"IT'S THE MORNING!" Jolene shouted with glee, although the sun had yet to fully rise. "You guys! You have to wake up now," She pulled herself up onto her parents' bed. "Hey!" She poked Harleen's cheek. "Hey, Mama. It's the mornin' time," She grabbed onto her face and attempted to force her eyelids open.
"Jo…" Harleen groaned, sleepily pushing the girl's hands away. "It's still too early. Santa hasn't even come yet."
"He has to! I already checked. All the presents are under the tree. Look!" She held up a sticky candy cane as evidence. "He put this in my stocking."
Harleen slowly blinked her eyes open, getting the darkened bedroom to come in to focus. Jolene smiled wider when she noticed and shoved her face against the woman's, pressing kisses all over her cheeks.
"Honey, that-," Harleen attempted to turn her face away. "That's a lot first thing in the morning."
"But I love you lots!" Jo reasoned. "Even in the mornin' time."
"Well, that's very nice…" Harleen stretched. "Is your brother up?"
"Yeah, he's how come I got into the greenhouse. I'm not big enough to open it myself," Jo told her.
"And that's by design," Pam mumbled into her pillow, her eyes shut tightly.
"Yay!" Jolene exclaimed, wiggling up in between them. "Now everyone's awake so we can start Christmas.
"What time is it?" Pam asked.
Harleen lazily flopped over and unlocked her phone. "5:20."
"That's…ridiculous. We made a deal, Jo," Pam's eyes were still closed, out of protest, it seemed. "What was our deal?"
"Mmm…I don't remember," Jo giggled.
"She's lying," Pam mumbled.
"I know," Harleen sighed.
Jo grinned. "Look, Mama. I've been workin' on my handstand," She stood up on the bed and bounced once or twice before planting her hands and kicking her legs up. She was able to maintain the position for an impressive few moments, but the bed's surface was too soft and her little muscles ultimately failed her. When she landed, it was unfortunately with her foot in Pam's face.
"Goddamn it, Jo!" Her eyes shot open, blazing an angry green. But she only had time to take in Jolene's fear-stricken face for a moment before she felt sticky liquid dripping down over her lip.
"I didn't mean it, Mom!" Jo exclaimed, grabbing the bedsheet and pressing it roughly to the woman's nose as it bled.
The fabric began to smoke as soon as it made contact with the green liquid, and Pam smacked her hand away.
The girl's eyes grew wide and her lip quivered and Pam was immediately apologetic as she pinched her nose just below the bridge to stop the bleeding.
"I didn't mean it, Mom…" tears began to gather in Jo's green eyes.
Harleen gathered the girl up in her arms and kicked the soiled sheet down to their feet. "It's OK…" She soothed. "Mom's not mad, you just can't touch that stuff, remember? It'll hurt you."
"She is so mad," Jo insisted, her tears dampening Harley's nightshirt. "I just wanted to help because I hurt her."
"Well what the heck happened in here?!"
Pam, Harley and Jo all turned their attention to the doorway where Anthony was standing in his pajamas with snow on his boots.
"Your sister kicked me in the face," Pam told him, her voice nasally as she kept up the pressure.
"But I didn't mean it!"
"But she didn't mean it," Pam echoed.
"Did she break your nose?" Anthony asked, hands on his hips. "Because she breaks everything, so that would make sense."
"Mean!" Jo pointed at him accusatorily. "Can't be mean on Christmas."
"You said the same thing about Chanukah," he reminded her.
"That's Mama's Christmas," Jo explained, earning her an eyeroll from her brother.
"Hey," Harleen laughed. "No eyerolling on Christmas."
"Well then what can we do on Christmas?" Anthony asked.
Harleen grinned. "How about…OPEN PRESENTS?!" She began to mercilessly tickle Jolene, replacing her earlier tears with laughter.
Anthony was smiling too now, but it faded somewhat when he looked at Pam. "You alright, Mom?"
"Yes," She acknowledged, cautiously testing her slightly accelerated healing by taking her hands away from her nose.
"No gymnastics on the bed, Jolene," He scolded.
The girl stuck her fingers in her ears and screwed her eyes shut. "Na-na-na-na-gymnastics is for everywhere."
Anthony shook his head disapprovingly and retreated back down the hallway towards the stairs.
Jolene watched him go, but turned her attention to Pam when she heard her sigh. "I'm really sorry my foot hit your face on Christmas," she said, staring down at her lap.
Pam narrowed her eyes slightly, watching Jolene fiddle with her Powerpuff Girls pajama pants by poking Blossom in the eye. Finally, as a smirk played on her lips, Pam held out her arms to her daughter and Jolene perked up immediately, lunging forward into Pam's embrace
"Well…" Harleen sighed contentedly, getting up and pulling on a pair of sweats and a hoodie, "At least we're awake. Mission accomplished, Jo."
The girl beamed as she separated from Pam. "Yeah, I did a really good job, huh?"
"Mmm…something like that," Pam acknowledged, kissing Jo on the forehead before picking her up and setting her down on the ground. "I'll need to have those incinerated," she gestured to the rumpled-up sheets.
"That's because you're Pooooiiiiisssssson Ivy," Jo stomped on a crack in the wood floor. "And so only special little girls like me can hug you because you're my Mom."
"But…" Pam prompted.
"But nobody can touch your owies, not even Mama because then it would give us owies," Jo answered, a wide, self-satisfied smile on her face. "I know all the rules cuz I'm the smartest."
Pam got out of bed and cinched her robe around her waist. "Oh, really? What was the rule about Christmas morning?"
"That I couldn't wake ya up until 6-3-0," Jolene proudly put her hands on her hips, and it was only when Pam raised an eyebrow that she realized what she'd done. "Uh oh…"
"Yeah," Pam agreed, "Uh oh."
"Looks like we know who's gonna be opening their presents last," Harleen said. "Gotta work out those patience muscles."
"Patience muscles aren't real," Jo pouted.
The tree and the presents were kept in the greenhouse because Pam categorically refused to cut down a tree and bring it inside, and having a plastic tree would have been downright sacrilegious. So, instead, she just grew one out of the soil bottom of the greenhouse. They'd brought the record player in to provide some background music appropriate for the holiday. Perhaps it was a bit unconventional, but an attempt at something "traditional" had clearly been made.
Harleen sat on Pam's lap in the grass, mostly so she wasn't tasked with holding herself upright given the limited amount of sleep she'd had. She nursed a poorly prepared mug of coffee Anthony had brewed for her while they watched the kids separate their presents into distinct piles to make the opening more efficient. The wrapping paper was all, of course, made from recycled materials.
"Anthony first," Pam reminded Jolene, who already had her mitts on a package.
Smiling, Anthony dragged the largest box over to him and read the card aloud. "To Anthony, From…Nerd."
Harleen snickered and Pam rolled her eyes. "It's from me, Hon. Mama just wrote the card."
"Hey! And wrapped it!" Harley protested. "Give me credit where credit is due."
"It's wrapped very nicely, Mama," Anthony granted, making the first tear in the paper. He was only halfway through unwrapping it when he shot up to his feet. "No way!" He looked excitedly at his parents. "No way!"
Pam laughed. "Yes way."
"Did you get this from work?" Anthony wanted to know as he tore through the rest of the paper, revealing the robotics kit.
Pam nodded, "To my understanding, if programmed and assembled correctly, it will be able to both crawl and fly."
"I get to program it?!" Anthony looked at the box in awe. He couldn't believe it.
"Yes, but Victor said you might be a little too young for it. It's meant to accompany advanced robotics courses," Pam explained.
"No, I can do it," Anthony assured her. "I can totally do it."
"Recruiting your Justice League friends to get presents for the kids is cheating," Harley whispered.
"Cyborg is not my friend, and there aren't rules to gift-giving," Pam whispered back. "It's not a competition."
"It's totally a competition."
"Alright," Pam laughed. "Then how about you step up your game, Quinzel? Don't hate the player."
Jolene was beginning to squirm watching her brother examine his gift. She bit her lip looking at her pile of presents and even went as far as to sit on her hands to resist the temptation to just dive in. "Maaaammmmaaaaa," she finally whined, looking helplessly in her parents' direction.
Harley laughed. "Go ahead, Jo. And good patience."
The girl grinned almost maniacally and snatched the closest present to her, ripping the paper off with no reverence to speak of. Next she tore the lid of the garment box that she'd revealed…and then her jaw dropped. "It's so sparkly…" she murmured, reaching into the box to grab the bright blue, sequined leotard. "This is the sparkliest thing I've ever seen."
Harleen and Pamela both had to bite the inside of their cheeks to keep from laughing.
"What is it, Jo?" Harley asked.
She raised her eyes slowly. "Mama…" she clutched the fabric in her hands. "Its—Mama…"
"Yes?" Harleen giggled.
Tears began to well up in the girl's eyes. "It's a gymnastics outfit, Mama."
Harley knew it was inappropriate, but she couldn't keep the smile off her face. "Jolene, why are you crying?"
"Cuz it's-cuz it's," she held the leotard up to the light, watching as it shimmered. "Cuz it's the prettiest outfit I ever saw."
"Turn it around, Jo. Look!" Anthony urged.
She did just that, and when she saw there was a Bat-symbol on the chest, she absolutely lost it, her tears of joy turning to full on sobs.
"Jolene," Harley sat forward and set her coffee down. "Jolene, would you like to put it on?"
"Yes, please," She cried, getting up and running over to Harley, thrusting the garment at her with both hands and turning her head away like it was too amazing to even look at anymore.
Jolene spent the remainder of the day doing cartwheels and handstands in front of the mirror, or kicking and punching the air, adding a "na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-BATMAN!" for good measure. Later that night, when Anthony had changed back into his pajamas to watch Elf, Jolene refused, electing to remain in the leotard instead.
"So how is that not cheating?" Pam whispered, looking at Jolene who lay fast asleep on the couch, using Anthony's shoulder as a pillow. He, too, was asleep, his glasses just barely clinging to the tip of his nose.
"Well, because I didn't ask for help," Harley smiled. "It's just a natural instinct," She shrugged.
Pam scoffed. "All she talks about is gymnastics. That's like if I said I had a "natural instinct" that water is wet."
"Sass on Christmas? How dare you," Harley chastised, playfully nudging the other woman.
"Harley…you're Jewish," Pam reminded her. "Please explain to me your fascination with this holiday."
The blonde smiled and interlaced their fingers. Looking down at them, she asked, "Do you remember our first Christmas together?"
Pam took a moment to piece together the timeline. "You were in your chair, right?"
"Mhm," Harley nodded. "And I was so depressed I completely forgot Chanukah. Just…forgot it."
"Well I would have reminded you, but—"
"You didn't know I was Jewish," Harley laughed.
"And I'm sorry about that," Pam said, her gaze now drifting to their hands as well. "I just never found the need for human religion, and that was…selfish of me. Looking back."
"It's alright," Harley chucked. "That's what you said back then, too. Because I saw you in that red sweater, remember? It was like Christmas Eve, I think, and you were wearing a red sweater and up against your green skin…I was like 'oh shit, it's Christmas already.'"
Pam's gaze hardened slightly. "And that made you very sad."
"Yeah," Harleen acknowledged. "It did. And you didn't get why. You said Christmas was a trillion-dollar promotion of botanical genocide."
"Which it is," Pam affirmed.
Harley smiled. "Which it is…But completely spacing an eight-night Holiday helped illuminate just how lost I really was."
"I don't remember that," Pam admitted.
"Well I do," Harley turned to look at her. "Because after I told you that, you took the laptop into your bedroom for like two hours with absolutely no explanation."
"Did I?" Pam laughed.
"Yeah…turns out, you were in there reading literally everything there is to know about Chanukah—because you're a thoughtful nerd—and you suggested that we celebrate all eight nights in one, which was so…not Poison Ivy of you."
Pam smiled as the memory slowly came back. "But you said 'no', it was too late. Might as well just celebrate Christmas."
"That's right," Harley laughed. "So…there are a lot of things I like about Christmas. I like the decorations and the food and the spirit of the Holiday…but my favorite thing about it is you."
"Why?" Pam asked. "Because I made an effort?"
"Mmm…I think I'd call it a sacrifice." Harley corrected.
They sat in comfortable silence for a moment as the credits began to roll on the movie.
"21 Christmases," Pam whispered.
Harley smiled. "Finally, our marriage doesn't need a fake ID."
Pam leaned her head against Harley's shoulder as Jo shifted in her sleep, mumbling something incoherent. "Do you want to take them up to bed?" Pam asked as the credits song switched to Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas.
"No," Harley said, shrugging her off of her shoulder and standing up.
Pam raised an eyebrow and Harley extended a hand. Questioningly, Pam took it and was helped to her feet. With a small smile on her lips, Harley gently placed her hand on Pam's hip and kept hold of the other one, swaying slightly with the music. Pam took her cue and draped her hands over Harleen's shoulders, leaning in and resting her face in the crook of her neck, taking a deep breath as they moved in unison.
Harley wrapped her other arm around Pam's waist and pulled her closer. "I wish we could have 21 more like this," she murmured.
"Well I'm not going anywhere," Pam smiled, kissing the soft skin below her lips.
"But I am," Harleen reminded her, and as she did she felt Pam suddenly clutch a bit tighter.
"We don't have to talk about that now."
"But we will someday," Harley said. "Maybe someday soon. Anthony is 10 already, Jo is 5…I told you it would all move quickly."
Pam nodded subtly, still not loosening her grip.
"The other moms in the PTA think I married a younger woman," Harleen chuckled. "Pretty soon they'll be calling me a cougar," Her neck began to feel damp where Pam's face was pressed, so she kissed the top of her head, knowing Pam was upset, but knowing it would upset her more if Harley saw her cry. "We're going to have to explain it to the kids."
"I don't want it," Pam mumbled, her voice a bit shaky. "And I don't want things to change."
"Yeah, me neither…" Harley sighed. "I'm sorry I'm a human."
"You don't have to be," Pam whispered. "I could change you," The words were out before Pam could think better of them. She knew it was probably a mistake to ask that. It was something Pam had been thinking about for some time, but she'd never asked because then it would be out there. Final. A yes or no question. And Pamela knew in her heart that she would say no.
"Would you wish it upon anyone else?" Harleen asked. When Pam didn't answer, she stopped and put her hand under Pam's chin, forcing her to meet her eyes. She used her thumb to wipe her tears away and then asked, "Would you wish it upon me?"
Pam dropped her gaze. "If you asked me, I would."
"I'm not asking."
Pam's lip quivered, and as a new tear rolled down her cheek, she lunged forward and kissed Harley—hard. Like she was trying to stop this moment from spinning out of control. Trying to control something. Trying to keep Harley there and never let her go.
The song had long since ended, the DVD had looped back to the menu, but there Pam stood with her fingers threaded through Harley's hair, Harley's strong arms still wrapped around her waist.
"I'm yours as long as I'm here," Harley murmured once they broke apart. "But I—I can't stay forever."