Jacob is unnervingly causal and almost overly comfortable with me. I, however, am not as comfortable with him. Mostly because I am a normal person and it takes longer than a month for me to accept someone into my life as if they'd always been there. Hah! I'm actually the normal one. But it has been less than a month, hardly three weeks if it matters, but I hardly ever count anything. I just don't find it important. And I haven't decided how I feel about him yet. His head lies on my shoulder. I haven't shrugged him off simply because I'm amused and almost awed by the angle he's got his spine at in order to reach my miniscule shoulder.
"It's almost your birthday, Teddy," Jacob says.
"Are you comfortable?" I ask.
There almost isn't enough sarcasm in my question because I am truly concerned. Bones are not supposed to do that.
"Actually, I am. You're very soft, but don't change the subject. It's almost your birthday," he says.
I smile.
"So, what? We go to a movie and eat at the diner? Or maybe we go to Seattle! We always do that, there's nothing else to do," I say.
As significant as my 15th birthday is, I don't want to celebrate it. I'm starting to wish I took Dempsey up on his offer, but I haven't seen him since then. I hate celebrating it. Everyone cries and pretends that they aren't thinking about what my parents would think if they were here to gaze upon my tiny, pale body. If I was them I'd suggest donuts and straight butter, along with several hours in the sun. I would make sure I wasn't dying or something. They wouldn't be proud of me. My birthday is just one more thing to remind me of that.
"You don't want to celebrate your birthday?" Jacob asks, scandalized.
"Er..no. Birthdays aren't my thing," I say.
He looks into my eyes and says- whines-
"But, Teddy! I want to do something for you. They're all going to, you know they will. I want to do something you actually want."
Do I want anything? Wouldn't it just be easier to ignore everything? There's already Christmas to worry about. I hope no one gets me anything.
"My birthday is right after Christmas. I don't need anything," I say.
"Then I'll get you the best Christmas gift in the world," he says warmly.
The strand of hair above my eye changes from sandy brown to black and back again. I tug it behind my ear. I eat a slice of roast beef from the bowl that was balancing beside me on the arm of the couch and avoid eye contact. I think I know what's flustering me.
"Is this really necessary?" I ask Billy.
He smiles and shakes the glittery thing at me again. "Teddy" it declares proudly in gold flakes of much too much joy.
"Hang it up by the fire," he suggests.
"Billy," I say.
He places the stocking in my hand.
"Your first.. what was it? Muggle Christmas. I want to do it right," Billy says.
I sigh and hang the red stocking up by the fire. It mocks me, in Gryffindor colors. I'm a Hufflepuff, like mum, I think in my head aggressively at the dumb thing. Why, I'll never know.
Jacob and Embry come panting in with a tree in their hands.
"Why is there a tree inside the house?" I ask.
"For Christmas!" Jacob says.
"For Christmas," Embry agrees with a nod.
I shake my head in confusion.
"I don't see the connection," I say.
"Santa Claus puts presents under the tree for good children. So you have to have a tree," Jacob says.
"I will be a legal adult in three days," I say flatly.
"But Christmas!" he insists.
I sigh.
"Humor him, Teddy. It's the best for all of us," Billy says.
Easy for you to say. He asked twice for a Christmas tree and you let him. I roll my eyes.
"Alright," I sigh heavily.
"Jacob, I told you not to!" I say.
He pats my head and pushes the small present into my hands. I was hoping the holiday wouldn't be celebrated on the reservation, even with all the lights and stockings Jacob had been hanging about. It isn't that I don't like getting presents, I love them, but I feel like I don't deserve them. I pull open the wrapping paper.
"I didn't. Well, I did.. but I made it myself," he says.
I pull out the little silver necklace and stare at it. The centerpiece is a wooden dreamcatcher and it lies on a braided silver and blue string. I stare at it.
"Do you like it?" he asks.
I stare at it a little longer, then I thrust it at him. His face falls. I turn my back to him and stand there. My entire face is pink and my hair will soon follow suit if he doesn't get a clue soon. He carefully places it around my neck. I stare fervently at the floor.
"Thank you, Jacob. I love it," I say quietly.
When I work up the nerve to turn around (and have gained control of my hair) he's perched on the couch and gnawing on the Wizard candy I gave him. I wonder if he cares that my present is less meaningful than his. Doesn't last as long. He crosses the room in three strides and pulls me into a tight hug.
"Caught you," he whispers, the words barely audible.
Almost like they weren't supposed to be.
He lets me go with a flick at my necklace. I kick my foot at the carpet.
"And since I've caught you, I get three wishes," he says with a large, dopey smile.
"I'm not a genie!" I say.
"Wish one: when you go to Forks High School I want to go with you," Jacob says.
"You'll just do what you want anyway," I grumble, "What's your second wish?"
He shrugs, smiles, and goes to sit next to Billy who has been watching the whole exchange with amusement and- something else.
I sigh.
I attempt to stare at the stupid thing in contempt but I can't force myself to. Emerald icing spread crookedly looks back at me under the equally stupid words. He just doesn't listen. But I can't think it, even for a second. Jacob tried to make my birthday special. He remembered my favorite color is emerald. I've never had a friend who cared so much. I've hardly had friends at all and now I'm looking down at this misshapen cake that he clearly made by himself and I- I love it.
"Sundays at Tiffany's is on," Jacob says.
His voice draws me out of the kitchen. It is my favorite movie, but I refuse to admit it.
"I don't know why she even bothers. It's always the best friend," I say while plopping onto the couch and accepting a roast beef Hot Pocket and a cherry Coke.
"Happy birthday, Teddy," Billy says as he wheels out of the house.
I wonder where he's going now. Probably to make a spectacle of the unspectacular date of December 27th. I'm happy with what I have now, Coke and sappy love stories.
"What are you talking about, Teddy? It's never the best friend," Jacob says.
I narrow my eyes at him.
"Always," I say.
"Never."
"Always!"
"You're my best friend, Teddy," Jacob says.
I lean in close.
"I'll never change my opinion, Jacob. It's always the best friend. Always," I say.
Behind me, the movie ends. Jacob's eyes slip down to the necklace resting at my collarbone.
"I'm supposed to take you to the beach now," he says.
I pull back and rub my cheek, forcing it to stay pale. The beach is over decorated and full of smiling people, as I expected. I lose my battle with my cheeks.
"Er..thanks," I say, "Thank you for coming, thank you for the presents, thank you, thank you."
It becomes my chant. Embry hovers near me. I flash him an unsuccessful smile.
"You look uncomfortable," he says.
I point at the giant pile of presents and all of the people standing around.
"It's overwhelming," I admit quietly.
He bumps his shoulder against mine.
"Ted- is it really so bad?" he asks.
"Yes. It is that bad. They don't even know me," I say.
He shrugs. I watch the people in the crowd dance.
"So you've got Jacob going to public school," Embry says.
"I guess. Mostly he makes demands and I give in," I say.
He laughs. I bring my hand up to my necklace.
"What?" I ask.
"Nothing," he laughs.
Horrible liar, this boy.
"Hey, birthday boy!" Quil says loudly.
I give him a little wave.
This is all too much. The prophecy, the presents. My breath goes shallow and I close my eyes. I wish that I could just go back inside and eat my lopsided cake. I want to study because the placement tests put me in junior science and math instead of freshman classes. Probably due to my ill supervised tutor. I want-
"Teddy. Calm down, it's alright," Jacob says.
I turn around. He takes ahold of the hand clutching my necklace and squeezes it.
"Is it?" I ask.
He always knows what I'm thinking. Why? He hardly knows me. Why does he care so much? Jacob lifts his hand, but it's twisted so that only one finger is pointed up.
"Wha-?"
Jacob punches my shoulder.
"It's in my left pocket," he says.
What is?
I reach into his pocket and find- my chocolate? Oh, when I gave him candy for Christmas. He must've realized how much I eat. That I eat chocolate when I'm stressed out and missing the oppressive tranquility that was life with only Andromeda and I. I savor it slowly.
"Better?" he asks.
"Better," I say with a smile.
He lets go of my hand and gives me a quick hug. Embry walks past us laughing hysterically and Quil runs after him howling. I shrug my shoulders and go off to open my presents with a little square of chocolate in my pocket.