Chapter 4 - Objection! (That Is So Much Fun To Say)
It was lunchtime at Midtown High School and pizza day to boot, with the students free to select stuffed crust, french bread, or pizza sticks with marinara sauce. While this is cause for celebration for anyone who isn't allergic to cheese, and many people who are but feel like rolling the dice anyway, there was one student-just one-sitting in the furthest corner of the cafeteria that couldn't be made happy by even that much.
"I can't believe this." Peter muttered sullenly as he pushed his lunch around his tray. "How could this have happened? I'm not even related to Norman, he's not even really dead, and I know nothing about running a company. Why would he leave his entire business to me?"
"Technically he didn't leave you his entire business." Liz tried to reassure him. "Just all of his shares, investments, authority as CEO-" She stopped short when she saw how frustrated he looked. "Yeah, I don't know how I thought that would cheer you up either." She apologized warmly before slowly eating her pizza sticks to avoid digging into his privacy any further.
"I don't see what the big deal is." Gali shrugged before stuffing a whole pizza stick completely marinated in marinara sauce in her mouth. "You've got a crazy amount of disposable income now, your family's money troubles are over. Aren't you happy that you don't have to worry about all those stupid bills anymore? Not to mention all the cool gadgets you could make for your extracurricular activities."
"That's easy for you to say." He sighed as he managed to bring himself to take a small bite of pizza. "After what he's done I can honestly say that I hate Norman Osborn, or Green Goblin, or whatever he wants to call himself now that he's fled the country. I don't want anything to do with anything of his."
"Technically it is yours now." Laura observed stoically as she surgically cut her french bread pizza into a 2x5 grid and began using her fork to dip it in a small portion of sauce Gali insisted she take. "As an alpha it should be in your best interest to claim assets, personnel, and territory from fallen rivals. Do you not wish to expand your area of influence and number of mates?"
"You know she does make a good point, Peter." Gwen admitted. "Not about the number of mates, but everything else. You're able to help a lot of people on your own, but just imagine how much more good you could do with an entire company behind you."
"A company made by Norman Osborn." Peter pointed out logically. "If the top of the pyramid is that crooked then who knows just how many other angles don't fit right, not to mention that owning a company just isn't me."
"Fear of betrayal from former enemies is a logical argument." Laura conceded. "However, with the number of powerful allies and mates already on your side, as well as your own gifted skill at strategy and precognitive senses, the amount of tactics any non-superhuman adversary could harm you with are extremely limited."
"It's both scary yet oddly reassuring how completely you've blended animal instinct with tactical thinking." Peter smiled slightly at the feral mutant. "By the way how are you adapting to being a regular student? I imagine it can't be an easy transition from your old line of work."
"I am acclimating." Laura assured him. "I have scouted another potential packmate that already bares your scent heavily, who also experiences a spike in mating hormones in your presence, and invited her to dine with us today."
"Laura, for the last time, I'm not looking for more girlfriends." Peter sighed wistfully. "I kinda have my hands full with the five I already have, so even though I'm glad you're trying to make friends in your own way, I think you might have an easier time approaching people if you didn't mention you're dating a polygamist. I doubt this girl you spoke to is even gonna show-"
*Spider-Sense!*-She's right behind you, genius!
"-up." He muttered mutely before turning around to see a familiar young redhead. "Mary Jane, I didn't see you there. How long have you been standing there?" He asked worriedly as he mentally reviewed their conversation for any possibly incriminating discussions.
"Long enough to know you're a lot better with the ladies than your aunt implied." Mary Jane answered in shock and awe. "Do you mind if I..."
"Oh, go right ahead." Peter chuckled nervously as he scooted aside to let MJ have some room to sit. "You'll have to forgive Laura, she's been home schooled in the mountains for most of her life because of her mom's work, so she isn't quite up to speed on societal norms yet."
"I can see that." She noted before turning to Liz. "I must say I'm surprised to see you here Liz. I thought that after that big break up you wouldn't want to be around Peter anymore, much less dating him again, and in these circumstances to boot."
"Yeah, it's funny what life throws your way sometimes." Liz gave her boyfriend a longing sideways glance. "But I really have to thank Gali for approaching us all with the idea in the first place. I wouldn't have my Petey back and so much more without her."
"'Sup?" Gali waved before she nonchalantly shoved a whole slice of french bread pizza in her mouth and swallowed it whole, much to MJ's amazement and partial disgust.
"How did you do that?" Mary Jane gasped in awe, which quickly turned into a mini-panic attack when she saw that Gali still had a huge pile of pizza stacked almost a foot high left on her tray. "And how much more do you plan to eat?!"
"I'm an eater." Gali shrugged before opening and draining a whole pint on chocolate milk in one gulp. "I'm on the professional circuit all the time. This is really just a light meal for me."
"Where do you even put it all?" MJ questioned as she noted that no one else at the table seemed at all phased by her inhuman eating habits.
"I don't exactly have what you might call a normal stomach." Gali remarked before bending over to clutch her stomach. "Ooh, but even so, there's something I ate a few weeks ago that really isn't agreeing with me." She winced sickly.
"You have indigestion?!" Gwen whispered in astonishment. "Is that even possible for you?"
"More to the point, is it possible to get indigestion from something you ate weeks ago?" Laura added her two cents. "If it were some form of intestinal parasite I could understand, though I do not understand why anyone would eat such things willingly."
"They're parasites alright." Gali muttered as she got a little green around the gills. "Heartless, gluttonous, no good, evil little parasitic-hrk!"
*Spider-Sense!*-She's gonna blow!
"Hit the dirt!" Peter and Gwen shouted in unison as they each pulled whoever was sitting next to them besides Gali and yanked them under the table.
"Listen Tiger, I know I said you were good with the ladies, but this is too much too-" MJ never got a chance to finish her sentence, as an incredibly long and loud belch reverberated throughout the cafeteria and most of the school, even shaking the table they were currently taking cover under. "Never mind... this is good... at least until the ringing stops." She amended mutely even as Peter helped her back up to her seat. "God, this is the last thing I need on a Monday."
"You guys don't think I drew too much attention just now, do you?" Gali grinned nervously as they looked around the cafeteria, seeing nothing but one incredibly stunned face staring at them after another. Suddenly Flash slowly began clapping and within moments the applause picked up speed as everyone in the cafeteria put down what they were doing and started clapping a whooping like there was no tomorrow.
"Pretty sure you couldn't draw more attention if you tried." Peter answered her, causing Gali to sink a little in her seat even as she quickly made a pizza sandwich with two French Bread Pizzas for bread, a rolled up stuffed crust and two pizza sticks for fixings, and a heaping amount of marinara sauce for condiments, which was actually so big she needed three whole bites and two pints of chocolate milk to get it all down.
"...So incredible gastrointestinal system aside what were you guys talking about before I got here?" Mary Jane asked as many students, mostly jocks, came by to congratulate Gali on her incredible stomach. "I mean I don't exactly know what sort of conversations that, uhh... people of your lifestyle usually have." She whispered to Peter, not wanting to offend anyone and knowing that he was too nice to ever really be insulted by almost anything.
"No different from typical lifestyles to be honest." Peter shrugged as the crowd around Gali began to disperse. "Right now we were just talking about how I inherited a multi-billion dollar industry in a will from a guy I can't stand who also isn't really dead." He deadpanned, getting the expected vacant stare in response. "Okay so it isn't exactly typical but this and that are completely unrelated to each other."
"Norman Osborn left his company to you?" She whispered in astonishment. "Why would he do something like that? I mean I know that a will would make his staged death look more convincing and all, but why leave it all to you instead of his wife or son? More to the point why is this even an issue? His death was faked, the police have proof, Harry is in juvie for using embezzled company funds to rush criminals through bail for more crimes, no offense." She apologized briefly, Peter signaling for her to continue. "Anyway, my point is that whatever will he left when he ran off should be pointless, because any assets he had should be frozen or seized by the police in the wake of all this bad press and criminal activity."
"Wait a second..." Gwen hummed thoughtfully as the pieces of the puzzle began to fall into place. "MJ might be onto something there. With all the dirty dealings by both Norman and Harry the police and FBI should be foreclosing on the bulk of the Osborn Family's assets, at least the ones that can be traced back to criminal activity, but I haven't seen anything about that in the papers."
"And your father did not mention anything either?" Laura investigated clinically, getting a negative response from Gwen. "How odd. Given your attachment to the situation you would think he would give at least some indication of knowing something."
"Maybe there's nothing to know?" Liz shrugged in confusion. "Maybe OsCorp is just cutting the Osborns loose and clamming up to avoid any more trouble, they've clearly got more than enough of it on their plate already." Calmly continuing her meal would have to wait for her however, as she was perturbed by the many stares her friends and boyfriend were giving her. "What? Is there something on my face?"
"More like something you said." Peter grinned with new insight. "Think about it, between Osborn Sr. and Osborn Jr. there's just way too much dirty laundry hanging out to dry for OsCorp to take any chances. Whatever's left of Osborn's inner circle is probably on pins and needles, spending tons of time and money just to stay afloat and out of jail. OsCorp needs some way to take some of the heat off, and putting someone new and previously unaffiliated with the company in charge could be just the ticket. Norman's will probably just provided them with barely enough leverage and precedent to hand the company over to me."
"But that still doesn't answer why you were in the will." MJ reminded them. "I mean I know you used to be friends with... you know." She tried to dance around the subject delicately. "But that doesn't strike me as reason enough to leave everything to you instead of his own family."
"I don't think I was his first choice." He assured her. 'At least I hope not.' His more cynical side felt the need to add. "Most likely I was just a backup in case something happened to..."
"Petey, it's cute how modest you are, but you need to know your limits." Liz scolded him delicately. "It's no big secret that Norman was a coldblooded, perfectionist monster who never thought very highly of his son. He always though Peter would have made a superior son, and constantly pushed Harry to try and measure up to the impossibly high standards Peter set just by being himself."
"Liz!" Peter gasped, aghast by her words.
"Petey, you're an amazing guy, spectacular even, and you don't let it go to your head." Liz chastised him. "But you don't let yourself feel confident no matter how much you deserve it either. I know you're worried it'll go to your head and lead to disaster, but is it so hard to believe that you're more than you think you are?"
"It's complicated." Peter sighed in frustration. "You just don't-"
"-Understand?" MJ finished for him. "Tiger, I can't believe I'm saying this, but you need to listen to your girlfriends on this. I've seen your grades, I've seen how compassionate you are, and Liz is right. You are amazing, you are spectacular, but that doesn't mean you need to be superior, and you shouldn't for that matter, because that's not who you are."
"Come again?" He questioned in confusion.
"Peter, you're a brilliant man, but you're also kind and responsible to a fault, which is sadly a very rare combination." Mary Jane consoled him. "I don't know why you insist on selling yourself short, but you have so much potential, so much you could offer to the world. So what if you only inherited OsCorp through dirty politics? What matters is what you do with it now that you have it. You could just sit around and sulk like some emo figurehead, pretending to be something you aren't and letting those old big wigs run things the way they want like they no doubt intend to, or you can grab life by the horns and do something amazing with it."
"But what if it goes to my head?" Peter countered weakly, clearly running out of excuses. "What if all that power gives me a crazy superiority complex someday? It happened to two generations of Osborns after all."
"But you're not an Osborn, and you're not superior." Mary Jane assured him as she gripped his hand in one hand and his shoulder in the other, doing her best to reassure him. "You're not about competition, you're about just doing what you think is right. And besides, even if you do start to get out of hand, you've got a bunch of girlfriends to bring you back down to earth; keeping our men from getting swelled heads is part of a woman's job after all." She teased him playfully. The two just sat there in silence for several seconds, just staring at each other as if all other problems in the world had vanished, if only for a moment.
"...Are you two having a moment?" Gwen snickered playfully, causing the two to immediately separate in a flustered panic. "It's okay if you are, we are kinda aiming for it."
"...Are you all seriously on board with this idea?" MJ asked, getting unanimous nods from all the girls. "And you're not?" She turned to Peter, who could only quietly scratch the back of his head. "Weird, you'd think it would be the other way around."
"Gali just has this way with people." Was the only defense Peter could muster. "She doesn't let anyone talk down to her, she doesn't get embarrassed about anything, and she doesn't really care what other people think of her so long as she gets her way. It's both what I like most and fear most about her. Speaking of which where is she anyway?" He glanced around as he noticed she wasn't at their table anymore.
It didn't take them more than a few seconds to find her. After all, how many people in the cafeteria were chugging pizza sticks coated in marinara sauce like a hot dog eating contest while surrounded by a crowd of chanting spectators?
"I don't know what's more surprising; that we didn't notice that until just now, or that I didn't see this coming in the first place." Peter chuckled giddily, glad to have something to break the tension.
Later That Day - OsCorp
We join Mary Jane, Liz and Felicia as they sit in a waiting room, each one of them anxiously waiting outside an increasingly ominous looking pair of double doors for their mutual love interest to emerge after having entered over half an hour ago.
"So how exactly do you know Peter again?" Mary Jane asked Felicia, tired of the tense silence and looking to make conversation.
"We swing in similar circles." Felicia shrugged evasively. "We ended up seeing so much of each other over time that getting together just seemed natural."
"Really?" Mary Jane remarked skeptically as she subtly eyed Felicia's voluptuous figure, wondering how such an unbelievable bombshell wound up with a polygamist, albeit a very nice one.
"Your eyes say that you doubt my story." Felicia cooed playfully as she bent over just enough to give MJ an eyeful of her deep cleavage, sending the younger teen into a blushing fit as she tried and failed to avert her gaze.
"Can you really blame her?" Liz inquired teasingly. "A girl like you could have any guy you want, and yet you choose Petey. You really can't blame her for doubting the idea, anyone would question it at a glance to be honest."
"Anyone but Peter that is." Felicia sighed dreamily, but with a twinge of something MJ couldn't quite place.
"Are you saying he should have doubted it?" MJ eyed her suspiciously, causing Felicia to shift nervously in her seat.
"...Probably, at least in the beginning anyway." Felicia sighed guiltily as she leaned back in her chair. "I originally tried to seduce him to get something out of him but when it didn't work like I hoped it would he got pretty angry, almost ruined everything we had forever." She sighed again as she shifted in her seat. "It wasn't until after a stern talking to that I realized how empty I felt without him and how much I wronged him by trying to take advantage of him."
"So you're with him out of guilt?" Mary Jane frowned bitterly. "That doesn't sound like something a healthy relationship should be built on, much less one as complicated as yours."
"The guilt may have brought me back but Peter's moral compass was what made me stay." Felicia corrected her. "Being with him makes me a better person and I don't want to lose that ever again. I'd much rather be part of Club Parker than not."
Before MJ could press her any further Peter walked through the double doors with a slouch in his stride and a man in a suit with a cane by his side.
"Hey there Petey." Liz greeted him with a hug she could tell he desperately needed. "Was it rough in there?"
"No more than we expected." He sighed as the group made there way out of the waiting room and down the hall. "Everything was more or less like we predicted at lunch. They want me to be the figurehead for the company while they focus on regaining the ground they lost in the wake of Osborn going over the fence."
"Technically they phrased it in a more roundabout and flattering way." The cane wielding man remarked. "But when you take away all the bells, whistles and fancy string, your way of putting it is much more succinct."
"Thanks again for coming along with me today Mr. Murdock." Peter told the man appreciatively. "Given that Norman faked his death you really didn't have to go out of your way to help me out in that meeting."
"These are very unusual times we live in Mr. Parker-thank you." The blind man nodded gratefully as Peter stopped him at the elevator. "Mr. Osborn may have had nothing but ill intention when he had me help him write up his will, but even with all the extenuating circumstances I am still a lawyer and must represent and uphold the law to the fullest of my ability."
"I wish more lawyers were like you Matt." Felicia remarked as they entered the elevator and hit the ground floor button. "I've been in this office for less than an hour and I already scoped out more crooked businessmen than I've seen in the last year. So tell me, off the record, is there anything you wanna say on the matter?"
"Can't argue with you there Ms. Hardy." Matt Murdock sighed distastefully. "I'm not really supposed to say this, and if you tell anyone I said it I'll have to deny it, but even a blind man like me can see that this company has only three types of employees; the blissfully ignorant, the rightly intimidated, and the power-hungry crooks."
"I'm guessing those guys in the meeting today are third type." Peter remarked blithely.
"Absolutely." Mr. Murdock nodded. "Thankfully they're in the minority, the upper one percent if you will. I guess Osborn liked to surround himself with like-minded allies."
"Is there anything I could do about them?" Peter asked hopefully.
Matt turned his head in the general direction of Peter curiously. "I'd advise against it young man. These types of people can drive people who cross them to ruin in more ways than one. A kid your age is best off just keeping his head down and letting the adults sort these things out among themselves."
"Listen to the man Tiger." MJ urged Peter. "I know you have a rock solid moral code, but this sounds dangerous."
"I really wanna do something about all this though." Peter tensed his face in concentration. "Norman did a lot of awful things to a lot of people, and some of the people in there might have had something to do with it. I don't really care about the money or the power, I just want to make sure that justice is done, and every crooked decision this company ever made is brought to light."
"Peter..." MJ gasped silently in admiration of the young Spider as her heart skipped a beat.
Meanwhile, during his entire rapport with the girls, Matt Murdock, aka Daredevil; The Man Without Fear, was paying close attention to the heart rate and body language of Peter. From what he observed the young man had absolutely no fear of the people he wanted to face justice, nor any doubt of his ability to survive and even thrive against anything they could throw at him, and it didn't feel the least bit like bravado and empty confidence. He also wasn't naive, he knew that OsCorp has a known history of employing super villains, and he still didn't back down. More than that however was the fierce determination to do right in his voice. Like a razor sharp blade hidden underneath a thin veil, Matt could tell that there was much more to this young man than meets the eye, pun not intended.
"Tell you what kid," Matt remarked to Peter. "You've impressed me so I'm gonna do you a favor. Take this," He said as he held out a business card. "That's the number of a law office I know that might be able to help you out. Since it would be a conflict of interests for me to assist you directly, you can just tell the people at that office that Matt Murdock introduced you, and they should be able to help you out."
"Woah, thank you Mr. Murdock." Peter smiled brightly as he took the card. "Are you sure that they'd be willing to take the risk though? It could get pretty harry."
"Those two are used to risk." Matt brushed his concerns aside as the doors opened to the ground floor. "And something tells me you are too." He smiled as he exited the elevator.
"What was that all about Tiger?" MJ inquired curiously as the rest of the group exited the elevator.
"Who cares?" Felicia purred as she latched onto Peter's arm, making certain that her bosom was pressing into his arm. "I just love it when you get all confident and assured."
"You can say that again." Liz smiled at her boyfriend. "What about you Mary Jane? Does it give you any ideas?"
MJ's face turned a vivid red, but she opted not to respond, focusing instead on the card in Peter's hand. "So who did Mr. Murdock introduce you to? Must be some pretty determined lawyers to be willing to take a case like this."
Peter jumped slightly, so excited to just be given help with no strings attached for once that he hadn't really looked at the card yet. "Let me see, apparently the place is called-"
Later That Day - At Another Office Building
"Welcome to Walters & Whedon Law Firm." A seven foot tall, amazonian, green-skinned, long green-haired woman in a business suit and skirt greeted the dazed quartet that just walked into her office. "My name is Jennifer Walters, and this is my associate Evangeline Whedon." She gestured to a petite woman with a black bob cut in subtle gothic attire. "How can we be of service to you four today?" After a long silence the smaller woman stepped in.
"I think you broke their pubescent minds, Jenn." Ms. Whedon snarked impishly. "This is why I keep telling you not to 'Hulk Out' during work hours."
"And as I keep countering, my stature gives me greater courtroom presence." Ms. Walters replied smoothly.
"You're big." Felicia gawked in awe.
"I could say the same about you." Ms. Walters noted about the voluptuous young platinum blonde. "But enough about that, I believe my colleague Mr. Murdock sent you to me for a reason?"
"Right." Peter shook the starstruck lust from his head. "I recently came into a good deal of surprising inheritance that I don't really want much to do with, but also don't want falling into the wrong hands."
"Define the 'Inheritance' and the 'Wrong Hands' if you could, Mr. Parker." Ms. Whedon addressed him evenly. "There are a lot of ways this could go depending on your answer."
And so the four teens explained their case to the pair of super lawyers, occasionally peppering in small details and tidbits at the request of their legal consultants. Within an hour they had explained everything they needed to know.
"I must say this is quite a story you've spun for us." Ms. Walters hummed as she thoughtfully reviewed her notes. "You were right to come to us, most lawyers aren't prepared to deal with the kind of friction this case may cause."
"Are you saying that this might involve... super villains, Ms. Walters?" Mary Jane uttered nervously.
"Where would you possibly get a crazy idea like that?" Ms. Whedon remarked drolly even as she not-so-subtly jerked her head at her super heroine coworker.
"Don't worry about a thing Ms. Watson, my partner and I have everything under control." Ms. Walters assured her. "Though I would be on my toes if I were you Mr. Parker, this is a dangerous game for a kid your age to be playing after all." She cautioned her client.
"My Petey is no stranger to danger." Liz remarked proudly as she squeezed her boyfriend. "You wouldn't believe the risks he's taken to get photographic evidence of some major crimes."
"Hang on a second." Ms. Whedon hummed curiously as she pulled out her phone and typed in a few things. "You wouldn't happen to be the same Peter Parker known for taking pictures of Spider-Man, would you?"
"That's me." Peter nodded. "Why do you ask?"
"Because Spider-Man has been targeting the operations of some of the biggest players in the criminal underworld as of late." Ms. Whedon pulled up some pics of Spider-Man and some of his amazing friends taking down a warehouse full of Tombstone goons. "This last weekend alone he and some of his mysterious new allies managed to take down no less than five safe houses full of illegal goods, at least three of which are suspected to be linked to known criminal Tombstone, and you're the guy who's been photographing most of it." She regarded him suspiciously, forcing him to try and think up a quick lie.
"Mysterious allies?" Liz pouted as she examined the image on the small screen, focusing on her literally frying the pants off of one guy with no small amount of amusement. "How are they mysterious? They've told the media who they are, or at least their superhero names anyway, and you got this article from The Bugle, didn't you?!" She glared as she noticed the headline of 'Spider-Man and his Menacing Friends!' with disdain. "What right does that pompous old fool Jameson have to slander good people like that?! People should be more suspicious of him than Spider-Man! I mean who else but a villain would wear a Hitler-stache after what happened in WWII?! Have none of these people ever read a history book?!"
"Easy there Liz." MJ chided her gently as she pulled her back to her seat. "Cool your jets for a second will ya? I never knew you were such a big Spider-Man fan."
"A passionate young woman, isn't she?" Jenn regarded Liz with some amusement and mirth. "By the way, off the record here, just out of curiosity, exactly what relation do you three have with my new client here?"
"We're his lovers." Felicia remarked nonchalantly, getting aghast looks from MJ and Peter. "What? We love who we love, it's not like there's any shame in it."
"Like those sitcoms about the Mormons, or are they reality shows. I can never tell." Ms. Whedon noted curiously.
"We're not like that." MJ insisted nervously. "Well I'm not anyway, I'm just here as a supportive friend since one of his other girlfriends who happens to be my friend as well is grounded for something she won't talk about, and-"
"Easy there Ms. Watson." Jennifer chuckled at the floundering young girl. "It's not our place to judge your lifestyle, unless you're a criminal, in which case it's entirely our place to judge you. You don't think it's a crime to love someone, do you?"
"Of course it's not." Peter cut in. "Who we choose to love is nobody's business but our own. Even if it is unconventional the heart wants what the heart wants, and who's to say what's forbidden in love anyway? People have been so confused on how love works for so long and had so many different ideas of what love is that it's impossible to tell if any kind of relationship is 'right' or not."
"Spoken like a true spin doctor." Ms. Whedon observed. "Keep it up and you'll be making millions a year off your new company before you know it, and when that happens I hope you'll remember all the little and hot so little people who helped you get there." She subtly plugged some advertising for their continued legal services.
"Thanks, but like I said before, running a company just isn't me." Peter assured them. "I just wanna make sure nothing like the Green Goblin ever happens again. So many lives were ruined because of Norman, and I just don't want to see that dirty money used for more dirty dealings."
"Then what do you want the money to be used for?" Jenn questioned him sternly, causing him to look at her strangely. "Listen kid, right now you're just hiring me to help clean out the scum from OsCorp, and my partner and I will do that to the best of our abilities, but what do you plan to do next? Will you sell the company? Will you let this inheritance just sit in a vault collecting dust until you die? What about the honest people who work at OsCorp, will you just leave this all for them to sort out and hope that someone worse than Mr. Osborn doesn't somehow manage to worm their way into power?"
"Ms. Walters, don't you think you're being too hard on Peter?" MJ asked her as she noticed how frustrated and depressed she was making him.
"I'm not being any harder on him than he's being on himself." Jenn sighed tiredly as she took note of just how much sorrow was hidden in Peter's eyes, so deep that she could barely even scrape the surface. "Listen kid, I'm sorry if this is hard on you, but you need to realize that the weight of the world isn't on your shoulders. I don't know what happened in your past to make you have such low confidence in yourself, but I can tell you have so much untapped potential, and that if you just let yourself you'd find that you can do so much more with your life than whatever you're doing now."
"That's what we've been saying this whole time Peter." Liz smiled warmly at him. "You're always selling yourself short and trying to do things the hard way just because it's harder, but you shouldn't be punishing yourself like this, it's just not healthy."
"She's right, babe." Felicia kissed him on the cheek. "Your awkwardness is cute, but your guilt complex needs to go. So you made a mistake once and it cost you, big deal. I've made worse mistakes than you have, and yet you still love me, so why can't you love yourself?"
"I may not fully understand what's going on here, but even I can tell you need help, Tiger." MJ added her two cents. "Now listen up and listen good Peter, because I'm only gonna say this once. You are, without a doubt, the nicest, most compassionate, loving, and forgiving person I have ever met. You try to somehow see the good in everyone, even the biggest jerks in school, yet you don't seem to be able to share any of that rose tinted view with yourself. I don't know why you feel the need to hurt yourself, but it ends right here, right now." She glanced over at the two lawyers, who were both tearing up at the dramatic sight. "Do you two mind?" She asked politely.
"Not at all." Evangeline sniffed as she and her partner made no effort to give them some privacy. "Don't stop on our account.
'I don't think that's what she was getting at.' Peter thought morosely. "Listen MJ, if it's alright wi-mmph?!" He was cut short as Mary Jane began passionately making out with him. His instincts taking over, Peter began to retaliate with his own skills built up by a combination of much recent experience and accumulated Tantric Energy, quickly overpowering and countering her assault with a fiercely passionate 18-Hit Combo before they both needed to come up for air.
"...Wow!" Mary Jane panted in ecstasy shortly after they parted, both her and Peter staring longingly at each other. "Face it Tiger, we both just hit the jackpot."
"Don't you just love happy endings?" Eva whispered to Jenn.
"Who said this was the ending?" Jenn whispered back. "By my count we're just getting started."
Meanwhile - Undisclosed Location
"The Parker kid is turning out to be more trouble than we thought." A man seated in a shadowed room addressed another man sitting across from him. "I thought you said he was emotionally frail, that he was vulnerable, that he would be a pushover, that's why we decided to push so hard for the will to be enacted in spite of the circumstances."
"He was supposed to be." The other man insisted with a bitter frown. "It's barely been a year since his uncle was killed, his aunt was hospitalized for a heart attack a few months ago, his girlfriend left him recently, and his best friend was sent to juvenile hall for serious crimes just two weeks ago, his social life was never good to begin with and just got worse and worse once his uncle died. By all accounts he should be an emotional wreck barely able to function."
"Well clearly the people we had investigate his background must have missed something, because emotional wrecks don't go to the one lawyer in the city with nothing to fear from any criminal with the intent to ruin us!" The first man hissed. "We have to do something before he manages to track down enough evidence to put us away for life! Because teenager or not, his IQ is still far and away higher than either of us, which means he will find something eventually!"
"We can start by deleting all incriminating evidence that could link us to anything." The second man suggested. "He may be able to recover some data, but it should at least buy us a few days to think of something else, and we can backup anything we need on external drives and hide them where no one will find them."
The Next Day - OsCorp CEO Office
"I gotta admit Peter, your computer skills are second to none." Jennifer admired him as he typed away on Norman's old computer, locating one important and potentially damaging file after another. "Do you think you can make a few improvements to my office computer sometime? It's been running pretty slow lately."
"That's why I keep telling you to lay off the internet porn, Jenn." Evangeline sighed despondently. "That stuff is a minefield of viruses and malware."
"Internet porn, seriously?" Felicia stared at Jenn judgmentally. "Know any good sites for furries?" She whispered to her on the side.
"I heard that, and I'm cutting your computer privileges." Peter scolded his feline fetishist girlfriend playfully. "Anyway, I'm just about done getting all of the suspicious looking data off of the server, mostly just recovered data that was recently deleted, but there are a few other interesting things I copied too. It'll take a day or two to go over completely, but with this we can hopefully clean out all the gunk in this company." He clicked and dragged one last large file to a window attached to a flash drive before ejecting the drive.
"You sure you've got everything on this?" Jenn asked in amazement. "There might be some things stored away on private servers."
"Pretty sure I got everything." Peter remarked confidently. "I'm always very thorough in my work." He grinned as the curious blue gem pendant he was wearing glowed in an eerie light.
Meanwhile - Undisclosed Location
"How did he get all those files so quickly?!" A man hissed in barely contained fury as he slammed his fist on a table. "I thought you said deleting all those files would buy us at least a few days, but these records show that he managed to recall all the deleted files in MINUTES!"
"I just don't understand it!" Panicked a second man as he frantically read through the printouts he'd been handed. "According to this data he not only recovered all the data we deleted from the servers, but he also copied all the less incriminating but still shady data we didn't delete, and he didn't take even one file that wasn't incriminating of something or someone!"
"Apparently he's far more resourceful than we anticipated." The first man scowled as he walked over to a nearby desk and began rummaging through the drawers. "We're gonna need to call in a ringer."
"He's more than just resourceful." The second man muttered in awe and confusion. "According to this he even managed to get the most dangerous data that was sealed away in Norman's old private study. That information was never even connected to our server and he accessed it all from Norman's office computer! That's not resourceful, that outright technologically impossible!"
"I don't care how he did it, all I care is how we can put his head on the chopping block before he puts ours on it!" The first man growled as he pulled a cell phone out of the drawer. "I've been saving this burner for a rainy day." He grinned viciously as he began dialing.
"Are you sure you wanna do this?" The second man asked fearfully. "He's got the She-Hulk on his side, and if we're found out-"
"We won't be!" The first man said adamantly as the phone began ringing. "I've been in this game too long and fought too hard to be taken down by some punk kid who doesn't know his place!"
"Hello?" A mechanically distorted voice came over the phone.
"I have some people I need you to get me for a job." The first man spoke quickly but clearly. "Time is a factor, and one which we have in short supply at that."
"Time is only a factor if money isn't." The voice remarked, and even distorted and over the phone the first man could hear the greed in it.
"Name your price, but you better get these two out by this time tomorrow." The first man relented without debating as he began explaining who and what he needed. The money he was using wasn't even his to begin with, it was all embezzled from a few private stashes of Norman's that the police hadn't found and seized yet. When he was done he wasted no time in throwing his phone in a metal trash bin along with some crumpled paper and lighting it on fire, disposing of the evidence.
Two Days Later - Luigi's Pizza
"Okay, this is officially the best pizza ever." Jennifer grinned as she savored the last slice of the large, deep dish, supreme pizza with extra cheese she'd ordered. "You sure you don't mind footing the bill? I know I eat a lot more than most." She asked Peter.
"Hey, you're risking your safety to help me clean up this city and for the first time in my life I have cash to burn, so I'm gonna enjoy it while it lasts." Peter smiled before washing down his pizza with some root beer. "This was always my favorite restaurant growing up, and the quality has only gotten better with time."
"Why do you still seem so dead set on giving all of this up?" Mary Jane asked worriedly. "Most people would kill to be in your position. I mean, life pretty much just gave you a winning ticket to the lottery and you don't seem at all interested in cashing in."
"The Omega makes a valid point." Laura agreed before pausing for her beer, which none of them had any idea how she got. "As we have instructed you before, Alpha, we insist that you utilize the new assets you have acquired for the betterment of your state of being."
"You guys just don't understand." Peter sighed, holding up a hand to cut off the girls before they could counter his train of thought. "Seriously, this money isn't even really mine, I didn't do anything to earn it. Even if I can ignore the fact that it's dirty, I can't ignore the guilt I feel taking something that isn't mine."
"Your argument would hold more weight if you hadn't stolen my virginity last night." Liz smiled warmly at him, bringing a vivid blush to his face as the girls sitting around him began laughing.
"Noted." Peter pouted defensively, but he couldn't stay upset for long and join in their mirth.
"Hey, who are you calling an Omega?" MJ frowned at Laura curiously.
Laura just stared at MJ for several seconds before she responded. "If you knew who the Alpha and Beta Females were, you would not be questioning your position as an Omega." Was all she said on the topic.
"It never gets old." Evangeline remarked in amusement as she watched the banter. "Six girlfriends to one guy and yet you all get along like sisters. I don't care what you say, this cannot be natural. What's your secret anyway?" She observed them curiously.
"Mind blowing sex." Felicia answered easily, rendering Peter and MJ aghast at her frankness. "The fact that Petey is inhumanly sweet and sensitive to our feelings certainly helps too."
"It's really that good?" Jenn questioned a little too eagerly for Peter's liking, getting unanimous nods of approval from Gwen, Liz, Felicia, Gali, and Laura. "You're a bit young now but... give it a few years. If you're still as good as these girls say you are by then or, heaven forbid, even better, make sure to look me up again."
"Good God Jenn, he's still in high school." Eva rolled her eyes as if this were a regular occurrence. "Do I need to call Chris Hansen on you?"
"I'm a lawyer, I know what my limits are." Jenn shoved her partner; playfully, as evidenced by the fact that she hadn't been sent flying. Suddenly Jenn began looking around as if investigating. "Do any of you hear anything?" She asked seriously.
*Spider-Sense!*-Incoming party crashers!
"Everybody down!" Peter and Gwen panicked in unison as they pulled everyone but Jenn under the table just as two huge figures crashed through the front wall.
"Well, well, well, look at what we have here." A towering blonde amazon in a purple outfit remarked as she cracked her knuckles with glee. "Been a long time since we last tangoed Shulkie. You been doing well?"
"Titania, what an unpleasant surprise." Jenn frowned as she casually removed her suit, revealing a purple and white sports bra and gym shorts underneath. "I see you traded in the Absorbing Man for someone..." She glanced over at the Rhino, who was standing right next to her. "Dumber looking." She smirked at the now snorting man as she kicked off her heels and started lacing up some purple sneakers.
"Carl and I are doing just fine, thank you very much!" Titania retorted viciously. "For your information we've actually been giving serious discussion to leaving the country and settling down somewhere nice to start a family!"
"You're married?!" The Rhino blinked in shock, causing her to glare at him angrily. "I mean don't get me wrong, it ain't all that surprising that a catch like you is already settled, but why didn't ya tell me that sooner instead 'a punching me in the face every time I tried to make a pass at ya? I'm a thug with a thing for tough dames, not a creeper. I woulda stopped if I knew you was spoken fer."
"I was having too much fun punching you." Titania grinned as she advanced on She-Hulk. "Don't think this is gonna go down the same way it did before She-Hulk. While you've been hitting the books, I've been hitting the gym." With that said she launched into a vicious attack against the Gammazon.
"You ladies is crazy." Rhino muttered as he scanned around the restaurant and found the non-gamma fueled members of the group trying to sneak past on the floor. "Hey there, Parker." He grinned as he approached the undisguised webslinger. "Don't think I've forgotten about all those photos of Spider-Man you've taken." He remarked as he held the teen up to eye level by the scruff of his shirt. "Now are ya gonna tell me nicely where I can find that stupid wall crawler or do I have ta persuade ya?" Just as the towering lunkhead looked to have the advantage something passed in front of his eyes and fell to the ground with a thud. "What the-?" He looked down and saw a familiar pointed object on the ground. "My horn!" He panicked as he dropped everything to feel his head for confirmation, his eyes going even wider in shock when he found nothing but a cleanly cut stump where his horn used to be. "Who did this-GAH!?" He shouted in a rage before being cut off by his face spontaneously being engulfed in flames. It took him only moments to pat out the flames, but moments were all the group needed to make their getaway from the fight.
Outside
"We have to get out of here!" MJ panicked as they all ran from the fight. "We can probably lose them if we go into the subway."
"Maybe you guys can, but keep in mind he's after me." Peter reminded her grimly. "You all need to get somewhere safe, I'll stay up here to keep him distracted."
"Are you crazy, kid?!" Eva demanded as she stopped in her tracks. "There's safety in numbers, and there's no way Jenn would let me live it down if I let you go off on your own like-" She stopped when MJ shook her shoulder. "What is it?" She demanded urgently.
"All the others have already run off!" MJ pointed out to her, Eva herself barely managing to catch the sight of all the other girls rushing down into a nearby subway entrance.
"What?! The nerve of those-" Eva trailed off bitterly as her attention was drawn back to Peter, who was now being tailed by MJ. "Peter! Mary Jane! What is wrong with these kids today?!" She huffed in frustration as she tried to follow after them, only to stop short when Rhino burst out into the street, followed shortly by She-Hulk, who looked like she'd been knocked for a loop, and then a savagely grinning Titania. "Not good." Eva muttered nervously as the villainous duo advanced on her.
Meanwhile in the alley, Peter had just finished changing into his Spider-Man uniform and flipped up the walls to the rooftop, unaware that Mary Jane had arrived looking for her boyfriend just as he began bounding up the walls.
"Spider-Man..." MJ murmured in awe as she watched the wall crawler bound onto the rooftop. "Peter..." She whispered suspiciously as the pieces began falling into place.
"Alright Shulkie, not that I don't love our little play dates, but I'm on the clock right now." Titania grinned as she pulled She-Hulk to her feet by her hair. "Now there are some people willing to pay big money for Spider-Man's head, and your client Parker is the only lead we've got. So why don't you play nice before we have to-HEY!" She startled when she was suddenly blinded by web in her face.
"He's here." Rhino grinned as he cracked his knuckles.
"Okay, do you ladies have any idea just how many Bro Code violations I'm making right now by getting involved?" Spider-Man quipped as he pounced down from the rooftops to kick Titania in the face just as she got the web off. "Seriously; Stopping a catfight, not selling tickets to a catfight, not inviting all my friends to a catfight. Okay, in all fairness, I don't really have that many guy friends to invite, or really any besides The Punisher and maybe Deadpool for that matter, but my point still stands." He scooped up She-Hulk bridal style and with some difficulty managed to jump back several feet from the epicenter of the fight. "I'll have you know I could seriously lose my membership over this!"
"I hear ya man, to be honest I was mostly just watching and keeping an eye on the hostage 'til you showed up." Rhino actually couldn't help but agree with his usual enemy, even Eva, who was currently trapped in his oversized meaty hands nodded in agreement. "Wait a sec, you're buds with The Punisher?!" Rhino panicked at the thought of angering the infamous Frank Castle by attacking Spider-Man, and began to seriously reevaluate his lifestyle choices.
"See! Even the guy who usually wants to impale me with his face gets it!" Spidey remarked as he set She-Hulk on her feet. "Speaking of which, did you get a haircut, or am I just getting taller?"
His remark about the loss of his horn enraging him, he threw Eva and his fear of retribution from The Punisher to the sidelines and charged at Spider-Man, only to stop several feet in front of him when She-Hulk intercepted.
"Holy Humongous!" Spider-Man gawked as She-Hulk effortlessly lifted Rhino over her head and slammed him face first into the pavement. "That may be the single hottest thing I've seen... today." He stared starry-eyed as he really began to notice and appreciate just how stacked and shredded She-Hulk was for the first time.
*Spider-Sense!*-Incoming supermodel!
"Oh jeez!" Spider-Man spooked as he lifted She-Hulk again and jumped over Titania before drop kicking her on the back. "We have got to stop meeting like this, babe." He joked to Jenn. "Or not, I'm fine either way, preferably the second option."
"You sure know how to show a gal a good tiIIIIIMMMMEEE!" She yelped as Titania jumped back to her feet, launching Spidey and Shulkie off and flying for several meters. Feeling like showing off, Spider-Man did a few flips before he landed square on his feet. "Woah. Strong, agile, funny, and impeccable timing; where have you been all my life?" Jenn smiled at Spidey.
"Here, there, everywhere. Hold that thought please." Spider-Man shrugged nonchalantly before tossing her high in the air, deflecting and countering several strikes from Titania, jumping up to catch She-Hulk just as Rhino came charging, and finally landing a spinning kick to Rhino's head, causing him to collapse like a stack of bricks on top of Titania. "Now then, you were saying gorgeous?"
"You do know you can put me down anytime, right?" She-Hulk smiled as she wrapped her arms around his neck, not looking to be in any hurry to leave, in-spite of her comment to the contrary.
"Maybe, but how many guys can say that they took down two supervillains while carrying the single hottest woman in the superhero community bridal style through the whole fight?" Spidey quipped.
"Keep making me laugh and scream with pleasure and I'll make sure you're the first." She-Hulk quipped back, her innuendo making one Spider very happy.
*Spider-Sense!*-Flying Rhino!
"What the-?" Spider-Man remarked at the weird danger he was sensing just before Titania deadlifted Rhino and threw him, along with himself and She-Hulk, so that they would be pinned under the titanic thug. "Hold onto something!" He commanded She-Hulk as he dismounted Rhino and landed on a nearby wall.
"You don't need to tell me twice, tiny." She-Hulk purred as she pressed Spider-Man's head into her extremely ample bosom. "I have no plans to let a catch like you go anytime in the near future."
"Enough with the flirty banter!" Titania roared as she stomped over to the duo. "Is this a fight, or a superhero speed date?"
"Why can't it be both?" Spider-Man asked honestly as he fired a webline skyward and swinging at Titania for a She-Hulk sized haymaker and high speeds. "Superheros live fast and reckless, so why can't our relationships be the same?" He casually turned to She-Hulk. "Hi there, I'm the Spectacular Spider-Man. Wanna get married?" He joked.
"Hi, I'm the Sensational She-Hulk, let's have three more dates, five rolls in the hay, and a baby out of wedlock before I foolishly decide you're not the man I fell in love with, and that we should see other people who are just no good for us." She-Hulk grinned as she played along. "See? Fast and reckless, just like my ex-husband said."
"You're making no sense! And since when is he your ex-husband anyway?!" Titania exploded in a fury as she grabbed a manhole cover and threw it like a Frisbee.
"Since five seconds ago." Spider-Man remarked as he fired a web at the manhole cover, ducked, spun around, and She-Hulk pulled the line taut for some added force in the return fire, sending Titania flying into a wall when the heavy metal disc slammed full force into her abs. "And now we're back together because our little baby girl helped us realized what a huge mistake we made splitting up, and that there's nothing we want more than to start a proper family and grow old together."
"Please stop talking...ugh!" Titania grunted as she passed out from the pain.
"I love a man who has his priorities in order." She-Hulk cooed as she hopped out of her fiance's arms. "So where should we honeymoon? Vegas, Fiji, personally I've always wanted to visit Hawaii and hit the surf myself."
"You do know she's unconscious, right?" Spider-Man pointed at Titania. "We don't need to keep bantering."
She-Hulk just grinned lustfully as she easily pulled Spider-Man up by the scruff of his suit. "Who's bantering, Peter?" She purred quietly as she pulled up his mask just enough to start making out with him.
Let it be stated, on record, that Peter was normally very secretive, borderline paranoid about his secret identity getting out and compromising the safety of everyone he knows and loves. He's so dedicated to his secret identity that an idiotic, and in this humble writer's mind completely non-canon version of Spider-Man once traded his marriage to the devil to get it covered up again (and save his aunt's life) after Civil War, which also never happened in canon, no matter what Marvel Comics say. However, let it also be stated on record that Peter was now making out with She-Hulk, and doing a damn good job of it if the way Shulkie was getting weak kneed from how he was exploring her mouth with his tongue and her lower back and ass with his hands was any indication.
Your Honor, I rest my case.
*Spider-Sense!*-Flying Rhino!
"Again?" Spider-Man frowned irritably as his lips reluctantly parted from She-Hulk's, and he had to pick her up again because she was still too wobbly on her feet from the make-out. "We'll finish this later, Honey." He assured her as he casually jumped over the flying Rhino, only to go wide-eyed in shock as he saw what threw him. "WHAT'S A DRAGON DOING IN NEW YORK!" He shouted in astonishment as he gazed in awe upon the house sized, orange-scaled, fire-breathing, flying lizard of death and destruction before him and trembled.
"Oh no, EVA!" Jennifer panicked fearfully.
"What?! You don't think the dragon got her, do you?!" Spider-Man asked worriedly as he ran away from the torrent of fire the dragon launched his way.
"The dragon didn't get to Eva." Jenn shook her head. "The dragon IS Eva!"
"WHAT?!" Spider-Man seized up just as the dragon lunged at him, barely dodging by the skin of his teeth once his Spider-Sense was blaring loudly enough. "Last I checked your partner was dainty waif of a hot goth chick. Exactly how did she become a dragon?!"
"She's a mutant, okay?" Jenn defended her friend as Spidey fired a web of thread over Eva's mouth, keeping her from breathing more fire and providing a good swinging point when she reared her head back defensively. "When she comes in contact with a lot of blood that isn't her own she loses control and turns into, well, this!"
"How much blood are we talking here?" He asked as they swung around Eva's jaw a few times to really secure it tight before landing on her head and firing another thread to for a makeshift set of reins. "Whoaaa-Nelly, settle down now Evie!" He drawled in a mock cowboy accent.
"Enough that we could probably see it from-There!" She-Hulk pointed out a slowly growing red spot in the very alley Spider-Man had changed in before.
"Oh no!" Peter gasped as he felt his heart sink. Without pausing to wonder how that had happened, his instinctive need protect overcame him as he fiercely tugged on the reins, ushering his mount over to the red stain. "Stay here and keep her under control!" He instructed She-Hulk as he dismounted and rushed over to the red area. "Pleasebeokay!Pleasebeokay!Pleasebeokay-huu!" His breath hitched in his throat as he saw what was lying there. A small girl, no more than a preteen at most, hiding in a large cardboard box, feebly holding her deeply wounded arm to try and keep the blood from rushing out, but that alone wasn't the worst part. No, that would be the way her face lit up with hope when she saw him, or more specifically WHY she was smiling at him.
'No way...' Was all Peter could think as he looked at the lining of her box, which he could see now was probably the closest thing this little girl had to a home. Inside of the box were pictures of Spider-Man, every single picture from every paper that ever had his picture. He was so lost in his own mind that he barely even noticed the girl speaking.
"Spider-Man..." The girl uttered weakly. "I knew you'd come to sa-ugh..." She couldn't finish her thought as she blacked out from blood loss.
"NO!" Peter shouted as he quickly scooped up the girl in his arms and began applying first aid. He didn't have any real bandages on him, so he had to make do by ripping the sleeve off his costume, covering the wounded area, and then binding her arm in a makeshift cast and sling made from webbing. Rushing over to Eva, who was struggling to regain control, he webbed her by the horns, and with one arm fiercely yanked her head down, slammed it to the street and punched her on the snout. "Listen up and listen good! This girl needs to get to a hospital, you're gonna take me there, and you're not gonna give me any guff about it! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!" He shouted at her, causing the dragon to nod fearfully. "Good!" He remarked as he hopped back on her head and rode her off into the New York skyline.
Meanwhile, Titania and Rhino, who had both recovered from their earlier spills, looked on in awe at what they had just witnessed. Looking at each other for a moment in shock, awe and fear, they both wisely fainted to save themselves any more trouble. From that day forward, Rhino would really, REALLY consider going legit, while Titania would have a crippling fear of spiders for the rest of her life.
Later - Hospital
It wasn't every day that a superhero came into a hospital to directly deliver a victim of a super villain attack, much less two heroes. Two heroes riding a dragon that turned into a petite nude woman was definitely an all time first though.
"This is all my fault." Spider-Man muttered despairingly. "This is all my fault, this is all my fault, this is all my-ow!" His head snapped to the left as Evangeline slapped him in the face.
"Feeling better now?" Eva asked rhetorically as she adjusted her hospital gown before sitting next to Spidey.
"Not at all." Peter skulked.
"You should feel better." Jenn pat him on the back reassuringly. "It's not your fault those thugs attacked us, you kept things from getting worse, if anything you should be proud."
"Then why didn't I do better?" Peter bemoaned his rotten luck. "You didn't see the way that girl looked at me, with her face full of hope, so relieved and thankful that I showed up, when it was all my fault those two were there to begin with-ow!" He winced as he received a whack to the noggin from a fully suited up Black Cat, who had arrived with Spider-Girl and Firestar. "Is hitting me going to become a regular thing with you girls?"
"Thought you were used to people beating you up." Spider-Girl quipped as the heroines took seats nearby. "In particular, yourself."
"Okay, I guess I deserved that-ow!" He winced as Firestar thwacked him on the shoulder.
"Stop saying you deserve whatever pain comes your way." Firestar scolded him. "You seem to have a hard time accepting this, so I'll say it slowly. Yooouuuu aaaarrrreee aaa heeeerrrooooooooo! So act like it already!" She sniped at him.
"There's more to it this time than just that though." Peter sighed. "It wasn't just that she was hurt and it wasn't just the way she looked at me." Taking a deep breath to collect himself, he continued. "She was homeless. I could tell by the old and patchwork damage to her clothes, and the fact that the box she was taking shelter in was decorated in a bunch of newspaper clippings like a makeshift home."
"That still doesn't explain why you're so worked up about all this." Black Cat inquired in confusion.
"Those newspaper clippings were all of me." Spider-Man frowned as he sunk deeper into his chair, the sudden silence becoming overbearing.
"Excuse me?" A doctor cut in nervously as she approached. "Spider-Man, She-Hulk... and other miscellaneous superheroes?"
"That's us." Jennifer stood up. "How's her condition, doc?"
"To be honest, it doesn't look that good." The doctor frowned as she looked through her charts. "The blood loss and injuries she sustained during the fight were superficial at worst, and only needed a few stitches and blood transfusion to fix. However, you said she was homeless, correct?" The assembled heroes nodded in unison. "Then that would explain the results of this blood test. She's suffering from a number of long term infections and diseases that she likely picked up over a few years on the streets."
"So are you saying... that there's nothing you can do?" Peter felt his heart plummet to his feet, and all the girls who were with him felt their hearts go out to him and the young girl.
"Technically, her condition is treatable," The doctor remarked, making Peter's spirits rise. "However, the procedure would be very expensive, and not to put too fine a point on it or offend you hero types, but her records list her as a frequent runaway from various orphanages across the state. I hate to say it, but-"
"Don't you dare finish that sentence!" Spider-Man hissed at her with such venom that one would be forgiven for thinking he was overtaken by the Symbiote again. "This is a human life we are talking about here! Don't you dare try to add something as frivolous as a dollar sign to-ow!" He winced at a firm slap to his butt from She-Hulk. "You do realize my Spider-Sense detects ahead of time every time you girls slap me. I just choose to let you do it to vent a little." He pointed out as he rubbed his sore posterior.
"Let me handle negotiations from here, will ya babe?" Jennifer put on her lawyer voice as she pulled out a business card and handed it to the doctor. "Jennifer Walters, of Walters & Whedon Law Firm. I currently represent one of the wealthiest individuals in the city, and that girl is an important witness to a crime that can likely be traced back to certain individuals I believe may be after the life of my client. I have currently been given an unlimited expense account by my employer, so long as I can prove to my client that said expenses relate to the case at hand. I believe that getting that young girl the treatment she needs to fully recover so she can fully explain to me, in private, just what she witnessed is highly pertinent to my client's case." As she spoke, she grabbed the papers from the doctor and began filling them out. "Ergo, you will give that little girl the treatment she needs, you will get the most suitable doctor available on the task immediately, and you will not give me any guff about it. Do I make myself perfectly clear?" She punctuated her statement by all but forcefully handing the flustered doctor all the properly filled out paperwork.
"Y-y-yes Ms. Walters! Whatever you say, Ms. Walters!" The doctor panicked before walking away as fast as she could without running.
"What did I tell ya when we first met?" Jennifer smirked at the stunned faces of her clients. "Greater courtroom presence."
"I...I..." Peter tried to respond, only to find that he had no words to address what had just transpired. Ever since he found out about the contents of Norman Osborn's will, he wanted nothing more than to be rid of all the tainted blood money that crook had amassed so he could focus on what he felt was really important, using his powers to fight for the protection and safety of the innocent. But now, not only had all his powers failed to protect one little innocent girl, but it was the very blood money he hated so much that was now being used to save the very same little girl's life. "I don't know what to say." He whispered weakly as his world turned upside-down, and not as a side-effect of crawling on the ceiling like it usually was.
"Thank you might be a good way to start it off." A familiar and unwelcome gruff voice came from a nearby hallway.
"RHINO!" Spider-Man exclaimed quietly as the many heroes assembled in the hall turned to the behemoth. "What do you think you're doing in a hospital? Thinking you can save on cab fare by coming here ahead of time?"
"He is here with me, Spider-Man." X-23 informed him evenly as she and Mary Jane climbed off of his back. "And he has information for you."
"...What?" Was all Spider-Girl could manage to say, as everyone else was too stunned to speak at all.
"Look," Rhino began awkwardly. "I know that I don't exactly have a warm place in yer heart. Heck, I'm probably at least partially responsible for what happened to that little girl getting surgery right now." Realizing that his words were slowly making the heroes even angrier, he adjusted his approach. "But just here me out fer a sec, okay? Fer years I thought I had a pretty decent livin' as a thug. Sure it weren't the most glamorous of lifestyles, but it paid the bills at least. Then I got turned into what I am now and I felt like I could make more money and twist more arms than ever before. What happened today changed all that though." He looked around for a bit before finding a pen and paper, and awkwardly grabbing and using them in his massive hands. "The things I saw and heard today really scared me straight, made me wanna turn over a new leaf. Now don't get me wrong, I ain't gonna turn into no hero like you lot or nothing, but I sure ain't gonna be no crook no more. Here ya go." He remarked as he handed Jennifer the half-crushed pad of paper.
"What exactly am I looking at here?" The jolly green giantess tried to decipher what looked like some very sloppy handwriting.
"It's one a' them affi-whatzit things." Rhino remarked.
"Affidavit?" Evangeline guessed uncertainly, not very happy about important legal terms being mangled, but also very good at hiding it.
"Yeah, that." Rhino nodded. "It's basically me saying that it was the Chameleon what sprung me and Titania from prison."
"The Chameleon?" Firestar remarked suspiciously. "But isn't he in jail too?"
"Unless he had his buddies Mysterio and... that other guy build him a robot duplicate to get arrested for him." Spider-Girl deduced.
"Seriously?" Spider-Man pouted as he dragged his hand across his face. "I can't believe I fell for that again. I mean I knew they were in cahoots at one point, why didn't I connect the dots sooner?"
"Beats me, you're the guy that's always fightin' 'im." Rhino shrugged. "From what I can tell he's been makin' a bit of a business outta disguising himself as big shots in legal channels to fast-track some of us super criminals out onto the streets fer a huge profit."
"He wouldn't happen to have anything to do with the recent release of Kraven The Hunter and Walter Hardy, would he?" Black Cat asked suspiciously.
"Yeah, heard he gave the rich kid that sprung 'em a pretty good deal too." Rhino answered. "Ya know, on account 'a Chameleon and Kraven bein' brothers an' all."
"Chameleon and Kraven are brothers?!" Spider-Man sputtered as words almost failed him. "Yeesh, I'd hate to be invited to that family reunion." I said 'almost'.
"I hear ya." Rhino agreed with the sentiment. "Well, I should get going. The police should be here to cart me off to jail soon, and I don't wanna add anything else to my sentence."
"Feel free to subtract something from that sentence though." Jennifer approached Rhino with her friendliest lawyer tone. "With this information you've given us today there are sure to be far fewer breakouts from prison in the future. At a guess your testimony should be seeing yourself out of jail within the next seven to ten years, especially if I'm defending you, which I will be."
"Seven ta ten, eh?" Rhino grinned as he shook Ms. Walter's hand gratefully. "Yeah, I can live with that. Have a good day, and all that." He waved goodbye as he walked away.
"Huh, the Rehabilitated Rhino." Spider-Man remarked happily. "Who would've thought it?"
"Probably Disney." MJ joked as she leaned against him. "They just eat sappy stuff like this up."
"Yeah..." Spidey trailed off as he shuffled his feet awkwardly. "So... I take it you know too?"
"Saw you changing in the alley." MJ smirked at her boyfriend. "You really need to look both ways before you change, Tiger."
"And I heard it from Gali." Jennifer smirked at the screen and tapped on the glass. "The two of us go way back." She winked knowingly at the audience.
"And I'm just figuring it out now from context." Eva added her two cents playfully.
"...So what happens now?" Spider-Man/Peter Parker asked in wonder.
"You grow." Jennifer smiled softly at him.
Two Days Later - Press Conference at OsCorp
"A lot of you are probably wondering what I'm doing here today." Peter addressed the crowd of reporters and photographers from his podium. "You may be thinking that I'm just a kid who happened to inherit the company of a madman by pure chance or some possibly diabolical plot. And you'd be absolutely right." He paused to let the questions and camera flashes pass by, completely ignored by the young hero. "At first, when I heard that I was now owner of this company, I immediately thought nothing, because I fainted the moment I got the news." He paused to allow the laughter to pass. "Then my second thought was to throw all of this away. The man who built all of this up from nothing was a monster in every sense of the word, and I was afraid that anything connected to it would become just as bad eventually. But I've learned something these past few days, and here it is. We are what we choose to be. I have a huge company and a lot of money at my disposal, and I could choose to be irresponsible with it like my predecessor was, but I won't."
"I won't bother you all with the exact details, but I recently found myself in a bit of a lose/lose situation. The only way I could have won was to cave in and use the money, but that would have cost me my moral stance on the subject. In the end, I didn't even get the chance to make the choice, because a truly sensational hero made the call for me, and I couldn't be happier with the results. As such, I'd like to formally welcome the new official legal team of this company, and my new personal heroes, Ms. Jennifer Walters and Ms. Evangeline Whedon." He gestured to the seated women to his side, who stood and waved to the crowd as they were prompted. "These two will be taking over for the former heads of the legal staff, who will most likely be serving lengthy prison sentences along with several other former high ranking officials of OsCorp in light of the numerous charges against them, including the recent jailbreak of Rhino and Titania."
"And while we're on the subject, I'm not gonna lie or sugarcoat things. This company is in a lot of trouble." He admitted solemnly. "It's no secret that OsCorp has made a lot of poorly thought out and costly decisions in recent history, but now that I'm running this company there are going to be quite a few changes. I intend to make this a company where good people and new ideas are celebrated and supported to the fullest extent I can manage. Connections, money, ambition and public influence will all be secondary to ability, intelligence, compassion and a desire to build a better future. In rebuilding this company, I plan to make a place where the greatest minds in the world can come together to both contribute and receive knowledge and progress freely. A sort of alchemy that combines the advances of the best and brightest in the world. And now for the part you all came for, the renaming of the company."
"I'll admit, OsCorp is both a popular and highly scorned name in equal measure. A fresh start can't happen without a fresh image, and to that end I thought long and hard about what to call it. The first idea that came to mind was, admittedly, Parker Industries. That thought lasted about two seconds before I realized that name was just as egotistical as OsCorp." He paused to allow the laughter to pass. "But then I remembered that both I and what I want this company to be are all products of all that has come into our lives. Take my aunt May for instance," He gestured down to his much healthier looking than usual aunt, who was seated next to a familiar looking young girl in a wheelchair with a bandaged arm. "She and my late uncle Ben raised me to always do right by both myself and others, a lesson reinforced by many friends and circumstances in my life, just like what I want this company to be. We're all products of our environment in one way or another, and I want this company to have the best environment it can have. An alchemy of the best we can all bring to the table; Ladies and Gentlemen, please give a round of applause to Alchemax!" He announced as he pulled a rope connected to a tarp hanging above his head, revealing a logo of a yellow 'A' with a break in the bridge to make the inside resemble an arrow.
"Yes yes yes, that's all very well and good now!" J. Jonah Jameson's loud voice cut through the waning applause like a cheese grater against a tender area. "But I'll have you all know that Parker here has signed an exclusive contract with The Bugle, granting us all legal rights to any media distribution in his name, which means none of you have any legal right to-" The image went to black as we backed away, revealing everything that happened just now to be a prerecorded newscast.
Meanwhile - Jennifer & Evangeline's apartment
"I cannot believe those two." Eva groaned as she pinched the bridge of her nose, the program she was just watching completely forgotten as she trudged overt to her roommate's room and knocked on the door. "Are you two seriously going at it again? Didn't you get it out of your systems last night after the press conference?"
"'Again'?" Jennifer panted as the sounds of the bed creaking slowed slightly. "I think you meant to say 'still'."
"Still?!" Eva panicked as she threw open the door to see Jenn's moaning head poking out from the large and thrashing bulge under the covers. "Have you two been going at it all night long?!"
"Yes and noOOoooOOooo!" Laura moaned as she head and arms flopped off the side of the bed. "I joined in six hour agooooOOOOOOOOO!" She howled in unbridled pleasure.
"A threesome..." Eva stared in astonishment, some questions being answered while more arose. "Exactly how much of this is Parker satisfying you two, and how much is you two satisfying each other?"
"It's mostly Peter." Felicia panted with her tongue hanging out. "Though Gwen is doing quite a bit of work too. Those Spiders really know how to please a gyyaaaalll!"
"You keep-oh God, YES!-getting the numbers wrong too, Eva." Liz added, though she didn't emerge from the covers. "This is a lot more than a threesome-oh GOD, it's so big!"
"Okay, before I blow a gasket, just how many of you are in there?" Evangeline asked ruefully, instantly regretting using the word 'blow'.
"There's me and five girls." Peter raised his hand from under the covers. "Could you give us a moment? None of us besides Jenn are really into being watched."
"Five women?" Eva asked, getting a thumbs up from Peter. "And you're satisfying all of them?" Peter gave that one a so-so. "Don't be so modest, I've never heard Jenn so aroused." Pausing to contemplate the implications of the Sensational She-Hulk not just being satisfied sexually, but completely through the roof with pleasure, she quickly began removing all her clothes and jewelry. "Got room for one more in there? I'm not completely opposed to one night stands." Not bothering to wait for an answer, she quickly crawled under the covers and began reaching around for a handhold. Ten seconds later her voice rang out through the apartment. "Oh GOD! Not a one night stand! Not a one night stand! Lifelong commitment, please marry me!"
Meanwhile - Prison
A completely white hand irritably turned off a television mounted in the corner. "You two got some nerve showing up here after you cost me my freedom." Chameleon hissed at the pair that had hired him to break out Rhino and Titania.
"Don't look at us!" Panicked the first man as he tried to back away, only to be blocked by Kraven. "It was Rhino that sold you out, and Daredevil that tracked you down! You should be going after those guys, not us!"
"Well my brother can't exactly take out his anger on those two, now can he?" Kraven growled at the two tiny men. "Daredevil is on the outside, and Rhino was transferred to nicer prison upstate for his cooperation. That just leaves you two." He hissed in their ears menacingly.
"I may not be able to act overtly against anyone without extending my sentence," Chameleon noted as he gave a sideways glance to the armed guards keeping a close eye on them. "But I have ways of making your stay here very... unpleasant, shall we say." He grinned down sadistically at the terrified pair.
Meanwhile - Undisclosed location
"And this brings us to your current position, Mr. Osborn." A hyper-dominate looking woman with long dark green hair and a dark green leather catsuit remarked coldly at her bound captive after turning off the television. "That little hit you put out against Spider-Man not only cost us our greatest living weapon, but it also ended up exposing several of our bases to both SHIELD, and more importantly Deadpool and The Punishers, costing us a great deal of manpower and resources in a very short amount of time. Add to that the sudden draining or seizure of all your private accounts, and you can see why HYDRA is not so inclined to show you mercy. I'm not an unreasonable woman though, I know you're a very skilled individual. If you can give me reason to believe that you have some way of compensating for even half of our losses then I will spare you your life and any further hassle."
For many long and agonizing seconds, the beaten and bloodied form of Norman Osborn remained completely silent, staring at his captors and tormentors with contempt. "I could say any number of things in my defense right now." He finally began. "I could point out how I only paid you to target Spider-Man, and that your weapon's failure and defection is on your head, not mine. I could denounce the stupidity of my former son, and how his selfish, short-sighted, and egotistical bumbling ruined months of careful planning, deception, and manipulations in mere hours. I could even resort to remarking how utterly impossible and unforeseeable by even the greatest tacticians that the mere idea of such a straight-laced hero as Spider-Man teaming up with a lunatic mercenary like Deadpool and such ultra-violent extremists as The Punishers is. I'm not going to do any of that though."
"You kind of just did." The woman smirked at Osborn's attempt at humor, whether it was intentional or not.
"Witty." Osborn deadpanned dryly. "Let's skip the pleasantries, shall we Madame Hydra? I could easily beg for my life, or offer some feeble defense, or try to bargain with you and offer you the services of my genius mind until your perception of my debt to you is paid. I won't do any of that though. Not just because I'm better than that, but also because I've been in your shoes before. I know what it means to have someone completely at your mercy, and then ruin their whole future just for the sake of the bottom line. We both know you've already made up your mind about what to do with me, and nothing I say or do is going to change that. But I'll be damned before I let you rob me of my pride. I've never apologized, and I've never backed down from a challenge. So go ahead, do your worst."
Madame Hydra let out an amused chuckle at Norman's response and slowly applauded him. "Well done, Mr. Osborn, well done indeed. I'll admit, I'm very impressed by your response." She approached him, the sound of her heels on hard metal tile echoing through the room as she bent down to eye level. "Most people would crack after what you've been through, but you clearly aren't most people. You're a very exceptional individual Mr. Osborn, and it would be such a waste to let a man of such great... talent," She hummed seductively as she ran her fingers across his chest. "Go without a prominent place in our organization. I believe you could be of just as much service to HYDRA as Hydra could be of service to you." She tugged his belt lose eagerly with a single twitch of her finger.
"A very tempting offer." Osborn grinned as he leaned in close to Madame Hydra. "It's so good in fact, that I might even be willing to overlook this little... incident."
Grinning, Madame Hydra leaned in close to Norman, her hands trailing up his torso seductively until she finally causally pushed herself away from him and lashed out with a roundhouse kick to his face, a small blade hidden in the back of her heel cutting through his cheeks with surgical precision and giving him a full Glasgow Grin.
"You didn't honestly think I'd fall for your little ploy, did you Normy-boy?" Madame Hydra sadistically looked down on the awkwardly screaming little man. "I had you pegged from the moment you first contacted us with your little hit on Spider-Man. I know your type very well Normy-boy. You look down on everyone that isn't as perfect as yourself, and you always believe that you're sly enough to turn any situation to your advantage. Given even the slightest opening you can make almost anyone your bitch, which is why I'm not giving you anything but pain and humiliation, Normy-boy. You may think that you're in the big leagues, that you can't be broken, but I'm gonna let you in on a little secret, Normy-boy." She whispered as she leaned down to his bloodstained ear. "You're not in the big leagues, you're barely even a player, and everyone can be broken, especially someone as pathetic as you when put up against a woman like me." Harshly pushing his face back into the chair, Madame Hydra walked away and grabbed a towel from one of her subordinates to wipe off the blood without a single backwards glance. "See to it that he's left alive after you break him, his mind can still be of some use to us."
"Madame Hydra, a moment of your time." An unimportant grunt approached the woman, who quickly signaled him to speak. "Over the past few weeks we've been periodically picking up strange traces of some unknown energy in New York. We're not certain what exactly it is, but we have reason to believe it may have some connection to the gem that was stolen from one of our facilities by Spider-Man a few weeks ago."
"Interesting." Madame Hydra hummed thoughtfully as she looked over the energy signatures. "This certainly bares investigation, but we can't afford to have this be traced back to us, especially while we're still vulnerable from that attack. Hire an outside contractor to investigate, but make sure you use a local, less suspicious that way. If we've managed to track down this signature, you can bet that other parties have as well." Her eyes narrowed in suspicion at the approximate epicenter of this energy signature.
Midtown High.