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Tatanka. Yes. The Alexandria Genesis is so complicated and unusually perfect, so I decided that I will add something and I also crossed out the overly perfect characteristics. Like her Grandmother had that genetic mutation, and possibly because of that, she died early. (See Chapter 3) and she's only 2 years old so she can't still conclude if all the symptoms of the mutation will apply to her (like never aging, being forever fit and healthy and etc.)
I'm not going to make her into a mary-sue character. (Because I think I will have a problem in there. I think it's hard to make a story with an overly OP character.) Her grandmother is also an acquaintance of the Queen. And also, the Phalanx Family is one of the most powerful families that made and signed the treaty, it will be discussed in the future chapters) and lastly, thank you for reviewing, I hope you're not disappointed.
Guest. Thank you for your review. You don't know how that comment affected me. I'M SO GLAD DAMN IT.
allylovesbluefood. Hey! Thank you for reviewing! I'm very happy because of your review. And we also share the same interests.
"We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light."
-Plato
Chapter 4
"Now, where the fuck am I?"
I studied the place around me. I got pretty lost when I tried to, uh, what is that term again? Right, I got pretty lost when I tried to tour the place. There is an abundance of trees from where I am now. The sunlight passes through the leaves of the trees.
The rustle of the leaves is more violent than usual. It's like a storm is coming. A violent and raging storm that can destroy even the finest house and the best castles. Now I wonder what this catastrophe will be like.
I remembered why I went here in the first place.
"Papa? Where are you going?" I heard my mother ask grandpa as she followed him while passing the silent hallways in front of the library.
There was a shuffle, then Grandpa replied, "I'm going to negotiate with the Pesca Family, they've become a thorn in our backs since we started gathering lower famiglias."
His phrase is what interrupted me from reading the "The Social Animal" by Elliot Aronson. I was really interested at the book, the problem was what Grandpa said.
I was buried under a deep thought; Pesca? Haven't I heard it before?
Somewhere at the back of my mind, a voice is screaming. Yes, you fucking have!
I tried to ignore the shouting voice, because obviously having a voice inside my head is not a Good Thing. But it continued shouting and screaming until my head feels like it s splitting into two.
You do! You do! You do! YOU DO!
The screams continued.
I winced in pain. I tried to go back and read, but even if my vision is clear, my vision keeps moving. Or at least that s what I thought until I tried to hold onto something stable.
I'm shaking. And it hurts.
The tears are trying to get out of my eyes and it's causing hell. Of course it hurts. It hurts more than the occasional cramps I get when I was 16. It hurts more than being stabbed by a pencil when I was 10, it hurts more than the injection they gave me after the led literally stuck under my skin.
But nothing hurts more than seeing your father get killed before you.
Wait.
What?
I froze. I remember it now. Everything.
The night my father died. My real father, the one from my original world.
I was five and it was my birthday, my father was beside me, driving, while I'm sitting on the shotgun seat. It was night time, and no other cars are passing by. We parked at the edge of the rode to appreciate the stars.
"You can tell the stars all your worries my dear, they will hear you."
I stared at his eyes. It's twinkling.
"Your eyes are like the stars daddy, does that mean I can tell you all my worries too?"
He laughed. "Of course," he happily replied.
Then it happened.
Apparently, father and I, we forgot to lock the doors. A man entered our car casually, as if he's the one who owns the car. We both stared at the guy who entered without permission. My father confronted him.
"Go out Minerva!" He screamed.
I'm confused but I managed to get out somehow.
I saw dad through the wind shield as he prevented the man to make it near me. He drove the car into the tree. At full speed, making it crash at the trunk of the tree harder than it should be.
I went to the car to see daddy.
Then his face full of blood was what surprised me.
At this point of my reminiscing, I wondered why wasn't I crying. Then, I remembered. At that time, I didn't know what death was. I was so young, so innocent. Pampered with riches the others can't buy. Loved by both of my parents so much, with my friends who wants to play with me night and day. My life was perfect.
I thought it was all okay. I thought they are just acting. I believed in Santa, in tooth fairies, in all the fictional bullshits. Simple happiness like seeing gift under the Christmas tree in Christmas, seeing a paper bill under my pillow after hiding my newly removed teeth.
I know people can die, but I thought you'll meet your death in a wide spread flower field.
Until I saw the car exploded before me. Some pieces of metal was blown my way but the only thought that's in mind is my father inside.
Then, the next thing I knew, I was at the hospital. Many people approached me, saying their condolences. However, none of them told me the truth. People lied to me. They said father died in a car crash, yes he did.
Because he saved me. That's why he died.
And then, it was already father's funeral. (Too fast, too fast, why is it so fast!?)
As father's coffin slowly descend in his already prepared grave, I realized how loud the people's voiced was. Their sobs.
But my mother only cried once, only after she saw the father's unidentifiable body. She sobbed until she succumbed to nothingness. She cried and cried and cried and cried.
There was no goodbyes. No farewells. Just that eerie silence as my mother cry. After moments, people started to enter. I began to notice the crowd staring from our windows, looking with us with pity.
I did not cry, because I was still at the state of disbelief and denial, even though I didn't know it myself. I just looked at the people grieving. It was blank, I don't know what I should feel, and Ella, my best friend at that time were there too. We- what did we do? I- I can't remember. I can't believe I've forgotten! She's my first best friend! Or is she? Isn't Allison my first and only friend?
I'm confused. Really, really confused.
I remember playing in the meadows in our town house, my father used to- what did he used to do? He- what?
Blank.
I tried to remember.
Then the splitting pain came back. I did not even realized it was gone. I gripped the bookshelf beside me. I tried to move, but I end up stumbling, then falling. My hands on my head as I whispered cries of pain. My body curled up against the wooden floor.
It fucking hurts. I want to end up dead. But no one should hear me here. I just know that no one should. Or I get to face more bull crap after.
I struggled to stand up, with the book falling from my left hand which causing me to trip with a loud thump and maybe a broken nose. I reached to where my Grandpa and Mother was talking. My hands were still on my head. The pain is getting more and worse.
The hardest part is trying not to bang my head against the nearest wall. I prefer the outside pain than internal. And I currently want to commit suicide just to fucking end the pain.
"What is it princess?" he asked. Examining me, he lifted me to get a closer look with my face.
I slightly panicked, aware that the pain I feel is so obvious because of my facial expression. They will ask questions. They will be worried. I can make my face neutral, but it will only take seconds. The pain I feel is like migraine, fucking migraine in fucking steroids.
I can take it for ten seconds. Ten seconds.
Inhale. Exhale. Let's start the countdown shall we?
Ten.
I lift my face looking at him. "I want to come with you," I told him. My right eye twitching.
Nine.
Maybe the pain will subside if I try to know what caused the headache. The headache was caused by the person screaming in my head. And the screaming started when the 'Pesca Famiglia' was mentioned, and- when I tried to remember something.
Eight.
"You're not coming princess, it's too dangerous," he sternly answered.
Seven.
I winced again. The digging pain in my head is still causing problems. Goddammit. Even the cursing is not helping. I thought it would.
"But Grandpa, please?" I performed my greatest technique. Puppy eyes with fake tears. Only now it's not fake, it's so fucking real I want to wail.
Six.
"Papa, you don't have to bring her if you don t want to," my mother interrupted. I stopped at the sudden urge to scream at her. The pain is really pushing me to do naive things that I will regret later.
Five.
My grandpa sighed. "Okay, I'll bring you. Just don't act like a brat, are you okay with that?"
"Yes Grandpa," I fakely beamed at him.
Four.
He slowly brought me down.
Three.
I ran. I ran as fast as I can outside. Ignoring my mother who is calling my name, and probably the weird looks Grandpa must be giving me.
Two.
"Hurts, hurts, fucking hurts" I whispered as I finally got outside.
One.
Stop. Stop you head ache, I said to myself.
Zero.
"GODDAMMIT!"
I automatically flinched as I remembered what happened hours ago. Now that I'm thinking about that, what the bloody hell is happening to me? I certainly did forgot the times when that little voice will whisper something. It's either an answer or a question. I did not mind having a roommate in my head, because it's helping me in some ways.
Until now.
This is the first time it tried to break my skull. I doubt it is a hyper intuition, because it doesn't flare up in times of danger. It just answers questions, questions I already knew but I declared non-existent.
Sooner or later I think I'll regret not dwelling with this shit.
"It's already 10 am and- I'm like here for two hours!" I exclaimed while tapping my foot against the rustling leaves.
The hell I'm going to stay here for another hour, I thought.
Thank heavens the headache was long gone now, once grandpa and I entered the Pesca Famiglia premises, the pain in my head started to subside. Or else I might scream in here like an idiot.
"What's with the Pesca Family Forest? It's surprisingly huge," I grumbled, starting to start the 'tour' again.
After a few minutes, I found myself in a highway. The fuck I'm going to do in here?! I knew I shouldn't have started that shitty little tour again.
"Kon'nichiwa! Watashi wa-" a wild voice suddenly appeared! Then there was a blabber. "-Marumaya yo!" (1)
I glance at my left, it is where the energetic voice appeared. I stared at her for a moment, then replied, "Me-" I pointed at myself. "Don't speak Japanese," I said as I make unreadable hand signs. Then I sighed, speaking Italian with a Japanese? I'm damn sure it will not end well.
"English?" she asked.
"Yes," I answered in English. She smiled brightly and nodded many times.
Speaking Italian surely makes you think you're speaking English all over again. The only thing I want to learn right now is Japanese. Ah, and French. But definitely not German.
She smiled at me brightly, she held up eight fingers and pointed at herself. I stared at her blankly for a second. Then I snapped my fingers in the air. Ah, she's already eight? I'm like, two years old. And she's befriending me? Isn't she wondering why I know English?
Maybe that's because I look like an American?
Or maybe I met a dense one?
She suddenly frowned. Which was quite a shock. She's smiling seconds ago, isn't she? Or maybe she was disappointed I haven't introduced myself yet? Or she's just moody?
I pointed at myself. "I'm Minerva," I introduced. Maybe telling my name will lighten up things a bit.
(2) Porca troia, I inwardly sweared.
She continued to frown then shook her head. "目には何か問題目の?" (3) She told me.
I gave her a confused look. We. Do. Not. Even. Understand. Each. Other. In. The. SLIGHTEST. GODDAMMIT.
"I told you I don't understand Japanese," I mirrored her frown.
What's her problem anyway? I don't understand her, yet she's talking to me as if I understand Japanese.
"目を見る悲しい-" she shook her head again and tried to smile. "-用事." (4)
I gave her a questioning look and returned her smile. She just waved her hand and bowed. She's saying that she's going to go, isn't she?
I nodded and waved back. I stared at her back as she walked away from me.
What is she doing in a highway anyway?
What am I doing in here anyway?
"Merda," I silently cursed. I'm lost, how can I forget that? (5)
I continued my tiring adventure in the forest that seemed endless. In anime, it only took them seconds to cross this kind of places. I'm starting to doubt if I'm in anime or what.
So far, I have only seen three characters. Reborn, Luce and Timoteo. Who knows if meeting them is just coincidence? What if it just happened that they have the same names as the characters in Katekyo Hitman Reborn?
Idiot to the core, it's too accurate to be a coincidence, the voice at the back of my head interrupted.
I stopped in my tracks. Who the hell are you anyway? I asked inside my head.
There was a pause, I am you.
Me? You are me? Don t kid me, that s bullshit, I replied. Who the fuck kills their alter ego?
My mind whirled and I struggled at the thousands of possibilities. What is in my head?
I am you. And you will always be me. You may not understand this now, but you will soon, it said. I am whoever he or she is. Is it possible if-
What the hell do you mean? I asked.
There was no answer. It's like the voice in my head seemed to not exist in the first place. I'm like an idiot in the huge forest staring in space. When I glanced up in the sky, the fading streaks of the orange sky is now slowly disappearing. It s getting darker and darker by the time I started to move my feet again. I can t just stay in one place, right?
I continued to walk until my feet are sore. I've walked a long way bloody hell, how huge is this forest anyway?!
"Where's the bag Wilst?"
"Sen, Wilst is sleeping, and he's using the bag as a pillow."
"X, get the bag."
"No way in hell. You know he s like a monster if you disturbed his sleep!"
"X, listen. Get. The. Fucking. Bag."
"Goddammit Sen. You- I wa- Damn you. Okay! Okay! I ll get it! Just don t point that goddamn gun at me!"
I heard voices nearby. I followed from where the voices came from out of curiosity. And maybe with hope that they can get me out of here. Bloody hope.
Then a group of three was what I saw after I struggled getting to where the voices came from. A guy standing coolly with a mask on his face. The other guy is walking to another guy who is now curled up beside a gigantic tree with a bag, which he used as a pillow. The funny thing is, they are all wearing mask. I can t see the details of the mask because the darkness stops me from doing it.
The head of the guy who is standing coolly snapped his head on the place I am standing. I froze in shock, cause hell, I;m like fifty meters away from them but I really doubt he ll see me. Or even if he did (which is really impossible, it s too dark, not to mention I m too far) he can t catch me. He s not that
"Why is a child in here?" A voice behind me came out of nowhere.
I slowly turned to see a man wearing a mask behind me. Wait he s fifty meters away from me, isn't he? I glance at the place to check the place I was secretly looking, there are now only two guys, both standing and staring at me.
What?
"I m bringing you," said the man as I glance back up at him. He scooped me up by the collar of the dress I m wearing. The white dress was now in shreds and dirtier than it ever been. I rolled my eyes, goddammit. I'm really fucked up if mother saw that I ruined my dress. And what these men here's doing, this is kidnapping right?
"What will we do with her Sen?" The other man asked after we arrived in front of them.
The man beside him glance at him, then at me. "We are not bringing her, am I right?"
The man who is holding me, that I noticed they called Sen, spoke, "We will. She saw us doing our mission."
Bloody shit. I did not see them doing their mission. I just saw them and heard them talking! What did I do wrong?!
"Can I ask something? I spoke. You re not killing me, right? You are all very very good people right? You are going to free me right? Right?"
They just stared at me then started to walk. Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. I shouldn't have made that stupid tour! Now I m lost in the middle of a forest and abducted by three men wearing masks.
"What is your name?" the Sen guy asked.
"My name? Why would you want to know it? You're going to kill me anyway right?" I somehow said bravely knowing how dire the situation I am in. Somehow adrenaline is rushing through my veins.
Sen deadpanned. "If you're continuing that attitude, maybe your family will find you in a sack, with your innards scattered all over you," he said.
"Gross," I replied. "I'm Minerva Phalanx."
"Hey! Don't drop me!" I scratched my butt. They stopped walking, then took their time to stare at me. I returned their gaze. I studied them, their ages must be ranging from 20 years to 25 years old. But I can never be sure with them wearing their masks.
Sen quickly grabbed me and carried me like a potato sack. Then started running. "Why are you in the middle of the forest?" he said as the other followed him. I hear no sound as they made their way out of the forest.
"Yeah why?" the guy near us repeated. He have the same shade of hair as me. But much more dimmer, and he curses too much.
"I'm getting sleepy X, please carry m-" The third guy who is in front of the guy he called X (which is the same guy who repeated Sen s question) fainted, then the guy who he called X quickly caught him. I stared at him, he do not even stopped running as he caught the sleepy guy.
"Damn it Wilst. You re getting sleepy in the middle of this shit?" X said as he continued to swear.
Merida, I cursed in my head. Why are they even running?
It is because of the obvious reason, they are kidnapping you, the voice in my head replied.
I rolled my eyes, Now that was good of you to answer my bloody question.
Silence.
"Yo Sen! Yo X! And yo! Hic! Uh, sleepy Wilst! Why are y all- Hick! -stressed out?" A man who wears a mask (goddammit what s with the masks) welcomed us.
"Shut up Uoi. We are fucking problematic right now, and don't let me start with how drunk you are right now. JUST GET RID OF THAT BOTTLED SHIT IN YOUR ROOM! THE HQ SMELLS SHIT RIGHT NOW!" X screamed.
"Going to sleep," Wilst said as he retreated to who-knows-where.
Guys, it s JWUF . Just woke up fuckers. As we entered a van after a long run, Sen did something that put me into a fucking deep sleep. When I woke up, we are in front of a bungalow type house, and Wilst was already up. The house was surprisingly well lit. And we were literally in the middle of nowhere, or at least that was what I thought.
Sen dropped me into the nearest sofa then walked out of the house s living room. Leaving me with X and what X called drunk man .
"Hey Uoi, have you seen my-" a woman appeared in the living room. She have a short black hair, only reaching her jaw. She's also wearing a mask, or you can consider it as one. It is because she's using a net to cover her whole face, a fine net. So although I can see her face, I can't see it at the same time. She stared at me for almost a minute then said, "Who is that baby?"
I lift both my little legs to lay them on the sofa. I studied the whole place, it's surprisingly clean for an HQ of kidnappers. There are even scented candles scattered all over the place. Then I glanced up only to see a clock, it is 7 pm. Hell, I'm really fucked up aren't I?
The man called Uoi replied, "Hic! She s Hic! Sen brought her Hic!"
"Okay," she finally said after she thoroughly examined me, her facial expression seemed, bored. "Anyway, have you seen my toothbrush?"
Uoi seemed to think for a moment, then said, "Nope."
"I'll go ask Tri," she said, boredom still evident in her voice.
"Who is she?" I asked out of curiosity. My hands playing with the yarns placed in the living room's center table. I noticed that they had hired some great designer to decorate this place, because it's just- beautiful.
"She's Ves," he replied as he sat beside me in the sofa and tried to sleep in the only available space, while he crammed himself in the process.
Then there was loud screaming.
"THE HELL TRI! YOU THOUGHT MY TOOTH BRUSH WAS TRASH SO YOU DECIDED TO-"
"I decided to throw it, yes."
"YOU DECIDED TO THROW IT?! FUCKING HELL! I'VE ONLY BOUGHT IT LAST WEEK IN JAPAN! AND NOW YOU'VE THROWN IT?!"
"A black tooth brush is not suited for a lady, Ves."
"FUCK YOU AND YOUR BELIEFS!"
I heard something crash and a door being slammed shut, loudly.
What's going in this place anyway? Why are my hands not tied? I thought they've kidnapped me?
"Uoi, can you assis-" a man wearing a formal attire entered the living room. His hair is in a deepest shade of red, he is also wearing a mask only covering half of his face.
'What are you doing here?" he asked incredulously.
I shrugged and continued staring at him. His long hair was gel-ed into place. He moves so gracefully and speaks gracefully. Like when god showered manners, he is the only one who was wide awake.
"We're keeping her to build transactions to the Phalanx Family," Sen entered the scene, still wearing a mask.
The graceful man nodded in response. "And what is her connection to the Phalanx Family?"
"She is the only grandchild of the Phalanx Boss, Tri."
The man who Sen called Tri seemed to understand, then exited the living room so gracefully.
"What are you doing with me?" I asked.
My hands still occupied with the yarn. I yawned in the process, I'm getting really sleepy now. I don't know why but I'm feeling pretty comfortable right now. Maybe that's because this house feels like home.
"We re using you to have transactions in your family."
"Thank god Reborn, I was getting insane in there," I whined as we left the house in the middle of the forest. Yesterday sucks. My head almost split into two, I got lost in the woods, I got kidnapped by weird guys wearing masks.
Reborn glared at me. "Be happy that they did not do anything to you," he deadpanned.
I rolled my eyes, "Why would they?" I asked. Though I know how dangerous they can be.
While in the warehouse, I heard a bunch of swearing and saw a lot of fighting. And although I saw Reborn and Lisse fight before, I was still dumbstruck-ed to see them fight.
Ves and Tri had an argument, about the toothbrush and Tri's past sins. Ves really dug out all his past crimes (like bombing the restroom, gunning down the wrong man, burning documents, etc.). Tri got pissed and attacked Ves. When I saw them, that is the first time I thought fighting can be beautiful. They are like dancing.
I thought the others would stop them, they did not. Wilst slept in the corner, Uoi was drunk again, X is struggling about something and Sen paid no attention.
"Do you remember when I told you that there are two clashing groups in the black market?"
"I remember clearly," I replied.
"What are the groups?" he asked.
"The Cervello and you did not tell me the name of the other one," I told him.
He stared at the path before us. He carried me in his arms, I am hugging his neck and staring at the bright sun rays that passed through the trees branches and leaves. There was silence.
Reborn waited for a moment then said, "They have no name. They never had. People called them Incognito, but that is not official. That group is also too intelligent, strong, not to mention their temperament is too low. Not all of them of course."
I nodded, though I know that he cannot see it even if I stick out my tongue. I placed my forehead on his shoulder, then I said, "Let me guess, the group you're talking about is the group that kidnapped me."
"I thought you are an idiot," he praised me, or at the least, he tried to. Either way, it came out as an insult. "Do you know how Lisse screamed at the mansion? Your Grandpa was speechless as he watched his daughter destroy the furniture," he continued.
I laughed at what he said. "So I m going to be dead later right?"
He smirked as he continued his way out of the woods.
The group that kidnapped me brought me to the abandoned warehouse first thing in the morning. Then they placed me to sleep while traveling, the first thing I heard was the loud mouth of X. His mouth screaming a whole list of curses, the half of the swear words he screamed was not in my vocabulary, until now.
"He's going to stay with you until he escorted you back in the mansion," Reborn said as I he glanced at the man inside the black car.
I stared at him confused. "Where are you going?" I asked. After going out of the forest, Reborn walked straight beside this black car parked beside the highway.
"The man who was paying us to do missions sent us another letter," he said.
"Another mission?" I asked. "And possibly the last one?"
Then it strucked me. In the manga, Reborn said in the manga and anime that before they were turned into Arcobalenos, someone requested the seven of them to do exciting and challenging missions. On the last mission, they were turned into babies. Marking them in the history as the Seven Strongest Babies.
I stopped the urge of telling him what could possibly happen if he continued to go. Instead, I chant a mantra in my mind, I cannot ruin the future, I cannot ruin the future, I cannot ruin the future.
Its been two years and a couple of months since I woke up in this world. Somehow or someday, I'm damn sure I'm gonna ruin something. Something I will surely regret.
"That's what I presume," he said as he entered the other car parked behind the vehicle I will enter.
"Milady, let's go." I turned to see a familiar man standing beside me. I nodded and entered the car.
The journey to our mansion was silent. Neither I nor the man driving spoke to each other. It is given that this is the first time we really got a meter close to each other. If this was a normal day, I would try to talk to him to entertain myself. But in this fucking moment, the headache chose to bother my life right now.
The pain I'm feeling right now is not like before. It's mild, like someone is occasionally throwing me rocks aimed directly at my head. Not like before where I thought someone was chopping my head into half.
I stared at the road for a long time then fell into a deep sleep.
"M'lady, m'lady wake up. Wake up," a voiced said. It woke me up because it seemed like it is in a rush.
I slowly opened my eyes. The first thing I saw is a man who drove me to the mansion. "Are we there yet?" I groggily asked.
The man panicked and said, "Milady, the mansion is on fire! You must not get out of the car at any cost."
At the mention of fire I sat up straight and seriously stared at him. "Is mother and grandpa inside? Are they? Tell me right now goddammit!" I ordered.
I'm starting to panic. Somehow I'm really worried, even if I know that someone must have evacuated them. But there is this certain nagging feeling inside me.
Death, the voice said.
I eyes widened at the possibility, but I dismissed it as fast as the voice whispered it. Shut up, I told the voice.
"M'lady, I will go and check it out, please don't get out," he said, not answering my question, not even minding if I just cursed.
He closed the car door and locked it from the outside. He nodded from the tinted glass and continued to run from what I presumed the mansion's way.
I stared at the thick smoke in the sky. When I am sure that the man will not most likely to comeback, I pulled from what looked like a thick black pin beside the tinted glass, the car unlocked and I opened the door. I jumped out and stared at the large smoke appearing in the sky. I proceeded to the mansion's way.
When I came in front of a huge forest. I know I'm fucked.
I struggled to find my way inside the forest. To tell the truth, I'm fucking pissed of right now, and paranoid. And scared. But I'm damn sure Mother and Grandpa will be out. Safe and sound. But the voice in my head insists I should check it out for myself.
My muscles are sore and I can't run anymore. My lungs seemed like it was on fire, my body screams rest. But bloody hell, I can't. Even if I'm damn sure I'm running a 2 kilometer distance and my body cannot handle the strain of the long run, I need to.
I need to run.
I was not even half way near it when my legs collapsed under and I find it hard to breath. I tried to lift my weight using my hands but every time I tried, my arms would shake. And I'm gonna fall all over again.
Damn hell. Damn fire. Curse everybody!
When I lay my unmoving legs on the pile of leaves, that's when I realize why I kept running even if I'm bloody sure I can't do it. The reason why I kept running even if I can't go on anymore.
That's because I don't want to repeat that scene all over again. I don't want to experience that numbing feeling inside of me. The large dent it bore on my chest. Like there was this pain, and there was not.
Tears slowly fell from my eyes. The pain is haunting me, like it was always under my bed, like it was always hiding in the shadows, like it's always been in the dark. Like it's always been inside of me.
Do you know that numbing feeling you get when you stare into nothing, somehow deep in your head, you're going insane and you want to die?
But then you'll still smile despite the pain that always been consuming you. Your slowly losing the will to live.
You want to die.
And you don't fucking care if you're going to heaven or hell.
You want to die.
Then you started to notice the little things. When your friend chooses to talk to others than you. When you felt like being left out. Like time was traveling so fast for them like a bullet train but to you, it seems like you are slowly drifting. Then try to go to your only salvation.
Then remembered he is killed in front of you. Then you go to the other, only to see she's not the same as before as her cold eyes bore into your soul.
I want to see Mother and Grandpa, that's the only thought in my mind as I struggled to be awake, my heavy eyelids straining to be open. Then it slowly slid shut, the tears still flowing as I looked at the smoky sky.
"Ma'am."
Then someone shook me.
"Ma'am."
I slowly opened my eyes and I saw a grand room with a maid on the bedside.
"Ma'am, you are already late for school," she said then bowed.
What school? I thought I was not going to preschool until next week? And the last thing I remembered-
Tears fell from my eyes.
Why am I crying?
I wiped the flowing liquid from my cheeks, still questioning myself why am I so emotional.
I stood up and noticed that my eye level become some meters higher. And the room where I used to sleep every night in the mansion was nowhere to be seen. But I recognize this room.
This is my past self's room.
I quickly got to the bathroom and looked at my face. Big black eyes staring at me with my brunette hair still messed up. I touched my reflection, wishing it to be more unreal. But it's not. I can feel the heat of the hot water in the bath tub even if it is meters away from me. I can feel the steam that it emits.
I stared at the burn on my cheeks that always reminded me of that painful day.
I can't still believe it.
My dream world is really a dream after all.
Bloody shit.
(1)"Hello. I'm-" "-Marumaya"
(2) Fucking hell.
(3) "Your eyes, is something wrong with your eyes?"
(4) "Your eyes looks sad-""-never mind."
(5) Shit.
These are the corresponding translations of the phrases above. I used google translate so I'm pretty sure it's not accurate. Anyway, the curses seems legit so let's get going!
Please review. I'm begging you. Well that doesn't sound too desperate, does it? Well anyway, reviews~
