A/N: Thanks for your reviews!

Chapter 4- Conjuring Up Spirits

Johanna had done some thinking while she washed the dishes that morning after Jim had left and she had decided that she did indeed need to speak with her grandmother. After drying her hands, she headed for the office, figuring that would be the best place to try and get into contact with her as that seemed to be where she could sometimes feel her presence the most. She entered the room, her eyes searching to see if Sarah had shown up on her own, privy to her need to talk but she didn't see her or any other ghosts, thankfully. The grey rainy day outside had her flipping on the lights in the room, but still no spirits revealed themselves. The room felt warm instead of carrying the slight chill it always did when Sarah was lingering. She frowned; it figured her grandmother would pick now not to be around.

"Sarah," she called softly. "Are you here?"

Silence greeted her ears; the room remaining warm, the lights not displaying even a hint of a flicker. Johanna moved to her desk, looking to see if her paperweight had been moved. It had been…so Sarah had been there at some point. She sighed and put it back in its assigned spot. "Sarah; I need to talk to you."

Nothing. No sign, no shimmering being, no chill in the air, no feeling of a hand at her back.

"I'm not playing games," she said firmly. "I want to talk to you; face to face just like the other day!"

When her grandmother didn't reveal herself, anger flicked in her veins. "Sarah! I want to talk to you, now! Show yourself!"

The lights flickered; a chill flooding the room as Sarah materialized in the room. "My goodness you're bossy," the ghost remarked.

"You should've shown yourself when I first called for you; you claim you're always here."

"I am always with you, darling; in your heart. I'm around a good bit, especially when you need me; but I do have other loved ones to visit as well, you know. I was looking in on Bridget; I got here as soon as I could…I'm a bit slow in the mornings."

"Why is that?"

Sarah shrugged a silk clad shoulder. "I'm not a morning person; never have been."

"Sorry to disturb you," Johanna replied; a hint of sarcasm in her tone.

Her grandmother smiled. "A bit spunky this morning, are we? I suppose I shouldn't be surprised; you had a busy day yesterday with your mother's visit…and then she joined you in your dreams last night…she wouldn't hear of waiting a day or two…you know how she is."

"Yes, I know how she is," she remarked. "I love her anyway."

"Of course you do…but maybe you should consider a nap later; you're a bit sour this morning, darling."

Johanna shook her head. "No naps; last time I took a nap, I woke up to a visitor…and unless that visitor is my husband saying he came home early, I'm not interested."

"You definitely need a nap," Sarah stated. "Now what is it that you want to talk about; apparently it's urgent with the amount of demanding you were doing."

"It's about this visitation thing," she said as she sat down in her chair and regarded the spirit standing before her desk.

"What about it?"

She arched a brow. "Shouldn't you know? You're the mind reader."

Her grandmother sighed. "I don't use that ability all the time; sometimes I like to be surprised. Now tell me what's got you so upset."

"This visitation thing…I want out of it; today."

Sarah shook her head. "I'm afraid it doesn't work that way."

"I don't care how it works; I don't want it! All that visit did yesterday was tear me apart…make me grieve for her some more…there wasn't much comforting, just a bunch of lecturing and I don't need lectures. I can't take it; it's too painful. I don't know what was worse, when my mother was saying all those things I didn't want to hear or when she left…I can't do it, Sarah."

"Yes, you can. I know your mother's visit was hard for you but it was going to be difficult no matter how it went or what the topic was. You love her and miss her; you were always going to be sad to see her go. As for the lecturing, you did need that. I told you; these visits are supposed to help you; they're supposed to remind you of who you were and still are. Your mother was pointing those things out to you but you were getting upset because you knew what she was saying was true and you didn't want to face it…you wanted what you've been longing for; her lap to lay your head on and a comforting hand and voice soothing away your troubles."

"Is that so horrible?" she asked.

"No; but it's not what you need from her right now…and in the end, she did give in a bit."

Not nearly enough, Johanna thought to herself. "Why can't I remember all of the visit in my dream?" she asked. "Shouldn't I be able to remember all of it?"

"You remember the important things; that's all that matters."

"But why were we discussing my father? Why was Jim saying that I was talking in my sleep, saying that I wanted to talk to Dad? What was it about?"

"I can't tell you that."

"Why?" she asked in frustration.

"Because I wasn't there; that was between you and Naomi."

Johanna smacked her hand against the desk in frustration. "Don't do that, darling," her grandmother said. "You'll hurt yourself."

"At the moment I don't really care," she retorted. "I want this visit business stopped. I want out of it. My emotions are all over the map as it is; I don't need the added stress."

"You can handle it," Sarah assured. "What doesn't kill us makes us stronger…and you're very strong. You'll be fine…it's good for you."

"I don't want it!"

"I don't care if you want it or not," Sarah said firmly. "You will receive these visits; there's no getting out of it and no amount of bad attitude about it will change that."

"Is that right?"

"That's right; it's like most things in life and you just have to accept it. You'll do much better with it if you don't let yesterday's emotions cloud your thinking or your judgment. It's going to be fine."

"I think I should have the right to decline."

"Well, you don't…and you'll just have to get over it. What are you afraid of Johanna? Are you afraid of who's coming next? Are you afraid that it's your father?"

"I'm not afraid," Johanna declared.

"I think you are…you're afraid it's Frank who will show up next."

"Well isn't it?" she asked. "Isn't that why he was mentioned in that dream? Wasn't that my hint?"

"There are no hints."

"Is he coming next?" Johanna asked, her tone even and carrying a hint of anger.

"I can't tell you that."

"Why not!"

"Because I can't."

"Fine, is he coming at all?"

"I can't tell you that either."

Johanna glared at her. "Should I bother asking why?"

"You can ask but the answer is the same; I can't tell you."

She scoffed. "For someone who claims to know so much, you sure as hell don't tell me anything I need to know!"

Sarah put her hands on her hips, her expression turning firm. "Don't you take that tone with me, young lady!"

Johanna smirked at her. "What are you going to do? Smack me? My mother gave me a swat yesterday; it only stings for a minute."

Sarah narrowed her eyes at her. "Don't get flippant; and if I ever do smack you, I'll make sure it stings longer. Now you just settle yourself down; you don't have control over this; you don't get to have your way. Your visitations will take place; and as I've already advised, you'd do best to go into it with an open mind and a little less attitude."

Johanna's gaze dipped to the surface of the desk. "There's nothing I can say or do to make this stop?"

"No, dear; it's out of your hands."

She breathed deeply; so that was how it was…she was going to be haunted whether she liked it or not, regardless of the emotional toll.

"Your emotions can take more than you give them credit for," Sarah remarked.

"I thought you didn't use that mind reading thing all the time."

"I don't…just when I feel like I need to know exactly what is on your mind."

Johanna raked her fingers through her hair, resigning herself to the fact that this wasn't going to go away. "Are you tormenting my husband?"

Sarah smiled. "You know I am."

"Why?"

"Because I like Jim; he's fun to toy with. I so enjoy the look on his face every time his phone plays that loud music."

Johanna couldn't help but laugh. "He's only going to be amused for so long."

"Oh I know; when he starts to get irritated, I'll stop. Like that thing with the remote, I stopped after awhile."

"So you like a good trick, do you?"

"Oh yes, I've always liked little pranks; my brothers and sisters and I used to pull pranks on each other all the time. I always enjoyed when my children did it as well. I like to have fun and your Jim is the perfect person to play harmless pranks on; he isn't easily annoyed or deterred by such things. You can inform him though that no amount of ghostbusters can make me go away; I'll come and go as I please as always…they can't get rid of me."

Johanna was quiet for a moment, her husband remaining on her mind. "What if Jim comes home during one of these visits?" she asked.

"He won't," Sarah answered. "We make sure we have the time we need."

"What if I tell him about these visits? Would it stop them from coming?" she inquired; wondering if maybe she had found a loophole.

Her grandmother smiled and shook her head. "That's a clever idea but I'm afraid it won't work."

"Figures," Johanna remarked. "He'd just think I was crazy."

"Oh I don't think that at all. I think he'd believe you."

"I'm not sure about that."

"You're free to tell him," Sarah stated. "There's no rule against it."

"It would be nice if you'd tell me who to expect next so I could prepare for it."

"It's someone you know," she replied with a mischievous gleam in her eyes.

Johanna smirked at her. "No one likes a smartass ghost, Sarah."

"Is that any way to talk to your grandmother?"

"When she's being an exasperating smartass, yes, it is."

Sarah nodded. "Just checking…and out of curiosity; what's the usual punishment for a smartass granddaughter?"

Johanna smiled and shrugged. "You have to love her anyway."

The spirit giggled. "That's not a problem…and it doesn't seem like much of a punishment either."

Silence fell but her grandmother remained in the room, watching her intently. Finally, after several minutes had passed, Johanna spoke. "How long is this going to last?"

"Not as long as you fear."

"Can't you tell me how many are coming?"

Sarah shook her head. "No; I'm afraid not. Tell me, dear; what is it that you're afraid of in regard to your father possibly being one of your visitors?" she asked gently; her tone free of judgment. "You know he's sorry."

"Yeah…but old habits are hard to break," Johanna murmured. "Being sorry doesn't change who he was."

"Do you really think he'd come to hurt you?"

"That's the thing about him; he never thought you should be hurt by anything he said. You were just supposed to take it as the gospel of Frank McKenzie…if you didn't like it or it hurt you, you were just being weak or overly dramatic. You know how it was; you saw a good deal of it."

The spirit nodded. "Yes; I saw a good bit…but you hold the truth now and that would make all the difference."

"You'll have to forgive me if I'm not so sure about that."

"I understand," Sarah remarked. "It's my fault that he turned out the way he did…if I hadn't gotten sick, I would've finished raising my children instead of allowing them to fall into Amelia McKenzie's clutches. Frank turned out to be hardnosed and carrying a chip on his shoulder the size of a boulder. Colin grew up to be an unfaithful husband and a money grubber. Margaret and Bridget somehow managed to find their way…but I hate that they all grew up under her care."

"Don't you think maybe Grandpa deserves some of the blame?" Johanna asked softly. "Don't get me wrong, he was a good man and I love him; but from what I understand, when you were gone, he tuned out a bit in regard to his children. He left them in Amelia's clutches. He moved her in and let her take control…let her teach them her bitter ways. He could've stepped in and laid down the law. He could've hired a nanny; he had the money. It's not all your fault Sarah. You didn't choose to get pneumonia and leave your children. Everyone knows that you wouldn't have left your babies on purpose."

Sadness flicked across Sarah's features. "That's all true…but a foolish mistake on a rainy day will always be my biggest regret."

"I understand that feeling," she whispered.

Sarah gave her a small smile. "Let's talk about something lighter, shall we? You choose. The last time we talked you said you should be asking me questions; do you have any?"

Johanna's gaze met hers. "You can stay for awhile?"

She gave a nod. "Yes; today I can stay awhile."

"Why?"

Her grandmother smiled. "Remember, ours is not to question why."

"Was that your favorite saying back in the day?"

"Yes…my mother always said it."

Johanna studied her for a moment. "Are you staying like this because I got upset yesterday during my mother's visit?"

"I'm staying for awhile because I can…and to help you feel more comfortable with this experience. I also thought it might be nice."

She smiled and nodded. "Yeah; it would be nice…do you want me to get you a chair?"

"No need," Sarah remarked as she moved toward the piano and pulled the bench across the floor to where she had been standing in front of Johanna's desk. "Now, what would you like to talk about?"

Johanna thought for a moment, seeing the opportunity to get to know her grandmother better. "Is there anything you secretly would've liked to have been besides a wife and mother?"

"Before marriage or after marriage?"

"Both, I guess."

Sarah grinned; mischief sparkling in her eyes as she scanned the room and then leaned closer to the desk. "I always had a secret desire to be a taxi dancer," she whispered.

"A taxi dancer!" she exclaimed with a laugh, her grandmother giggling with her. "You wanted to be a dime a dance girl?"

"Yes; I'd think about it sometimes while I was doing the housework. You know, Patrick offered to hire me a maid but I just didn't see any sense in that when I was more than capable and Mother never had a maid either; but anyway, sometimes when the work got tedious, I'd think about how glamorous it sounded."

"Dancing with strange men in a dark ballroom for ten cents a dance was glamorous?"

"Back in that day it held a certain allure…especially to a woman who loved to dance. You like to dance."

"Yes, I do," Johanna replied. "Did you know any taxi dancers?"

"Just one; my best friend's sister became one…oh her family was scandalized but she loved it and made it sound exciting. I don't know if I would've liked it…but it would've been fun for a night, I think."

"What would your mother have thought of you being a taxi dancer?"

"She would've dropped dead," Sarah replied without hesitation.

Johanna laughed. "How did you feel about flappers?"

"Well; I thought they were a plucky bunch…and if I hadn't been a married lady at that time, I probably would've been one myself in some ways."

"Only in some ways?"

"Yes; I would've never chopped off my hair like they did, nor would I have smoked or allowed a man to make too many forward advances before marriage. I do admit that I liked a nice glass of wine on occasion…and once in awhile, Patrick would give me a little sip of his brandy when he was having a night cap. I did like some of the changes to fashion…as I'm sure you can see from my dress. I loved the shorter hemlines and the cute little hats…and that it became fashionable to ditch the corset. Good lord did I hate corsets! Do you know what corsets are like, darling?"

"No; I've never been near one, thankfully."

"They're like being laced into a steel prison; it's very restrictive of your breathing as well. Thank goodness you never had to experience it."

Johanna smiled. "I'm extremely grateful that the corset died out before I came along. I remember that Grandpa was in the First World War but he never talked about it that I recall…."

"Patrick didn't like to remember the war; he saw terrible things. He just wanted to forget."

She nodded. "That's understandable. What was it like for you during that time when he was in France?"

"It was terrifying," Sarah replied. "When Patrick got sent overseas, Colin was three and Margaret was a month shy of her first birthday. I had two babies to raise without their father's input; I had to keep track of the goings on at the business to make sure the man he left in charge wasn't cheating us. I worried myself sick some nights; especially when the news was bad. I was so afraid I'd get a telegram telling me the worst. I missed him so badly. Letters were sparse…sometimes I wasn't even sure where he was in France."

"I imagine it was a great relief when he came home."

"Yes, it was…we were so happy to be reunited. Poor little Margaret didn't even remember her daddy by the time he came home. Patrick fretted about that but she warmed back up to him after a few days. Your father was born eleven months after the war ended."

"So it can be said that you made up for lost time," Johanna said wryly.

Sarah giggled. "Yes, I guess so."

Johanna was quiet for a moment as a thought came to mind. "Grandpa left me a bond you had and some stocks that were yours."

"I know."

"I cashed the bond in and used some of it for a vacation I took that summer with Jim. I remember telling Dad that I thought you'd approve of it…did you?"

"Yes, darling; I wholeheartedly approved of you using that money for a bit of fun and so did your grandfather. It was well deserved…and you even bought your mother a gift on my behalf, that lovely dining table you insisted she get. I appreciated that; Naomi certainly did deserve it; and you deserved that money. You had a good time on that vacation…you fell a little further in love with the man you were destined to marry."

Johanna smiled wistfully. "Sometimes I wish I could go back to that vacation and stay there for awhile…it's still one of the best moments of my life."

"I'm glad that you have those fond memories; I'm glad I got to be a part of it in a small way. I know that year was hard for you, especially that summer…but you found that there can be joy amongst the bad moments."

She nodded; a small smile still on her lips. "There was a lot of joy during that trip."

"There's still joy to be found," Sarah remarked. "Things sometimes look bleak to you, but I promise, there's going to be other joyful moments to come. It's going to look better one day."

"I hope so," she murmured; and then she decided on a subject change. "What was my father like as a little boy? Was he happy? Was he different from how he was as an adult?"

Sarah folded her hands on her lap. "Frank was a happy child while I was with him. He was always helpful to me; he always liked to help me in the garden and he liked to help Patrick build things. I think that's why Frank went into the construction and real estate business; he loved to build and create. If you gave him some building blocks, he'd be content for hours. He got along well with Colin despite the age difference and Margaret too…but Bridget…well he wasn't happy to have a baby sister. He didn't like losing his position as baby of the family and he was known to torment her whenever he could, despite my assurances that I loved him as much as always," she said before sighing deeply. "I was sad to see him change under Amelia's care…of course, if Patrick had been more involved in those early days, I believe Frank would've clung to him and maybe did better."

Johanna shifted in her seat a bit. "Did you ever visit him…like you're visiting me?"

"Once," Sarah answered. "He and Naomi had a huge argument one night and she took you kids and left."

"I don't remember that," Johanna interrupted.

"That's because the night of this argument, you, Frankie and Colleen were staying at your grandfather's because Bridget and her children were there and he said you all could have a sleepover as long as you behaved yourselves. You were about eight at the time; it was summertime; and when your father left for work early the next morning, she packed things for all of you, left a note and then went and picked up you kids and took off with Sophia to visit a relative in Ohio."

"Oh, I remember that trip…but I don't think I ever heard her mention the argument."

"She didn't; at least not in front of you and your siblings…but she was very fed up with things and she did a lot of thinking during that week the four of you were away. Your father wasn't happy to come home and find all of you gone…he was furious. He drank a lot that evening as he set in the house and stewed. I went to him…but he wouldn't listen to a word I said. He brushed me off as a drunken hallucination as he railed at me. I begged him to stop taking Naomi for granted, to realize that she helped make him what he was. I pleaded with him to be a better father, to love you the way you deserved to be loved and to let go of the resemblance he saw between us. I asked him to have more patience with Colleen. I asked him to stop trying to make Frankie into a carbon copy of himself. I only made him angrier."

"He wouldn't listen to you at all?"

Sarah shook her head. "All he did was rage…and demand I go away and stay away. He said that he hated me; that he didn't need a mother and he sure as hell didn't need the ghost of one. Those are just some of the highlights of what he said…it was all very hurtful," she said with a small sniffle.

"I'm sorry," Johanna replied. "I know how cruel he could be."

Her grandmother sighed. "It broke my heart."

"I know the feeling."

"I know you do. He was so sure that I was just a hallucination…and yet after you all went home, he came to the cemetery…he brought flowers and said he was sorry."

"I didn't know Dad went there."

"He didn't come often…I don't think he wanted anyone to know."

"But why?"

Sarah gave a small smile. "If they knew he came around at Christmas to leave a flower, people might have thought that he still held a measure of affection for me and he didn't want that. He didn't want to admit it to himself."

Johanna exhaled a heavy breath. "He was a complicated man."

The spirit gave a nod. "It's a complicated family."

A soft laugh crossed Johanna's lips. "I guess we wrote the book on dysfunctional."

Her grandmother grinned. "If not the whole book, at least the majority of the chapters."

She smiled and then grew quiet; still convinced that her next visitor would be Frank McKenzie. The thought of it made her stomach hurt. She may hold the truth now but it didn't mean anything had changed. Her father was sure to still be himself…after all, he claimed in his letters to have loved her from the day she was born but he had still treated her badly at times. Why would knowing the truth change that? He'd probably still think she didn't have the sense God gave a goose…and although there were times when she thought maybe he was right, she didn't want to hear him say the words. She didn't want to face any disappointment he had in her. She tried to keep him shoved into a corner of her mind but he leaked out often enough…and as terrible as it was to say or think, she wasn't sure she wanted to see him.

"What's made you so quiet, darling?" her grandmother asked.

"Can't you tell me anything that can help me deal with whoever is coming next?" Johanna asked; hating the pleading sound in her tone.

Sarah sighed. "Darling, I don't know what you want me to do. This isn't like a test where you can study and prepare for it. You just have to take what comes and make the most of it. Do you think you made the most of your visit with your mother?"

Johanna regarded her with a raised brow. "I take it from your tone that you don't think I did."

"It's not really that; it's the fact that she was trying to tell you how to handle Katie and you were somewhat dismissing her advice…as your father dismissed mine a long time ago."

"I didn't dismiss it; I said I wasn't ready to use it. There's a difference. I'm not ready to take that step."

"It's not like you haven't already had squabbles where you ended up not speaking for a few days," Sarah replied.

"Yes, but Mom's advice sounds long-term and you have to understand that long-term distance from my child is a distressing idea for me right now."

"What's more important to you, your long-term bond with her, or having a little less stress? You're already distressed about the state of things between you so what's the difference, Johanna?"

The difference was that she still had a leg to stand on, she thought to herself. Purposely alienating Katie by cutting things off for more than a few days had the possibility of being exactly what her daughter wanted. Maybe it was selfish of her, but she wanted to keep her foot inside the door. Maybe there was a middle ground; she wouldn't call and text often…maybe instead of every day, she could dial it back to every other day. She wouldn't invite her over for dinner. She'd try to be in the background while still hanging on to her spot in her life. Couldn't that work just the same?

"If she wants to push you away badly enough, she'll find a way to do it regardless of what tactics you use," Sarah remarked.

"I'm already aware of that."

"Then do some pushing of your own; just not in the manner you have been. Instead of pushing to stay close, push your boundary back as she's pushing hers back."

"And create a chasm of distance that I worked very hard to close," Johanna retorted. "Do any of you hear yourselves with this plan? Why is it always me having to do all the pushing, all the bending, all the begging. When is someone else going to take a turn?"

Sarah eyed her. "That's the whole point of you pulling back, dear. If you pull back before she can keep throwing locks on the door, you have the advantage and she has to be the one to take a turn at working to make it better."

"You don't know Katie very well."

"Oh but I do," her grandmother retorted. "She's as bullheaded as you are…as all McKenzies are really. I've never seen such a stubborn lot of people."

"She's a Beckett."

"She's part McKenzie…as you, yourself, have reminded her at times. The McKenzies…they dig their heels in, they don't like to budge when they're taking a stand. They're so damn stubborn."

"Well, I guess we can't all be perfect, Mrs. McKenzie," Johanna retorted.

Sarah smirked at her. "I'm aware of what my name is, sassy pants. Keep in mind that I'm a McKenzie by marriage."

"Oh and I suppose the Rileys were the epitome of grace, level headedness and casual demeanors…you were never stubborn, never dug your heels in…never did what you wanted regardless of what other people said, right?"

Her grandmother pursed her lips. "Did I say that?"

"I believe it was being implied."

"I assure you it wasn't."

"I think it's unfair to throw stones at me, Sarah; when I don't know what your personality was like when you were roaming this city. But I do recall Grandpa saying that you just did what you wanted whether anyone liked it or not…I have a feeling he didn't keep you on a short leash as other husbands of that time would've done. After all, I read in your diary that he never kept you from going to suffrage rallies and joining the crusade to earn women the right to vote. He managed your stocks for you but the money from them was yours to do with what you pleased. He made you learn to drive…you were the 'S' in PS Shipping' and from my understanding of what I've read, you were considered a silent partner, although in your diaries you detail that he often asked your opinion about certain business decisions. He may have left a man in charge while he was in the service but I have a feeling that most final decisions were left up to you to approve; now isn't that correct? "

Sarah smiled. "My goodness, kitten; you're bringing out your lawyer claws. Yes, it's true that your grandfather was a rather unconventional husband of the time, allowing me to be involved in certain business decisions…and yes, when he was in the war; I did have to give final approval on some matters, and I always consulted my father about those decisions before giving an answer. He didn't keep me on a leash of any sort…he knew none would hold me."

Johanna's brow rose. "Oh; that must mean you had a stubborn streak that couldn't be tamed," she replied, clucking her tongue for added affect. "Looks like Grandma has no business lecturing about something she herself is guilty of."

Sarah narrowed her eyes at her and flicked a slender finger at the bookcase, making a row of paperbacks fall to the floor.

"Temperamental too, huh?" Johanna commented. "Definitely no room to judge in that case…and you better clean that mess up before you go."

"And what if I don't?" Sarah asked.

"Then I won't be so welcoming about your presence in my home."

The spirit held her ground for a moment and then waved her hand at the books on the floor and they floated back to their places on the shelf.

"That's more like it," Johanna said, despite the goosebumps on her arms that had appeared when her books had risen from the floor.

"You still don't have the control here, darling. You're spoiling for a fight…you want to fight with someone so badly so you can release some of that tension."

"There are other methods of stress relief; my husband is always happy to help me with that," she quipped.

Sarah gasped. "Really, dear; you shouldn't be so blasé about personal matters like that."

"I wasn't giving details, just stating a fact…you're the one with four kids, so apparently you know how it works."

"I'm surprised you didn't have a houseful with as amorous a couple as you and Jim are."

Johanna shrugged. "I guess we were only meant to have one…it certainly wasn't for lack of effort although I wouldn't say we were purposely trying for another baby…but we weren't preventing it for the majority of our marriage either."

"Do you ever wish you'd had more?"

"I never used to…but sometimes I do now…and no, I don't want to discuss it."

"Fine," Sarah remarked. "We won't discuss it; there's really no need to, it doesn't take a genius to figure out why you sometimes wish you had another child at this point in time."

Her eyes narrowed slightly. "Moving along."

"Back to your need to fight," her grandmother said. "You know you'd love to have a good fight with someone. You're a woman who can be calm and composed…but you're also a woman who needs to rage once in awhile. Get angry, darling; yell at someone, throw something, get it out. You'll feel much better if you find that pressure valve and release it."

"Fine, send my father in; we'll fall into old habits in about thirty seconds and have ourselves a nice blow out."

The spirit shook her head. "No; you need to fight with someone on your plane. Quit taking things so easily. Use your claws on the people who need it, not us."

"But you're so accessible," Johanna remarked; a quirk of her lips revealing the sarcastic humor of her statement.

Sarah McKenzie pointed a finger at her. "Don't make me come around this desk, young lady. You're so much like your father. Your mother was right; part of the problem between you and Frank was the fact that you're too much alike."

"Are you insulting me because I lit a fire under your ass to get here this morning?" Johanna asked.

"No; I believe I'm trying to light a fire under yours."

"My ass has been burned by enough fires," she replied. "I'd like to keep it out of the flames for awhile, if you don't mind."

Sarah sighed. "Kids."

"Grandmothers," Johanna mimicked.

Sarah pointed a finger at her. "You're asking for it kitten."

"Sorry," she muttered; although she wasn't feel very apologetic.

"You just need to relax, Johanna; you need to relax about life in general and you need to relax in regard to these visitations. You do just fine talking to me."

"You're different."

"Why?"

"Because…I don't have a history with you. Don't get me wrong, you're my grandmother and I love you; but we didn't get to have what I had with Grandma Sophia or even with Grandpa. It makes it easier."

"You would think it would make it harder," Sarah remarked. "You'd consider me a stranger…you wouldn't be so open."

"I just feel comfortable with you…I don't know why; I just am. I loved seeing my mother…but it was also painful. Believe me, I won't want you to leave when you have to go; it makes my heart ache, but as terrible as it sounds, it won't ache as much as it did after my mother left."

"I understand that," her grandmother said softly. "It's not a terrible sentiment; we didn't get to know each other the way we should've; the way I wish it could've been. But you can be as comfortable with everyone else as you are with me; you just have to let yourself."

"I'll try to do better but I can't make any promises," Johanna replied. "But like I said; it would be easier if I knew who was coming so I could prepare."

"Darling, look at me and read my lips. I. Can't. Tell. You."

"I know, you've told me…but that doesn't mean I have to like it."

Sarah smiled. "No; you don't have to like it. If you're worried that all of these visits are going to be about your issues with Katie; let me put your mind at ease; they're not. I'm sorry that yesterday's visit upset you so much…but it's something you'll have to work through because other visitors are coming; nothing you say or do will prevent it."

Johanna sighed. "Is a new visitor coming today…or can't you tell me that?

"I'm your visitor for the day; rest easy…and really, consider taking that nap. You need it, you're cranky."

"Does that mean you're leaving now?"

"No, I still have some time. Pick a new topic and we'll go from there."

Johanna took a deep breath and exhaled slowly; forcing the tension back out of her body as she turned her thoughts to less stressful topics. She questioned Sarah about her family, about what the city had been like in her day. She asked about things she had read in her diaries, the suffrage rallies, singing with the church choir, her scraps with her mother-in-law. It was nice to talk to her like that; she couldn't help but think between questions and answers. She could almost forget that she was speaking to a ghost. When Sarah finished a story about a disastrous bridge party she had held once, she gave a small smile and rose from the piano bench.

A small ache of loss began to throb in Johanna's heart. "You have to go now?" she asked.

"Yes," Sarah replied. "But it's alright. I'll be around, you know that."

She blinked back the sting of tears. "I know…but this was nice…I like talking to you like this."

"We'll talk again," Sarah promised warmly. "And remember what I told you about your upcoming visits; just relax, there's nothing to fear. It's all going to be alright."

"I'll try to do better," Johanna said sincerely, despite still being a bit uneasy about whom the next visitor could be.

Her grandmother smiled. "I have to be going now, dear. Always remember that your grandmother loves you and would never do something to hurt you."

She returned her smile. "I know; I love you too."

"Go take that nap; you're safe from visits for the rest of the day," Sarah remarked before she faded away.

Johanna remained at her desk for several minutes after she had been left alone, the piano bench remaining in front of her desk the only sign that anyone had been there at all. She rose from her chair and rounded the desk, taking hold of the piano bench and putting it back in its proper spot. With the task completed, she glanced at her watch; it was too early to start dinner and her household work was done well enough for her satisfaction…and since Sarah had declared her safe, she headed for the door, intending to retreat upstairs to take that nap.

The next morning, Johanna took clothes out of the washer and put them in the dryer. When she finished, she tossed the next load in the washer and picked up the clothes basket full of laundry that she had unloaded when she came downstairs. She was feeling a little more relaxed; figuring that maybe she'd have one more day free from visitors; after all it had been two days after Sarah's first visit that her mother had appeared…and since Sarah had visited again yesterday, it stood to reason that there'd be a little reprieve. Adjusting her hold on the basket, she climbed the basement steps and stepped into the kitchen. Cool air chilled her and her heart missed a beat. "Oh no," she muttered. "Not today too."

Her gaze scanned the kitchen but she saw no ghostly specter. Her feet carried her to the office on their own accord, figuring that must be ghost central and that her next visitor would be there. As she entered the room, she again saw no one. Johanna tightened her hold on the clothes basket, her knuckles turning white as the air of the house remained cold despite the furnace clicking on and warm air coming through the vents. A tremor of fear slid down her spine as she stepped out of the room and stood in the hallway, listening for the sound of whoever might be sharing the house with her.

Hesitantly, she began to move toward the living room. She heard the soft sound of movement and her fear intensified. What if she was wrong and it wasn't a visitor…what if it was something more nefarious? Her phone was on the kitchen table and the gun was laying in the junk drawer in the kitchen as well. Johanna sucked in a breath and steadied her nerves…she was a fast runner; hopefully if need be, she could make it to one of the doors. Standing where she was gave her a faster track to the kitchen; all she had to do was call out and if she didn't like what she heard in response, make a quick dash through the rarely used dining room and through the door that would put her in the back of the kitchen; from there it was only a quick dash to the backdoor. Of course it would be helpful if she had time to grab her phone on the way…or even the gun…even better if her car keys weren't upstairs on the dresser. She swore at herself; from now on, her phone had to be shoved into pocket and if she didn't have a pocket, shoved into her bra if she had to leave the room…and the gun and her keys needed to be within reach at all times too. She had allowed herself to get comfortable with the safety of home.

Gathering her courage, she swallowed hard. "Who's there?" she called out.

A voice said her name, but the sound was quiet and she couldn't tell who the voice belonged to although it seemed familiar. She felt the soothing brush of a hand at her back but when she turned, she saw no one and she figured it was Sarah's way of telling her that it was alright, she was safe. Johanna slowly began to move in the direction of the living room once more. When she stepped into the living room and caught a glimpse of the visitor waiting for her, the clothes basket slipped from her hands and thudded against the floor.

"Oh my God," she murmured as she stared at the being. It was the last person she had expected to see…the last person she'd expect to volunteer to pay her a visit.

…to be continued