Cara had not thought it would be this hard to know he was gone. He had left her alone for days at a time before – and she would feel a burning desire to see him, even if it was just to know that he was still there. Now, though, she knew that he was gone, and she had no hope that she would see him for a while. She knew that he was off somewhere, in the galaxy, without her. Off on some planet that they had promised to explore together, no doubt. Performing unspeakable acts that he would never tell her about just so that she would be able to deny them. Just so that he could continue to get under her skin.
She knew that Kylo Ren was still manipulating her, just as much as she was manipulating him. She realized that he thought she was some sort of means to an end – to what end, she did not know. She realized that she was getting under his skin, as well, as much as he may refute that fact. The more she seemed to get through to him however, the harder he pushed back. It was a frustrating cycle, one that did not seem to have any sort of happy ending in store. The worst part was that Cara knew that she would never be able to forget about him now. If she ever escaped, if she ever got rescued, she would never be able to forget. She would never be able to forget the angry glaze in his eyes, the way he trembled when he was livid, the way he shouted at his underlings or the way he had hurt her physically. She would never forget, and yet she would never be able to forgive herself if she left him in the state he was in.
He knew this, of course. She knew that he knew this. It was infuriating, because she knew that he would use her unwillingness to forgive herself against her someday. It was infuriating because she knew Kylo Ren would be capable of doing so. It was even more infuriating because she knew Ben Solo had sometimes preyed on her good nature to get his way as well – even if it was in a much less sinister manner.
Her head hurt. She was sleeping too much to pass the time and eating too little because it was easy to forget. Whenever she was awake, all she could think about was what she would say the next time she saw him. How she would feel. What she would do. He made her unpredictable. He had done so when they were children, and he still had that effect on her now.
There was no position in which she was comfortable. Every bone in her body ached, every muscle was stiff, until she finally gave up sitting on her small bench and opted to lie down on the cold metal floor instead. There was nothing she could do now. All she had was waiting. Waiting for a man she knew wholeheartedly and yet barely seemed to know at all to come see her.
Her door opened, and she did not even bother looking up to see who had come in. It dawned on her that it was an irregular time for a visitor, however. She had just been served another meagre meal a little while ago. Whoever it was, she would not give them the satisfaction of her curiosity.
"General Hux would like a word." It was the now familiar distorted voice of a Stormtroopers helmet, and yet it did not belong to the only other person on this ship – planet – that she would want to see.
"If he wants to see me, nobody is stopping him." She said, somehow retaining hope that this soldier would just leave her be.
"He would like to see you somewhere that is a little less destroyed."
She could tell that the Stormtrooper was repeating his General's words – they sounded like the kind of sarcastic, irritating remark that Hux would make. The kind of words that made her skin crawl.
"He would like to see me now that he knows Kylo Ren will not come in to stop him."
The Stormtrooper grabbed her forcefully by her arm and hauled her on her feet. She gave no resistance, but she gave no assistance either. Her body was as limp as it could possibly be. He dragged her by her feet out the door, pushing her to walk faster as he led her down the same way that FN-2187 had shown her when he had taken her to the bridge. She could feel her heart rate rising, nerves suddenly setting in as she realized the truth of her own words. Kylo Ren would not be there to stop him now. Ben would not be there to stop Hux from hurting her.
The Stormtrooper stopped abruptly, hauling open a door and shoving her inside. The room was dark, the only light coming from the switches on the control panels in the corner of the room. There was no small window in the door, nor one that gave her a glimpse outside to the stars – not like in her cell – and she briefly wondered why Kylo Ren had not just locked her in here. If he truly hated her, he should have. She would have gone mad if she had to have been locked away in such constant darkness.
"I thought you would enjoy a change of scenery." Hux's voice was already familiar to her, even though she had really only heard it twice. It was the type of voice you would not soon forget. The type of voice that was constantly laced with a tremor of anger and a hint of malevolence.
"You thought wrong." She was not lying – she would much rather be lying on the cold floor of her cell than squinting at him through the darkness. His pale skin was almost luminescent in the dark room – a ghostly shade of white that made him look even more sinister that usual.
"Kylo Ren is not here to protect you now."
"I am aware."
"And yet you do not seem to be worried."
"Perhaps you do not frighten me as much as you'd like to think."
He scoffed, as though he had never heard anything less believable in his entire life. She truly hated this man – she felt no remorse for him at this moment.
"It would seem you have gotten rather adept at lying since the last time we spoke." He said.
"Or it is just easier to speak the truth around you."
"Are there people on this ship that it is not easy for you to speak the truth around?"
She knew what he was getting at. It was the only reason he seemed to be interested in her. Her relationship with Ben – her acquaintance with Kylo Ren.
"Wouldn't you like to know."
"Yes, I would,' he stepped closer to her, and she could now see how his lips were pulled into a tight line and that his eyes were darker than she remembered, 'You see, I know that you are vital. Vital to the success of the First Order. Vital to the success of Kylo Ren working on the orders of Supreme Leader Snoke. Vital to the completion of his training, somehow. And yet, as vital as you seem to be, you also seem to be standing in the way. You are holding him back. You are important to him. Important to him as an individual, not as part of a greater scheme."
She listened intently, hoping that he would say something that would give her an extra clue as to how Ben, or Kylo Ren, viewed her. She needed to know.
"Your point being?" She asked, trying to hide her interest. She did not want to give him a reason to keep her here longer than necessary.
"My point, you insolent girl, is that I have a dilemma. As much as I would like to get rid of you, and believe me, I would – I cannot; because it would mean that Kylo Ren would become distracted by the thought of you and how you were faring." He spat this last sentence, disgust obvious in his tone of voice. "Which is why I need you to do me a favour."
"There is no favour in this galaxy you could ask me for that I would comply with."
"Now, I know that is not true. I truly believe that you would do anything for this man. This man you somehow believe him to be."
"I do not believe him to be anybody." She could feel her voice getting softer as she said so.
"Ah, there it is. The side of you that is terrible at lying. Of course you believe him to be somebody. If not, you would have attempted to escape much more fervently, as futile as those attempts may have been. You care for him. I am not blind."
"Who is this Supreme Leader Snoke I have heard you speak of?" She asked, desperately trying to change the subject. She was not able to control her emotions when it came to talking about Ben.
"Do not try and thwart me, there is no use. You are not a part of the Resistance – if you had, the Master of the Knights of Ren would have found it by now, and he would have reported it immediately. It would have given him a proper reason to keep you prisoner."
"Then what is it you want from me?"
"I want you to push him to the Dark side. I want you to pull out any and all hope from under him – leave him to crumble to dust, to turn to despair, and fully become who Supreme Leader Snoke believes he can be. If you do this, then I will make you an offer. If you succeed, if you succeed in truly separating him from whatever it is that attracts him towards you, I will set you free. I will allow you to return to Jakku, unharmed, and resume the miserable life you undoubtedly led on that wretched planet."
She sucked in a breath, not daring to respond. She did not trust herself to respond. There was no way that she could push Ben to the Dark Side. There was no way she could do that to him, do that to herself, do that to his parents, who still loved him, who still missed him. She swallowed her fears, instead asking the only question she truly needed answered at the moment.
"When will he be coming back?"
Hux ignored her question, obviously knowing that it would drive her insane.
"I will allow you to think about my offer. I understand it may take a while. I also hope you understand that you do not really have any other options."
She knew that it would be her only chance to escape. She could not give up on Ben, however. He was still in there, somewhere. She saw it whenever he stepped closer to her when it was unnecessary, she saw it whenever he came to speak to her without his helmet on, she saw it whenever he acknowledged that they had a past together, and she saw it when he had told her that he would be gone for a while. He had no reason to tell her, other than that he may have wanted too. Other than that he wanted her to know where he was, the same way Ben used to do whenever they would not see each other for a few days.
"What will happen if I refuse to comply?"
"You will find out soon enough."