It felt as though she was running in circles; if Cara had not understood the sheer size of this base before, she did now. Every hallway led to another turn, which lead to another stairwell, which led to another corridor. All the doors looked the same, made of the bleak grey metal that gave off an aura of sturdiness that would not so easily be defeated. She often liked to think of herself as being as strong as metal; as one of the heroines in her imaginings and tales that would be remembered for years to come. She may have been strong-willed, but she did not in fact, feel so strong. The confusion and anger she felt inside of her made her feel weak and malleable, as though anyone could manipulate her now because she was incapable of making up her own mind. She wanted Kylo to tell her what to do, or Ben, but even then, she could never be sure if their decision was the right one for her. How could she possibly make a judgement for herself when the only factor affecting her choice was the one man who had turned her into this mess?
The times that she had roamed the hallways before had been ruled by fear, wondering if every corner she turned would bring her face to face with a Stormtrooper, Captain Phasma, or worse, General Hux. Now, though, there was nothing that could truly worry her. If any of them decided to harm her in any way, Kylo Ren was sure to seek out punishment. That was her assurance as she tried to figure out what was happening in the far corners of the base; if the Resistance had come to fight, if Han Solo was truly there, if Rey had gotten to safety. She needed to know if she was going to be able to sleep at night. She had had enough restless nights to last her a lifetime.
She turned a corner, and suddenly heard whisperings merely a few paces away from her. She came to a standstill, hoping to hear a snippet of conversation that would give her any clue as to what was going on. She had expected to hear the familiar distorted voices of the Stormtroopers, but was instead greeted by the sound of a rather animated voice obviously trying to tell someone what it was they needed to do.
"I'll find Rey. I just hope she's alive."
Cara recognized the voice, a smile immediately breaking out across her face as she ran towards the source before she could even stop herself. She slipped to a halt right in front of her old friend FN-2187, who looked just as surprised as she was to see her there.
"You- you're here! Why are you still here?" He asked her, seemingly shocked and delighted to see his old friend again.
"That, FN, is a very long story that I hope to tell you some other time. Although I'm afraid you may not like it very much."
He smiled a sad little smile at her, knowing exactly what she was talking about but still wishing it was not true.
"The name is Finn now, actually." He said, trying to lighten the mood.
"Finn. It suits you. I'm glad someone found you a better name." She said, lightly squeezing his hand to indicate just how happy she was to see him. In the midst of her joy over his presence, she had completely forgotten that he had been talking to someone. She turned around to face his companion, already knowing who it was and dreading seeing such a familiar face. Han Solo had aged considerably since she had last seen him, not just because of the years that had gone by but also the emotional stress that he had been put under since the disappearance of his son. She felt sympathy towards him as well as resentment, two sides of her battling for dominance over what she should say to the man in front of her.
"Cara,' Han said, softly, as though he could not quite believe who he was seeing, 'He took you, didn't he? Took you here as a prisoner. Just as he did with Rey." She could hear the anger in his voice, but also the distress, and she suddenly realized that he was probably just as confused about Kylo Ren as she was. How could he still find love for his son after all the things his boy had done? It was a question that she herself ignored every time she saw Kylo, every time he touched her. It was a question better left unanswered as long as he gave her no other reason to truly think about it.
"Yes, but he is not who you think he is. He never hurt me, not really."
"Not really isn't exactly good enough for me." Han replied, taking in the dishevelled and tired appearance of the girl in front of him. Her robes hung around her body, her cheeks were sunken in and her eyes had dark circles under them, a meagre indication of how tired she actually was.
"It does not matter. Not right now."
"Where have you been all this time? Why did you never come back to D'Qar? Leia was worried about you, you know."
"I can imagine that she was, I suppose. I cannot really imagine that you were, however." She said, allowing her latent resentment towards him to seep its way into her words. It was strange, because he was not actually giving her a reason to become so irritated with him, but it was a feeling over which she had no control, and everything that Ben Solo and Kylo Ren had ever told her about him was swimming through her mind, making it hard for her to judge the situation correctly.
"Of course I was! I went looking for you! Chewie and I spent a lot of time scouring the galaxy for you, kid. You did a pretty good job of hiding yourself." He said, looking at Chewbacca pointedly, who moaned in confirmation.
She swallowed her guilt, trying not to let the caring look in his eyes disarm her. She was still here for Kylo, for Ben, and she would not allow Han Solo to sway her to his side unless she had no other choice.
"Why are you here, anyway?" She asked, hoping to steer the conversation away from their surprise reunion.
"We're here to blow a dent in the First Order's power supply. Care to join us?" Han asked, and she could see the familiar twinkle in his eyes, ready for adventure and danger just as he had always been. It was something she genuinely admired in him. She could not respond, knowing that whatever they did would have an impact on Kylo in some way. She needed to know where he was and what he was doing – she was becoming anxious to be near him once more.
"Listen, I realize that you guys are having some kind of a reunion and all, and I'm glad to finally actually know that you're name is Cara and everything, but we still have to find Rey and then get out of here before this place blows up."
Cara snapped her gaze towards Finn, thinking he would say something more, until she was distracted by Han's nod towards the window. Her eyes widened, as she saw the small but unmistakeable figure of Rey climbing her way up the wall right in front of them.
"What are you doing? Why are you nodding your head like that, huh? What does that mean?" Finn asked, becoming annoyed as Han nodded to the glass once more. Cara grabbed Finn's head between her hands, turning it so that he could finally see what they were seeing. He caught a glimpse of Rey just as she pushed herself through one of the shafts.
He snapped out of his stupor, running in the general direction where he thought he would find Rey, Cara, Chewie and Han following him as quickly as they could. All five of them almost crashed into one another as Rey raised her weapon, ready to hit whoever it was that she had encountered. As realization finally dawned on her, she lowered her weapon in amazement before throwing herself into Finn's arms.
"Are you alright?' Finn asked the young scavenger before pulling her into another hug, 'What happened? Did he hurt you?"
"Never mind me. What are you doing here?" Rey asked, disbelief clear in her voice.
"We came back for you." Finn said softly, and Cara could see in his eyes how much he cared for Rey, and it was clear that Rey cared for him as well. The pair stared at each other a little longer, smiling softly. Neither of them had probably had a lot of people that cared about them in their lives, Cara thought to herself. She could hardly imagine what that must feel like.
Rey's gaze suddenly turned to Cara, her eyebrows crinkling with worry. "Cara, are you alright? Did he find you?"
"Yes, he did. It's alright. I do not believe he suspected me."
"Good. I'm glad." Rey said, smiling at Cara.
"Look, I'm happy that everyone's alright, but right now, we've got a job to finish." Han said, breaking up the moment and snapping everybody back to reality.
The five of them moved quickly towards the Oscillator Bay. Finn had explained that that was the only sensible place to set the explosive charges. He and Rey had left, trying to make sure that the bay was accessible, leaving Cara, Han and Chewie to await the opportunity to enter into the vast open space. Cara was only tagging along because she had a feeling that Kylo would make his presence known. With Han there, anything could happen, and she felt an urge to see whatever would transpire.
As soon as they were able to get in, the other two got to work planting the explosives on the support columns, as she wandered down the enormous hub of machinery, trying to detect if there were any other oncoming Stormtroopers than the ones that Han and Chewbacca had already taken out. She peered into a dark alcove, the blackness that she stared into so deep that she barely had time to register the fact that Kylo Ren was lurking there, in the shadows. She jumped, startled, covering her mouth with her hand to conceal the yelp of surprise threatening to escape between her lips.
"Cara. Why are you here? I seem to remember telling you to return to your cell." He said, and his use of the word cell jarred her, as though he no longer thought of her as a friend, or something more, but rather saw her as a prisoner. The person she had been to him when he had first brought her here.
"I needed to know what was happening, Kylo. Do you think it is easy for me to just sit in that small room, the worst possible scenarios coming to mind whenever I do not have you in my sight?"
"I expect you to listen to me."
"And I expect you to know me better than that by now." She said, a furious swell of emotion threatening to reveal hers and Kylo's location to Han and Chewie.
"There is no reason for you to be here, Cara. Not right now. Please, just listen to me." He said, and she could hear some of the Kylo Ren that she had come to care for in his voice, but his words told her more than enough. There was nothing that would make her leave now. Her mind was made up.
"I will only leave if you can tell me a good enough reason why I should." She said, knowing that she would not heed his words but curious to hear them anyway.
He was silent, as though he could not bring himself to explain what he was going to do. She could not predict his actions now, and she needed to know, hoping to understand him better when this entire ordeal was over.
"Will you be confronting your father?" She asked, hoping to get some kind of clarification out of him.
"Han Solo was Ben's father. Ben does not exist anymore."
Cara knew it would be useless to argue with his words, so she kept quiet, hoping that he would forget that he did not actually want her there. He remained quiet once more, and she thought that her manipulation had worked, until she realized that he was barely paying attention to her at all anymore. His helmet was pointed elsewhere, somewhere behind them, and she followed what she assumed to be his gaze until her sights landed on Han, placing his final charge on one of the pillars. After she had finished watching Han complete his task, she turned her head back towards Kylo, wishing once more that his helmet was off so that she could tell what he was thinking. He tilted his head down, as though he was gazing at her, and they stood like that for a moment before he gently pushed her aside, striding down the corridor towards the narrow footbridge and his confrontation with his father. Cara hid herself behind a control panel in order to witness the exchange, ignoring her gut feeling that something was about to go terribly wrong.
A/N: The last few chapters may take a little longer to upload, mainly because I plan on making them longer than usual and I want to make sure that I am getting them just right. Thanks for all the continued support!