disclaimer: I do not own Deathnote, if I did there would be more mentions of Mello and Matt in the anime.

Mello's Pov:

The amount of relief that I felt when I woke up the next morning, and remembered the night before, was unbelievable. That fight..that whole thing reminded me of how important Matt is to me. How much I love him, and I couldn't believe how long we fought like that, let alone how we survived through it. Now..after that, I didn't know how I could have ever wanted something more, if all it was going to do, was that.

But then why was I gazing longingly at Matt's sleeping form in the early morning light?

I guess if I had a sin it would be greed, because I still want him, and I'm still more than platonically in love with him, even after that. But I wouldn't make a move, the next move would be his, if there is one, because I wouldn't destroy things again, no way.

I blushed as I thought about holding him, kissing him, and promptly rolled off the bed, landing my feet on the floor soundlessly and rubbing my eyes with my hand.

Matt..I love you, and you love me too. But is it more than platonically? You seemed to have made it clear that you don't, so I won't mess things up if you don't. But if you do, please tell me first thing. Because I have to hope, and I can't be your friend forever.

I took one last glance at Matt's sleeping form, before silently slipping out of the room and heading to the shower.

My hair still dripping wet, I opened up our bedroom door. I had expected Matt to still be asleep, so I was surprised when I walked in on him just pulling on his signature striped shirt. He noticed me immediately, and I saw his face turn red as he hurried to slip it on, before turning to me, his hair still a mess of red.

I stayed still, blushing furiously and scolding myself for the uncontrollable action. He just looks so...hot. There, I said it, that poisonous word, Matt without a shirt is extremely hot. He's not even anything special, he has no muscles, no apparent abs, he's just, thin and soft looking...

"Mels?"

I bit by tongue and shook my head, muttering a barely audible 'Sorry' under my breath as I made my way to my bed, and began to smooth out the covers. A second passed almost awkwardly, before Matt spoke up, giving me a slight pause.

"There's no reason to say sorry" I turned to look at him, and was met with a grin, causing me to raise my eyebrows at him.

"Okay?"

He grinned even wider, "I take it as a compliment is all" he waved me off as he grabbed a pair of clothes off his dresser, "I'm gonna have a shower too, see ya in a bit" he finished, before heading too the bathroom, still smiling goofily. I stayed there, stunned for a moment, before a smile made its way onto my lips too.

Everything is fine.

L's Pov:

I smiled as I watched Matt and Mello playfully bickering over a game of Crazy Taxi near the back of the arcade, while I sat beside Near on a bench just by the door of the shop.

It was nice to see the two of them getting along again. A few days ago, after Light and I's tiff, we came back home to find that the two had made up, which was a pleasant surprise. I was wondering when it would finally happen, as the two had really been pushing it.

But the thing that concerned me is Mello's feelings, because he clearly still has them. And now especially, as I watch them bumping shoulders at the game booth, grinning at each other and sitting rather closely, I can tell that their problem is brimming. And even, Matt may have feelings for Mello as well.

They needed to talk, and I wasn't even sure what was holding them back at this point, at least on Matt's side. Then again, I was being hypocritical in thinking that.

Light was confusing me. He seemed to have feelings for me, clearly actually, but then he didn't want to let me know. And then he wanted to know if I had feelings for him, clearly, but he was also scared to know, so it seemed.

I was confused, and that was kind of a first, and I was also a little scared, because I felt a pull to Light lately. To..I don't exactly know, just to be close to him I supposed. But maybe it was just because I know Light has feelings for me, and I'm acting out.

If I do like Light, well, knowing him it would mostly spell trouble for his emotional state, perfectionism and all. And if I don't, he's going to break eventually, like Mello did..

"Hey L! Near!" 'Speak of the devil, and he shall arrive' I thought listlessly as I turned my head to see Misa and Light at the doorway of the shop. Misa was the one who spoke, while Light was only tagging along behind her. Even though he had broken up with her, she still had the terrible habit of being around him at all times. It was rather irritating, but I could still rely on Misa to know where he is at most times of the day, so it had its bonuses I supposed.

"Hello, Misa, Light, how are you?" I responded as I stood up to greet the two, and vaguely noted Matt and Mello pausing their game in the background to look at the new arrivals.

"I'm great L! I haven't been to the arcade in years" The blond chirped, while Light only sent me a sheepish smile from behind her, silently telling me that he is indeed, not enjoying himself all that much.

"Well that's a pity, as you can tell Matt and Mello are having the time of their lives, and they used to come here quite often" I noted, humoring her a little, and also giving her room to leave and greet the two. I wanted to speak with Light, even if it wasn't about anything important.

"Oh!" She piped, turning her attention to the two boys at the end of the shop for a moment, before turning to me again. "I didn't realize they were here, I'm gonna go say hi okay?" Her gaze flitted to Light for a second, and when he just smiled at her, she headed off to the two with a wave. As she left, Light made to sit beside Near, giving the boy a light greeting that was only responded to with a small nod, as expected.

"How are you doing Light?" I questioned as I took a seat on the bench beside him, and proceeded to gaze at him intently.

He shrugged, not bothering with formalities with me. "Nothing really, I'm just a bit tired" He supplied easily as he looked over at Mello and Matt, who were currently laughing at something Misa said. "They seem happy" He noted.

I nodded, knowing he was thinking along the same lines as I was a few moments ago. "They are, but I don't think you are though" I then told him, earning a glare as he huffed, and a questioning glance from the pale boy beside him. I only smiled lightly, dismissively, and turned my gaze to the group of teens across from us, as Mello and Matt tried to get Misa to play a game of sorts.

Light wasn't going to talk right now, but that was fine. He would, as long as I was persistent.

Matt's Pov:

I was still smiling from today, even though it had been eight hours since we had gotten back. It was just so nice, for everything to be near normal as we played games and teased Misa.

Though I felt a pang in my chest even so, because I have feelings for Mello, and I don't know how to tell him. Kind of funny I supposed, because this is how Mello felt weeks ago, before he told me. Except, I know he feels the same, so only apprehension is holding me back now.

What if he changes his mind?

But I know that that is a silly thought simply built up from nerves. The bigger question, is how will I handle it? A frown made its way on my face as I continued to think, and my stomach started slowly sinking.

What would happen if I tell him? Will he be happy? Upset? Shocked? I want him to be happy, but what if he displays one of the other feelings? What if he thinks I'm lying?

Again, its a silly notion, surely he wouldn't?

I refrained from the urge to groan outwardly as I processed my feelings, and instead turned to look at the blond on the other side of the room, currently laying on his bed on his back, with a book in his hands. Not a schoolbook for once, but a fiction called 'Golden Blood' that I faintly recalled reading when I was younger at Wammy's House. It was about a girl that could time travel, but I honestly couldn't recall much else of it, it had been nine years since I had read it after all.

Dismissing the book, my eyes drifted across his thin frame, and I felt that urge to pull his body to mine again. To just feel his warmth, run my hands through his hair, kiss his cheek...

This time I did shake my head, though he luckily was too focused on his book to notice, and I instead put down my(Light's, actually) partially abandoned laptop and stood up. I wasn't really thinking about it, I just knew I wanted it, and that he most likely wasn't going to refuse.

He wouldn't right?

I came up to his bed, catching his curious gaze with a small and nervous smile, and sat down beside him. I paused for a small second, before removing one of his hands from the book and laying down in the crook of his shoulder, with my head resting my his neck. I shifted slightly, noting that he wasn't moving in the slightest, definitely uncomfortable, and I wrapped his hand around my waist, before letting out a content sigh.

"Matt?" He questioned after a second, earning a shrug from me as I smiled, But didn't respond. He paused for a moment, before just going back to his book and continuing to read, still obviously uncomfortable with the position, but not having the will to tell me to leave.

At that, I relaxed further beside him, and closed my eyes, letting my mind drift.

Mello, despite being so skinny was very comfortable, and I felt content to just lay there forever.

Mello's Pov:

What? Why? How?

Not that I didn't find it extremely contenting, but...why? Out of all the things I thought he wanted when he sat down beside me, cuddling was not one of them, and I was confused beyond belief to as why he did it. A part of me thought that; just maybe, he felt something for me, but I dismissed it once again.

I wasn't really focusing on my book now, (which is quite typical of me) and was instead paying attention to Matt's steady breathing against my cheek. He had his eyes closed, his eyelashes resting against his cheeks enamouringly, and his hair falling in his face slightly due to his goggles being around his neck for once, and the image made me feel terribly fluttery inside.

The plain green shirt he was wearing had ridden up his side a little, revealing a strip of tantalizingly pale white skin, and any other time I would have my eyes glued to that spot. But right now..He just seemed so sweet, content and beautiful, I could only stare at his face. My stomach was squirming, and his lips were in just the right place that if I leaned down, just slightly, I could easily kiss him. I withheld the urge, but I wanted to so badly.

Why would he do this when he knows how I feel about him? And this much?

I wanted to say something, but any words were stuck in my throat, and I forced myself to read my book for the next few moments instead. Trying to ignore the fact that my other hand was still resting on his stomach, and I could so easily move it slightly to reach underneath his shirt...

I bit my lip as I realized that fact, and closed my eyes, fighting with myself between the feeling of wanting to run off and shuffle closer to him.

Maybe...

"Matt..?" I voiced his name for a second time as I opened my eyes, and could care less when it came out as less than a whisper. His only response was a light 'Hm?', and I sighed resignedly instead of saying anything else.

A few seconds later, I barely noticed it when I started to move my thumb around in light circles above his shirt, and when I did, I didn't bother to stop. Especially when a light smile came onto his face. I was confused, I didn't understand why he moved all the way over here, but in essence I didn't mind. He was warm, and comfortable...

I set down my book, not stopping the movements of my thumb, and relaxed into my place beside him while closing my eyes again, my nose burying itself in his hair. He smelled like cinnamon and chocolate, no doubt from mixing both of our shampoo's together, and I found a gentle smile making its way onto my face as well as I snuggled into him some more, my other arm wrapping around him too.

We stayed like that for a long time, I don't know how long, but I was sinking into sleep when I felt him shift and one of his hands placed on my cheek. My eyes opened promptly, and he was looking at me shyly, a blush spread across his cheeks. I opened my mouth in attempts to say something, but I didn't know what to say, if I could even speak in that moment.

His thumb was stroking my cheek, and he moved his face closer to mine, so when he spoke I could feel his breath on my lips.

"Can I kiss you?" It was whispered sultrily even though that probably wasn't the intention, and the words sent tingles through me, and my face to fire. I could barely register what was happening, and disbelief was apparent in my expression, I was sure. I barely managed the nod, before his lips met mine softly and tentatively. I closed my eyes and responded to the kiss, meeting my lips to his compliantly, with my heart practically beating out of my chest.

He lifted his body against mine, kissing gently still, and it was just like I had always imagined a kiss with him being like. Except a hundred times more real.

One of his hands was rubbing my waist lightly now, while the other was supporting his weight. And I was in near the same position, except my hand had moved to his cheek.

Soon, almost too soon, I thought, though I knew we most definitely needed to talk, he pulled away, leaving one chaste kiss on my lips as he met my eyes. I almost choked on all of the emotions I felt in that moment, and a soft smile, bordering on grin made its way onto both of our faces.

I couldn't help leaning in to peck his lips again, before I sat up properly, still positioned closely to him and almost sitting in his lap. He looked dreamy, and not the least bit disturbed about what just happened, this comforted me, but also made more questions rise to the surface of my mind. I took a breath before I spoke, just at the same time as him, but he closed his mouth and let me continue, intently looking at me, and seemly not embarrassed at all.

I paused for a moment, before I collected my words. "D-does this mean you feel the same way..as I do?"

He grinned, and that along with his next words was confirmation enough for me.

"I do, I really do Mels" He murmured softly, making all of my previous questions melt away as he wrapped both of him arms around my neck, a smile still on his lips. "I didn't know I felt this way about you until a few days ago, but..I love you, more than anything"

I grinned, before I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him to me in a firm hug, burying my face into his neck. The feelings coursing through me were uncontrollable, it was an amount of happiness and relief that I had never once felt in my life. I couldn't believe it, but I could so much, and I was so happy.

Matt let out a chuckle a returned the hug fully, kissing my neck softly as he did so, and I felt Like I was going to burst.

Matt loves me.

I pulled back and placed another kiss on his lips, still grinning brightly, and my expression was surely a mirror of his as he kissed me back, pulling me into a lying position beside him and peppering my face with more little kisses.

L's Pov:

Something was different.

I noticed it as soon as Matt and Mello came downstairs late in the morning, and they had obviously slept in, as they were still sleepy. But it was in their eyes, they were most definitely happier than yesterday, and I thought then, that they were happy. But this was a completely different kind of happiness, and it only took me a few seconds to figure out what it was.

A smirk formed on my face as I realized this, and I continued with my preparations of lunch for everyone.

It was when Beyond came out of his room that I was met with another surprise, though this one was a little less important to me, and more concerning.

"Guess what just happened?" He piped childishly, jumping up on the counter beside me and earning curious looks from Matt and Mello, who had taken their places on the living room couch and could just barely see into the kitchen.

I gave him a distracted glance as I continued to stir a rice mixture that I was cooking, and humored him, "What is it Beyond?"

He grinned, leaning closer to me. "Naomi just called me, she wants to go out for a date today"

I frowned at him, "Just be careful okay?" Beyond had problems, and at times, he didn't deal with rejection well. If he got together with her and she dumped him later on..it would spell a fair bit of trouble. My question of course earned a scowl from Beyond, and he hopped off the counter dejectedly.

"Whatever L, you're just upset that I have an opportunity with Naomi and you can't have Light" He muttered as Walked out of the room, surprising me and giving me a pause.

Since when did he even have an idea about that? Though he was wrong, and just acting out. I didn't realize it was obvious, actually I don't think it even is, at all.

"What about you and Light?" Matt questioned, raising his voice to be heard clearly across the room, and I shook my head, turning slightly to face the duo sitting in the other room.

"Nothing, Beyond just overreacts when it comes to me, he's always done it" I explained, and Matt gave a nod, understanding in his eyes. It wasn't a long shot to say that Light had told him a small amount of Beyond and I's past, and that didn't bother me in the slightest, so I just continued with my cooking. Though I placed my attention on them as Matt spoke up again, to Mello this time.

"Hey, if they're going out, would you like to also?" The question was definitely directed at Mello, who gave a pause, before speaking.

"You mean..?" From his tone he was clarifying what he thought Matt was implying, without specifically revealing it to me.

"Yep, a date"

I imagine him withholding a smile, as he replied with a quiet; "Of course"

Matt and Mello left for their 'date' at about 17:00, and Beyond left shortly after, leaving Near, Light and myself in the house alone. Sachiko was, as usual, at her Sunday mothers' group dinner for the evening, and Soichiro wouldn't be back until 20:00 as well.

So it was quiet right now, with Light doing his studies up in his room and Near playing with his new racetrack on the carpet beside the couch, where I was currently watching a poor quality reality Tv show.

My mind was on Light, and the fact that I wanted to talk to him, as I usually did.

Why did I want him to tell me so bad? Well as much as I wanted to deny it, I think it was because I was beginning to have feelings for him. Or rather, I have had for awhile, and thats where this interest came from in the first place.

I had gotten a handle on these feelings, or at least an understanding, but maybe I was ahead of myself. Kissing Light? Romantic feelings for Light? I criticized myself for not knowing more about emotions, apparently these reality Tv shows didn't help me in the slightest either.

If I simplify it, would I want to kiss him?

I didn't know, I care for Light, a lot, but I had never kissed someone before, and I had never particularly craved human contact. Though, Light is the only person I would allow to touch me like that, and have. I didn't particularly mind it either...

I frowned, and turned my gaze to Near, as he seemed deep in thought as well, as he watched his racetrack intently. I considered asking him a question, about what he knows about emotions like this, but I decided not to. Instead I stood up, and headed upstairs to Light and I's bedroom. Near gave me a glance as I left, but being his usual quiet self, he didn't say anything. I doubted that Near would know anything, if I had asked.

When I got upstairs, our door was open, and Light was leaning up against his bed contentedly with a notebook and pen, though he looked up at me when I entered.

"Hey, what's up?" He asked carelessly, though his expression changed to a slightly knowing one when I moved to crouch down across from him.

"I'm fine Light, I just wanted to talk to you" I was going to get it out of him this time, whatever I had to do to get it. He scowled promptly as I spoke, and set his book down.

"Okay L, just say whatever, lets get this interrogation over with" He drawled, though I could see a bit of helplessness in his voice, not just his agitation.

"Wonderful, now-"

He cut me off abruptly, "-No, I don't like you that way, are we done now?"

I paused, giving him a disdainful look and raising my finger to my lip, "That's not actually what I was going to ask you Light-kun" I stated, earning a mixed expression from him; curiosity, disdain, comprehension...an array of emotions really.

"Then what was it?" He sighed, pulling one of his legs to his chest.

"I was wondering how you would feel about a homosexual relationship with me" As soon as I said that, I knew I was pushing it, and the next few things happened so apparently. First his eyes widened, then his eyebrows furrowed, seconds before anger flashed across his face and he tensed up. He glared at me, processing something through his mind, and when I was just about to question him, he raised his fist, and I was sent flying a few feet into the other wall with an empty thump.

I felt dizzy for a second, and found my hand placed on my throbbing cheek as my eyes focused on Light again, who was now standing. I frowned at him.

"That was really unnecessary Light-kun" I stated, though I knew he had plenty reason for the hit, as I made to stand up again. But before I could fully regain my composure, Light was at me again. As he walked up to me, grabbed my shirt and shoved me against the wall harshly. "Light-" His name escaped my lips automatically.

"Shut up L!" He growled, not even two inches from my face, and I found myself almost completely relaxed despite the compromising situation. I guess I trust him.. "You don't get to do this! You know how I feel and you play it like some sort of sick, twisted game!" He paused for a second, before his voice dropped, "You're playing me like a game, just like before"

I flinched at that, as he lowered his head to stare at the floor. It was true, I have always done things like this as if they were a game, its just the way I learned to cope.

"You know how I feel, all to well, we both know it.." His voice was strained, and it got to me. I knew what he was saying, precisely, but sadly, I couldn't help it. A second passed slowly, before I swiftly lifted my knee and kicked him in the gut, hard. He let out a strangled noise as he tumbled off of me, and I was left to regain my balance on the floor.

He was glaring me now, disdainfully, but after a second he just glowered at me and straightened up. "Whatever L, I'm just going to let you cool down" And with that he turned and began to walk off, but before he could make even a few steps I grabbed his arm. At the motion he instinctively turned to hit me again with his fist, but I predicted it this time, and let him go. Before wrapping my other arm around his waist and meeting his fist with my palm, then I met his fearful eyes, a millisecond before my lips were pressed against his.

He froze, not moving at all, and I wondered if I had made a mistake. Light could be unpredictable, I knew, and I could have just made it worse. But just a these thoughts crossed my mind, his body relaxed in mine, his fist unfolded in my hand and his fingers laced with mine. And after what seemed like a hesitant second of thought, he lips began to move against mine.

It felt strange, but welcome and I figured out what was going on rather quickly, as his other hand wound itself around my waist. The kiss deepened, putting me out of my comfort zone until I got used to it, and my heartbeat increased.

Soon he pulled away, and he looked entirely confused. He paused, his eyes sparkling as they stayed glued to mine, and his lips searching for the words for his question, but I beat him to it.

"I have feelings for you, I apologize for playing these games with you, and I didn't mean for it to hurt like that" I spoke gently, and he let his arms both fall back to his side, though he didn't take a step away at all.

"I"m sorry too" He whispered, and raised his hand up to my cheek to emphasize his point. "For this, and for being an idiot"

Beyonds Pov:

I trailed behind Matt and Mello as we walked down the street to get back home, deep in thought.

Matt and Mello bumped into Naomi and I on our date, and we were in the same restaurant for most of the night. Though it wasn't like they interrupted, so that wasn't the reason for my solemn mood in the slightest. I just didn't enjoy the date. All of those days spent fantasizing about nights like that with Naomi, and after being put down by her, I finally got the date, but I just didn't enjoy it as much as I thought I would. We talked, we laughed, we even kissed, but it just wasn't...Exciting?

I didn't know the word, but I guess there just wasn't a connection. Looking at Matt and Mello, they were happily chatting just a few feet ahead of me, holding hands and giving the odd kisses, simply radiating happiness. But me? Shouldn't I be beaming or something? There was nothing wrong with the date, but I feel like I just got back from a gathering with friends.

Did I do something wrong? Is there something wrong with me?

I didn't think so, we kissed, held hands, the like. I sighed. I'm not even really disappointed either, I just feel normal. I guess I can just hang out with Near for the rest of the night.. The prospect cheered me up, if only a little.

We reached the house soon enough, and Matt unlocked the door, letting Mello and I inside, before going inside himself. The two quickly took off their jackets and shoes, and hurried upstairs after saying their goodbyes to me, while I just took my time and made my way into the living room.

Just like when I had left, he was still playing with that racetrack he had gotten earlier, and when I stepped into the room he looked up, giving me a light smile.

"Hello Beyond, how was your date with Naomi?"

I shrugged and sat down beside him, resting my legs in front of myself and using my palms to hold myself up as I responded. "It was okay, I guess"

"Hmm" He acknowledged as he repositioned some of the cars, "Light and L had a fight" he then noted, catching my attention.

"Really? What about?"

He shrugged, "I do not know, I just heard yelling shortly after you left"

"Huh.." I sounded thoughtfully, earning a brief glance from Near, though he didn't say anything else and just continued with his track, seemingly fascinated with the electronic set.

Eventually I was the one who spoke up, "So what have you been up to lately anyway?" since Naomi had declined that date with me, he had been acting a bit differently, I'm sure L and Light noticed it too.

He paused, before turning to look at me, he seemed to be deciding whether to tell me or not. "I have been researching psychology" After a moment he supplied simply, earning a wondering expression from me.

"Explain?" I requested, earning a barely noticeable sigh from him.

"Something happened awhile ago, and I realized it would be best if I taught myself psychology, as our school does not offer the classes"

"Oh" I drawled, "Gotcha"

"Hm" He simply sounded as he raised a hand to curl a piece of his hair, I watched the movement with idle curiosity, but did not question it and instead laid down on the floor with my head resting on my arms.

Near was an interesting one, almost similar to L in a way, but with the exception that I didn't mind him, of course.

Authors note: Oh, My..I'm so tired :( I'm sure this has a few mistakes in it, so please tell me if you noticed any worth mentioning, and that includes plot holes of course. And I would just like to mention that this is not the end! That will be in two or three more chapters :) Annnd, the book Mello was reading is from the 'Time spirit trilogy', its really good! You should see if you can get your hands on them.

Also, I was feeling extremely unmotivated before I wrote this, and then the lovely 'MaladaptiveDaydream' reviewed, and as soon as I read your review, I wrote this up. So thank you so much for that, and I hope this chapter is satisfactory! :)