Part 14

She walked through most of the large store before she found him, stretched out on a bench in the gardening section, asleep. A tall, skinny kid, probably seventeen or eighteen years old, was lurking close by and Maria had a feeling that he had been on the receiving end of Michael's temper.

"You here to get him?" he asked nervously.

"Yeah." She smiled when the kid let out a relieved breath. "Was he rude?"

"Well, I tried to tell him he couldn't just sleep on the merchandise and he threatened to remove my balls and shove them down my throat, so yeah, I'd say he was rude."

Maria bit her lip and refrained from commenting when the kid's voice squeaked, knowing he was doing his best to sound indignant. "Why don't you go back to whatever you were doing and I'll get him out of your department, okay?"

"No problem!"

She really thought about finding a case that housed cold bottled water and just dousing him with it, but they still had to go grocery shopping and he was already in a bad mood, so she settled for moving behind the bench and giving it a hard shove. She stepped back and leaned on the cart when he jerked upright and grabbed the back of the bench to keep from falling on the floor.

I should've known, he thought as his gaze quickly zeroed in on Maria. "What the fuck do you want now?"

Maria smiled sweetly. "Your credit card."

"Does that mean you're finally done? We can go now?"

"Yes, we can go… grocery shopping."

"Whatever, let's just go."

Maria followed him to the registers, doing her best to ignore his grumbling. She had a feeling it wasn't going to get any better at the grocery store. More than an hour later, she had proof that she was right; he had made snide comments about everything, insulted and offended numerous shoppers, and he was currently eating donuts out of a package that he had opened without paying for it.

She was discussing the freshness of the different types of fish displayed in the seafood case with one of the employees while Michael leaned on the cart and stuffed his face with junk food.

"I'm not eatin' fish," he announced after she made her selection and the man behind the counter moved to wrap the fish in heavy white paper.

"Fish is good for you, and you will eat it." She shook her head and wrinkled her nose in disgust when he turned to look at her, saluting her with the donut in his hand before sticking his tongue in the center and wiggling it around suggestively. "Are you aware of how juvenile that is? No woman is going to find that the slightest bit erotic."

He shrugged carelessly.

"Michael Guerin!"

Maria cringed when a tall, slender brunette slinked up to him and quickly struck up a conversation. It was obvious by the expression on his face that he didn't have the slightest idea who she was, but he was playing right along and the woman was totally buying his act. She stalked over to the cart and slapped the wrapped fish down right in front of him.

"Maria!" he yelled, irritated at the interruption. "What the fuck?"

Maria tried to control her irritation with him and the situation, but it was no small task. A woman he had fucked, what a big surprise. Not that it was any of her business. Nope, not at all. "That takes care of all the meat; we need to move on to the fresh fruits and vegetables."

"I'm busy," Michael snarled. He turned back to the other woman and sized her up. Nope, didn't ring a bell. Oh, well, no problem; he'd fuck her a second time. A man had needs and if that Maria girl wasn't gonna help him out in that area, it wasn't like there was a shortage of hot chicks… any chick would do.

Unaware of Michael's uncharitable thoughts about her, the poor girl hesitated before speaking. "I'm sorry," the woman said, her gaze bouncing between them. "You're - "

"Nobody," Michael interrupted, shoving Maria away. "She's nobody important… she's just uh… she's a…" He glanced at the cart as he searched for an explanation for her presence. "Nutritionist. Yep, nobody important."

"Uh-huh," the woman said, sounding uncertain. "Well, you have my number; don't lose it in the wash next time, okay?"

He grinned like a fool and his gaze slid over her appreciatively as she turned to walk away. He looked down at the tiny slip of paper she had placed in his hand. "I won't, Tina."

"I won't, Tina," Maria mocked, drawing his attention.

"Jealous?" he taunted as he crumpled up the piece of paper and threw it on the floor.

"Of what? My Michael wouldn't have given a cheap tramp like that the time of day." She snorted. "That white trash makes Courtney look a winner, and you have no idea how much work that takes. You don't even know who she was, do you?"

"Who cares? She remembers me; that's all that matters." Michael thumped his chest. Ooooh, yeah, she remembered him! He was a sex god; women would kill to get in his pants. He was THAT good.

Maria couldn't help feeling nauseous as she watched him parading around like a rooster. How could that… that copy of her Michael be so repulsive? He couldn't possibly share the same DNA as her Michael, it just was not possible. There was something off, here! "You're disgusting. Now, come on, we need to get the fresh produce before we leave."

"I need a bag of chips." He yawned in disinterest and turned back in the direction they had already covered to retrieve a bag of chips. "I'll catch up in a minute."

Maria rolled her eyes and looked over her list, frowning when she noticed that they hadn't picked up salad dressing, trying her best to forget the pig accompanying her. She checked to make sure they weren't missing any other items before walking back a couple of aisles and scanning over the variety of flavors available. She was reaching for two separate kinds when she noticed Tina standing at the opposite end of the aisle.

"Tina, right?" she asked as she neared the other woman.

The woman looked up, startled. "Oh, hi, you're Michael's… nutritionist, wasn't it?"

Maria was jumping for joy inside because Michael's weak explanation for her being with him provided her with the perfect revenge. "Yes, well, that is part of my job as his nurse."

Tina frowned. "His nurse? You don't look like a nurse."

"No, but he requested that everything remain as normal as possible for appearances' sake. He doesn't like to seem weak," she said, her voice low as if she were sharing the information in confidence.

Tina opened her eyes wide, interested. Juicy gossip! "He's sick?"

Maria looked to her right and then to her left, as if she was watching for anyone who might be listening to her. She got close to the other woman and spoke in a low voice. "Normally, I wouldn't divulge this type of information regarding a client, but it seemed as though you had a past relationship… am I correct, or was I reading the situation wrong?"

Starting to get worried, Tina corrected Maria. "I wouldn't exactly call it a relationship; we just hooked up for a night."

Maria nodded and patted the other woman's arm in a consoling gesture. "Don't feel bad; I'm afraid there are simply too many women out there who have had one-night stands with him, and he didn't remember any of their names either. It surely would have made it easier to find them and let them know that they should definitely get tested."

Tina completely forgot that she had just been insulted when she heard the words get tested. "Tested? For what?"

Maria looked around under the guise of ensuring their privacy, once again. She felt like an actress on stage and she was starting to love that. She smiled inside at what she was about to reveal to the brainless girl. "Trichomoniasis," she whispered. Thank God for Sex Ed class in high school. "I'm afraid for Michael it may already be too late; in rare cases it causes impotence in men." Okay, she had just thrown that in because he was being an asshole and she was getting tired of women coming up to him because they remembered how good he was between the sheets. "It's important to get tested if you've had sex with him any time within the last two years."

Gasping, Tina grasped her shirt as she tried to not panic. Oh, God, that son of a bitch had infected her! She was going to die, oh, God! She breathed deeply for a few seconds and asked the kind soul who was going against the medical rules to give her a chance to live. "Can you even say this stuff?" she whispered back.

Maria shook her head sadly to indicate that she shouldn't be revealing such privileged information. "Would you rather not know? Technically, no, I'm not supposed to tell you any of this, but it's so important to get treatment if you've been exposed. Michael's in therapy for his… problem, but there's no guarantee that he'll recover from his infection."

Tina practically ran from the store and Maria walked back to the cart, dressing in hand. She was smiling widely. She sooo deserved an Oscar for her performance! If she was lucky, Tina was a chatter-box and was going to blab "the truth" in any bar Michael used as his hunting ground when he was on the prowl. Ha, let's see if he could get laid with that rumor going around, Maria thought with glee. She didn't feel guilty in the least. Michael had used women like Kleenex for years, and she, Maria DeLuca, was going to avenge the fairer sex.

Michael was already there, unaware of Maria's most recent stunt. He was leaning on the cart and eating from an open bag of potato chips. "You are aware that grocery stores do not appreciate it when people do that."

"Like I fuckin' care. I'm gonna pay for it anyway, so what's the big deal when I eat it?"

"Your behavior is despicable." Says the woman who just told a horrible lie about him, she thought with a wide grin. She really didn't feel bad about it though, not even a little; he was a bastard and he deserved it.

"How come you look like you know somethin' I don't?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Maria said as she headed down the last aisle.

"Uh-huh," he muttered, his tone disbelieving. He pushed the cart along behind her, and shook his head when she began debating between iceberg, romaine, and some other kind of lettuce. "I'm not eatin' that. I already told you I don't eat any of this crap."

"It won't kill you to eat healthy for a change, Michael."

"Not eatin' it," Michael replied, full of self-confidence. Maria might be hot, but no hot girl was going to force him to abandon the food he loved so he could eat fish and salads.

She chose to ignore him and selected several different varieties of bell peppers, fresh jalapenos, onions, and tomatoes. She collected a large bag of potatoes and studied the squash before deciding she didn't like the way it looked. She reached for a cucumber, checking the skin as she squeezed it to make sure it was firm, and she froze when she felt his eyes on her. She knew what was coming, she just knew he wouldn't be able to resist.

"I'm bigger," he announced proudly.

She rolled her eyes to the heavens above. Disgusting, he was just disgusting. "God, do you think you could muzzle your filthy mouth for five minutes?"

"Doubtful." He shuffled along behind her when she started bagging different fruits and he frowned when she reached for a kiwi. "I'm not payin' for that," he denied.

"Have you ever tried it?" Maria asked.

"It's got fuckin' hair all over it!" Michael protested vehemently. Who would eat fruit with hair on it, for God's sake?

"We're buying it," she snapped, shoving half a dozen in a plastic bag and placing it in the cart. She went after the peaches next just because he had pissed her off. "I suppose you don't eat these either."

"They're furry." What was she going to suggest he add to his diet next? Sushi?

"Good, we're getting half a dozen of them too," Maria decided, unmoved by Michael's protestations.

An unsure voice interrupted them. "Um, excuse me… ma'am, sir?"

They both turned to look at the clerk who had approached them, shouting "What?" at the same time.

Swallowing audibly, the poor man tried to appear firm. Never show your fear, right? "You're causing a scene and it's making some of the customers uncomfortable. I'm gonna have to ask you to - "

"We're leaving," Maria said, grabbing Michael's arm and pushing him towards the cart before he could get into an argument with the clerk. "We've been in here for over two hours; do you really wanna have to come back and do this again?"

That question succeeded in reining Michael in before he could do anything else that would result in them getting kicked out of the grocery store without making a purchase; he wasn't interested in repeating this experience any time soon.