"What do you mean, you're leaving?"
Cara had just made her first and only friend on the base on D'Qar. It still did not feel like home. Ben was the only person that made her smile any more. Even her parents had seemed to forget how to talk to her. She barely saw them anyway, they were always working.
"My dad is taking me with him on the Millennium Falcon! He's going to show me the galaxy." He grinned, and she was happy for him – but she could not help the sinking feeling that somehow he was abandoning her. She was jealous of his father. It was ludicrous, even her six-year old self knew this, but that was just how she felt. She could not help it.
"What am I going to do by myself for a whole week?"
"It's only a week, Cara! You can explore the base more – and then you can show me all the cool stuff you've found!"
She was scared to explore the base on her own. She was not as adventurous as Ben, and she feared she never would be. Not unless he went with her. He knew that. He knew that she was frightened. Shadows made her jump and noises made her yelp. Whenever she started to tremble, he would grab her hand and lead her further down another corridor, determined to get her over her fear. She felt it was useless. He did not. Her first day on the base, the first day they had met – it was the only time she had gone off to wander on her own. Apparently, she needed a strong enough motive to want to prove a point to her parents to overcome her fears. Nowadays, she needed Ben.
"A lot can happen in a week." She said – anything to get him to change his mind.
"I think you'll be okay." She knew how badly he wanted to go on this trip. It was all he had talked about since the day they met. His father, the adventurous voyager, the courageous hero. He adored his father, as a child should.
"How about I let you borrow my replicas? You can play with them all week! And then when I get back, you can tell me all the new stories you made up. You're much better at inventing stories than I am anyway."
It was true – he loved her stories. She was thankful that there was at least one thing that she was better at than him – she felt their friendship would be terribly unbalanced if she was not. She felt an enormous sense of pride whenever he asked her to tell him another story – a story of brave warriors and princess that were off saving the galaxy. He said it reminded him of his mother and father. It reminded her of her own parents, too – they were always out exploring the galaxy, flying further into the universe than Cara would ever dare; so she made up stories to satisfy her own thirst for knowledge. It was safer, and easier.
"I guess." She said, lowering her gaze to the floor. She did not know what to say to him anymore. Nothing was going to change his mind. In the two short months that she had known him – and it already felt like a lifetime – she had found out just how stubborn he was. How much pride he had. How cunning he was, and how inquisitive. She could not stop him from going on this trip. Deep down, she knew she did not want to, anyway. Not anymore.
"I'm going to promise you something." He said, making her look up at him once more.
"What?"
"One day, you are going to get over your fear of the dark, and the galaxy, and we're going to explore it together. It'll be so much fun! We can map out our entire journey, and we can visit places I know my dad's been. We can even visit places I know he hasn't been, and then we can rub it in his face that he hasn't seen them yet!"
"And what if I'm still too scared?"
"You won't have to be. I'll be there with you."
"You promise?"
"I promise. Besides, it's not like you'll ever go off without me anyway." He grinned, clearly teasing her. She was having none of it however, and huffed, turning her back on him in the process.
"I don't need you." She said rather indignantly.
"We both know that's not true. I'm the only friend you've got!"
"And I'm the only friend you've got, Ben Solo. You need me too, so you best not annoy me."
She stayed quiet, waiting for him to throw a retort back in his face, but he did not. He knew her words were true, just as she knew that his words were true. They were each other's only friends. There were not a lot of other kids around to befriend. They needed each other.
"Come with me to my room, and I'll give you some of my replicas."
He grabbed her hand, and led her up to his room. She had not been up there yet. She was curious to see what kind of treasures he was hiding in there.
She gasped when he led her into his room – he had so many drawings hanging on his walls, and even more replicas in his room than she knew what to do with. She had no doubt that he had put some of them together on his own, and she would have a hard time choosing which ones she would borrow for the week. On the other side of the room, an entire bookcase was filled to the brim with books – books he could undoubtedly not yet fully understand, but he could look at the diagrams, and the illustrations, and imagine it was him writing one of those books about his own great adventures. About his own history. It suddenly dawned on her why he liked her stories so much – they could tide him over until he had stories to tell of his own.
"Wow, your room is just like the storage room we found the first day we met!" She exclaimed, feeling slightly overwhelmed by the sheer amount of things in his relatively small room. She was happy to see it, though. She felt like she was getting to know him a little better this way.
"I leave tomorrow, so you'll have to pick the stuff you want today. You can take some of the books too, if you want. There's some great pictures in them."
She did not need to say thank you, he already knew she was thankful. It would tide her over until she got back. He felt slightly guilty at the prospect of leaving her, and sad too. Even if it was only for a week, he would miss her.
"Okay." She whispered, barely listening to him anymore as she browsed the rows of book that lined his shelves. There was one that stood out to her on the top shelf– an enormously thick volume that had a beautiful illustration on the spine. She pulled it out, and it was heavier than she thought. She stumbled backwards a little bit, but he caught her, his hand on her back as he helped her lift the book off the shelf. The cover illustration was beautiful too – it looked like a desert planet – lonely and desolate, but somehow comforting. She laid it down on his bed and quickly flicked through the pages. There were more than enough drawings and pictures to fuel her imagination. She would have an entirely new collection of stories to tell him when he got back.
"Can I take this one?" She asked, rather tentatively. Something about this book seemed precious to him – it was in much better condition than any of the others.
"Of course! That one is my favourite."
She smiled at him, showing him just how grateful she was. He smiled back at her, happy that she finally seemed to be okay with him leaving.
They had left the door to his room slightly ajar, and in the distance, Cara could suddenly hear her mother calling for her. She did not want to leave yet – he was leaving tomorrow, and she would not see him for an entire week. He sensed her hesitation, and he was glad, because he did not want her to leave either. Not yet, anyway.
"Will you tell me one more story before I go?" He asked, desperately hoping she would say yes.
"Well, only if you really want me to." She teased, just like he had teased her a few moments ago.
"Cara, come on, you know I really want you to." He playfully pushed her arm, trying to show him just how curious he was about her imagination. He found it fascinating, how she could just conjure up stories out of nowhere. He was always better at dealing with facts.
"Okay, if you insist."
They both sat down on his bed, cross-legged and facing each other, as she told him another wondrous story that took place a long time ago – a story of a friendship being formed in battle, that lasted for as long as both the characters lived.
There was a knock on her door as she once more laid down on the floor, reminiscing about times gone by. Reliving the past was all she could do to stop herself from losing her mind.
The knock was sharp; it was not the knock of a bored Stormtrooper come to bring her a meal. She sat up, suddenly alert, waiting for whoever it was to let themselves in. She could hardly believe that it was yet another summoning to come see General Hux – he had made his threats to her quite clear just a mere few days ago.
As predicted, a Stormtrooper walked in, but thankfully, it was the only one she wanted to see. FN-2187 quickly took off his helmet, his friendly face instantly making her feel more at ease, and she noticed he was carrying something under one arm. Before she could question him about the mysterious object, however, he had already started the conversation.
"I heard General Hux asked you to see him a few days ago."
"Yes, he did. How do you know that?"
"I heard a few of the officers talking. They say he's been acting irrationally out of character the past few weeks."
"And I guess they think that has something to do with me?"
"I don't know what it is they are thinking, but I know what it is I'm thinking. What did he say to you?"
"He threatened me again. He wanted to know what Kylo Ren means to me."
"So did you tell him?"
"No – I can't. I myself don't even know what he means to me. Not right now, anyway."
He stayed silent for a moment. Looking down at the object under his arm as though pondering whether or not to tell her about it. She decided not to give him a choice, and asked him about it point blank.
"What are you carrying?"
"Well – I – I think it may help you figure out what he means to you."
"You mean Kylo Ren? How?"
"He told me to give it to you."
"You, specifically? Why?"
He took a few strides towards her and lowered his voice as though he was worried someone was listening. It was impossible though – the door had slammed shut a mere few seconds after he had entered.
"I'm pretty sure he knows I'm the one who helped you get to the bridge."
The colour drained from her face at the thought. She was suddenly so worried that she had put him in danger. She reprimanded herself for asking him for such a huge favour – she should have known what the consequences would be.
"No – No. It's okay. I actually don't think he was mad." He responded, obviously in reaction to the horrified look on her face.
His statement confused her. How could Ben – Kylo, not have been mad at the Stormtrooper stood in front of her? He had seemed so distant and frankly, disgusted after she had shown him that last memory – a memory which only served to show him how vulnerable he could truly be. Why would he even ask FN-2187 to deliver something to her?
"What is it?"
"He said you would know."
He handed her the heavy object, and the weight was surprisingly familiar in her hands. She turned it over, and gasped, recognizing the book with the beautiful cover illustration she now held right away. It was the same one from the memory she had just been thinking about – the one that had opened her mind to so many stories, the one he had confessed to her had been his favourite. Once, when they were eight years old, he had told her that he had misplaced it. He had been so upset with himself that he had refused to see her for a few days, before she somehow finally convinced him to come out of his room. Evidently, he had found it sometime later, and kept it all these years. Now, suddenly, he was giving it to her? She did not know what to feel. She did not know what to say in reaction to the inquisitive eyes of the friendly Stormtrooper staring at her. She was confused, emotional, and distraught. It was as though he had known that she would think of that memory, on this particular day. How, she did not know. There were stranger things in the universe though – and he had always known her so well. He knew her better than he knew himself. In that moment, she was only sure of one thing.
All she knew was that she wanted to see Ben Solo again.
A/N: As always, I hope you enjoy, and thanks to all the new people that have followed and favourited! Reviews and feedback are always welcome :)