Hello all! So, I'll have a short note about the rating at the bottom of the chapter, but for now I'd like to give a quick warning that parts of this may or may not sound vaguely like Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett, as I've been re-reading it for about the eighth time. If you have read or re-read Good Omens, please leave your favorite quote in a review, or favorite character, or anything related to it. And if you haven't read Good Omens, but like some of the wording or tone in this chapter, then you'll probably like it, if you like a demon accidentally screwing up the delivery of the Anti-Christ and then teaming up with an angel to try to stop the Apocalypse. And funny bits. Just…just go read it, people.
"I think that possibly, maybe I'm falling for you/ Yes, there's a chance that I've fallen quite hard over you/ I've seen the paths that your eyes wander down, I wanna come too/ I think that possibly, maybe I'm falling for you/ No one understands me quite like you do/ Through all of the shadowy corners of me/ I never knew just what it was/ About this old coffee shop I love so much/ All of the while I never knew/ I think that possibly, maybe I'm falling for you..." Landon Pigg, "Falling in Love in a Coffee Shop"
It just wasn't fair. None of it was fair.
She'd spent years training and grooming to be the best little Pureblooded wife she could be. Astoria had been snatched up at the age of four by the Malfoys, but had been in the running alongside Pansy Parkinson the entire time. She'd had to wait for years upon years, primping and grooming and demurring to try to attract a worthy mate. Of course, she hadn't been lonely in that amount of time, she'd dated, but she knew none of them would ever go anywhere. It'd taken ages for the Zabinis to agree to her father's suggestion. And only then because of the stupid war.
And now where were the Greengrasses? Astoria was practically disowned, although the Malfoys were her new family anyway. Previously, once married, Pureblooded wives never contacted their birth families unless there was some sort of function to attend. Like a wedding. Or a funeral. Her father's business was flailing, and her marriage into the Zabini family was supposed to bring a large sum – not that the Zabinis knew that. And where was she?
Single.
She couldn't believe how unfair it was. And her contract idea, although illegal, was admittedly genius. How could they have forgotten to put her own name anywhere in the document? They were in a hurry, true, but that still doesn't allow for that mistake. Not even once?
Daphne, in her darkening room, perused through the contract once again. Her father still wasn't really speaking to anyone, unless it was in an angry roar, and her mother…her mother didn't really speak much anyway. It was hard to tell what she wanted, even as a child. She'd always looked up to Astoria for guidance, to Astoria for praise. And if she ever got a higher mark than Astoria had in a class, or looked prettier in a certain dress than Astoria did, that's when she got praised by her father.
He'd loved the contract idea.
There had to be something she could do to salvage everything, to reclaim Blaise and send Hermione Granger packing once more. But, as she skimmed through for the fiftieth time, there was nothing. Blaise Zabini had to marry Hermione Granger, and that was that. No room for Daphne to wedge herself in before the nuptials.
Her eyes widened and she edged closer to the parchment, a nail tapping along the lines to check and double check the plan that she was forming.
There was no room before the nuptials…but there was after.
With a wide grin, Daphne hopped up from her chair and rushed from the room, contract in hand.
"You do this every day?" Blaise asked dully, leaning against the receptionist's counter as Jacob sighed and zipped around with a clipboard and a quill hovering nearby.
"More or less," he agreed with a sigh, rolling the sleeves of his shirt up again before straightening his vest. "Sometimes I help Miss Granger take notes during meetings, sometimes I answer Floo calls or Muggle calls and set up her schedule. Sometimes it's a lazy day and I just water flowers and catch up on some reading."
"I'd prefer the lazy days," Blaise grumbled, glaring down the hallway at the meeting that was currently occupying his witch's time.
"No, you wouldn't," Jacob insisted with a laugh, "Because my lazy days are always her busy days. The woman takes a break for winter holidays, but not much else can stop her."
"Her birthday?" Jacob shook his head. "What if she gets sick?"
"She'll call off face-to-face meetings, but that just gives her an excuse to catch up on everything else," he answered with a shrug, "The woman doesn't take it easy."
"Now that certainly will not do," Blaise hummed, settling his chin on his fist and eyeing the hallway once more. "That can't be healthy to never take a break. Maybe I can convince her for all the holidays, start off slow, work our way up to her birthday…."
Jacob snorted, chuckling at him as he marked off things on the clipboard. "Good luck with that, mate, you'll need it."
Blaise chuckled back at him, nodding before a woman with a small child appeared from the hallway, a man shaking Hermione's hand and all grinning broadly.
"Thank you again, Miss Granger," the man insisted, Hermione shaking her head to him.
"Please, Jack, it's my pleasure," she smiled, turning to the woman and child. "I'll see you two next Thursday for the fittings?"
"Yes, ma'am," the woman agreed as the little girl pet her mother's hair. "What do you say, Gracie?"
"Thank you, Mionie!" the little girl, Gracie, crowed.
Hermione beamed back at her, bid the couple goodbye, and happily sighed as she collapsed into Jacob's chair and kicked her heels up. It was a day where she was dressed down, as down as she allowed herself to be, in black flats, tight black trousers, and then some aqua flowy blouse that Blaise really liked on her. She tugged her hair out of the bun and the curls sprang to life, expanding as if by magic. Or perhaps there was some magic to get it into that fierce little bun, but he was just enamored with her hair.
"So, you're all done on the professional side for today," Jacob declared from his clipboard, checking something off happily as Blaise leaned across the countertop to grin at her as she picked at her hair to get it to settle properly. She hardly noticed her assistant, however, as she was swatting off Blaise's searching fingers with small laughs.
Merlin save him, he was a goner.
"And the personal side?" she questioned, sticking her tongue out to Blaise.
"You're meeting with McGonagall in two hours, leaving you just enough time to eat lunch or frolic in a field or whatever it is you want to do with your new beau," Jacob snorted at her small glare, waggling his eyebrows at her before dodging as she swatted near him with an empty folder.
"Think we could eat lunch and go frolicking?" Blaise enquired, rearranging a few of the flowers in a nearby vase. "Actually, can we go lurking? Slytherins are much better at lurking than frolicking."
"I'm unsure of how and where to lurk," Hermione insisted with a growing smile.
"Well, we can lurk in a park, it's all terribly easy to do," Blaise insisted as Jacob contained his snickers. "You just go and do normal park things, but when anyone gets nearby or tries to talk to you, you have to scowl and glare at them and mutter things about their reputation under your breath."
"Seems harsh," she barked out a laugh, standing and stretching as Blaise tried not to follow the movement with his eyes. "Let's go for a quick bite, then settle into some first-level based lurking if we're feeling up to it."
Blaise laughed, following her out after a quick parting from Jacob, settling into her side easily down the sidewalk. Her office was situated in a quaint little spot on Diagon Alley, a few blocks down from where George's shop was to try to discourage any pranks, but still close enough to pop in to say hello. They made their way to the Leaky Cauldron, discussing the proper way to lurk or at the very least glower, when they happened to bump into others.
Hermione Granger and Pansy Parkinson had never gotten along during their school years, definitely not getting along immediately after Pansy had suggested they turn Harry in to Voldemort. Since then, they'd accepted their differences, understood the circumstances during which Pansy had tried to sacrifice her best friend, and exchanged pleasantries whenever absolutely necessary.
Blaise had never really been entirely fond of her. Simply because he was Draco's Best Friend and she was Draco's Ex-Girlfriend, as according to the Best Friend Code.
Astoria, on the other hand, had accepted Pansy's friendship, as Astoria was in the belief that one could never have too many friends, and Draco had been forced to endure their snickering on his account far too many times.
So it made sense that the two were out looking for baby things together.
Blaise had hoped he'd never had to get roped into those things with any Slytherin girl, let alone anyone similar to Pansy Parkinson.
The woman, who had vaguely maintained the pug-like face but learned the magic of contouring and smokey eyeshadow, had styled her dark hair into a fashionable bob and made sure that her eyebrows were just thin and angular enough to ensure a look of distaste. Everything seemed to be sharp points on her, and the sundress – which was admittedly pretty – seemed far harsher when worn on her.
"Hello Blaise, Hermione, didn't expect to be running into you two today!" Astoria greeted cheerfully, snagging Hermione into a hug and causing Blaise to chuckle.
"Blaise, Granger," Pansy acknowledged with small nods of the head. "Congratulations on the engagement."
"Thank you," they'd chorused with similar nods of the head.
"We were just heading over to the Leaky to grab lunch, you'd be more than welcomed to join us," Astoria offered kindly, turning to Blaise to continue, "We're meeting Draco there, actually."
The two shared a quick Look, one that all couples – platonic or otherwise – eventually seemed to get a hang of after they'd been around one another for long enough and gotten onto the same wavelength. It was one that debated the pros and cons of sitting down to eat at a table with Astoria Greengrass-Malfoy – pregnant, disowned sister to the woman who'd Screwed Things Up – Draco Malfoy, professional Scowler and Maker of Ill-Timed Comments, and Pansy Parkinson – Tried to Sell Out Your Best Friend and Savior of the Wizarding World and Life as We Know It to the Dark Lord That One Time and Really Unsure of Where Each of Us Stand with Her as of Now.
After such a Look transpired, they took a deep breath each and humbly agreed.
Draco greeted his wife first with a quick peck on the cheek and a small smile, Pansy next with a small nod of the head, and appraised Granger silently as she slowly took to bristling.
"Blaise," he began as his friend let out a low sigh, "How is it that Granger hasn't run for the hills yet? Or is it that you've already dragged her back? Certainly the latter, I'm unsure of how your own mother stands your company."
Blaise scoffed as Hermione deflated, pulling her chair out for her before sitting next to her, leaving her next to Astoria while he took the seat next to Pansy for deflection purposes. "And hello to you too, you wanker."
Astoria rolled her eyes and leaned over to Hermione with a grin, hiding her mouth from her husband with a menu as her eyes gleamed with mischief, "He's always like this to people he likes, never take offense from him if he acts like this."
"Just give him a couple of wollops if he gets out of line, but then again you remember how to do that, hmm?" Pansy offered with a malicious little smile at Draco, Hermione and Blaise stifling their giggles. Draco, in turn, settled her with a half-hearted glare, which was really the Slytherin equivalent of sticking your tongue out.
"Now, how are the wedding things going?" Astoria questioned, turning to Hermione with a genuine smile. Astoria, Blaise had always believed, had either been Sorted incorrectly or had somehow bribed the Hat, as she was always far too warm and welcoming to be 100% Slytherin. He was leaning somewhere towards bribery, as that was a much more Slytherin thing to do, which probably left her at around 20% Slytherin and then some other percentage of all the other Houses rolled into one. She was plenty smart, perhaps not up to Ravenclaw's high standards, and warmer than Hufflepuff could ever dream to be. He knew she was brave, simply because she'd stuck by Draco for so long against any naysayers. Astoria was absolutely as scary as they come because she could give you some smart idea, warm you up to it, point out that you could do it with a bit of guts, and then sit back and watch as it turned things into her favor.
"They're going well, so far," Hermione admitted after placing her order with the waiter, "It's been hard to get things going what with…well, everything else a normal couple is able to do in the span of their relationship, and then trying to plan on top of that."
"I doubt I would wait, what with, you know," Pansy awkwardly sipped at her water for a pause, "The consequences."
"Well, we do have a schedule," Blaise supplied, "We're meeting with McGonagall today to finalize some things and get her input."
Draco looked up to him curiously, "Why are you meeting with McGonagall?"
"We're having the wedding at Hogwarts, as well as the reception, and we're going to ask McGonagall to officiate for us," Hermione cut in.
Astoria was alight with this news, "That sounds marvelous! Ooh, it'd be wonderful, with the candles, and with the right set of ribbons we could really do a lot!"
"Astoria loves ribbons," Pansy snarked casually, twirling a fork around on its prongs, "Thinks they belong on everything, apparently."
Astoria glared across the table at her friend, "Ribbons are perfectly fine on baby clothes."
"If you're dressing them from the 1940s, perhaps," Pansy agreed, "Nowadays, babies are far more stylish than you seem to think."
"Why, got a brood hidden away somewhere, Pansy?" Blaise joked.
Pansy sipped at her water.
"Pansy," Astoria gripped the table, staring down her friend as Draco scooted his chair a little bit away from the table. "Are you…?"
Pansy scoffed, "Please, as if I would do that to my body. No offense, Astoria, but have you seen what childbirth does to you? No, I'm not pregnant." She looked to her glass as the table seemed to stare at her, "My girlfriend is."
They all fell silent with this news, the couples exchanging numerous Looks, and Pansy simply stared each of them head on.
"Who is she?" Draco asked.
"Cho Chang," she answered, which then set Hermione into a fit of giggles. The entire table then turned to stare at her as she tried to catch her breath and started waving at Draco.
"Ma-Malfoy, you – you've got something in common with Ha-Harry," she giggled breathlessly, "You – you – your first girlfriends are – hehe – "
The one to pick up, funnily enough, was Astoria, who began laughing herself, "Oh-ho-ho, Draco, oh…oh no…"
Next was Pansy, who tried to stifle her laughs into her fist to no avail, "I never thought of that…that's…"
Draco, in turn, turned a marvelous puce color and glared at the Gryffindor who started it all.
Blaise cracked up and got everyone laughing louder.
Once everyone had calmed down, Hermione wiped at her eyes and turned to Pansy.
"How is that working, did you try artificial insemination?" she asked with a sniffle.
"Something like that," she answered while trying to smother a grin, "A magical branch of that. We…" She sobered, picking at her napkin, "We lost the first two. With me. Cho tried it and it stuck. She's four months along, by now."
"Congratulations," Hermione stated warmly, "The odds are far worse without a magical safety net. Tell me, how does it work in wizarding terms?"
"Oh, they take bits from the magical core, to get both parents', erm…" she faltered, "Dee-nay, or something."
"DNA?" Hermione supplied.
"Yes! That one," she nodded along, "Cho's wanting a little girl. I'd be fine with anything, perfectly honest. We want it a surprise, though."
"That's wonderful, Pansy," Astoria insisted, "But why did you never tell us you were seeing somebody, let alone serious enough to have a baby with them?"
Pansy sighed and reclined back in her chair, watching as Draco's face slowly faded back to its milky color, "Because…I was in enough shit with my parents, and didn't want to ruin things with you lot too. Once they figured out I could produce a legitimate heir, they started crabbing at me to make her a Parkinson." She frowned at Blaise, as Draco still wasn't looking in her direction just yet, "Now I see why you boys were always complaining about dating bullshit."
Blaise slung an arm around Hermione's shoulders and grinned back at her, "And see? I got everything all settled out for me, and it worked wonders."
"You just have to be a lazy little shit and things just fall into place for you?" Draco pouted, still not over the newest revelation that he had something in common with Potter.
"Well, he did have to put up with Daphne for ages, I think he's entitled to something good by now," Astoria snorted daintily as Hermione was awed into silence, Blaise happily rubbing in a little heart on her shoulder blade.
"Isn't there a baby clause in that thing?" Pansy questioned with a narrowed gaze, "Two in however many years?"
"Yes," Blaise, Hermione and Astoria chorused.
"And…did it say anything about miscarriages?" she continued, settling down with that somber stare as her gaze flicked from Hermione to Astoria.
"It…it didn't mention anything, no," Astoria supplied as Draco began scrubbing his hands down his face.
Suddenly put on the spot in such an unwanted topic, Hermione began to fidget.
"I mean, it shouldn't take you years if you start going at it like bunnies," Pansy insisted casually, "Just…when you're ready, and want to check the, err, pipes, I'll set you up with our Healer, if you want."
"That'd be very nice, thank you, Pansy," Hermione nodded, smiling at her as she ceased her fidgeting, as she sensed the conversation was coming to a close, "I'll let you know whenever we're ready."
"No problem," sipping at her water again, Pansy finally decided on something, "Hermione."
Lunch continued and ended, compiled of mostly baby talk from both Astoria and Pansy, while Draco and Blaise sat off to the side and simply nodded when either one glanced their way to look for some sort of approval, although they really weren't sure what half of these things were, seeing as they didn't have the proper parts.
Hermione, on the other hand, was silent, simply watching the conversation flit over her head and making no move to grasp at any particular strand of it. Seeing this as odd, Blaise tapped her hand under the table during a lull, and looked at her curiously.
She gave a soft smile, a small shrug, and went back to her grilled chicken.
"Talk," he instructed as soon as they'd bid everyone goodbye and set out on the sidewalk again.
Hermione seemed to collapse in on herself, rubbing at her arms and staring ahead of her, lost in thought. "It's…difficult, trying to fit myself into that…that idea that it's going to be us very, very soon."
He nodded, reaching for her hand, completely understanding what she meant. It was much like filling in for someone else's role – you were expected to do all of the same things as them, but you were entirely unsure how you were to exactly go about them, and you were very unsure about whether or not you'd had the proper training to be going about and doing this.
"We're going to take things as they come, alright?" he asked, waiting for her small nod and careful smile. "First marriage, then baby carriages."
He didn't even mention the bit about love, because he was fairly certain where he stood on the matter, he just wasn't entirely sure he wanted to hear about hers just yet.
So she relaxed, gave him a grateful grin, and they proceeded to annoy the fuck out of George for forty-five minutes before being shooed out and forced to attempt to lurk at a nearby park, which then turned into fifteen minutes on the swings.
I've decided to split this chapter now, because…well, because I'm tired but want to update.
Anyway, about the rating change – I've decided that I will turn this story into an M rated one eventually. Right now it's a bit too early to go about slinging schlongs and what have you, at least too early for my liking. I'll wait until it's ready for it to change the rating.
BUT it has come to my attention that many people (who are not sinners such as the rest of us) (good on you, by the way) are not comfortable with continuing with the story if the rating bumps up. And I don't want people to stick around for, ohh, let's ballpark 30 chapters, only to never get the conclusion they deserve just because there's bits in it that they don't want to sully their minds with. My solution? Simple:
I'll create another story, but start it at wherever I bump up the rating. So, if chapter 20 is the last of the innocent chapters, I'll create another story where it starts at chapter 21. Make sense?
If anyone has any questions about this nonsense, please feel free to PM me, as I may get back to you faster that way. Er…actually, maybe not at all that fast, as I only ever log in to update something…Heh. Just, uhm…patience, and all that, when it comes to messages.
Thank you for reading this lengthy message! And thank you even more for reading this chapter! I would love it if you would take the time to review! Anyways, I'll see you next chapter!