Chapter Two: His Vice

Natsu stared at the blonde woman, waiting for an answer. Her lips were still parted, surely drying out her mouth. She didn't seem to care as her eyes scanned the man in front of her. Every bottled up emotion Natsu had for her came rushing to the surface, but he forced himself to remain still, not wanting to startle the girl. He was still unsure if this was real, or the most vivid daydream he'd ever had.

Hell, maybe he fell in the shower and never even made it to Fairy Tail tonight. He could be bleeding to death in the tub, dreaming about, well, his dream girl.

"Hi," she finally said, after a few awkward minutes of silence.

Hearing her speak and seeing her speak were two completely different things. He didn't expect his heart to crash against his chest at the sound of her sweet voice, as if the organ was trying to get closer to her. He swallowed hard, still tasting whiskey on his tongue. "How ya been?" He repeated himself, unsure if she heard him the first time.

"Goo-" She stopped herself, her eyes averting his gaze. "Bad," she confessed, looking as if he might shame her for telling the truth.

Taking a second glance at her, she really did look bad. She wasn't dressed like an heiress. She wore a faded red tank top, ripped jeans, no jewelry, and no make up. Her hair definitely needed a brush ran through it, dark bags were under her eyes, and her skin looked oddly pale. Of course the skin color could be because he hadn't seen her in so long. Maybe that's just what she looked like now. The only thing that looked 'high maintenance' on her, was her fake, blue nails.

"You look terrible," he blurted out, wincing when she slapped his arm.

"Hey! You're not supposed to tell a girl that!" She ran her fingers through her hair as if it would magically make it better. It didn't. A bit of pink tinted her cheeks, but he figured it was due to her being embarrassed, and not flustered.

He used to love making her blush.

"Whatcha doing in this place?" He asked, knowing this place was below the standards of an heiress. Sure she was still Lucy, but he never thought she'd be in a bar... Especially on a Thursday night in Magnolia.

"Well I could probably ask you the same thing?" She cocked her head, giving him a wane smile. It didn't reach her eyes, letting him know she was forcing the expression. Still, the little smile stung his heart. He struggled to come up with an answer to her question.

Immediately, he felt his ears burning up when he realized he had none. It felt like the area raised at least ten degrees. He tugged his scarf from the inside of his hoodie, cooling him down some in the process. "I uhh," how was he supposed to say "this is my tradition after I get dumped. I come here, drink til I forget, then go back home to my lonely apartment where even my cat seems annoyed with me... All because I can't get over... well... you."

No, he definitely couldn't tell her that.

"Drinking," he finally answered, showing her his empty glass as if she hadn't seen it already. "You want another round?" He offered, remembering how he used to buy all her drinks back when they were in high school. Of course those drinks were of the non-alcoholic variety, and usually ended up being pink lemonade or soda.

Lucy's smile grew, her eyes showing the faintest sign of life as she said, "well if you're buying then you know I'll drink."

"What'll you have," Natsu asked, raising his hand to catch the bartender's attention. He was relieved for the subject change, because his heart couldn't stand to beat much faster. His palms even started getting sweaty, something that hadn't happened in years. He was unbelievably nervous, and he couldn't seem to get a grip on himself.

"Make it a seven on seven," Lucy said, eyes flashing over to the white haired girl who was now in front of them.

Before Lisanna could say anything, Natsu asked, "do you want it on the rocks?"

She nodded, letting them both know what she wanted. They watched the bartender pour the whiskey into the ice-filled glass. Then she mixed in the 7 Up, stirring it before handing it to the blonde. "Enjoy," Lisanna said before turning to Natsu. "What about you?"

"Let's get some shots," he glanced over to Lucy, seeing she wasn't objecting. "Two shots of Grey Goose."

A white brow rose at the request. Natsu never changed his order, always getting the fire whiskey when he came in. It was his vice, and she never thought he'd try something different. She held back a smirk as she went to get the top shelf liquor. She didn't need to ask, knowing this would all go on his tab.

Lucy sipped her mixed drink while Natsu ran a hand through his hair. He had thought about seeing Lucy again so many times, thought about what he'd say when they finally reunited, but none of that came to mind now. He was drawing a blank, wondering what he could possibly say.

His green eyes flitted back to her drink, then they widened when he saw her left hand. "You're not wearing your wedding ring," he commented without thinking. He realized it sounded rude to say when he saw her flinch.

"Oh," she pulled her hand back, letting her drink block his view. "I, I lost it."

The tiniest bit of hope that seemed to come to life in Natsu's body died in an instant. He thought, well it doesn't matter what he thought now. Besides, he clearly saw the spot where her ring should have been. It was lighter than the rest, the classic wedding band tan line.

He felt stupid.

Pathetic and stupid.

"Always losing stuff," he choked out, feeling like he was in a losing battle with himself. 'Where the hell is Lisanna with those shots?'

"Here you go," the bartender said, startling him. He swore she showed up out of nowhere, but he was probably just zoning out again. He had a habit of doing that a lot. It helped the time pass by faster.

"Thanks," Natsu grabbed the shot, sliding the other one to Lucy. "Cheers?" He held it out, waiting for her to pick up the tiny glass.

She took it, moving her hand so the rim could clink with his own. They brought them to their lips, opening their mouths and letting the strong liquid pour down their throats. Lucy slammed her glass down, choking as the burn made its way through her system. "Fuck," she hissed.

Natsu felt the familiar burn, but he didn't have as strong of a reaction as Lucy did. He guessed she didn't drink very often, or if she did, it wasn't strong stuff. As sad as it was to admit, Natsu spent the nights he was single drinking. It helped numb the pain. When he dated women, it was easier to control the urge, because he had someone to keep him distracted from his painful thoughts.

Tonight... well he wasn't sure what tonight was. He hadn't gotten drunk with anyone in a while. The last time was with the girl he used as a booty call every now and then, but in his defense, she used him just the same. That was the only girl he could be himself with, because she might have been just as fucked up as him.

She was the only girl who didn't get mad at him when he slipped up and called her 'Lucy' in bed. Of course in return, the girl called him by a different name. They had an understanding, no matter how messed up it might be. It worked for them, and that was all that mattered at the time.

It wasn't the best deal in the world, since his booty call looked nothing like the gorgeous girl in front of him, aside from her blonde hair. His fingers twitched, wanting to touch Lucy's golden locks. He resisted the urge, knowing it would overstep a boundary.

Lucy was a married woman. He couldn't have her, no matter how much he wanted her. It was probably a bad thing seeing her again. It only reminded him of how much pain and anguish he'd been through the last four years. All the lonely nights, all the drunken hookups, all the tears.

"How late are you staying out?" Lucy asked, glancing over to a dusty clock on the wall. She successfully brought him out of his second attempt at zoning out, or maybe it was his third? He wasn't really good at handling himself when he got like this.

Natsu never paid attention to the time when he was at the bar. The bartender -whoever it happened to be whenever he came in to get drunk- always knew when to cut him off, sending him home in a cab so he didn't disturb the peace. The walk to his apartment wasn't very long, but his wobbly legs weren't good for shit after he got trashed, plus he tended to spout off about random shit that no one cared to hear. It was better to send him home so he could just pass out on his couch, always being too drunk to make it to his bed.

"As late as I can." He glared at the clock, as if it were trying to defy him. "I'm not gonna let some tick tock stop me from having a good time." 'Or a bad time...'

Lucy let out a giggle, the sound making Natsu's heart ache. He still had it bad for her, even after four years. He felt a heaviness settle on his chest, or maybe it was the alcohol finally kicking in... who knew? He sure didn't.

He finally fully looked at her, unknowingly revealing the one major change to himself since she left. "Oh god! What happened to your face?"

Natsu jolted away from her shriek, his sensitive ears stinging from her sudden outburst. His fingers came up on instinct, wondering what she was talking about. It wasn't until the pads of his fingertips rubbed over the jagged piece of flesh running up his right cheek, that he realized what she meant.

"Oh, this?" He asked, his digits tracing the scar. "I got it during a fight with my brother."

"Zeref did that to you? On purpose?"

"No, it was an accident. Fucker didn't take off his ring before he punched me. We were just messing around. It wasn't supposed to leave me disfigured," Natsu grumbled, remembering how much his face bled when it happened. "That was a few years ago."

The blonde's startled eyes finally calmed down when she realized how inappropriate her reaction was. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be so rude."

"I'm sure you didn't," he mumbled, now self-conscious about his face. The pang in his heart only grew stronger the more those brown eyes watched him. It was easier to be mad at her than to face his own issues.

"You don't look disfigured," she finally offered, her tone soft. "I was just surprised is all. I'm sorry..."

"Don't worry about it," Natsu couldn't meet her gaze, feeling out of place, which was odd since this was usually the only place he didn't feel judged. "I'm used to it now."

"So," Lucy started slowly, sipping at her mixed drink again. It was already half gone. "H-have you been dating?" She didn't know what else to say.

The pang in his chest was still felt even with his body going numb. 'Getting personal that fast?' He figured they were due some questions, conversations, but he thought they'd start out lighter like, "how's your family." Speaking of which, he wondered how her family was.

If he wanted to ask, he had to get past her question first. "Yeah, a bit," he mumbled, hoping that was enough. Clearly it wasn't.

"Do you have a girlfriend?"

He suppressed the urge to sigh, "nope. Newly single."

She raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

"I just got dumped a few hours ago," he muttered quickly, wishing his voice didn't sound so angry. He wasn't upset that his girlfriend broke up with him, he just didn't want to talk about it. He wondered if it would be rude to abruptly change the subject.

"I'm sorry to hear that," Lucy said timidly, lowing her eyes to her drink.

'Yeah, I bet you are,' he thought, knowing it would probably make her happy if he was with someone. She must have known how hard it was for him to try to move on after she left, so if he was with someone, it could lessen her guilt.

The sigh he was holding back finally emerged, letting out his frustration. There was no reason for Lucy to feel guilty, and he knew that. It wasn't her fault he fell for a girl he could never have. Even if things turned out differently, and she wasn't forced to marry that douche, he still couldn't have her. Jude Heartfilia, her father, made sure to drill that little knowledge in his head early on.

"My daughter is destined to marry someone of worth. I'll allow you to be her friend, but know that nothing else can come of it. She deserves someone with a title, not some kid who will never amount to anything. Do you understand, boy?"

"I hear you loud and clear," Natsu grumbled, his fifteen year old self feeling lower than dirt. "I won't mess up her future."

"Good. You can go play with my daughter now, but if I see you or hear of you crossing a line, there will be consequences."

The younger Natsu shuttered, not knowing exactly what he meant. It was the main reason he never made a move on Lucy, for fear of what he might do.

Natsu shook his head, ridding himself of the first memory he had of Lucy's father. Over the years the man eventually warmed up to the pink haired teen, but it still wasn't enough. No matter what he did, he could never be good enough for his 'precious daughter'.

He just wished Lucy had her own choice on who she'd end up with. He felt like maybe if she did, he might have had a chance at winning her heart. He knew if he did, he'd do whatever it took to keep her happy. He loved her, more than he loved himself. She was his everything, but he was just her friend. It didn't seem fair, but that was life.

It was then that he realized he hadn't said anything for a few minutes. "Don't be sorry," he tried to laugh, but it sounded mangled and bitter. "I'm fine, really."

"Is that why you're drinking?" She looked almost scared to ask, but he couldn't blame her. He made things awkward by admitting that he got kicked to the curb. It really wasn't something to bring up to the married woman he couldn't have, but still longed for.

"Kinda," he really didn't want to mention his tradition. He already felt pathetic. He didn't want to add to it. Especially since this was the first time seeing his best friend in years. 'Am I still her best friend?' The question nagged him more and more with every passing second.

'No. She would have tried to keep in touch if I was. I doubt I'm anything to her now...'

"What are you doing in Magnolia?" He asked, changing the topic. He was tired of talking about himself, since he rarely ever did it. He definitely noticed her body tense at the simple question. He could see goosebumps forming on her arms as she stalled to answer.

Natsu figured he made her upset, but he didn't know how. "If you don't want to say, that's fine."

She remained silent, letting him know she didn't want to answer. He sighed, trying to think of something to say. This really wasn't going like he thought it might have, but of course in all his daydreams he wasn't trying to get drunk at a bar when they had their little reunion.

"How was the wedding?" He asked, instantly regretting his question. He knew better than to bring it up, but still his dumb brain thought it'd be the perfect conversation starter.

"It was good," she said, neither looking at each other. "I wish you could have gone." It felt like a whole minute passed before she added, "I hope you understand why you weren't invited."

"Oh I understand perfectly," he sneered, then quickly grunted, "sorry..." He hated that he kept jumping back and forth between passive aggressive and friendly. He knew it was making things worse, but he couldn't help himself. He didn't think alcohol was to blame either. He was just dealing with a shit-ton of emotions bubbling up inside him, threatening to spill out due to his stubborn attempt at keeping them down for years. He wished things were easier between them, but he doubted it was possible. Not now anyway, and maybe not ever...

"It's okay..."

"I'm actually glad you didn't invite me," he assured. There was no way he would have enjoyed himself being at a wedding where Lucy wasn't his bride. In a hushed voice, he whispered, "I probably would have tried to steal you away..."

Natsu was sure she didn't hear him. She sipped her drink until all that was left was ice. Music started playing in the background, filling in the silence. He forgot on Thursday nights they had live bands play. He hadn't heard of this cover band, but the music was actually pretty good.

He was so caught up in the lyrics that he almost missed Lucy whisper, "I wish you would have."

His eyes snapped over to the blonde, but she was looking away from him. Her head was turned, leaving her eyes a mystery. She raised her hand, signalling Lisanna. The white haired woman came up, a cheerful smile on her face as she asked, "need another?"

"I was actually going to ask if I could get something sweet. Do you have any drinks with pink lemonade in them?" Lucy's simple question made Natsu's blood roar. Every memory involving pink lemonade and the blonde came crashing to the front of his mind. One in particular stuck out among the rest.

"Could you stop slurping so loud?" The teenage girl groaned as she listened to her best friend sip the last remaining drops out of his cup.

"But it's soooo good!" Natsu sipped more, filling the air with the annoying noise.

"It can't be thaaat good," Lucy reasoned, scooting closer to the pink haired teen. They were on the couch in her living room, all their other friends had already left for the day. Natsu had convinced her to walk down the street to buy slushies about twenty minutes ago, which she was now regretting saying yes to the silly request, since he was making so much noise.

"It's pretty damn good," he laughed, holding out his drink for her to try. "Have a taste."

She glanced down at the chewed up straw, then back at those green eyes. Natsu expected her to swat his empty drink away, since she didn't like the mango flavor he chose. What he didn't expect was her to lean in, her soft lips easily capturing his since he was caught off guard.

His eyes widened, but his body remained still. The kiss was brief, lasting maybe a few seconds. When she pulled back, he noticed the slight moisture on her lips. His tongue flicked out, running along his bottom lip as he tried to make sense of what just happened.

The only thing he could think of was, 'damn. Maybe next time I'll get the pink lemonade flavor...'

Of course that memory was marred by the fact that Lucy immediately apologized, saying she didn't know what came over her. Before Natsu had a chance to tell her he actually enjoyed the kiss, she asked him if they could pretend it never happened. She practically begged him to forget...

Pain pricked at his heart, and his throat closed up from the memory of his first kiss. He felt like a heavy weight was sitting on his chest, making it difficult to breathe.

"I need to take a piss," Natsu announced, not waiting for a reply. He stood up, leaving Lucy and Lisanna with questioning expressions.

The blonde watched the pink haired man roam through the bar until he disappeared down a hall that she assumed was where the bathrooms were located.

"He sure has changed, hasn't he?" Lisanna's voice rang in Lucy's ear.

The blonde turned to her old friend, cocking her head. "He has?" She could tell he had a little. His attitude wasn't as bright anymore, his anger getting the better of him. She was trying to ignore it, but it was becoming difficult.

"He hasn't been the same since you left," the bartender started as she poured Lucy another drink. "I worry about him... We all do..."

Lucy was about to ask what she meant, but Lisanna was already sliding the pink drink in front of her. "I don't know what you're doing in town, but try to be easy on him..."

The white haired woman looked over towards the bathrooms, seeing Natsu was already heading back to the bar. The frown on his face was enough to let her know this night wasn't turning out like he hoped. She saw him run his hand through his hair, ruffling it more.

The blonde wanted to ask what she meant. Was she being hard on him? And why was everyone worrying about him? She assumed he was just upset because he got dumped recently, but maybe there was another reason?

Before Natsu reached the bar, Lisanna whispered, "please don't break his heart again." Her voice wasn't threatening or harsh. Instead it was filled with a sadness that could only come from truly caring about her friend's well-being.

Lucy looked stunned, hurt by what Lisanna was implying. "What do you mean?"

The bartender sighed, "he's not here just because he broke up with his girlfriend." That was all she said before walking away to tend to another group of people who called her over for more drinks. Natsu took a seat at the bar, a faraway look in his deep green eyes.

"Natsu..." She spoke, gaining his attention. He looked up at her surprised, as if he hadn't noticed she was there. She waited a few seconds before saying, "be honest with me... Did I break your heart?"

I really didn't expect people to like this story so much, but I'm so glad you are! I think you guys like seeing Natsu suffer... It's okay, I do too. (Evil points? Please, I need to earn them... for reasons...)

Thank you so much for the favorites/follows, and for the reviews from fanficlove2014, ArachDraco, katiekat2001, AnimeArmorFreak, SakuraStar1862, Guest, Tolazytosignin, Crimsonlink310, FlameDragonHime, Guest, mluce17, and Volleyball228!

Until next time with, Chapter Three: Her Vice