"Hey look, it's Reevee21. That's weird, I thought she was dead."

You have a good reason to believe that I died. But personally, I also have good reason to be dead on the Pokémon archive! I've got a HUGE load of other projects to do, letting this fic sit around and gather dust for that time!

"But we don't want it to gather dust! WE WANT IT TO LIVE!"

I know, I know. You can count on two things, alright? One is a guest chapter being done by me and a good friend of mine, The One Named Light, and the other is a massive, multi-chapter adventure involving Doritos.

"That's great, when will they be published? Hey, can we make suggestions too?!"

Heck yea! I'm actually needing some good ideas, and you guys have been neglecting to send me some! It takes a lot of people to make a random fic, you know. And about that first part: I'm still thinking it through, and I need to watch an episode of iCarly before I can post the guest chapter.

"iCarly?"

iCarly.

Percy: ...why are you talking to your fist?

(Turns away from face painted on fist) ...please tell me you didn't just overhear me talking to myself.

Eighty-Three
Bold Disease

"LET'S PLAY SUM WIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!" Zoroark cheered.

"U betcha!" Serperior laughed. "…GET IT?! 'CAUSE WE HAVE A WII U?!"

"Yea, sure, makes sense," Flygon shrugged.

"Why are YOU playing this? Aren't you lacking opposable thumbs?" Serperior asked, leaning towards Flygon.

"Serperior…we're ALL lacking opposable thumbs," Flygon stated.

"…oh."

"You know, some people are calling the Wii U new Virtual Boy," Zoroark stated.

Suddenly, Luxio was in her face. "WE DON'T TALK 'BOUT THAT VIRTUAL BOY NO MORE. WE'VE MATURED, WE'VE MOVED ON…NOW LET'S JUST FORGET ABOUT IT, AND LET'S JUST KEEP IT THAT WAY."

"Okay," Zoroark squeaked, hiding under a pillow.

"Wow, that's…a lot of bold," Flygon squinted. "You feeling alright, buddy?"

"Hm? Yea, I slept well last night. Why?" Luxio stated in his booming, echoing voice.

"EEP!" Serperior shrieked.

"Hey, what's with all the bold over here?!" Quilava shouted, sauntering over. "Did Reevee possess someone again?"

"When did Reevee possess someone in the first place?" Luxio deadpanned. "And I certainly am not possessed, or I would have found myself a Celestial Bronze Pencil right now. Then I would be savin' up for one of those New Nintendo 3DS systems, Cyan colored, and get myself a Kid Icarus: Uprising game, and play it all night long! Then I'd go and write a fanfiction about it—"

Be quiet, you're exposing my personal life!

"Okay, so Reev's the narrator. Hence, she's not possessing Luxio," Flygon hummed, jabbing a finger towards Luxio as he continued ranting about my habits…really…embarrassing…habits…

"Am I the only one who's imagining him with a Mother Brain voice right now?" Zoroark asked.

Yup.

"Aw…"

"Hey, you!" Serperior called, pointing a tail-tip at the narrating platform.

Reevee21 opened a trap door to the platform and shouted down, "yea?!"

"You're the author, explain this guy's problem!" Serperior demanded, holding Luxio up.

"Just because I'm the author doesn't mean I know what's going on all the time!" Reevee21 argued. "And what's the fun in that?!" She slammed the trapdoor shut.

"…jerk," Serperior muttered.

I HEARD THAT!

"Easy ladies, let's not get ourselves into a catfight now~" Luxio purred.

"…now I'm hearing him like the Black Night from Ike's game," Zoroark hummed.

"Eww," Serperior shivered.

"What? What's 'eww'?" Zoroark asked.

"You're hearing him as a murderer…"

"…eww…"

Flygon face-clawed at the antics before Quilava cleared his throat.

"How about…we go and see a doctor," he suggested.

"Mm, sounds good, but doesn't our local nurse—Nurse Joy—know about our antics? And say she did through a suspicious way? I don't think the author would trust her with us," Luxio argued. "And then I'll be talking like Reevee21…or Mother Brain…or whoever this Black Knight guy is for the rest of my life! Wait, Pokémon can't die. Can't they? And wait, aren't all nights black? Why do they need to specify that guy as the black night? It's kind of redundant, I mean, I guess there's star-lit nights—"

"SHUT UUUUUUUUP," Fennekin moaned, dragging her face down the table.

"…what the heck are you doing?" Frogadier croaked, seeing how she was using Froakie-shaped pieces in some weird game of chess…if chess had bear traps, flamethrowers, and tiny swords attached to one team's pieces…

"Just, uh…uh…testing this game!" Fennekin declared, putting on a fake smile.

Frogadier squinted at her harshly before shrugging it off and putting his headset back on.

Ten minutes later, at Nurse Joy's office…

"Okay, we totally didn't just break the laws of physics and the universe by exiting our PC box to get to the Pokémon center," Flygon sighed.

Quilava, Flygon, Zoroark, Serperior, and Luxio were all patiently standing by in the waiting room, sitting (or squishing, in Flygon's case) on ordinary chairs amongst ordinary people.

A nearby trainer looked at them funny.

"…'sup," Zoroark waved.

The trainer promptly ran off, screaming something about "THE POKEMON ARE TALKING!"

Suddenly, a nurse opened the door to Nurse Joy's office. "Uh...Luxio?" she called out.

"That would be meeeee," Luxio waved.

The nurse took him back, leaving the other four to wait longer.

"…we could totally go and find our trainer right now," Serperior noted.

"…meeeeeh," everyone shrugged.

Meanwhile, in the halls of Nurse Joy's offices…

Luxio timidly walked behind the nurse, giving every inch of the place frightened looks. There was the banging of metal, the zapping of electricity, even the occasional scream of a Pokémon…

"…this place is weird…" he whimpered.

"Right this way!" the nurse said cheerfully, shoving him through an open door. It turned out to be an operation room, with Nurse Joy in a surgical mask nearby…

"…*gulp*," Luxio swallowed nervously.

Back in the waiting room…

Random elevator music began to play as the Pokémon sat; Quilava was asleep and drooling, Flygon was twiddling his claws, Serperior was engrossed in a fashion magazine, and Zoroark was playing a DS.

"…will you quit that?!" Serperior hissed at the elevator sitting nearby.

"Okaaaay," the elevator groaned sadly. It took ground-shaking, two-by-two steps to the empty elevator shaft before jumping down and declaring, "HAWT SPREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENG!"

A huge splash soaked the hallway.

"…I…didn't just see that," Serperior blinked, dumbfounded.

One hour later…

Finally, Luxio was returned back to them with a startled look on his face.

"AHA! You're alive!" Zoroark declared.

"How's your voice now?" Quilava asked.

"…Well, it's better than nothing," Luxio shrugged.

"AUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH," the other four Pokémon groaned.

And they lived happily ever after!

Percy: I swear, I thought you had died about a week ago.

Meh, finishing A Smasher's World took its tool.

Blapi: Yea, I rem—WHAT IN THE NAME OF HECK?!

You like it?! It's the Japanese word for Pittoo!

Blapi: Oh, so you CROSS LANGUAGE BORDERS just to TAUNT ME. CHANGE IT BACK THIS INSTANT.

What if I don't want to because I like it?!

Blapi: (Puts knife to Reevee21's throat) you will change it.

(Quickly changes name back)

Dark Pit: That's better.

I actually typed Pittoo there because I'm a traitor but changed it back. HAHA! Anywho, thanks for reading, guys! Be sure to review, follow, and favorite, you're support's the only thing that keeps this fic from going out at this point! Hug-

Agumon: QUICK, ZELDA, GIVE A SPEECH BEFORE SHE ENDS IT!

Zelda: (Deep inhale) A Mary Sue, also known as Gary Stu for male instances, is the term used for a character who has no flaws or disabilities at all. The name originates from a character known as Mary Sue from a Star Trek fan work, quote, "the youngest Lieutenant in the fleet — only fifteen and a half years old", end quote. They are often said to be a beautiful, smart, cunning, rich, kick-butt, romantic mess of teenage dreams by us video game characters, and are highly annoying for their absolute spoiling of a fanfiction or other fan work. Greater instances involve the characters being the daughters/sons of actual characters, having excess abilities that make absolutely no sense, transforming into other creatures, random powers the author of the work fails to explain, and dying and coming back to life multiple times. Mary Sues can lead to vomiting rainbows, complete "What The Actual Heck", failure of communication between eyes and brain, face-keyboarding, face-desking, face-laptoping, face-planting, face-walling, and good ol' face-palming. Near all Mary Sues are female, notable examples being Sara and/or Ebony, and are normally found in fics where grammar is nonexistent. The only true weakness they have is flames from reviewers, and these flames rarely work against the creators themselves as they continue to have adventure after adventure of their awful, hideous creations.

Pit: You just said a 219-word-speech about how much you hate Mary Sues.

Zelda: Yes. Yes I did. (Collapses onto sofa) And it was exhausting.

Well, we're all a bit more informed, if not disgusted by now. You guys hug your Eevee, I'm going to be vomiting rainbows over the side of the platform… (Runs to edge of Narrating Platform)