Christian's POV – Friday 1st July 2011
"Ana," I start again as I kneel in front of her, this time it's my hands shaking as I hold hers, "I have loved you from the minute you fell into my office, I knew when I saw you in the wreck that you meant the world to me already. Now after what we've been through, I know I cannot live without you, life has no meaning and there is really no point in living if you are not by my side. I know I'm not worthy but will you give me the honour of being your husband? Angel, will you marry me?"
My heart is now beating outside of my chest as I look into Ana's eyes, her mouth a perfect O, I guess she didn't expect this and her eyes fill with tears that spill down her cheeks, my heart takes on a rhythm entirely of its own and I am sure she can hear it, as I wait for her to answer.
"May I ask a question please?" Ana finally says as her whole body trembles, her hands almost slipping out of mine and I nod numbly as she looks deep into my eyes.
"I want to have babies, a family, but I am scared of how bad a mother I will be, will you promise to look after the children if I can't?" and my heart tears asunder as I nod, tears now running down my own cheeks as she tightens her grip on my hands, strongly keeping me down on my knees.
"Ana, Baby, you will be a brilliant mother when the time comes, we will both make mistakes but I will never do anything but look after you and our children, I promise you that, on my life I promise you that, you deserve nothing less. My heart is entirely yours and it will just expand to include children, Baby, I promise." I hope it's enough, I have no doubt about her abilities, mine, a completely different story, I know that Ana will be the one re-assuring me when we have children but for now, all that matters is that Ana believes that I will be there and I watch as her mouth trembles and then slowly turns into a shy smile.
Then, only a little louder than a whisper, "I love you Christian and yes," and she pauses and I leap to my feet pulling her up with me as she throws her arms around my neck, just as my lips find hers, she whispers against them, "Yes, I would be honoured to have you as my husband, I can't live without you either, there's no point in forever without you," and the tears on our cheeks join together as I steal my first kiss from my fiancée.
Snuggled in my arms, Ana finally breaks our cosy silence by saying, "You know you are going to have to ask Ray, don't you?" and I smile against her hair as I nod, yes, that is going to be one interesting phone call but it will have to wait until the morning.
"It's getting cold baby, let's go inside," I say, and lift her and love the fact that now she can wrap her legs around my waist and I can hold her tight against my chest as she buries her face in my neck, her breath against my skin, the sound by my ear has me hard in a second and I stand still to steady myself but can't resist turning my head and nibbling on the shell of her ear and can feel the responding quiver in her body as she tightens her hold.
Walking back into the bedroom Ana's head swivels and she gasps as she realises that the room is filled with flowers and little fairy lights woven through them, all illuminated by candles held in antique type lanterns which provide a glow in which I can see her eyes shining and then she pulls back, puts her hands on my shoulders and looks at me in such a way that I simply stop in my tracks.
"You! You need to have more faith in yourself; this is so far beyond hearts and flowers. Why will you not see what I can see? Your heart is golden right the way through and my greatest present is that you are giving it to me."
I gently place her down on the edge of the bed, unable to speak as the emotion swells in my throat and instead sink down again onto one knee as I pull a red box out of my pocket.
I struggle to control my voice and it squeaks for a second and I tilt my head as I shake it, "See what you do to me," and her smile is angelic as she runs her hand lovingly along my jawline and I capture it in mine.
"Ana, if my heart shines, it is due to you and to mark that you have my heart in your hands and that I have willingly given it to you, will you wear this ring to tell the world of our love?"
I know I made the right choice when her smile splits her face and she leans forward and then hovers against my lips saying, "It's perfect, beautiful and not so huge that I scratch it and everyone that comes in contact with me and only you would find one that looks like this."
I smile, it was made especially for her, a rose gold heart shaped, chocolate diamond engagement ring and I have something else to say so before I accept her kiss I pull back and say with a small smirk, "I thought a chocolate diamond was appropriate," and the smile deepens if that was possible but I press my finger to her lips to stop her again, so that I can continue with "And you know how you felt like this house is home, well baby it is if you want it. I signed all the paperwork yesterday subject to your approval, to secure it, all you have to do is say yes and it will be ours."
And there is no stopping her as she flings herself at me, nearly knocking me off my heels, her mouth is on mine and kissing me with all her heart and soul as she nods her head. My hands wrap around her body as I stand with her and then they move to her hair as I allow her to consume me, her tongue dancing with mine and the moan I hear is mine, the thumping in my ears, my blood singing as it makes its way to my now joyous heart, brought alive by the amazing woman in my arms.
Me, the person I thought was unlovable and unable to love, totally and utterly loved and loving the amazing human who has promised to soon say the words to keep her by my side for eternity, there is no way I can thank her enough, the only thing I can do is show her how loved she is, and continue to do so every day that I live.
The thought has me dropping my hands caressingly down Ana's back until I am cupping her cute behind in my hands, after a slight squeeze, I move them to the front and undo the button and the zip and gently move down her jeans as she reluctantly leaves my mouth and leans on my shoulder giving me room. I can feel her heartbeat and it sounds awfully similar to mine and if there was ever any doubt as to whether we should be together, the fact that our hearts beat in unison removes it completely.
I sit her on the edge of the bed so that I can wriggle off her Converse and remove the jeans then slide my hands all the way up her body to remove the camisole, kissing the mounds of her breasts as they quiver above the demi-cups of her bra, the nipples straining to leap out to my waiting mouth or hands. I am willing to oblige their desire, grasping a nipple between each thumb and forefinger, the time to remove the bra just that second too long so with hands occupied, I start with my mouth again.
Her breath hot against my ear, I nibble again on the shell of her ear again, letting my tongue linger on her lobe until she arches her neck and I continue on my journey of discovery, little nips on her collarbone, back to those beautiful breasts, while my tongue teases, I remove the bra and she is there in all her glory before me but she stops me with a husky, "You are overdressed, I want to have some fun too," she finishes with a cheeky smile as I pull back to check that she's doing ok and allow her to undress me.
She takes great delight in slowly undoing my shirt buttons and tugging it out of my jeans, rubbing her hands down my chest, tweaking my nipples as she passes with a giggle as I growl and continues gently down my abs, gentle caressing rubs that speak of her love for me. It still amazes me how healing her touch is and having allowed myself to drift for a second, she surprises me by leaning forward and running her tongue down my happy trail as she teases my jeans down. I swear I nearly lose my famous control and can't stop the moan from deep within as lift her face and then guide her hands to my hips to remove my boxers and I pull away as I spring free.
Instinctively I lift her up in my arms, pulling her in tight, my erection firmly pressed against her still wrapped bounty and I grind gently against her until I realise it is making it more difficult for my control situation and any coherent thought. I step her backwards to lay her down on the petal covered bed, her hair, already messy covers the pillow, her eyes are hooded and her lips are slightly apart, as she struggles to control her breathing and I couldn't imagine a more beautiful sight.
I don't want to invoke the Aspen memory and I am mindful of the fact that her pelvis is far from healed so I kneel over her, her body arches for some contact and I smile against her breast, "Wait baby, all in good time. Relax, you're not healed yet and I want you to enjoy every part of this."
When her fingers entwine in my hair as I gently blow on her sodden lace and kiss her there with heat for good measure and she starts to wriggle, I wrap one arm around her hips holding her still while using my teeth and my other hand to pull the string, I think I'll keep buying this style for her, it will allow me better access without having to rip them off as I feel I will otherwise be doing.
As much as I want to draw it out I don't think I want to hold off her orgasm, the thought of what happened when I went down that track in the playroom is enough for my body to step back from the edge and Ana senses something and she says quietly lifting her head, "Are you ok?"
"Baby, more than ok," I smirk back at her and thankfully my face reassures her enough, "What about you baby?" I ask as I tap my fingers maddeningly closer and her mumbled response has me chuckling as I lower myself into position so that I can provide and then watch the enjoyment and track how she's going or coming as it were.
Again as in Aspen, Ana reminds me that she thinks that she is a one shot still at the moment and I'm still concerned that it is probably too early and I can't damage her pelvis and hold us up longer, then a thought occurs to me and I lift my tongue from the honeypot but leave my fingers keeping up a gentle rhythm to say, "Would you prefer to have a pure white wedding Ana, it's entirely up to you."
The explosive giggle, sounding like I have driven her to the edge of distraction, is followed by "Only if you organise the wedding for tomorrow," and I am sorely tempted, tomorrow wouldn't be soon enough for me to have her as my wife.
I can see that I am distracting her and she is trying to maintain the train of thought and between pants she looks at me tapping my lip thinking and says "No, don't you dare, I don't want a pure white wedding, thank you… now please… please," and it is almost a desperate plea.
Who am I to leave a maiden in distress and I grin and get back to making Ana understand that she is my whole world, it begins and ends with her now, each stroke, each lap, bringing her closer until her trembling has me pulling away and sheathing up.
"Babe, you know this is going to hurt a little, I'll try to ease in, tell me if it's too much" and she nods but I know she won't stop me, she's so ready for me, her body clenches around me and as I push through slowly, it's only a gasp like a puff of air as Ana absorbs the pain as she always does that indicates that I have broken through and I pause only to have Ana lift her hips for me to continue and I frown at her.
"Baby, let me set the pace and relax," and I lean forward to brush my lips over hers and then down to her nipples and continue, applying the dual sensations gently until the pressure is almost too much, her pleading sounds are driving me on and crazy. I push deeper, thrusting faster and harder and I feel the moment her body explodes and she screams a silent scream, her head thrown back, tears streaming down her cheeks, her hands falling limply to her sides as her body spasms around me, impossibly drawing me deeper. Her eyes open and look at me in wonder and close as her mouth returns to a smile.
One last thrust, has me reaching impossibly deep inside and as I join her, one word rends the air, "Mine", torn from my throat, the fireworks behind my eyes exploding with the release that has been building since the minute I first held her hand in mine.