When Cara woke up the next morning, she winced as she felt the freshly formed bruises on her shoulder. Straining her neck to get a better look, she could see the exact point where he had pushed his fingers into her skin. Her encounter with Ben, Kylo, whoever he had been at the time had left a lasting impression; and not just a physical one.
She had finally realized that she could possibly, someday, sway him back to the Light. It would be no easy feat, and it would most likely take months rather than days, but she would never quit. No matter what happened to her.
She could say that she was doing it for unselfish reasons, such as that she wanted to give General Organa her son back, the woman who had taken her in and been unfathomably kind to her as Cara was growing up. She could say that she wanted to see Ben safely returned to the arms of his father, the man who had shown her the true potential of the galaxy. She could say she was only doing it for Ben, because it was the right thing to do, and although all those reasons were also true, she would be lying to herself. She also wanted to do it because she missed her friend; and she needed him now more than ever.
There was no plan that she could make, no specific action she could take that would get him to come back to her. She could tell that his anger was rooted deep within him; he was angry at his parents for sending him away, angry that they would never listen to him, angry that they never told him the truth of his heritage. They had done it all to protect him. If only they could have known how much they had already hurt him by whispering behind his back whenever they thought he could not hear them.
Their encounter yesterday had been a blur of emotions, pain, revelations and hope. The one thing that she remembered better than anything was that he had finally admitted that he remembered her. He remembered that she was stubborn, he remembered that she was persistent and would fight for whatever it was she believed in. She hoped that he realized that she believed in him. She hoped that he realized that she would never stop fighting for him.
Cara knew that she needed to understand the reasons why he had been swayed to the dark side. Ben had always been irrational and temperamental, sure. He had a knack for flares of anger and impatience that was not becoming. He may have been all of those things, but he was not a man who was easily manipulated. For as long as she had known him, he had never let anyone tell him what to do. Whoever was doing this to him, whoever had brought him over to the Dark side, was a sheer trickster.
She was suddenly reminded of a time when they had been eleven years old, and she had tried to convince him to train her in the art of combat. Even if he had caved six years later when they were teenagers, it had taken an enormous amount of convincing on her part to get him to train her. He was adamant that there was no point in teaching her – he was worried that she would get hurt, that she would feel somehow inferior to his skills, that she would not understand the principles behind the fighting. In his own way, he had been right. If he had started to instruct her at such a young age, she probably would not have appreciated the subtext of each sparring session and fight. She would not have understood his passion for combat. It was more than just an offensive technique and a defensive shield for him. It was his strength. It provided his sense of self.
Even now, she could see his unique talent for combat in the way he wielded his lightsaber, in the way his weapon arced through the air gracefully even when he was lost in a haze of fury. She could see it in the obvious distinctive craftsmanship he had used to forge his weapon.
Her door was opened abruptly as a Stormtrooper came in to bring her food. It was accompanied by a pleasant smell, and she quickly recognized which Stormtrooper it was that was bringing her breakfast.
"Wait!" She said, before he could quickly exit her cell again. He turned around, his body language betraying his confusion.
"I would thank you again for the food, but I think you already know that I appreciate it." She said, smiling at him.
The soldier said nothing, but she wanted him to stay. It was nice to have company that was not trying to kill her, torture her or make her feel emotionally inferior. She noticed that he had not tried to leave yet, either. Not after her outburst, anyway.
"I've recently learned that the faces that hide behind masks often aren't nearly as scary as you think they might be."
"Do you mean Kylo Ren?" She was surprised by his question.
"Yes, I do."
"Are you trying to tell me that he doesn't scare you?"
"No, he still does."
"Then what are you saying?"
"I'm saying that sometimes the masks and the faces behind them are not the things that haunt you. It's someone's actions towards you that can haunt you." She said, unable to explain why she was so willing to express her feelings towards this stranger.
"Which means…"
"Why do you keep that mask on when it's obvious you don't want to wear it?"
"You can tell?" He asked, a nervous tremor in his voice.
"Yes."
He quickly took his helmet off – not bothering to take it off slowly, the way Ren did. There was no reason to, he did not need to intimidate her.
The first thing she noticed was that he had a friendly face; kind eyes that betrayed his confusion as to his current position. She could tell that he did not want to be there, as much as she did not want to be there. At least, as much as she used to not want to be there.
"Do you want to escape?"
"Yea – yes. Yes, I do." He said, sounding surer of himself with every syllable.
"So why don't you try?" She asked. There was something about him that made her want to help him.
"I can't. There's no pilot that can help me."
"I'm sorry." She said, genuinely meaning it.
"So am I."
The tortured look on his face was one she had seen many times before. Conflict gleamed in his eyes, a look she had not only seen on herself often, but also on Ben. In a strange way, the Stormtrooper that stood in front of her reminded her of Ben, of Kylo Ren. They were opposites of course, but facing similar battles. Kylo Ren was determined to belong to the Dark Side, while FN-2187 was obviously wanting to move towards the light, eager to leave behind whatever it was he was trained to do.
She wished she could help him, the same way she wished she could help Ben. Maybe she just needed to give him a reason to believe that he could be good. Maybe they needed to help each other.
She was so tired – hours of rigorous medical training could do that to a person. Normally, she would have gone to find Ben and have dinner with him, but she could not find him anywhere. She had been so exhausted she had decided to forego dinner and go straight to bed. She would see him tomorrow.
She took her time getting ready for bed, her movements were slow and she had no energy left. Finally, she got into bed, quickly falling into a black pit of dreamless sleep.
A while later, she felt herself slip back into consciousness as she felt the space beside her on the mattress sink and the sheets she was lying under being ruffled. Her eyes fluttered open as she turned onto her other side to see who it was who had laid down next to her. Cara was not surprised to find it was Ben; his dark waves spreading out on the pillow beside her as his eyes regarded her sleepy expression.
"What are you doing here?" She whispered, her voice full of sleep.
"I didn't get the chance to see you today."
"That would not be the first time. What are you really doing here?"
"My father is leaving again. I heard them fighting."
Even in her sleepy state, she knew that he was talking about his parents. She sighed, knowing how much his parents arguing affected him; especially since he was usually the topic of discussion.
"I'm sorry."
"I know."
She smiled, aware that he had not even realized that he had just used his father's own catchphrase.
He turned his head away from her and closed his eyes. She could see his chest rising and falling slowly, and she wondered if he was planning on sleeping here. A blush crept up her cheeks at the thought, and she could see a smile sneak onto his face. Suddenly, she became angry with him. Had he just been invading her thoughts? He had been practicing more and more but he had promised to never use his power on her.
"Were you just listening to my thoughts?" She asked, her harsh tone making it hard for her to whisper.
"No." He said, quite obviously lying to her.
"Yes you were."
"Well, in case it makes you feel any better, I only do it when your thoughts seem to pertain to me."
Her cheeks became more flushed, her anger and embarrassment betrayed through her skin even though her room was lit only by the light of the moon.
He turned onto his side to regard her, their faces only mere inches apart. She studied his expression, hoping to see some manner of awkwardness etched onto his handsome features. They had known each other for eleven years, and yet even after all that time he was still somewhat impossible to read.
"So you decided to wake me up to tell me that you sometimes tend to invade my privacy?"
A small chuckle escaped his lips, and she could not help but smile at the sound. It was rare that she saw him so defenceless. So open.
"You know that is not why I woke you up."
"Then tell me why you did."
He said nothing, shifting his body instead as though he was waiting for her to break the silence first. She did not comply though, and simply held her tongue, waiting for him to answer.
"I just wanted to see you." He said, his reply barely audible. She would not have been able to hear him if he had not been so close.
"Okay." She said, at a loss for words. Her mind was becoming muddled as she could feel the heat from his body warming her every limb.
Without another word, he closed his eyes, and she was about to do the same until she felt his hand cover hers – it was a strange sensation, a combination of the surprisingly cold feeling of his skin and the tingling she felt whenever they touched. She could feel the callouses that revealed just how hard he trained, the dry skin that showed her that he often forgot to take care of himself.
"Glad I could help." She whispered, before falling back asleep.
When she woke up the next morning, neither of them had moved from their previous positions – the only change was that they had scooted even closer together, their foreheads resting against one another as the first rays of sunlight streamed in through her window.
Cara snapped out of her daydream, noticing that the friendly Stormtrooper was about to leave, his helmet covering his face one more.
"Could you help me with something?" She asked him quickly, and he turned to face her, shrugging his shoulders, demonstrating that he was somewhat interested in whatever it was she had to say.
"I need you to take me to Kylo Ren." She said, hoping that she would not scare him off.
"Are you – are you crazy? I can't just take you to him."
"I need you to take me to him."
"Why? Why would you voluntarily go see him?"
"Because I need to show him something."
A/N: A different time than I usually update, but I hope you guys enjoy the chapter, and thank you for all your kind words about the last one!