EPISODE 11: ROBOTNIK ENGAGES IN MORE RANDOM STUPIDITY

Listening Music: Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog- Robotnik's Theme

watch?v=aO_z2nO3ByM

"COCONUTS!"

Robotnik burst through the door, smashing it to smithereenies! Coconuts rolled his eyes in annoyance. "Yes, Your Malodorousness?"

"SET THE TELEPORTER FOR THESE COORDINATES-"

The scouter fell off of Robotnik's face and desintegrated into a million tiny pieces.

Coconuts quickly snuck away and hid behind the desk.

"WHHHHHAHHHHAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTT!?"

Robotnik yelled so loudly it caused the windows to shatter.

"NOW HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO CONQUER THE WORLD IF I DON'T KNOW WHO TO CONQUER-"

"Your Awfulness, there's someone at the door!" Coconuts meekly stuttered.

"Hello, Ivo!" The front door of Robotnik's fortress opened, and Dr. Wily walked in, a shit-eating grin plastered across his face.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU WERE BEHIND THE SCOUTER?!"
Robotnik screamed while Wily rolled on the floor laughing up a storm.

"I-I couldn't resist! I knew you'd fall for it and probably go do something stupid, and that'd be HILARIOUS!" Wily continued laughing.
"I COULD'VE GOTTEN MYSELF KILLED A HUNDRED TIMES OVER-" "But you didn't, and you conquered Dream Land for yourself, and that's all that matters, right?"

Robotnik thought for a moment.

"I knew if you had the right motivation, you could do anything you wanted, so I gave it to you, and boom! You've conquered an entire nation in an afternoon! I'm so proud of you, Ivo!"

Wily said all this with a vaguely mocking tone to his voice.

"Don't stop here! The whole world can be your oyster!" Wily slapped Robotnik on the back. "Just let me join in and have a little fun, all right? It gets boring having to come up with stupid themed robots every year! OH! Speaking of which-"

Wily dug around in his pocket and pulled out a brochure!

It said "COME SEE DOCTOR WILY'S MAGNIFICENT MERMAIDS! STARRING THE SLICK METAL BEAUTY HERSELF, SPLASH WOMAN!"

The picture is of a large well-proportioned mermaid robot with a seductive look on her face in a pool lit by rainbow disco balls with lots of geysers positioned around it.

Robotnik looked at Wily and raised his eyebrow. "SPENDING TOO MUCH TIME IN JAPAN AGAIN, WILY?"

Wily sweated slightly. "Maybe."

Listening Music: Mega Man 9- Splash Woman's Theme

watch?v=l7qcJwJfyyk

An hour later, both of them were at the front row of Wily Stadium in the back of Wily Castle, with a large decorative skull covering the entrance. Very flashy.

There was a large pool with several geysers inside it, lots of lights, and speakers all around it! The legions of fans were yelling their lungs out in anticipation of the magnificent show!

"WILY, WHERE DID YOU COME UP WITH THIS?" Robotnik questioned.

"Oh, Ivo! I came up with this the same way I come up with all my robots- I got ridiculously high and picked a random word out of the dictionary!"

Robotnik laughed hard in response. "OH, SO THAT'S WHY SHEEP MAN AND CLOWN MAN EXIST! HAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"Attention, everyone! The show is about to start, so please stay in your seats! And if you're in the SPLASH zone, make sure to put all your electronics away!"

(GEDDIT ITS A TERRIBLE PUN GO AHEAD AND THROW YOUR TOMATOES AT THE COMPUPER SCREEN I'LL WAIT)

The lights in the stadium dimmed, and soft easy listening music started wafting through the stadium.

Splash Woman rose out from a compartment in the center of the stadium, with six other mermaid robots surrounding her! They were each a different color of the rainbow, creating a striking visual arrangement.

"Helloooooo, everyone! Are you all excited?!"

The crowd roared in approval!

"I CAN'T HEAAAAAARR YOU!"

The crowd roared louder!

One guy in the crowd threw his popcorn in the air and yelled "MARRY ME, SPLASH WOMAN!"

Listening Music: Mega Man X7: Soul Asylum

watch?v=YUdOd3xICc4

"All riight! Now, I've got a great show lined up for all my lovely fans in attendance today, so let's start-"

A slight spark was visible on the side of Splash Woman's head.

"The songs- I mean- what was I-"
The sparks continued, getting more and more visible. Splash Woman's speech was getting more and more stilted, and she was visibly twitching.

"Wily? Is this supposed to be happening?" Robotnik nudged Wily with a worried look on his face. Wily shook his head sideways.

Splash Woman's eyes turned purple, and she began to rise up into the air.
"Sorry about that, fans! Now, back to where I left off-"

A large trident appeared in her hand and she whirled it around with a flourish.

Listening Music: Mega Man X5: Vs. Maverick

watch?v=ZXCqjB_Zn1o

"DESTROYING YOU ALL!"

With a wave of her hand, she caused a massive tsunami to appear and smash one of the stadium walls, causing a massive damage to Wily's castle and insurance plan!

"NOOO! I THOUGHT I HAD WORKED OUT ALL THE BUGS!" Wily yelled in annoyance.

Robotnik leapt towards Splash Woman to deal with her, but Wily grabbed the back of his collar.
"WILY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! I HAVE TO-"
"I'm not stopping you, Ivo!" Wily pressed a button on his personal chair, and it began to levitate into the air and grow several weapons of various types all over it, with a large force field around it for good measure!

"You can't have all the battles to yourself, you know!" Wily laughed.

The two charged towards the rogue robotic pop star, weapons in hand!

"Ha ha ha! Well, now, it looks like you two are awfully persistent!" Splash Woman aimed her trident at the duo! "SORRY, BUT I DON'T GIVE AUTOGRAPHS!"

WILL ROBOTNIK AND WILY NOT TRIP OVER EACH OTHER IN THE FIGHT?

DID ROBOTNIK EVER GET A NEW RAY GUN?

WHAT IS THE MEANING OF SPLASH WOMAN'S PURPLE EYES?

FIND OUT ON THE NEXT EPISODE OF ROBOTNIK'S GRAND DOMINATION, "ROBOTNIK BECOMES THE ENVY OF BASEMENT DWELLERS EVERYWHERE!"