Warning! Slight triggers! There's a paragraph or two on self-harm towards the end. Also, this chapter is over 8,000 words long. Read at your own pace, don't try to force it. Give yourself time, and enjoy!
Chapter Nine: New Path
Natsu stared at Lucy. They both stood in the hall outside his apartment, speechless for a moment.
"You're really here," he mumbled under his breath, eyes locked on her own.
"I tried to call, but I kept getting sent to voicemail," she explained, not noticing the slight shake to his body. "I was scared you went to work or something. Some of this food is perishable, and I didn't want it to spoil."
"F-food?" He didn't know if he said anything or not, but Lucy nodded, so he guessed he did.
"Yeah. I wanted to do the cliché thing of making you breakfast the next morning, but all you had was fish and an empty bottle of milk..." She giggled, "I checked your freezer, but I don't think frozen mac and cheese would be a very good breakfast."
Natsu couldn't rip his eyes away from her. 'She's really here... She... She didn't leave me...' He honestly couldn't believe it. He was so convinced that history had repeated itself, that he didn't think for a second that she could be out buying groceries, of all things!
"I borrowed your shirt," Lucy said, tugging at the hem of his dark green shirt. It was baggy on her, hiding her curvy figure, but he practically had it memorized after last night. "I couldn't find my tank top this morning, so I had to improvise. I hope you don't mind."
The pink haired man remained silent. He heard every word she said, he just couldn't get himself to reply. He was still in awe over her presence.
"I-umm, I also used some of your mouthwash," she put a hand behind her neck, a faint blush surfacing on her cheeks. "I almost used your toothbrush, but that might be gross. Don't worry though, I bought my own while I was out..." She gave him an uneasy grin when he didn't answer her. "I was hoping I could keep it here... Since you said I could stay here. I don't want to impose, and I can leave once I find a place. I don't want to inconvenience you anymore than I already have."
"Lucy," her name slipped through his lips. He barely realized he said it, but he saw the way she jolted.
"So you can talk," the blonde teased, giving him a wink. "I was starting to think you went mute." She glanced down at the bags, then up at him again. "Do you even eat breakfast? I know you did when we were in high school, but sometimes people change, and I just-"
Lucy didn't notice when Natsu dropped his donuts and coffee and walked straight up to her. Within seconds, he had his warm arms wrapped tightly around her, scared that if he loosened up, she might leave. It was irrational, but he didn't care. He felt the stinging sensation behind his eyes as they built up tears of shame and regret. He didn't want to cry, but damn it, the tears wouldn't stop flowing.
"I-I th-thought you l-left," he sobbed, not minding if he didn't sound masculine. He was hurting, even with her in his arms. The dull pain in his heart felt like it would never go away, and he doubted it ever would. Four years of pain couldn't be erased by one night of passion. It just couldn't.
Lucy's eyes softened, her own arms coming up to hug Natsu back. She didn't know she would hurt him by leaving, even if it was for a short shopping trip. She knew she should've left a note, but she only realized her mistake when she arrived to get her car from Fairy Tail's parking lot. Now she felt like a jerk, but judging by the way Natsu cradled her against his body, and how the shirt she was wearing was getting wet with tears, she guessed he'd forgive her.
"I'm sorry," she whispered. She never wanted to make him feel pain again, but that's exactly what she did. Now that they were so close, she could feel his body shaking. "I promise, I won't leave you again." She knew it was a white lie. She would have to 'leave' at some point. She couldn't follow him around twenty-four/seven for the rest of their lives.
But as far as being with him, no. She would never leave him again.
"I love you Natsu," she mumbled against his hair. He moved until his face was in the crook of her neck, wetting her skin as he continued to let out his bottled pain.
He sniffed back some snot, slowly letting the embarrassment cloud his mind. He pulled away reluctantly, keeping his head low so his pink locks covered his red, swollen eyes. He'd already cried today, but for different reasons. "I-I, I'm sorry," he sounded so defeated, so broken.
Lucy shook her head, "there's nothing to feel sorry for."
He nodded, but she could still see the way his bottom lip quivered. She really didn't know how deep his heartache ran. "I'm scared I'm going to lose you again," Natsu confessed, fresh tears racing down his red cheeks.
"I'm not going anywhere," it was another white lie, but he would find out the truth soon enough. "Should we go inside? I can make you breakfast?" Maybe after he had some food and calmed down, they could talk, and she could tell him about her plans.
"Y-yeah," he said hoarsely. His hand dipped into his pockets, then pulled out his keys. As he opened the door, Lucy grabbed her shopping bags. While she entered his apartment, he picked up his spilled coffee and dirty donuts. 'Oops...' The carpeted floor in the hall was already soaking up the dark brown liquid, so there was not much he could do.
Lucy got straight to work when she reached his kitchen. She didn't want to give him a chance to get upset again, so she dived into cooking, wanting to ease his pain in the only way she knew how. 'The way to a man's heart is through his stomach,' she thought as she cracked some eggs. She used to cook every once in a while for Natsu when they were in high school, so she had an idea on what he liked.
She set some coffee to brew, thankful that he had some in one of his cupboards. He didn't appear to have any creamers or sweeteners, so they'd have to take it black. She didn't mind, since it would help wake her up. Despite being up for hours, her head still pounded with a hangover. She didn't drink normally, and forgot she was supposed to drink water to negate these effects.
A shadow loomed over her. "Yes?" She asked as she used a fork to fluff the eggs.
Before Natsu spoke, she was already placing some bacon strips on a frying pan. "Why didn't you wake me up, or something?" His voice retained a gravely feel to it, but otherwise he sounded normal.
She suppressed the urge to giggle. "I tried, but nothing I did seemed to do the trick. I even tried tickling you, but you were out cold."
Natsu flushed, imagining Lucy's fingers all over his body, only for him to remain asleep. It was true, he was a heavy sleeper. Years of drinking didn't help with the matter either, making the only way for him to wake up by alarm, or by his own doing. "Oh..."
"I set an alarm, hoping it would wake you up in time for me to come back, but I didn't think it'd take so long at the grocery store. I'm sorry I didn't leave a note though," she admitted as she flipped the bacon that was now sizzling. "It was pretty crappy of me..."
"No," Natsu muttered, his warm hands rested on her hips. He didn't have any reason to touch her other than confirming that she was really standing in front of him. "I kinda overreacted..."
"Well," Lucy glanced around his apartment. It didn't look any different from this morning, except now Happy was munching on a piece of fish. "Compared to how you used to act, I'd say you did good. I remember you used to break things without even trying."
They both laughed softly, letting the nostalgic memories take over.
Lucy remembered one time Natsu and Gray almost burned down their classroom because they were fighting over who got to start the fire for their Bunsen burner. Gray insinuated that Natsu didn't know what he was doing, so he tried to prove him wrong. Natsu was using the striker, and Gray was trying to grab it away from him. During the struggle, one of them accidentally knocked the lever, turning the gas on full blast. He tried to light the gas, but ended up setting Gray's shirt sleeve on fire in the process. The raven haired male had to strip off his shirt in a flash, then he threw it away from their table. It landed on someone else's already lit Bunsen burner, and completely caught on fire. If it weren't for Levy's quick actions, they would have surely burned everything. Thank goodness the fire extinguisher was by the bookworm's desk. Lucy had been so shocked watching the whole thing that she remained still at her table, unable to move a muscle.
Before Lucy could let herself get caught up in another memory, she asked, "so why was there almost no food in your place?"
The question startled Natsu out of his own memory, this one involving Erza and a fight behind the school -that he unfortunately lost.
"Oh, I-" He flushed, not knowing if he wanted to tell her the truth or not. There was no point in hiding it though, especially if he wanted to be with Lucy. Trust was key. "I don't do a lot of cooking. Usually I just eat microwavable meals," he didn't add, 'unless I'm in a relationship... Then usually the girl cooks or I get take out.'
"Ehhh," Lucy made a face of disgust. For the past four years she'd been wined and dined pretty well, despite her terrible circumstances with her soon-to-be ex-husband. "Well, lucky for you, I know how to cook some stuff." She finished her sentence off while flipping the eggs. "I don't know a whole lot, but I can keep you fed."
Natsu nuzzled his nose into the back of her neck, smelling the scent of her shampoo. It wasn't the same smell as when she was in high school, but it still smelled nice. "I'd like that." Then he mumbled, "I was gonna go grocery shopping later today though... If you want to go with me."
Lucy sighed. She wanted to put this conversation off until later. "Actually, there's something I need to talk to you about. I was going to wait until you ate first."
"Okay," Natsu nodded against her skin, feeling her messy bun rub his forehead, "I can wait." He had no intentions of rushing her. He was just glad she came back.
Without another word, Natsu separated from Lucy as she placed the food on two plates. At least his dishes were clean. It was the only bright side of never cooking, he never had dirty dishes. Usually he used paper plates when it was just him, cutting down on the clean up time.
Lucy handed him a cup of coffee and his plate. It had three fried eggs and six pieces of bacon. Lucy's plate had a lot less, but that was because she normally didn't eat breakfast. She made an exception this morning so they could talk.
The blonde followed him to his table. It was a bit messy with random papers on it, so they had to push some things aside before they could get to eat. The pink haired man started into his food. Her cooking was just as amazing as he remembered. His heart almost leaped out of his chest as he chewed his breakfast. He hoped this wasn't the only time he got to enjoy Lucy's cooking. It was the best he'd eaten in years, but that might be due to who made it.
Natsu gulped down four pieces of bacon and two eggs before he heard Lucy clear her throat.
The pink haired man glanced up at her, seeing her look to the side. She opened her mouth a few times, as if debating if she should speak or not. Finally, after a few moments of silence and a sip of coffee, she said, "I think we need to talk about our next move."
"What do you mean?" He asked, curious as to what she meant specifically. She could be referring to many different things, so he needed clarity before he let his mind spiral out of control like it usually did.
"For starters," she chewed on her bottom lip, and his eyes dropped to watch the movement. Even when she was being serious, she still looked adorable. It made him want to reach across the table and kiss her, but he knew it wasn't the time for those types of activities. He waited until she released her swollen lip. "Us."
"What about us?"
"I don't want you to think you're just some rebound," she admitted. "I'm scared you're going to think I'm not serious about this, but I am. I-I really want to be with you, but I don't want you having doubts."
Natsu understood completely. He had doubts earlier this morning. Even now, he still wondered if she would leave him again. It wasn't a healthy way to think, so he knew why she'd be afraid of that. Being honest, he said, "I do still worry... But I think... I think time is the only way to fix that. I can't know you're serious unless I see it for myself."
Lucy nodded. "Fair enough. We have all the time in the world," a small smile spread on her lips, but she was still holding back. "There's... more... It's about my husband."
Natsu's brows furrowed. For the smallest amount of time, he forgot she was married. He forgot all about the abuse she'd been put through, and all about his four years of heartache. It didn't last long at all, and perhaps that was a good thing. It was stupid to ignore things like that, especially when they were so crucial. With a strained jaw, he groused, "what about him?"
The blonde glanced down at her plate, seeing that she had barely nibbled on one strip of bacon. Her stomach was rumbling, but she had no appetite, not when her mind was racing with problems. "I already filed for divorce, but..."
He held his breath, waiting for her to say something else. He wanted to demand that she finished that sentence. It took everything in him not to ask. His thoughts already when to the worst case scenarios, but it was all for nothing.
"... I want to press charges against him... for, well..." She swallowed, feeling her throat tighten. "For hitting me, and..." Still, she couldn't say the word 'rape'. Part of her still felt like it was her fault, and she doubted that would ever go away. Maybe with counseling she could learn to function normally again. There was no telling how deep her damage really ran, but she wanted to get better.
It wasn't for Natsu's sake, it was for her own. She loved last night, because it was the first night in years that she didn't have a nightmare about her husband's abuse. She didn't know if Natsu being with her had anything to do with it, but she didn't want to rely completely on him to heal herself. It wasn't fair to Natsu, and it wasn't healthy either.
"...and.. r-ra..." her words fell short. If she couldn't even say it in the presence of the only man she trusted, how was she supposed to tell a police officer, or a judge! "Maybe I should just leave it alone."
"I don't think that's a good idea," Natsu finally spoke. "You shouldn't let him get away with it. What's to stop him from doing it to the next girl? Or the one after that?"
Lucy's eyes slowly raised until they landed on the pink haired man. "I know you're right, but..."
"It's hard?" Natsu guessed. When she nodded, he sighed, "I know it'll be hard, and probably embarrassing, but if you can stop him from doing it again, it'll be worth it. Even if you're not doing it for you, you'd still be doing the world some good by getting a rapist off the streets."
Lucy flinched hard at the word 'rapist'. For years she had convinced herself that her husband's behaviors were normal. She was the wife, she was supposed to have sex with him. Deep in her heart she knew the truth, but she spent so long warping that truth until it made sense to her, until it no longer made her feel so disgusting. Unfortunately, it didn't always work. She felt used, degraded, like damaged goods.
The blonde jolted back when she felt warm fingers on her face. She gasped, then realized it was just Natsu. He brushed away the tears that were now flowing down her cheeks. It looked like she didn't realize she was crying, so lost in her own thoughts. "When it comes down to it, it's what you want Luce. I can't force you to do something you don't want. No one can," he stressed, hoping she understood his hidden meaning. No one, not even her husband could force her to do something she didn't want to do, and if he tried -which he did, multiple times- then he should be punished.
The irrational side of Natsu wanted to go straight up to her husband and beat him until he couldn't breathe, cut off his dick, then tie him up naked in the middle of town with a huge sign that said 'rapist' hanging from his neck. He almost got hard just thinking about exacting Lucy's revenge in the most savage way possible.
Of course the more sane side of Natsu said the police should probably handle the issue. He didn't want to go to prison himself over this, even if something in his gut told him it'd be worth it, for Lucy.
"I guess I'll have time to think about it during the drive," she muttered, and he almost didn't hear her because his thoughts wandered back to harming her good-for-nothing husband.
"Drive?" He asked, his stomach twisting as he thought about her leaving mixed with the idea of a vehicle. It was almost pathetic that just the mention of a car could get him sick.
"That's another thing I wanted to talk to you about," Lucy admitted, her brown eyes were now dry, but her shed tears still stained her pale cheeks. "I need to go back to Crocus to get my stuff, and... and I was wondering if you'd come with me."
"Yes," he said without hesitation. Vehicles be damned, he wasn't going to turn down the chance to be with Lucy, especially if she was going back to that douche's hometown, where she technically lived. As an after thought, he asked, "you're driving there? Isn't it far?"
"A full day's drive, usually twenty-four hours, give or take some time for traffic and stops. I know you don't like to, but I remember in high school sometimes you'd drive your dad's truck if you took those pills... Do they still work?"
"Yeah," Natsu nodded, feeling his stomach churn, "still gives me side effects, but I can manage. You want me to drive some too so we don't have to stop?"
"That was the idea," she admitted, her cheeks burning as they turned red. "That's presumptuous of me, huh? Just assuming you'd come along and drive too..."
The pink haired male's hand slowly rested on her cheek, "I'd do anything for you." His green eyes were completely on her, boring into her very soul. "Anything," he repeated, his voice as strong and calm as could be. He wasn't lying. He would kill and die for her, because that's how much his damaged heart loved her.
Lucy stared in awe. The intensity in his eyes stunned her for a second. "Umm, great," she said, but her tone was lacking enthusiasm. All she could think about was how much she loved this man, and how serious he could be when needed.
Without thinking, she leaned in. Natsu didn't wait for her to come to him, deciding to lean in as well, capturing her lips in an instant. The kiss was slow, neither one wanting to rush things. Mouths opened, but tongues didn't invade. Natsu sucked lazily on her bottom lip, giving it a little tender loving care since she chewed on it earlier, and Lucy hummed at the sensation. Overall the kiss lasted about a minute before they pulled away, eyes hooded from the pleasure.
A large, goofy grin was planted on Natsu's face. Pink dusted across his cheeks and nose, but he didn't notice it. He was too busy watching Lucy's face grow steadily red from his attention. Seeing that she was more calm, and not about to cry again, he stood up fully. Taking two steps away, he sat back down in his chair. "Eat up," he gently instructed. "It's gonna be a loooong drive. You'll need your energy."
The blonde nodded, then looked at her food. It wasn't as hot anymore, but at least now she had her appetite back. They ate their breakfast, occasionally looking up to steal a glance at the other before quickly looking back down to their plate. It almost felt like they were two shy teenagers, even after everything they'd been through.
When they both finished, Natsu grabbed their plates, then went to the sink to wash the dishes. It was only fair, since she cooked, he could clean up. Lucy strolled up behind him, leaning on the opposite counter as he washed both forks.
"I want to file a restraining order," she blurted out, changing the mood considerably. Natsu barely nodded his head, waiting to hear more. "When we get back here, I need to find a job so I can get my own place."
That made Natsu tense. "Why? I thought you were staying with me?"
"Until I found somewhere else to live," she clarified. "I don't want to impose. You're being very generous right now, but I don't want to take advantage of you."
"You're not taking advantage of me," he turned his head, but continued to scrub at the plate he just picked up. "I love having you around. You make everything, brighter."
Lucy flushed, then avoided his gaze. "You don't think I'm inconveniencing you?"
A small laugh sounded from the pink haired man, "no way. I'd be sad if you left... Not that I'm saying you have to stay, just that I want you to. It's completely up to you though, but I want you to know where I stand." He rushed out the last part, hoping he didn't offend her by implying that she should stay so he didn't get upset. That's the last thing he wanted to happen, her staying out of guilt.
"If you promise it's okay, then I'll stay."
Natsu saw her look up at him finally. Her eyes were watery, but she was holding back the tears. He couldn't imagine what was going on in her mind. Rinsing his hands off and drying them, he turned to face her fully. "Lucy Heartfilia, I would love it if you stayed with me at my apartment."
Before she could answer, she felt something brush against her leg. She glanced down, seeing the blue cat rub himself against her.
"And Happy agrees. He wants you here too," Natsu smiled, glad that the cat was on his side.
"Then I guess it's settled, I'm staying here now."
Ignoring his wet hands, the man wrapped Lucy in a tight hug. "Awesome!" She laughed, and he kissed her neck. It felt, almost too perfect. It felt so right, being with her, in this place, with his cat rubbing around their ankles... It felt like a home with her around.
"I love you, Lucy," he confessed against her tender flesh. Placing another kiss to her neck, he mumbled, "so so much."
As Lucy started talking, Natsu continued to place open mouthed kisses to her skin. "When do you have...mmmm, to uh, be at... at work again," the blonde was losing concentration as his hands came up to rest on her waist, kneading her body with his fingers.
"Monday," he said before licking up to her jawline. "I'll have to call Gray and tell him to look after Happy while we're gone..."
Lucy's breathing picked up as she tried to stay composed. She knew she could tell him to stop, and he actually would, but she enjoyed the way he touched her. It was filled with love and respect, and not at all forced, or used for an ulterior motive. Natsu only wanted them to feel pleasure, not pain or humiliation.
"If we leave... Ohhh," she gasped when he nipped at her neck. "If ummm, if we leave soon, we can get to Cro-ooohh, Cr-Crocus by tomorrow morning..." A drawn out moan slipped past her lips when Natsu sucked on her earlobe.
"Well then we should probably leave soon," he breathed in her ear, sending delicious chills through her veins. Despite his words, he continued to play with her body. Now he left no gaps between them, the hardness in his pants rubbing against her hip.
"When we get there," Lucy closed her eyes, tilting her head back to allow easier access for his wandering tongue. "I, umm, need to... to see my father..."
At the mention of Jude Heartfilia, Natsu pulled away. It wasn't that he was upset she was going to see him, it was just that he didn't like thrusting up against her while she talked about her old man.
Blinking away the lust in her eyes, Lucy cleared her throat, "I called him this morning." She lifted her brows, trying to will away the pressure that had built between her legs from Natsu's touches. "He knows I'm coming back, and he offered to buy me and you plane tickets to come back to Magnolia when we're done there."
"He bought me a ticket?" The pink haired man asked, his hand pressing against his stomach while he tried to not think about getting on a plane. He'd never ridden one before, so he had no idea what to expect.
"Not yet," Lucy corrected. "I told him I'm coming back to Magnolia after I get a restraining order and get some of my stuff. He said he wanted me to stay with him, but I told him I didn't want that. I also told him you'd probably be coming with me, but I didn't know when you had to be at work again, so he's holding off on buying them until I let him know."
"The earliest we can get there is Saturday, and I have to be at work Monday morning..." Natsu rolled his eyes up, thinking about their schedule. "That'd mean you'd only have about a day and a half before we had to come back."
"I think that's enough time. I don't want to get a lot of my stuff. Mainly some clothes and a picture of my mom. My car's there too, but I can leave it at my dad's house, unless..." She frowned, obviously troubled by something.
"What is it?" Natsu's hands were still at her waist, but not with a tight a grip.
She cringed, then shook her head. "I can't ask you to call out from work. I was going to say we can drive my car back, but we probably wouldn't make it back by Monday..."
As much as Natsu wanted to say calling out of work would be no problem, it really wasn't. He had people depending on him, and so far he'd never called out of work, even on his shittiest days. "I can't really miss work..."
"I understand," she smiled, showing that she meant it. "I can get it another time, or better yet, I can ask my father to sell it for me and he can send me the money."
"Are you sure you'd want to do that?" He cocked his head. He'd never seen her car before, since she got it after she left, but he couldn't imagine it'd be easy to just part with it.
"I'm sure. I didn't drive it a lot anyway. He..." Lucy gulped when she thought about her husband's temper. "He umm, didn't like it when I left the house without him."
"Say no more," Natsu curled his arms around her again, but this time in a defensive manner, as if someone might try to steal her away from him. "Truth be had, I have something I need to go to Sunday night... At seven..." He was unsure if he should confess that he's going to an AA meeting. 'Would she think less of me if I told her I had a problem?'
"Okay," Lucy didn't ask what he had going on, instead she said, "then we'll come back by plane."
Despite getting his way, Natsu groaned.
"It's not so bad," Lucy joked, noticing the slight blue tint over his nose. "It feels like you're riding an elevator... for a few hours."
Stomach bile rose in Natsu's throat at the thought. "I'll-Ommmph, I'll be right back." He retreated, heading for his bathroom to let himself throw up everything he ate that morning. He hated wasting Lucy's cooking like that, but the thought of riding something that feels like an elevator for hours killed his stomach.
Before leaving the bathroom, he pissed, washed his hands, shaved, then brushed his teeth. He felt a little more refreshed now, and only hoped the feeling would last a bit longer. It took a lot of effort to not think about the flying mode of transportation.
Instead of going to the kitchen, he headed to his bedroom. If they were going to Crocus, he needed a change of clothes at least. After he packed a small backpack, he walked into the living room to drop his bag by the front door.
Lucy was still in the kitchen, talking on her phone. "Yes... Soon... I'm pretty sure I have enough... Yes we're going straight there... Okay... Yes, by Sunday afternoon... Thank you... Bye father... Love you too." The blonde hung up the phone, then slipped it into her pocket.
"Everything okay?" Natsu asked, making his way to the sighing woman.
"Yeah, I'm just not looking forward to this drive. I told my father the plans, he's buying our tickets now." Lucy smiled when Natsu's warm hands snaked around her waist. "I was wondering if I could take a quick shower before we leave?"
Natsu smirked, his eyes gleaming with a devious glint. "Can I join you?"
Lucy's face flushed a bright red. "I-I, I guess," she'd never showered with someone before. It didn't sound very convenient, plus, Natsu would get a good look at every inch of her. "Just... try not to look, at my legs and stomach..."
"It'll be kinda hard not to," his arms gripped her under her butt, then lifted her into the air. She let out a shriek, but he just laughed. "It's hard not to look at your sexiness, but I'll try." With that, Natsu stumbled to his bathroom. He was sober this time, but Lucy was flailing about, throwing him off balance with every step.
It was worth it, since she started to laugh right as he entered the bathroom.
Natsu set her down, immediately going to the shower to start the water. "Hope you like it hot," he smiled at her, loving how embarrassed she got.
Feeling a lack of shame, the pink haired man stripped down to his boxers right in front of Lucy. When he was done, he hooked his thumbs on his waistband, "feeling shy are we?" It was a little light teasing, causing Lucy to sputter. She was still fully dressed, while he was already pulling down his last bit of clothing.
His hard cock sprung free, bouncing a little when the waistband snagged on the head. "Normally I'd say ladies first, but it'd probably be easier if I start, that way you can get naked in private."
Once again, she could only sputter.
Before getting in the shower, Natsu stepped up to her, giving her a long, sensual kiss. Just as she melted into his touches, he pulled away. "See you in there." And just like that, Lucy was left outside of the shower, debating what just happened.
Knowing Natsu wouldn't judge her as easily as other people, she started removing her clothes. First to come off was his shirt, then her shoes and socks. She struggled with her jeans. It wasn't that they were too tight to come off, it was that she was still worried that he might think less of her when he saw her scars again. He hadn't degraded her the first time, but he'd also been partially drunk. She had no idea how Natsu would react when sober.
Feeling the anxiety creep up, her eyes darted to the sink. As if sensing its presence, her eyes landed on a razor. She moved as if she didn't have a mind, she stepped up to the razor and picked it up. It was still wet, with extremely short pink hairs caught between the blades. She imagined the sensation of dragging that sharp edge against her skin. She never thought she'd want to cut herself after leaving her husband, but here she was, bringing the razor closer to her body.
Right before the blades touched the skin on her stomach, she heard Natsu holler, "you change your mind?"
"What?!" Lucy jolted, dropping the razor into the sink. "Shit," she hissed under her breath. 'How can I be so stupid. Why... Why did I even want to cut again. I'm not sad anymore, right? I'm leaving my husband, so my problems should go away too... I thought these feelings would just... vanish!'
Realizing a little too late, she thought, 'maybe my problems aren't going to go away that easily...'
The revelation was troubling.
Lucy picked the razor back up, then placed it where she found it. As soon as her hand went back to her side, she heard Natsu again, but this time louder. "Everything okay?"
She jerked her body, facing the shower. Natsu had his head of soapy pink hair sticking out from the curtain. "Luce?"
"I'm fine!" The blonde spoke way to loud and way too fast. She cursed her rapid heartbeat and the flush that coated her neck and chest. 'He didn't see, did he? Does he know what I was about to do?'
"...Okay..." Natsu rose a brow, but chose not to ask why she seemed so tense. "Are you joining me? The water feels great."
"I...umm..." She turned away, ashamed of her actions. How could she let Natsu love her, when she didn't even love herself.
"You don't have to," the pink haired man assured, catching her attention. His voice sounded apologetic. "Look, if I pressured you-"
"No!" Lucy couldn't shake her head fast enough. "It's not like that. I just..." She felt the prick behind her eyes, but she refused to let the tears form. 'Be honest with him. If he truly loves me, he'll understand...'
Taking a deep breath, she tried confessing, "I'm having... issues. And, and I-" She couldn't get it out. Even the knowledge that Natsu might understand wasn't enough to let her tell him the truth.
"Do you want to come in?" Natsu sounded unsure of himself, his goofy grin long gone. "I'm almost done..."
"I want to shower with you," Lucy admitted, relieved that her voice didn't crack. "Just, give me a minute to get undressed."
A small smile lifted the corners of his mouth. "Take your time." Natsu pulled back into the shower, letting the warm water wash over his hair. He already cleaned his body, so he was almost finished anyway.
'Maybe this is for the best,' he thought as the last bits of conditioner ran down the drain. Lucy probably wasn't ready for something like this, and it was wrong of him to suggest it so early on. Being honest with himself, he was hoping to get intimate with her again before the trip to Crocus. Hell, every few thoughts of his drifted back to the wild night they had together, and all the things he wanted to do with her. He was so caught up in the lewd visions that he hadn't noticed when another body entered the shower.
"Hey," Lucy's meek voice came from behind him.
He turned around, looking down at her with a gentle smile. "Hey." They locked eyes, staring for a few seconds. "I'm done, if you want the shower to yourself."
The blonde shook her head. "I was going to ask if you'd wash my back."
His eyes softened, glad that she wanted him around, "I'd be happy to."
Natsu stepped aside, letting Lucy take the stream of water. She worked on her hair first, then glanced around in confusion. "Can I use your stuff? That's the one thing I forgot to buy while I was out."
"Yeah," he said eagerly. The thought of Lucy smelling like him turned him on in a weird way. It was almost like marking her with his scent, but he decided not to let it get to his head. He grabbed a bottle of shampoo, happy that it wasn't too masculine, but also not girly.
She thanked him, then worked the liquid into her long locks. She shyly asked for his body wash, which he handed to her along with the sponge he used to clean himself with. It was his only one, so she'd have to share.
Lucy didn't mind. She got to work, scrubbing every inch of her body that she could reach. Natsu was oddly respectful, keeping his eyes on her face, even when she washed her breasts and private parts.
The blonde rinsed the shampoo out of her hair, then smiled when Natsu handed her a bottle of conditioner without being asked. Despite him not looking down at her body, she stole -what was supposed to be a quick- glance at his.
His tan, muscled torso was already drying since she hogged all the water. Beads of liquid dripped down every rigid ab as they made their way to his waist. She gulped when she saw his manhood. It stood erect, sprouting from a small bush of pink hair. More than anything, she wanted to grab it, touch it, lick-.
"Want me to get your back?"
Lucy's eyes snapped up. That devilish smirk on Natsu's face let her know she'd been caught staring at his cock. Her skin felt like it was on fire. To say she was embarrassed would be an understatement.
"I'm sorry!"
"No need to be," he said confidently. It made him proud that his body could reduce her to a drooling mess. And he said drooling because her lips had parted, and the smallest bit of saliva trickled from the corner of her mouth while her eyes were glued to his erection.
Lucy didn't say anything else on the matter. She was already caught, so there was no talking her way out of this one. After turning back to face the water, she rubbed the conditioner into her hair, praying he wouldn't tease her about her ogling.
She should've known better.
"Are you ready for my assistance?" Natsu asked, taking a step closer to her. His hardness pressed against her soft ass, causing her to gasp. "Here," he grabbed the soapy sponge from the shower caddy.
He pulled away, but only enough to allow him access to her back. The tip of his cock still touched her skin. Her shoulders were tense, but slowly went slack as he rubbed the sponge over her back in a soothing way. He didn't press too gentle, but he also didn't want to hurt her by going as rough as he did with himself.
He knew she already washed everywhere else, but he wanted to tease her a bit. The sponge drifted, until it brushed over her butt. When she didn't pull away, he kept going, rubbing it against her sensitive skin.
Natsu's hand wandered, running up her body and to the front. She said nothing as he washed her breasts again, making sure to pay extra attention on her hardening nipples. A moan tumbled from her lips, and he knew he had her.
"Can I wash you with my hands?" He asked, wanting to get permission before going any further. He desperately craved her body. He wanted to play with it, pleasure it, worship it!
Lucy nodded, then leaned back until she pressed against his chest. "Please," she begged, making his cock impossibly harder.
"With pleasure," he moaned as his hands squeezed the sponge until they were covered in soap. His hands went straight for her breasts, causing her to arch her back and press her butt harder against his cock. Still soapy, his cock slid into the crack of her ass where he began thrusting against her. "God, you're amazing Luce!"
His fingers found both nipples. She was so soapy that the little buds kept slipping from his grasp, but that only made him try that much more to pleasure her.
The air was steamy, making Natsu sweat despite being in the shower. He touched her all over, trying to show her how much he treasured her. He wanted her to know how much he loved and enjoyed her, because she was his everything.
Lucy began moving her body against his, letting the soap and water get their skin more slippery. When all the soap was cleaned from his cock, he whispered in a ragged breath, "can I take you again, please?"
"Yes!" Lucy's hand was between her legs, working on herself in unison with Natsu's thrusts.
"Good," he grunted, then grabbed her hips to shift her body to the wall, away from the shower head. "Place your hands on the wall," he instructed, watching her right hand reluctantly leave her core in favor of doing as she was told. "Now spread your legs."
She did, and his cock surged by how submissive she was. He could have a lot of fun with her, though sometimes he'd like it if she was disobedient or even dominant. He loved how powerful she was when they were growing up, so he could only imagine how that would affect her in bed.
Natsu rubbed his cock against her opening, getting it wet with her arousal since they were no longer under the shower's stream. He gripped her hips, jutting them out so she was at an angle. Slowly, he slipped himself in.
Once inside, he couldn't help himself from thrusting in and out of her core. She still felt incredible, so much so that his knees shook from the pleasure coursing through his veins. Last night he'd been inebriated, so lasting long wasn't an issue. Now, he didn't know if he could hold back.
Lucy's face was turned to the side, so he leaned in to give her an awkward kiss. He sucked on her bottom lip, scraping it a little with his teeth. As much as he wanted to go nice and easy, there was something about Lucy that made him want to ravish her.
He snapped his hips, causing her to whimper. "Natsu!" Her inner walls clamped around him, but it was just a reaction, she wasn't done yet, and neither was he.
One of Natsu's hands came up, cupping Lucy's hand that was on the wall, then intertwined his fingers with hers. He wanted to feel all of her, every single inch. She was amazing, she sounded fantastic, and his mind almost melted from the erotic sensations alone.
Never in a million years did he ever think he'd get the chance to have her, let alone twice in a row! He picked up the pace, grunting and groaning with every thrust. The kiss was heated, even if it strained their necks.
Natsu felt that familiar heat pooling in his lower body. The coil in his stomach was about to snap, but he couldn't come undone this quickly. He wanted a little more. "I. Love. You. Lucy!" He growled every time his cock entered her tightness. Even after loosening her up last night, she recovered quickly. She felt amazing, almost too amazing!
Knowing he might come soon, one of his hands wrapped around her, seeking out her clit. The moment he found it, he mercilessly rubbed the engorged nub. Lucy's body jerked, but she kept moaning, "yes, yes Nat-Naaaaaa-ahhhh, ohhh, right there, ngghh!"
He wasn't able to kiss her while she moaned so much, so he listened and enjoyed the satisfying sounds she made. He was sure to get a noise complaint, but he didn't give a shit. At the same time that he surged forward, Lucy fell back, making him hit deeper into her gushing core. He'd never felt a woman get so wet before, and he loved every second of it.
He rubbed her clit so vigorously, he was worried he might hurt her, but she never told him to stop. He felt her pussy quiver, nearing its end. "Fuck Luce! I don't think I can last much longer," he rammed into her harder, faster, loving the way her tits bounced with every rough thrust. He wanted to make her tumble over the edge first, so his hand on her hand dropped so he could pinch her nipple at the same time his teeth sunk into her shoulder.
"Naaatsuuuu," that was what it took to make her climax.
Her pussy wrapped tightly around his cock, giving him the satisfaction of making her come first. He wasn't far behind, panting out hot breaths as he drove his cock deeper into her warmth. "Lucy, Lucy, LUCY!" He called out her name with every thrust until he couldn't hold out anymore.
"Ghaaaaahhh," he growled as his cock spurt his hot seed into her body. Once again, he filled her up, loving every single tingle and jolt that took over his body afterwards. Every nerve was set on fire, but it was welcomed. Nothing could compare to this blissful heat.
He stayed inside her for a few extra seconds, making sure he emptied everything into her pussy. She was still shaking, so he wrapped both arms under her chest to keep her up.
Once he softened, he pulled out of her body. Lucy barely had time to recover before he was showering her with kisses. His lips touched everywhere he could reach, her shoulders, her neck, the side of her face. One kiss landed in her hair, but that caused him to jerk away. She hadn't had a chance to wash out the conditioner, leaving him with a bad taste in his mouth.
Lucy let out a tired giggle as he gargled some of the running water. Then she shrieked when he playfully squirted it at her, from his mouth! That seemed to give her enough strength to stand on her own.
The two laughed, hugged, then kissed. He never wanted to let her go, but sadly their shower had to end eventually.
Natsu stepped out first, feeling weary and drained. He had to walk across the hall to his closet to fetch two towels, not caring that his dick swung with every step. When he returned, Lucy was stepping out as well.
He handed her a nice fluffy white towel, then proceeded to dry himself. Once he was done, he glanced over at the blonde. She was brushing her hair with his comb, but he didn't mind. He enjoyed seeing her this comfortable around him. It pleased his aching heart.
When Lucy finished, she wrapped the towel around her body, then left briefly to grab her toothbrush. "May I?" She asked when she got back, holding up his toothpaste.
"Go ahead," he said with a smile. His body still felt blissful after the orgasm, even if it caused him to be a little sleepy. "I have to stop by the store across the street to get some medication for the trip. And probably some energy drinks too."
"Ohfay," Lucy mumbled with a toothbrush in her mouth. "I boph shacks."
"Huh?" Natsu rose a pink brow. As amusing as it was to listen to her try to talk, he couldn't understand her.
The blonde spit out a wad of foamy toothpaste. "I said I bought snacks. They're in one of the bags in the kitchen. I bought two of your favorite energy drinks... And those hot sauce flavored sunflower seeds you used to eat."
The pink haired man was stunned for a second. She was so sure he was coming with her to Crocus before she even asked. She placed that much trust and faith in him. He couldn't help but hug her, even if she was now brushing her teeth again.
"I love you, you're so amazing Luce. I want you to know that."
The blonde smiled with the toothbrush hanging out of her mouth. "I luph you tooph."
He just chucked, then kissed the middle of her exposed back. "Did you happen to buy any underwear on your little shopping trip?"
Lucy flushed, avoiding his gaze in the mirror. She nodded, feeling herself get embarrassed over the topic.
"Good," he smirked as he glanced down at her jeans. "I see you also borrowed a pair of my boxers."
Her eyes widened, mortified that she'd been caught. Her own panties had been so dirty after everything last night, that she couldn't bear to put them back on when she woke up. She was hoping she could get away with it, and wash the borrowed underwear before he found out.
"It's okay," he laughed, easing her tension. "I'd love to have you model them for me some day." With that, he left the sputtering girl alone in the bathroom to finish getting ready.
Lucy heard Natsu yelling from the other side of his apartment. "I'm gonna get changed and grab those pills. I'll be back really soon... Don't leave, okay?" The last part was strained, and she could imagine that it was an honest concern for him.
She spit out the liquid in her mouth, then yelled back, "I'll be here! I promise!"
"Awesome! I'm all fired up now!"
Not long after that, Lucy heard the front door close, and she sighed. This was just the beginning of the rest of their lives together. It was both thrilling, and scary. She just hoped she was everything Natsu wanted, because right now she still felt undesirable.
Lucy had a hunch that just like her urge to cut, this feeling wouldn't just go away on its own.
WOOT! This is so far the LONGEST chapter I've written for any of my stories! I'm so excited! Sorry it took so long to get this chapter out. I was tempted to cut it in half like I usually do, but I resisted the urge this time! Over 8,000 words? This took a lot out of me! Did you like how I threw another lemon in there? :P Okay, I'll stop rambling.
Thank you for all the support! I appreciate every fav/follow/review! Thank you to those who said something: Argo0, sidjr100, sthokatrina, Demonleonhart, westerngoddess, BobIsAwesome, katiekat2001, LovelyLovelyLove, Adtrboy0916, Guest, FlameDragonHime, CrystalDrago, Shin-Ah Warrior, DragonQ, Weirdblondi, Dark Mystique, Ashnmarley, Gigi-San28, Guest, Celestial War101, KittyCrow12, Crimsonlink310, sarara1.8, Kauia, HolyChihuahua, Abdltf, Rjtp, Anon, & Dark Shining Light!
Up next, Chapter Ten: Road trip.