if he had a tail. "Can I hold it for a bit? Pleeeeeeaaassse?!" Eggman begged. "Sorry, but I kinda' need this thing. Besides, you probably have more advanced technology than I could ever hope to get my hands on." Sonic replied. Eggman started whining like a puppy. "Grrrrrr! I don't care! I just want my own smartphone! Please give it to me! Please please please please please please! Ahwoooo!" The doctor continued, proceeding to run like a dog in circles around Sonic, before accidentally proceeding to chase an imaginary tail. "Here, Eggman! You want this?! You want the phone?! Huh?! You want it?! Who wants the phone?!" The hedgehog said at last. Eggman grew even more hyper, jumping around and panting like a dog as well. "Me! Me! I do! I do!" He chanted as he moved about. "Well then here! Fetch!" Sonic said, tossing his cellphone through one of the large, round windows of the Death Egg, breaking the glass. With a loud bark, the overweight doctor jumped through the window after it, not realizing that he was falling through space until it was too late. "OH, FUUUUCCCCCCKKKKKK!" He shouted. Having defeated the doctor again, Sonic proceeded to snicker like a dog.}
Without waiting a moment longer, Sonic sprinted out of the clearing and into the woods, passing by a sign that read 'Mystic Ruins' along the way. As he was dashing through the jungle however, Sonic heard the footsteps of someone else within the foliage, appearing to rival his own speed. He pulled to a stop for a bit and looked around. The footsteps had completely stopped.
"Weird..." Sonic uttered, before shrugging and taking off again.
Trouble began when he entered another grassy clearing, this one being right next to a pond. At a speed almost as fast as Sonic's, a red creature glided into the area from his right and after winding up a punch, thrust a large fist forward in an attempt to hit him. Sonic only managed to outrun him within the last split-second, and ground to a halt to look back at the being who had attacked him.
"Knuckles?" Sonic asked, cautiously stepping closer.
"That's my name, don't wear it out!" Knuckles replied.
"Seriously, what the hell are you doing here? I thought I told you and Tails to watch Junior!" Sonic continued.
"Pah! Who the fuck is this 'Junior' you speak of?" Knuckles asked, "I never pictured you of all people to be so full of shit!"
Knuckles proceeded to charge Sonic again (this time via spin-dash), with Sonic sidestepping out of the way, causing the red echidna to crash head-first into a tree.
"You know, my son? Looks like me, but with pink stripes and a lighter shade of blue? About to turn one hedgehog-year old?" Sonic asked, "N-never mind that! What are you doing here, and why'd you attack me?! Have you lost your mind?!"
"Don't be so naïve, Sonic! You know what you did! You stole the Chaos Emeralds, and I need them back this instant!" Knuckles replied, not showing any visible damage from his crash.
"And he thinks I'm full of shit!" Sonic muttered with a sigh, before speaking up again, "Alright, then. If you want them so badly, then why don't you try and take 'em from me?!"
"You're gonna be sorry you asked!" Knuckles replied, cracking his hands.
Sonic got into a fighting stance, watching as Knuckles jumped high into the air and initiated a downward punch towards him. He quickly jumped backwards and retaliated with a homing attack right on his head, knocking him to the grass, before ramming him again just as he landed. While he was spin-dashing in place right on Knuckles' stomach, Sonic was caught off guard as Knuckles knocked him off with a punch.
Just as he was getting back to his feet, he found himself being swung around in circles by his ankles, before being whacked on the ground repeatedly like a sledge hammer. Knuckles then forcefully curled Sonic into a ball, and dribbled him around like a basketball for a spell, before knocking him out of his own hand with a powerful kick. Sonic managed to land on his feet, and was prepared to block another punch from Knuckles, before punching him back in the face. He then used the brief time while he was stunned to run behind him and knock him across the clearing and into a tree yet again with a roundhouse kick.
"Oof!" Knuckles yelled during the impact, before slowly getting up and rubbing the newly-formed bump on his head, as blood trickled out of his nose and mouth.
"Well! Look who's the last one standing!" Sonic taunted, "Now if you'd be so kind as to explain what led you to believe all this nonsense..."
Suddenly, Knuckles charged forwards and knocked Sonic back a considerable distance with a punch. Sonic managed to backflip during the knockback and kicked off of a tree to maintain his mid-air momentum, before homing attacking his opponent back. However, the attack was blocked by both of Knuckles' fists, and after a brief struggle of the two trying to overcome each other, Knuckles reigned supreme and forced Sonic back. After landing on his stomach, and spitting some blades of grass from his mouth, Sonic was quick to notice that Knuckles was coming up behind him.
He quickly got back to his feet, and front-flipped over the charging echidna, counterattacking with a homing attack to the back, which only managed to make him stumble. Upon regaining his footing, Knuckles quickly raised his fists skyward.
"Activate 'Shovel Claw'!" He yelled, causing the spikes on his gloves to turn silver.
He dug into the ground, barely dodging a dropkick that Sonic had attempted to hit him with. In a fighting stance, Sonic proceeded to look around cautiously for signs of where he might pop up, but Knuckles had tunneled too deep down to notice anything. Suddenly, he popped right back up from the ground with his fist in the air, punching Sonic right in the stomach.
"A-hoof!" Sonic groaned as he was hit, before landing on his stomach yet again.
Behind him, Knuckles approached and got into a fighting stance, with Sonic quickly balancing on his hands and holding his legs out behind him, like a donkey getting ready to kick. Immediately, Knuckles started throwing a rapid series of punches which Sonic blocked with a rapid series of kicks. Neither of the two seemed to be struggling to overcome the other, at least until Knuckles resorted to grabs instead of punches. He managed to grab Sonic's feet again, and spun him around for a bit before tossing him upwards. He then quickly climbed up a nearby tree and jumped off its trunk to reach him.
"Activate 'Fighting Gloves'!" Knuckles ordered, his gloves turning yellow almost immediately upon command.
He then landed a series of quick yet powerful punches to Sonic's face and torso, before bringing his fists together and dealing a strong downward blow with both fists that knocked him back down to the ground. Sonic was unconscious by the time he landed, and was only awakened by the suddenness of Knuckles landing on top of his stomach from the high height, before backflipping off of him and getting into a fighting stance. Groaning in pain, Sonic weakly got to his knees, his head rocking dizzily due to having had the wind knocked out of him. A few cuts were present on his face and body from Knuckles' pointed spikes hitting him so hard. He proceeded to start uncontrollably coughing up blood, panting occasionally.
Inside the lair of an unidentified location, Dr. Eggman and Dr. Eggman Nega were sitting in chairs and eyeing the screen, taking a break from their sexual harassment as they watched Sonic and Knuckles fight. The screen's camera zoomed in on the nearly-downed Sonic, much to the delight of the two doctors (and to their robotic minions, who were quietly snickering in the corners of the room while guarding the doors at each end) and to the shock and disgust of the girls.
"Ugh, gross!" Rouge said, looking away as best she could with the metal bands holding her in the armchair.
"He has to persevere! He's just got to!" Blaze said.
"Sonic! No!" Amy whined, "You've got to get up! You can do it, Sonic!"
"Hah! Told ya'!" Eggman gloated, pressing a button on the control panel which caused two large cartons of caramel corn to emerge from some round slots, "Now to watch as my interactive hologram finishes off your last glimmer of hope! Ahahahahaaaaa!"
"You mean 'ours'?!" Eggman Nega added, only to receive a pimp-slap to the face.
Back in Mystic Ruins, Knuckles slowly started to approach Sonic.
"You seem to be holding onto your last moments of life pretty hard! I just know you won't give up those Chaos Emeralds easily, even after a beating! So I might as well just kill you now so I can pry them from your corpse like mushrooms off of a pizza! But don't worry, because I'm gonna make it quick, and painless." Knuckles taunted.
"For the last time, Knuckles!" Sonic said, finally through spitting blood, but still panting, "You're so...full...of shit!"
"HAH!" Knuckles replied, "Is that so? Well, maybe you can come back and debate that with me after you become a ghost! Face it! You've lost!"
"Ohhh, I'm not done yet..." Sonic managed to say, getting back to his feet.
Knuckles rolled his eyes.
"Fine, then. But just see if you can really defeat me! Here, I'll even leave myself open for ya'! Go on!" He said, his hands placed gently on his hips.
After panting for another split second, Sonic proceeded to charge up a Super Peel-Out, running in place at a speed upwards of Mach-1, his arms extended behind him, and his legs moving so fast that it looked like a red figure-8 was below his torso.
"Oh, cool! You're taunting me!" Knuckles said, "I'm not sure how that'll work, but I'll let you try it out for the hell of it!"
Suddenly, Sonic dashed into the woods at high speed, creating a gust of wind and causing some of the grass in the clearing to fly up and into Knuckles' face.
"Pfft! How pathetic! You really (pfft) think you can just flee (pfft) like that?!" The red echidna said, spitting grass out of his mouth.
Suddenly, Sonic zoomed through the clearing again, ramming through Knuckles again and creating another stripe on the grass. Before Knuckles could talk, however, Sonic repeated the same tactic multiple times, the last of which ending with him running around Knuckles several times to make him dizzy and cause several stars to circle around his head. By the time he had stopped in front of his stunned foe, Sonic had made the grass within the clearing resemble the fairway at a golf course. He then proceeded to deliver a powerful kick to Knuckles right in his groin, which knocked him into a tree, caused the stars around his head to shatter like glass, and gave him excruciating pain. He let out a blood-curdling scream, which echoed across the Mystic Ruins, sending flickies flying out of the trees.
"AAAAAAAGGGGHHH! LOW-BLOW! LOW-BLOW! GOD DAMN IT!" He moaned, holding his crotch and wincing in pain, "Oomph! Fuck this motherfucking son-of-a-bitch in the asshole for kicking my goddamn dick with his bullshit shoes! Augh!"
It turned out that the tree that Knuckles had been knocked into was a durian tree, which was shaken from the impact. With an audible thump, one of its fruits fell right on top of his head.
"YOW!" He screamed again, grabbing his head, before a second durian fell onto his already bruised crotch.
"AA-HOWCH! AUGH! SONIC YOU BLUE BITCH!" He moaned again, log-rolling a short distance away from the tree.
Sonic sighed.
"Way to go, Knucklehead!" He said, stepping back.
"Huh?!" Knuckles asked, unable to stand due to how much pain he was in, "Oh shit!"
Sonic was busying himself by curling into a ball and charging up a spin-dash, before he let loose and knocked Knuckles upwards at a diagonal trajectory, still spinning in place on his stomach as he pushed him through the air. He then jumped off and landed back on the ground, watching as Knuckles continued to fly away due to still having a lot of mid-air momentum.
He crashed into the top of the same tree he had just been knocked into, and then the tops of many more trees, until he crashed into a cliff in the distance and fell onto his stomach. At the end of the forest, Knuckles weakly lifted his battered and bloody head, only to drop it back down as countless durians from the last tree he hit fell on top of him, followed by all of the trees he had hit, which fell on top of him like dominoes. All of this caused a tremor which led to a rockslide, and soon a pile of boulders from the cliff fell onto him too. Sonic winced as Knuckles let out one last blood-curdling scream before disappearing beneath the elements. He then looked down disdainfully, realizing what he had done.
"I can't believe it," He said, "I-I killed Knuckles."
Back in the lair, both doctors were pounding the control panel, furious at how Sonic had triumphed over them again.
"Yeah! Way to go, Sonic!" Rouge and Blaze said in unison.
"Sonic! Don't listen to them! That was just a hologram!" Amy said desperately.
"Rrgh!" Eggman Nega groaned, "Well we still have a few more tricks up our sleeve, right bud?"
Eggman nodded.
Without hesitation, Nega pressed another button on the panel, its purpose unknown.
Back in the ruins, Sonic still felt guilty over what he had just done.
"Well, I guess I'd better find the others and stop those eggheads." He said, walking sulkily into the woods, before noticing that he had passed a sign. The sign read 'Step Into This Pond And You Shall Be Healed'. Sonic shrugged and stepped into it, feeling its effects immediately. The cuts, scratches, and bruises he had suffered all disappeared.
"Well that's a relief!" He said, before noticing the blood he had coughed onto the grass flying right towards him and into his mouth, which he forcefully gulped down, "Ugh, though I don't think I quite needed that, but alright."
"GRRR!" Eggman growled, "I thought I told you to turn off the healing properties of the Mystic Ruins' water!"
"Oops, wrong button! Heh!" Nega replied sheepishly.