Seventy-Five
Whereabouts and Spray Bottles

"What do you mean, 'they'd be dead already'?" the girl identified as Yuffie asked. "What are you, a lifeline?"

"No, I'm just the one directing their lives," Reevee21 answered.

"So you're like their mother or something?" Yuffie questioned.

"Uuuum…" Reev stalled.

Suddenly, the book went into childhood-story form to describe exactly what happened next.

"REVEEEEE!" went the Pokémon that couldn't hold back their relief.

THUMPTHUDTHUMPTHUMPTHUPETYTHUMP went the various Pokémon bodies that slammed against Reevee21.

"GAIOW!" went Reevee21—muffled under all her characters.

"WHAT THE HECK?!" went most of the people in the room.

"Guys?!" Percy gasped.

"Percy, Zelda, Agumon, Pit, Reevee! YOU'RE ALIIIIIVE!" Serperior laughed, constricting Zelda in a hug.

"Guys! YOU'RE ALL ALIIIIIVE!" Agumon laughed back, running to Treeko with his arms wide open.

Treeko, overtaken by Minecraft instincts at the fact that Agumon looked like a charging zombie, grabbed Agumon's wrists when he was close enough and flipped him onto his back.

Agumon coughed a few ashes, going limp on the floor.

"Sora? Do you have something to do with…this?" Leon asked, gesturing to the dogpile. Pit was currently attempting to drag her out of it, only to be pulled in and hugged as well.

"Short answer, yes," Sora replied.

"And the long answer?"

"We got stuck in their book and were knocked unconscious by THAT ONE," Donald squawked, pointing a wavering finger at Rotom—who was messing with Aerith's bangs for some reason, "so we woke up, made our way through the air vents—"

"We have air vents?" Percy muttered to Zelda.

Zelda lifted her arms in a confused shrug.

"—which brought us to some room they call the 'narrating platform'," Donald continued, "and were attacked by a swarm of heartless—two of them can control them, by the way—"

"WHAT?!"

"And were sucked into a LAPTOP, which brought us here," the duck concluded.

"I only understood about half of that, what about you?" Agumon asked Cid.

"I think they're hallucinating," Cid hummed.

"How do ya hallucinate lighting striking ya?" Goofy argued.

"Lightning…?"

"Seriously, get off," Aerith huffed, swatting away Rotom.

"Baaaaaaaaaaangs…" Rotom drooled.

"ROTOM! Down, boy! DOWN!" Reevee21 ordered, free from the pile at last.

Rotom obediently sat on the floor, his arms in front of him like a dog, and panted.

"Hey, where's Zoroark? And Absol?" Pit asked.

"We have no idea," Quilava shrugged.

"Did you know they can control Heartless?!" Serperior asked.

"'Course," Reevee21 huffed. "I'm the author."

Kirlia suddenly stiffened and drew something behind her back.

In a flash, she kneed Reevee in the chest—knocking her to the ground—and kept it there while aiming her keyblade at her throat.

"I swear," She hissed, "if you weren't my author and be the sole purpose of my existence, I would cut your heart out, FEED IT TO THE HEARTLESS, STALK YOUR NOBODY, AND THEN HANG HER BY HER THUMBS for what you PUT US THROUGH!"

"Kirlia!" Charizard scolded.

"Hey, is that…?" Sora trailed at the sight of her keyblade.

Kirlia threw it into the portal—once again being in the wall—and got off Reevee21. Not a second later, her keyblade landed on Sora, causing him to fall to the floor—unconscious, again.

"So it's YOU!" Donald shouted. "It's YOU who owns that keyblade! Kairi gave it twenty bucks in hope it would leave Sora alone!"

"Kairi gave me a twenty?" Kirlia repeated disbelievingly.

Yuffie approached the keyblade and peeled off a twenty-dollar bill that was taped to it.

"Oh. Sweet!" Kirlia smiled.

Meanwhile, in an unnamed location…

Zoroark and Absol were both dangling by their feet off the ceiling, held bound by chains, in some sort of dungeon-like room.

"This sucks," Zoroark sighed, her ponytail dangling below her.

"Chains in general suck," Absol added, his four legs tied together and being hung on a chain.

"Dungeons suck, too," Zoroark added, gesturing to the walls around her.

"Can't forget being kidnapped. That REALLY sucks," Absol stated.

"People who kidnap other people who order them around suck," Zoroark injected.

"Cheap Pokémon rip-offs are bad for your health. They suck," Absol growled.

"Raisin cookies suck the most," Zoroark said.

"Life sucks."

"Yea….hey, can't you just saw through those chains?"

Absol blinked, then reached his head up to start sawing off the chain, so he can be FREE!

SPIIRT!

"GUAH!"

Demyx appeared in the doorway, armed with a spray bottle aimed at Absol.

"YOU JERK!" Absol sobbed, soaking wet.

"DEMYX, YOU SUCK, TOO!" Zoroark roared.

"I don't suck, you suck for letting yourselves get captured by Axel!" Demyx argued.

"YOU suck for being a Nobody!" Zoroark shouted.

"YOU suck for NOT being a Nobody!" Demyx retorted, jabbing a finger at her chest. "The Heartless don't come after you then!"

"Water sucks!"

"Darkness sucks!"

"Heartless suck!"

"Axel sucks!"

"Overprotective older brothers suck!"

"Under protective Nobody leaders suck!"

Demyx and Zoroark paused, the only sound in the room being Absol trying to shake his fur dry.

"Dude…are we on the same side now?" Zoroark blinked.

"Duuuuude…what the heck just happened?" Demyx drawled.

"…BEING AGAINST EACH OTHER SUCKS!"

"RIVALS SUCK!"

"RIVALRY SUCKS!"

"ENEMIES ARE ABSOL-UTE SUCKERS!"

"AND BACKSTABBERS ARE EVEN WORSE!"

"WILL YOU TWO SHUUUUUT UUUUUP?!" Xaldin roared, stomping into the room. "I can HEAR YOU from the HALLWAY!"

"THE HALLWAY IS RIGHT THERE!" Demyx groaned, pointing out the door.

"THESE ARE TEN-INCH-THICK CONCRETE WALLS!" Xaldin declared, pointing to a wall. "ARGUING SUCKS, PRISONERS SUCK, AND GUARDS OF PRISONERS SUCK! NOW GO TO BED, YA ISMONIACS!"

Xaldin promptly stormed out of the room, leaving Absol, Zoroark, and Demyx to ponder his thoughts.

"…soooo…you guys hungry? I'm hungry," Demyx asked.

Axel: I have nothing to say.

Demyx: You just said something.

Axel: Meh.

Demyx: Thanks for reading our EPIC argument, readers! …oh yea, there was another part, too—I don't care. Be sure to leave a review on what you think, click that follow/favorite button on your way out!

Zoroark: No, HIT IT WID A GUITAR! *Grabs Sitar, smashes against Follow/Favorite button*

Demyx: MY WEAPON!

Axel: How did you get out?!

Absol: YOU LEFT THE DOOR OPEN.

Axel: Demyyyyyyx…

Demyx: *Holding Sitar remains* Whaaaat? They're some friends of mine! Well, Absol is, anyway.

Absol: NO I AM NOT.

Demyx: Oh come on, you spray a cat ONE TIME—

Axel: Just…close the A/N, will you? I can't take this.

Zoroark: *Wiggles finger* nu-uh, you haven't done something yet!

Axel: No.

Zoroark: Oh come on—

Axel: NO…

Absol: Will you just do it?

Demyx and Zoroark: Do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, DO IT—

Axel: HUG AN EEVEE! THERE, I SAID IT! SHUT UP, YOU TWO!

Demyx and Zoroark: YAAAAAAAAAAAAY!