Christian's POV

Ana is determined to walk on those crutches tomorrow to her interviews so she has been practicing for these last two days, I think I'm aging at double the rate as I watch her and I know I am annoying her as she almost threatened to hit me with the crutch if I continued to hover. Yesterday I did go and buy her a helmet and she humoured me by putting it on but stayed in the great room and allowed me to help so that I know she didn't overstrain her body but she slept like a log so it must have taken a lot out of her and that worries me.

Today she is attempting a lot more, since waking up she has been intent on moving around this floor but when I pull out the bubble wrap she orders me from the room so I move everything out of the way and that annoys her even more. Why can't she see that I don't want her to hurt herself? In the end, she sits down and refuses to get off the bed until I have left the room and I do so in a huff, but just as I slam the door, I hear her whisper "echidna" and I am horrified that I'd already made her use her safe word, turning quickly and returning to the room I am kneeling at her feet saying "Honey, I'm sorry, talk to me" but she has already retreated, her face in her hands and she is shaking as she tries to hold the sobs.

"Oh honey, I'm sorry, I'm just so worried that you'll hurt yourself, I don't want you ending up in hospital again with a worse injury," I say quietly, undoing the strap of the helmet and turning her so that she is curled up on my lap. I am so not used to worrying like this about someone, yes I looked after the subs needs and made sure that they were ok after a scene but I didn't have anything invested in their happiness, now I can't breathe properly if Ana isn't happy, especially if it is because of something I have done.

"Christian, you do know I am going to make missteps and I am going to hurt myself and hopefully not too many other people around me?" and she looks at me for a reaction but before I can respond she continues, "You know I am not just talking about using the crutches?" And she looks at me to make sure I'm following, ok, I thought she was just talking about the crutches.

"I mean in life, you can't protect me from everything, I will make decisions that you won't like, that I won't like after the event but they will be my best decision at the time, I won't deliberately do stupid things but you would have made missteps along the way, please give me the space to do them as well, just so that I learn. You only learn from your mistakes and I will listen to you, I promise, I will listen to you but I need to be able to try and do things by myself. Can you do that?" It's a tortured look that she bestows on me and I have to go against everything my brain is screaming at me.

"I can do that but I will catch you if you fall and I will try to help, just keep telling me when it's too much and I'll try to step back quietly, I just don't want you hurt and why would I let you do something bad if I know what is going to happen?" I don't know how to make her understand but if she wants to do that, I will but her security is so important to me that I don't care if she doesn't want to be supported, she will be; I'll just have to make sure I do it without her knowing.

My statement seems to mollify her a little and she looks at me questioningly, "Talking about catching when falling, how are you feeling today, how are your …um... bits?"

"I think there's some swelling." I say deadpan and Ana looks horrified, "I think he needs some closer inspection and perhaps a kiss to make it better although I think that is going to make the swelling worse."

And then she gets it, blushes on cue and starts giggling and she feathers her fingers down my chest and hesitates as she reaches my lap, where my "injury" is swelling to the point that it is almost bulging out of my pyjama bottoms.

"I know what would make it better," she whispers huskily and my breath intake is a dead giveaway of what I am thinking and she continues, "Ice."

"Ice?" I don't think I can hide the incredulity and disbelief in my voice and she dissolves into a huge fit of giggles.

"Yep, ice will reduce the swelling."

I'll give her ice! I'll need to swallow a lot to cool myself down after that little interplay but instead I grin at her, "No ice but I have an idea. Young lady, you're coming with me, you've been getting all sweaty practicing on those crutches, you need a shower" and I grab her into my arms as she continues to giggle and I carry her into the shower, turning on the shower she squeals as the cold water hits us.

"Yep" to use her word, "Yep this will help with the swelling" I say as she tries to bury herself in my chest to get away from the cold water until it starts to warm and she relaxes, oh bad, I didn't think this through…

"I am known for my control, I am known for my control" I repeat in my brain and try to relay that internally but all that happens is that my brain focusses on the body part that is just not co-operating as Ana slides down my body, effectively impaling herself.

"Oh"

And then she wraps her good leg around my waist and buries her face in my shoulder, I am so close to release that I know my laboured breathing must be roaring in her ear.

"Can I help you with that?" I hear timidly and I just clasp her tighter.

"Ana, baby, I am going to need to put you down because this isn't good for your pelvis or your ribs," I say trying to sound rational while all I actually want to do is bury myself in her.

"I don't care about my pelvis or my ribs, I care about you," she says as she unwraps her leg and again slides down onto me and this time she grinds and I can feel her heat through the shower wetness and I moan as she lifts her face to me, her lips finding mine and opening to allow me entry.

I shift and then hold her with one arm around her back, my knee on the seat holding her in place and as I plunder her mouth, I snake one hand down and into her shorts, finding the sweet spot and apply the pressure she was grinding to receive. Watching as her face reflects her wonder, I balance her on my knee as I lower my mouth and suckle through the nightie now sticking to her gorgeous body, trying to gauge when I will need both hands to stabilise her and am completely taken as her body reacts naturally to me and as she starts keening quietly, I return to those luscious lips and swallow her cries as I hold her tight against me to make sure she doesn't damage herself any further.

When the last of her spasms have concluded and I lean back to see her face, it's to a look of guilt and she moves her hands to the top of my pants and it's me that breaks away although it's the last thing I want to do, "I can't Ana, I was listening to the doctor and I don't want to cause you any damage, do you not have any self-preservation in you?" and I am surprised at how upset she is.

"I want to do something for you, I can't just keep taking," she all but sobs at me as the tears start rolling down her cheeks.

I squat down in front of her, the water still pouring over my shoulder and put my hands on her shoulders, "Oh honey, orgasms don't come with a tally board, you didn't take, you gave more than you know, let me help you undress and then you and I are actually having this shower," I am going to have to work really hard to convince Ana to accept anything from me but I refuse to count giving her pleasure amongst the gifts that she thinks she's taking. I have a plan and I hope she feels better after it as I help her out of her sodden clothes and strip off my own.

I am at half-mast when I turn back to her with a washcloth and body wash having adjusted the water and say "Would you be able to wash him as I haven't dared look since the injury, I don't want to know."

At her gasp though I look down and I realise the plan may have backfired, "Oh Christian, look what I did to you," she says pointing to the bruise that is spreading across my groin, looking upset and guilty, she gently touches me and I am straight back to full mast and when she bites her lip, I almost explode.

"Just hands honey, anything else will hurt you, and we have our future in front of us, just hands." I whisper as I watch the cogs turning. I can tell she's never done this because she looks like she doesn't know where to start so I take her hand and wrap my fingers over hers saying quietly, "Like this," and move my hand up and down and her fingers tighten around me. The shower is set on a gentle warm spray cocooning us, "Ah, that's right, baby, you are doing it perfectly," I say and release her hand, leaving her to continue as I flex my hips into her hands, she grabs me harder and I can't stop the groan as the pain of the injury and the pleasure of it being Ana's gentle hands on me, meld into one.

My release when it comes is representative of the fact that I have been lying next to the most beautiful girl in the world for three weeks and not been able to do anything about it and the look of shock and wonder on Ana's face would have had me laughing if I'd had any energy left.

Instead I collapse onto the seat next to Ana and pull her onto me and bury my tongue in her mouth, thanking her in a way that leaves no doubt that she has just given way, way more than I have given her. Ana's shy smile when she resurfaces is beautiful and I kiss her eyes, her cheeks, her nose, I just need to feel her and make her realise that I understand how huge that was for her and how amazing it was for me.

I turn her on my lap, take the shampoo and turn the shower onto a heavier massaging setting and gently wash her hair as she moans quietly, I lift her up and hug her as I do so then using the wash cloth and the body wash, I wash every part of her, gently, nothing sexual just a clean and then she takes the cloth and reciprocates and we simply luxuriate in each other.

Finally stepping out of the shower, I wrap an enormous fluffy bath sheet around Ana and a smaller one around her hair, stopping just to wrap one around my waist, I carry her back to the bed, returning to retrieve a hair dryer and brush and work to dry her hair, brushing her hair until the waves are lying just so on her back and framing that gorgeous face.

"Thank you Christian," it's no more than a whisper but it wends its way around the last ice shards that surround my heart and they melt and she owns me heart and soul and it just feels right.