A/N- Back at it again with another update. I wouldn't get too comfortable though
Rose was many things; A leader, a friend, a mentor, a lover, a moon non-believer, but one thing that the Gems never expected her to be was a pimp. She got the idea after visiting a human trafficking ring in order to get her 'fix' (It was Kinder Eggs, which are illegal in the USA, mind you), and came home with a fur coat, a sloped hat with a feather on top and a pair of grills.
"Rose, what's with the new look?" Pearl asked her leader. Rose sneered at her, and pulled down her expensive sunglasses to glare at her.
"Excuse me, but you shall only address me as the 'Pimping Quartz of Human Trafficking', slut." Rose growled at her. Pearl gasped, covering her mouth with her hand.
"W-what did you just call me?" Pearl asked shakily. Rose spat at the floor of the temple and walked towards her, suddenly producing a paddle in the shape of a hand from her gem. She whacked Pearl on the butt with it, causing her to yelp.
"Hey, what was that for?" Pearl whimpered out, rubbing her rump. Rose scoffed.
"That, my girl, was the Pimp hand of Discipline, which is what you'll receive if you defy me." Rose explained, poking Pearl in the chest with her finger. She backed away from her and looked around. "Where's Garnet? She has a mighty fine ass that needs to be put to work." Rose growled out. She produced a cigar from her pocket and lit it, taking a puff from it before coughing violently.
"Ack! Son of a Bitch!" Rose cried out, beating on her chest. She flicked the cigar at Pearl (Setting her on fire in the process) and instead pulled out a pack of candy cigarettes from her pocket. She put one in her mouth and began to chew it, ignoring Pearl's screams and how she ran around the room, attempting to put out the fire. Rose grunted and turned away from Pearl, walking towards the Temple door and using her Gem open up her room.
Stepping into her room of clouds, the last thing she expected to find was Garnet receiving a lap dance from a stripper, or that she would be throwing money at said stripper. They both looked at Rose with shock. Embarrassed, Garnet cleared her throat.
"Ahem, y-you weren't supposed to be back yet." Garnet said meekly. Rose continued to stare at her, until a broad grin split across her face.
"Good! I see you are already practicing to become one of my girls." Rose clapped her hands together. "Your name won't be Garnet though, it's too flashy. I'm going to brand you as Uniqua instead!" Rose proclaimed, crossing her arms and looking quite proud of herself. Garnet raised an eyebrow behind her shades.
"You're naming me after a Backyardigan?" Garnet asked her. Rose gasped, rushing over and slapping Garnet upside the head with the Pimp Hand of Discipline.
"No, bad Uniqua! You're not supposed to predict shows before they come out; And don't make fun of my main girl Uniqua!" Rose scolded. Garnet rubbed her cheek, looking up at Rose with a confused look.
"I never made fun of it, and I didn't predict the show! Rose, did you get into Amethyst's stash again?" Garnet looked at Rose strangely. Rose hissed at her, slapping her yet again with the Pimp hand.
"Shut the fuck up, bitch. That was one time and you know it was your fault too!" Rose snapped at her. Garnet put her hands up in defense.
"How was I supposed to know that Amethyst hid all of her kush in a extremely flammable pile?!" Garnet shot back. Rose growled again, and raised up the Pimp Hand once more. This time, Garnet dodged it by jumping out of the chair. the Pimp Hand smashed into the chair, effectively breaking it. Rose turned and glared at Garnet, who was staring at her with wide eyes. She quickly got up and ran away from Rose.
"Oh no you don't! The Pimp Hand is hungry for discipline!" Rose called out, chasing after Garnet. Garnet quickly ran, looking around for the pole that lead her to the burning room. Amidst the pink clouds, she caught sight of a red pole and rushed towards it. Rose was right at her heels. Garnet quickly jumped down the the hole, Rose followed closely after her.
"You can't escape the Pimping Quartz of Human Trafficking! My mentors said I do a good job of hunting!" Rose called out after Garnet during their freefall. Garnet turned around to look her.
"What Mentors?! You were literally out for an hour!" Rose didn't reply, or at least she didn't hear it. Garnet's back made contact with stone with a sickening 'Crack!' , and she let out a groan. She looked up and realized Rose was falling rapidly towards her. She turned to looked at her side, and noticed that Amethyst was passed out beside her (No doubt from huffing paint again). She grabbed her hand and slapped it.
"I tap out" Garnet said, picking up Amethyst and putting her in her spot as she rolled away from the hole. Rose crashed down on amethyst, effectively waking her up.
"Ow, what the hell?!" Amethyst cried out, rolling away from Rose and holding her stomach, she glared at the assaulter. Her glare quickly turned into a look of confusion when she saw who it was, though.
"Rose, what are you doing?" She asked her leader. Rose didn't answer, instead she slapped her with the Pimp Hand. Amethyst let out a small cry and rubbed her head.
"The fuck?!" She said angrily. Rose grinned at her, swinging the pimp hand over her shoulder.
"The Pimp Hand's hunger has been sated, for now!" Rose proclaimed. She stood up and put her hands on her hips, looking down at Amethyst.
"I have decided that your name will be Cinnamon." Rose stated. Amethyst looked up at her, confused. her eyes slowly widened in realization, and she became starry eyed as she gasped.
"Rose, are we pimping now?!" The young Gem asked Rose. Rose smiled at her, nodding. Amethyst let out an exaggerated noise of excitement as she stood up. She pumped her fist in the air.
"Yes! I have a G-String that I have been wanting to use for the longest time now! I'm going to go try it on!" Amethyst ran out of the room. Rose, having nothing else to do, waited for her. Amethyst came back into the room moments later, wearing only a G-String. She posed for Rose.
"How do I look?" She asked seductively. Rose rubbed her chin thoughtfully.
"Hmm, I give you a 10." Rose grinned at her, giving her a thumbs up. Amethyst whooped. Rose walked towards her, putting her hand on her back.
"Now come now, young whore, we need to convert Pearl and Garnet to the way of the pimp." As if on cue, a severely burned Pearl walked into the room, glaring at Rose.
"Rose, this joke as gone on too far- OH LARDY, AMETHYST WHAT ARE YOU WEARING?!" Pearl screeched, covering her eyes with her arms. Amethyst crossed her arms and huffed.
"That's Cinnamon to you." Amethyst corrected her. Pearl uncovered her eyes and stared at her blankly, before faceplaming.
"Oh no, don't tell me you're in on it too." Pearl sighed. Rose let out a grunt, strutting towards Pearl and smacking her upside the head with the Pimp Hand.
"Being a Pimp ain't no game, slut. This is the real deal, I'm running this show. You'll be known as Sweet and Sour sauce for now on. Now, my little papayas, let's go find Garnet and convert her to our pimping ways." Pearl, with no other choice, groaned and followed after Rose and Amethyst.
In an event that later inspired that one scene from "The Empire Strikes Back" where Luke learns about Darth Vader being his father. Rose managed to convert Garnet to the way of the Pimp Hand. After Rose had gathered up the first of her many girls, she set off to become the most famous Pimp in Beach City
"So... My mom didn't believe in the moon... and she was a pimp at one point?" Steven asked slowly, in an attempt to understand everything the gems had been telling him. Pearl nodded.
"I was exaggerating at the last part, she wasn't very famous, but she did become a self-proclaimed pimp." Pearl explained to Steven. He looked at her strangely.
"And she really called you guys Uniqua, Cinnamon, andi Sweet and Sour Sauce?" Steven asked. Pearl nodded once more. Steven looked at Amethyst.
"You went along with it?" He questioned her, Amethyst grinned.
"Yep!" She said, popping the 'P'. Steven looked back at Pearl.
"And she disciplined you with the pimp hand?" Pearl nodded, slightly embarrassed. Finally, Steven looked at Garnet.
"And you were getting a lap dance." He finished. Garnet stared at him blankly.
"We don't talk about that." She stated. She looked towards Amethyst. "I think it's your turn now." Amethyst grinned at her, sitting up from her previous position.
"Damn right! Now, where do I begin?"
A/N- I admittedly had a bit too much fun with this one.