Taylor's POV
Arrgh crap, alert situation just hit DEFCON1.
The she-devil is in the elevator.
Ana is in or about to be in her room without the support that he wanted to provide and he's feeling like shit for shouting at her and wants to get back to try and salvage the situation. He's quite predictable sometimes but what we don't know is her reaction, I don't think she's one to be walked all over. I like her already.
The Boss is in a really bad place at the moment having had no sleep last night and probably just 2 disrupted hours over the last 48 and even for him that's bad. I know he spent last night figuring stuff out and I hope I find out what it was because it is messing with his head today, I can see it in his eyes.
Woah, I think I'll stand right behind him so that I can hold him back if I need to although I'd like to let him at her with that look on his face, I don't know what he figured out last night but I'd bet it included something about the she-devil because he visibly shuddered when he saw her.
Ooh, better get closer because here he goes it's not a question but a roar and she shrinks back against the wall of the elevator. "What the fuck are you doing here? Why did you come here last night and try to get into Anastasia's room? What is your fuckin' problem with Anastasia? You don't even know her or do you? Just stay the fuck away from her and from me"
And I am amazed, she attempts to pull herself into some sort of commanding position and he just growls and says "Just cut that shit, it isn't going to work on me anymore". Anymore? Ugh, I do NOT want to know…. Aw Good God, No! I hope that light-bulb moment for me isn't true, well, it might explain something about his predilections. I have to shake my head to get rid of the image that just appeared, she's got to be as old as his mother.
Thankfully the elevator reaches our floor and the door opens but he doesn't let her out of the elevator, with a deathly quiet voice he leans into her face and says "You are going down, you are not coming out. If you come anywhere near Anastasia, I will personally ensure that you are ruined here and anywhere else you might care to tread. Do you understand me?" He pulls himself up, straightens his shoulders. "Am I making myself clear?" she looks beaten for the moment and he presses the ground floor button and steps out of the elevator without looking back at the evil cow.
"Make sure you put someone on her, I need to know her every movement, if she comes anywhere near here, even just once, I will have a restraining order organised and served quicker than she can remove your foot from her ass. Am I clear, I don't care what you have to do, she will NOT cause any more damage to Ana."
"With pleasure Sir" Oh nothing would give me greater pleasure than removing her from all areas of our lives, if I never saw her face again, I would be happy but I know that is not going to happen, she exists like that rotten smell that hangs around the men's locker rooms, not matter what you do, it never ever goes away.
Christian's POV
Why was Elena here? Is she trying to control me only or does she have something to do with trying to hurt Ana, surely she could not have had something to do with the accident. Could she? Shit this is going to drive me crazy but I don't want to think about her today. I have some serious grovelling to do with Ana, I need her to understand that I simply can't deal with her being in pain.
Sawyer is now standing outside Ana's door so I know she is back in there, Taylor says he will stay outside to discuss the security situation with him and organise the extra surveillance with Welch. I know he is also giving me the space to make as much or as little of a fool of myself as I need to make it up to Ana.
I quietly push open the door and Ana doesn't look at me and it is only once I get next to the bed that I realise that she is asleep, it breaks my heart, hah, my cold dead heart comes alive around Ana, to see tear tracks down her face. I place the flowers on the table next to her and gently lift her arm and place the bear under her arm so that when she wakes, she'll be looking at his hopeful face. I can't stand to see the tears and brush my lips across those gorgeous cheekbones to soak them up and she whimpers quietly in her sleep but her luscious lips turn up slightly in a smile and she wriggles as if finding a more comfortable position and clasps the teddy tight and continues to sleep. I hold my breath as she moves as I don't want to wake her and I am warmed by the fact that at least in her sleep she didn't turn away and looked happy with my touch.
As I did yesterday, I place my hand under hers and rest my head on the edge of the bed, trying to figure out what I am going to say and before I know it, the gentle rhythm of her breathing lulls me into a restful dreamless sleep.
An hour later I am woken by a quiet whimpering and a twisting hand in mine and I surreptitiously press the IV pain relief button a little, I know she doesn't want pain relief but her body will heal the better for it so I do and know that if she was awake, she'd be angry with me. She's not awake so I can take care of her and I have to somehow convince her to let me take care of her. It's hard to let someone do that when you've always fended for yourself. I understand that.
I need to speak to Taylor but I don't want to risk Ana waking up without me being here and thinking I don't care so I take my pen and on the card that came with the flowers I quickly write.
"Hi my name is T Hardy but you can call me Bear.
I am here for you when Christian can't be there.
Feel free to hug me, to chase away bad memories or take away the pain
Even though from the pain killers you really should NOT refrain.
I know you are used to having to look out for others and yourself
Well, I am here for hugging and not for putting on the present shelf.
So while you think you might be able to do it all on your own
I'd like a hug now because I don't like to be left alone
And just so you know, Christian is ashamed and does worry
That he upset you…He never meant to and is really very sorry"
It's not the world's best poetry and it's rather silly but I hope she likes it, my first ever attempt and I attach it to the ribbon around his neck and place him back under her arm, give her the whisper of a kiss on the forehead and head out to speak to Taylor.
Ana's POV
Bother, I was dreaming about my finals and it woke me up in a cold sweat, it was one of those horrid anxiety dreams where on the morning of an exam you wake up late, the car breaks down, you miss the exam and discover that you are sitting outside the exam room in your pink bunny pyjamas. I look around the room and realise I am alone and my heart sinks a little, I was hoping Christian would be here but then I realise I am cuddling a bear.
A gorgeous ginger bear with a hopeful face and a note from Christian, aww how cute, see he does have a tender side despite the fact that he shouted at me. As I read his corny little note, the tears come unbidden. He truly is looking out for me and I get that but I am so used to nobody looking out for me or being interested in me – his note speaks volumes of his observations and care. T Hardy is the author of my favourite book, somehow I know he knows that bad things have happened before, he doesn't know why I don't want to take the drugs but then he probably has never seen someone's life ruined by drugs. The note says other things between the lines and I wonder if he meant for them to show, he desperately needs to be hugged yet from what I can see, he doesn't let anyone hug him, not even his mum and despite his tough, and somewhat scary, exterior, I think he's scared, I don't know what of but I want him to feel safe with me. I feel safe with him, he will just have to learn that he can't walk all over me and I think he saw a touch of that today.
Gosh, what am I doing, my thoughts are so scattered, I am talking like we are a couple, for all I know he is playing me like a piano. Oh, I wonder if he plays the piano….I really do know nothing about him despite the interview…. Maybe if he comes back today, I can ask him but for now I'll just hug Bear. Actually, I think I'll call him CT bear and I think I'll go back to sleep. God I wish I could roll over, this position is so uncomfortable. Oh, I am so tired…
A while later as I wake up, before I open my eyes, I smile because I can feel the soft fur of CT Bear under my hand. Remembering the note, I rub my hand gently through his fur as a source of comfort but my eyes shoot open when CT Bear moves and I realise that I have just rubbed my hand through Christian's hair as he had laid his head on the edge of the bed. His laughing eyes sparkle and he chuckles as I blush and say, "Oh how embarrassing, I thought I was stroking CT Bear."
He says "CT Bear?" oh god, I wasn't going to tell him the C part so I go with distraction.
"Thank you for T Hardy Bear Mr Grey you appear to be a very accomplished fellow, who knew you could write poetry too?"
"I can do many things Miss Steele but I am very bad at watching those I care for suffer and I am even worse at apologising when I lose my temper." He pauses and then asks sincerely with big puppy dog eyes "Are we ok?" Yay, he said "we". I decide I will ask for one thing before I accept his implied apology.
"Well, we will be if I can give you the hug you desperately need – even Bear knows you need one" and it's there, the hesitation and then I realise it, the fear flashes across his eyes and I know, whatever his wounds are, they go deeper than mine.
"But if that is too hard for you, I'm sorry Mr Grey, you are going to have to come clean to me sooner rather than later why you are more damaged than I am and how in this universe our damage has now become intertwined when I didn't know you just 2 days ago. I am embarrassed to admit I am probably one of the few people in the universe who did not know who you were but I'm afraid I am feeling like you are a bit of a raging river and I am a bit of flotsam that has simply been pulled into the maelstrom that is your life. If I can't have a hug, can you give a timeline of an explanation? Which one is harder for you?
I see him struggling with an answer then I see him go to humour to distract – ha, he is talking to the queen of distraction techniques, I'll let him go there for a bit but he is not getting away without the answer. "Are you sure you don't want to intern for me? You are both intelligent and a good negotiator oh and beyond that you have a bit of a temper to boot!"
"Umm you forgot something else, I am quite tenacious and I'd like an answer, will it be a hug or an explanation?" I say to indicate that the distraction won't work.
He has the grace to look uncomfortable but then he says "Hang on, a minute ago it was a timeline of an explanation and now you want the explanation?"
"Well keep stalling and I will ask for both" I say with a laugh but he is looking so uncomfortable and when a nurse enters the room to look at my bandages, the discussion is over and I see him breathe out, goodness this is really worrying him. I give him a pat on the hand, a small shake of the head and a smile and he nods and wanders out of the room to allow some privacy.
The nurse checks everything is as expected then asks if I'd like help to change as visiting hours are about to start and I realise I might as well dress in the clothes Carla brought in so that I look respectable and it makes me feel better and I am ready to see everyone although I'd like to speak to Christian alone. He however is hovering outside and I realise I don't have a means of contacting him and ask the nurse if she minds calling him in and she does so and then leaves us alone again.
He comes in like a teenager in trouble and I smile sadly at him, I didn't realise it was going to be such a big deal and say, "Christian, it's ok, I'm letting it go, you are off the hook. Here, I am giving Bear a hug and now if you give him one, you'll have your hug" and his eyes dance with amusement and some other expression and he reaches out for CT Bear and gives him a huge squishing hug.
He then kisses Bear's nose and hands him back to me but says "Nah, he's not kissing you, I'm doing that myself" and he kisses me on the same spot on my nose as I giggle and cuddle the bear. For a second he looks wistfully at the bear and then he says "Now that you are getting better, I thought you might be wanting to do more than lie in bed and stress about your finals but I know you can't really study yet so here, I hope you enjoy this." And he hands me a brand new iPad and then "I don't know what happened to your phone but I'd like you to be able to contact me securely whenever you need to, and I don't think I can stay here with you every minute of the day" and under his breath he says "even if it's where I want to be" so here is an iPhone – my details are on it and you can email me from the iPad too if that is easier, the accounts have all been set up for you.
I look at the iPad as though it is going to bite me and he says "Here let me show you how to use it before everyone comes in" and he proceeds to swipe his finger and show me all the icons on the screen.
A kindle app, iBooks, a collection of songs, he shrugs apologetically and says, I don't know what music you like so I have put some of my favourites on it, like this new favourite of mine Wanted by Hunter Hayes but keep looking at what's on the iPad.
My eyes nearly pop out of my head at the next icon. As he clicks on it he is grinning like a Cheshire cat, it is the British Library collection and he says, "Go on, touch that icon, it won't bite" and as I do, another menu appears, it's the Historical Collection. Scrolling down, I select Novels of the 18th and 19th Century.
I am beyond stunned, he's bought me the British Library at a touch of a button. "How did you know?" I whisper, really overwhelmed by the present and so grateful but I can't seem to control my emotions at this point and start crying. "It's too much, you barely know me, we haven't even had a single normal conversation yet, I don't know what you like, I've never told you what I like or even anything about me but you have managed to give me the one present that means the most to me when all those that do know me and are supposed to love me …." And I can't finish the sentence for the sobs that rise unbidden and I bury my face in CT Bear's fur, grateful for a place to hide. I try desperately to stop crying because the hiccupping sobs cause the pain from the cracked ribs to radiate through my entire torso.
I gradually start to relax as I feel my hair being stroked and my face being turned gently away from CT Bear and into the crook of Christian's neck. He coos into my ear "Ana honey, just calm down, you need to stop crying, it's not good for you. I didn't mean to upset you. Can you calm down for me please?" I can't hear everything he is saying but I catch a quiet "Otherwise it means that I am hurting you again and it seems that's all I've done to you today" and he softly kisses and smooths my hair and rubs little circles on my back.
The warmth radiating from his arms around me, his words and his gentle ministrations all eventually work to calm me down and I can't let him get away with putting more blame back on himself so I finally say a shaky thank you to which he kisses my hair again and a slightly tighter hug. And then I say "See, I knew I'd get my hug finally today," and am rewarded by him pulling away and giving me an amused shake of his head and a smile that reaches his eyes and then he pulls me close again.
As I am revelling in the feel of his arms around me, he leans in again to give me a heavenly kiss like this morning but this time his parents don't burst into the room and catch us and I allow myself to relax into it, feeling the fireworks go off in the back of my brain.
It's like all the romantic novels I've ever read didn't ready me for this magnificent moment and I moan into his mouth giving his tongue an opening. His answering growl reverberates through his chest as my tongue tentatively attempts to stroke his moving around my mouth in a revering dance of exploration. Even without the casts, iv tubes and disgusting catheter tubes keeping me in place, I couldn't move, I am completely caught in his spell and his arms holding me, his lips like pure gold and the tiny involuntary moans he is making are almost enough to make me spontaneously combust.
He wants me, Christian Grey, gorgeous successful businessman and philanthropist, most beautiful specimen of the male species wants me, and I, clumsy Ana Steele who has only ever been kissed twice, who has never dated and has only ever dared dream, desperately want him.
Just as I feel like I am going to melt completely, he pulls away and gasps "God, I'm sorry Ana" and then rests his forehead against mine breathing heavily "I just can't think when I'm near you."
I shakily try to get my voice under control "Then don't. You're doing everything right so don't apologise."
I watch the expressions flit across his face, wonderment, confusion, anger, sadness and he leans forward and buries his face into my shoulder as he holds me in an almost painful grip and I hear a muffled "I don't deserve you."
Since one arm is in a sling and the other is caught under him, I can't do anything other than nuzzle my nose into his hair and say "Why don't you let me be the judge of that?" and I kiss his ear lobe. The reaction is almost instantaneous and his lips are back on mine, claiming hungrily until he seems to calm and they revert to the gentle ministrations of this morning, a revering, caressing kiss that warms me and worships me at the same time.