Pain. That was the only thought that was going through my head. Pain.
I was nine centimeters dilated , and it was a long fourteen hours to get to this point. The doctors started checking me every twenty minute rather than every hour and every time they said just a little longer. I wasn't screaming and threatening to decapitate someone like I thought I would have. Instead I was so exhausted, all I could do is moan and cry.
Lissa had come in to tell me 'everyone' was waiting in the lobby, but she never specified who they where, and at that point I didn't care. I was desperate to sleep but I was woken up everytime I managed to dose off by the extreme pain the contractions caused me. Dimitri physical looked like he was in more pain than me, because I was just half dead. He was so gentle with me. I sat up against him with my legs spread just trying to breath normally.
Tears were running down my face when I begged Dimitri to make to pain go away. It wasn't hysterical like when I first arrived, but more drowsy and hopeless. "You can do it Roza, just a little longer." Afterwards I found some of my commentary funny, but I think at the time it just made Dimitri feel worse. It wasn't my intention, I was just saying things to say things.
"Why did you to this to me?" Or "You should try it." Or my personal favorite. "Can I just die instead?" My mother sat in the chair next to the window and the plastic bassinet placed in the room earlier. "Lissa only came in for short periods of time because she hated hospital and seeing me the way I was. "Dimitri, I don't want to do this anymore." I snapped and started to sob. I ached all over and prayed it would all stop. Dimitri started to rub my hand.
"Oh Rose, I'm sorry, don't cry." His voice cracked and changed to something foreign to him. "It'll be over soon." His tone shifted back to the the strong, gentle voice he normally had. "Your going to be okay." The doctor came back in, with a voice that was too cheery for the rooms atmosphere.
"Miss Hathaway, I think we might almost be ready to push." I half heartedly said the word no, but he ignored it. "Let's take a look." After some poking the doctor came to the conclusion that I was finally ten centimeters dilated. "Do you feel like you need to push? Maybe like you need to poop?" I weakly shook my head. "Well I think we can wait for up to another hour, and if you don't by then we'll see what we can do, but if you feel you need to push call for nurse. We'll have this baby delivered soon!" The doctor excused himself and left me in the same delirious pain I was before.
About twenty minutes later another contraction came and made me cry again, only this time I felt the urge to push I was waiting for. After nearly cutting all circulation from Dimitri's hand I said. "I need to push." So quietly I wasn't sure he could here me. My mother got up, and left. "No!"
"Shh, it's okay Roza, she is just going to get the doctor. It's almost over, you're so close baby." I let out a loud moan before falling completely limp just waiting for the doctor. A hoard of nurses came in the room behind my mother. Eventually the doctor came too and directed the nurses to different tasks I didn't pay attention to.
"Well Rose, here we go." He wasted no time checking and confirming I looked ready to push. "So when you next contraction comes in a couple minutes you are going to push for ten second and then rest for ten second, and keep doing that during your contractions. Your baby with be here in no time!" The weak smile I gave didn't show how excited I was really, but between the drugs and the exhaustion I couldn't do much more. Dimitri got off the bed as he was instructed to, even though I didn't want him to. He stood beside me and held my hand and my mother took the other.
"I'm to tired, I can't do this." Surprisingly my mother was the first to say something.
"Rosemarie Hathaway, you are going to deliver this baby wheter you like it or not. You have everyone who loves you, here to support you, and you are ready to be mother than you even know. I know your tired, baby but you need to do this. Come on Rose." It was demanding and nurturing at the same time and it was exactly what I needed to recharge.
"Alright you should start pushing in about a minute, just remember ten seconds." I took a deep breath and swallowed hard. I felt all the muscles in my body start to contract and and I pushed as hard as I could. It was by far the most painful feeling I had ever experienced. I imagined getting throw twenty feet by a stigoi wouldn't even hurt that much.
For almost an hour I was pushing and screaming, until I couldn't feel anything. The whole world stopped, and for a moment there was no pain or fatigue. I felt like I was floating. I heard a scream that wasn't my own. It was tiny but powerful. My baby was crying, my baby was here. I watched the nurses cut the umbilical cord, and quickly put a towel type piece of clothing around it. They lay the baby on my chest and all I could so was cry.
Joining in the tears was my mother and for the first time since I met him, Dimitri. "It's a girl." My smile was so big it hurt.
"Oh Roza, I'm so proud of you." Dimitri only had watery eyes with a few tears, but I was sure I looked like an absolute mess. I put a hand on my baby girls back absolutely terrified I break her in half with one touch. After a moment of peace the nurses took my baby to wash her up and measure her.
Then I got the dreaded reminder that I had to birth the placenta. With the start of another contraction. A while later I let out my final scream and unloaded the much easier to expel placenta. My mother had already left to announce to everyone who was apparently waiting the baby was born. I could here cheers from all the way down the hall. I was all stitched up and then for the first time in almost a day I was given time to relax.
Although I was tired I wanted to hold my little girl again. Luckily a nurse came over and handed her to me. She was little and wrapped in a pink blanket with a hat that was much to big for her on. "She weighed six pounds, one ounce at eighteen inches. Do you have a name picked out?" I looked at Dimitri and then back at the nurse and nodded.
"Maddison Jade Belikov" The nurse smiled and asked for us to spell it for her, and then handed Dimitri a clipboard. "These need to be filled out for the birth certificate, she can't leave until they are filled out." Dimitri filled the whole thing out and only asked for me to sign the section I was supposed to do. While he did that I held Maddison, and talked to her. "You don't know this yet but all three of your names are special to your momma, because they come from three very important people." I knew Dimitri was listening to me so just to make fun of him I said. "I think we should get this out the way though and say I'm your favorite parent, this cradle robber only loves you half as much." I heard a small chuckle from Dimitri before I heard a scream coming for the doorway.
"It's a girl! Oh Rose I'm so happy for you. Oh my god!" Lissa ran over to the side of the bed. "Oh my god she is absolutely precious." She gently stroked on her cheek. "Oh my will you please tell me her name now?!" My absolute feeling of happiness and excitement easily matched hers, I was just to exhausted to show it.
"Maddison, Maddison Jade Belikov." Lissa awed and held on a squeal. Dimitri and I spent some time while we were in Russia talking about names so we had it picked out months ago. We chose one for a girl and one for a boy, but we decided to keep it a secret. "Maddison after Mason." Her Expression dimmed a little. "And Jade after you." I seen the confusion on her face but felt the joy hearing the middle name had something to do with her through the bond.
"Why me? I'm flattered but I don't get it." I knew she wouldn't at first so I explained.
"I knew I wanted to make her middle name relate to you, but I also wanted it to be her own. At first I thought about your moms name, but I decided not to. Then a while ago I remember Adrian made a comment about your eyes, he said they were a perfect shade of Jade green that complimented something I didn't care about. So I got Jade after your eyes, Dimitri liked it and, he was actually the one to come up with Maddison. He was more than a little excited when I suggest just using his last name. So that's how we came up with it." Lissa had tears in her eyes.
"Oh Rose, thank you. Don't even know what to say, I just..."
"I wanted to, you don't have to say anything." I look of realization flashed Lissa's features and the got excited again.
"Smile!" Lissa pulled a camera out of her purse and then pointed it at me. For once I didn't protest and let her take a picture while I held my baby close to me." She waved her hands at Dimitri and told him to get in the picture. She told us to smile again so I did, but right as she took the picture Dimitri kissed me on the side of my forehead. I think Lissa took more pictures but I stopped paying attention to her and for the first time took the opportunity to really look at little Maddison.
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