Chapter Thirty-Four
When You Feel My Heat
Look Into My Heart
It's Where My Demons Hide
It's Where My Demons Hide
Roughly about 11:30 on 09/12/2011 Monday
"You know you can't keep me here against my will." Eliot insisted as he stood just inside the bedroom doorway eyeballing Kat while she was in the kitchen making their lunch.
His vision was starting to spin, and he was working hard to keep Kat on an even Kiel as she moved between the counter and refrigerator. He knew if he let her slide off the planet, she'd be pissed at him, so he was putting his best effort in keeping her upright and standing, which was damn hard. The woman didn't seem to stand still for long; it was like she knew he was trying his damnedest to keep her still, so she was working against him.
Kat turned to face him, smiling wickedly at him and he knew she was enjoying his suffering just a little too much for his liking. Yep; the woman was doing this on purpose, damn her.
"You're about to either pass out or throw up right now, so I'm not even going to give you the satisfaction of having this argument again today." She stood there her arms crossed giving him that look all women seemed to master regarding men. That look Eliot had seen too many times.
"I'm not going to pass out." He grumbled at her as he moved to stand up straighter to prove his point. "I'm just tired."
He thought it was some female breeding thing as she continued to look at him. His mother had had that look and Emma had it; and what's more most of the women Eliot had known had that look down pat. The look that told him and all men that they didn't believe a word they said and were just going to humor them. "Right. "She mocked him as she grinned now. "You've barely been off all the machines for three full days and you just started eating solid food yesterday. You hardly can make it to the bathroom by yourself; and I'm not about to let you leave here until I can trust that I won't find you passed out two feet past the front porch."
Eliot's eyes narrowed as he forced himself to remain upright and not sway. He wasn't succeeding too well he knew, but the woman was beginning to really piss him off; again. "As soon as I find some real pants and shoes, I'm out of here and there is no way you can stop me." He looked down at the scrubs she'd given him that morning after he'd allowed her to help him clean up a little.
He liked the woman, he really did, but there was no way he was going to let her give him a sponge bath without reacting to her, and she wasn't letting him stand in the shower on his own, so they'd compromised. She'd cleaned his top half and he'd done the rest himself while she waited just outside the closed bathroom door.
Kat had removed him from the pluerovac three days ago just after he'd gone 24 hours with no major breathing problems, and he'd convinced her to let him sit up and slowly start to move around. He needed to get his body under his own control because he knew he couldn't depend on help when he needed to find Evan and make sure his team was safe. Eliot knew that this wasn't over even if they were safe for the moment. They were in a remote area with no way to contact anyone if Evan were somehow able to find them, and with him being sidelined, he knew Kat couldn't fight Evan.
Eliot knew that the woman had done something to the Doctor; but he hadn't asked her since that first time in the ambulance. He knew she'd taken care of the man and while that didn't bother him in the least, he wasn't sure she could take on Evan. She may have had help with the doctor, and she may not have, but Evan was a different story. Eliot knew that safety was a fleeting thing and just how safe they were could change at any moment, so he needed to get his body to listen to his brain. He had to be ready and after everything Kat had done to help him, he wasn't going to let anything get to her, no matter how mad she made him.
"Oh, don't worry, I won't stop you, because like I said, you probably won't make it far before you fall down and can't get up without my help." Kat turned back to the cutting board, where she'd been carving the leftover ham that she'd made for her dinner the night before. She didn't notice as Eliot, while he was still slightly dizzy, had managed to move up not far behind her. She was in the process of making them some sandwiches and was totally oblivious to the man's movements until she quickly turned back with the knife in hand. "Besides-" She gasped as she suddenly felt the knife being pulled from her hand and it clattered to the floor as the hand that once held the weapon was now imprisoned in Eliot's.
He reached out and with a speed she couldn't believe he was capable of, he managed to capture both of wrists and bring them behind her to hold her trapped between his chest and his hands around her holding her hands in a very strong grip behind her back. They stood there, him grinning at the surprise on her face before he brought his lips down to capture her mouth.
The kiss was hard and deliberate, and it was meant to let Kat know that Eliot was not weak, but instead all it conveyed was the fact that he wanted her. Wanted her more than he'd ever wanted any other woman; even Aimee he thought with mild surprise. He pushed against her which only pushed her against the kitchen counter pinning her there between the cabinet and his body.
She didn't struggle, she was too surprised at his speed and ability to overtake her so deftly. She could do nothing but moan as she felt the man holding her so close. She pressed her lips back to his opening them slightly to let another moan escape; and it was then his tongue moved over her lips to caress the inner reaches of her warm mouth. She felt his breath hitch ever so slightly, but it was enough for reality to snap her back.
She pulled away quickly as she stared up at him. She could feel his heart beating against hers, and while she didn't notice any change in his breathing, she could feel him shaking ever so slightly. She tried to pull her hands free, but he held tight. "Eliot?" She whispered with uncertainty. "Are... you can't be doing this." She managed to get out.
The man just looked at her with a quirky grin on those damn lips of his. She was mesmerized by them. They were wet from the kiss and she couldn't help but stare at them in her fascination. "No maybe not, but I'm going to. If I fall, at least I'll have the pleasure of pulling you down with me." And with that he bent down and captured her mouth once again.
He felt the dizziness ebbing away as he let his brain stop working to fight it. He closed his eyes and just took in a deep breath from Kat's green apple hair and he worked until he was able to get her to open that damned mouth of hers again. This time he didn't allow her to pull away as he moved one hand to hold both of her wrists in one large hand while his free hand moved to cup her neck holding her close to him. He ran his fingers through the hair at the nape of her neck and drank in everything about her.
The way her hair was so soft and smelled, to the way her body seemed to fit perfectly against him. Her wrists were so small, he marveled at the way they fit in just one of his. He moved his tongue throughout her mouth taking in every curve and angle. He moved back to deepen the kiss as he pulled her even tighter against him. His free hand now moving to reach back and cup her ass.
As soon as his fingers moved over her backside, that was when she gave up fighting what was happening between them and instead of trying to keep her body up against the counter to avoid his wounds, she instead pushed into him hard. She pushed up against him causing him to react to her. As he felt his body's instant reaction to just the touching of body to body, he felt himself moaning in response to her.
He slowly released her wrists and was pleased to feel her wrap her hands around him pulling him closer and closer, until she managed to move a hand between their bodies and down to move over his erection. He managed to hide the gasp at her touching him, but he could not stop himself from now moving his free hand to gently push up the tiny black tee shirt she wore until his hands were moving over her bare skin. He pulled back from her just long enough to pull her shirt over her head as she moved to allow him to remove it.
Just as he tossed the shirt over the ham sitting on the counter, he felt a slight tug and painful response in his chest to the movement, and he wasn't as successful this time in hiding these small painful twinges he'd been having all day.
The mood instantly changed when she realized he was in pain. "Damn it, Spencer! You're in pain and you're trying to hide it, aren't you?!" She pulled out of his grasp and reached for her shirt, but before she could put it back on, Eliot grabbed it again and this time he tossed it over his shoulder towards the living room.
"I may be in some pain..." He winced again at another stab of pain in his chest, but it wasn't as bad as it had been earlier. The pain, while it hurt, was not the worst pain he'd ever felt. He knew it was just his body reacting to his trying to push it beyond its limits. "I'm fine, trust me." He managed a small grin as he bent to try and recapture her mouth.
"Oh no you don't. Not this time." She avoided his descending lips and tried to push him gently, but firmly away from her, but he didn't budge. She looked up at him as she tried again to get him to move away. "Move your ass, Spencer!" She was getting mad at the man for lying to her as well as getting her this worked up. "Move!"
Eliot just stood there pushing even harder against her to keep her in his hold. He didn't try to grab her hands or restrain her, but he wasn't moving either. And he was just smiling that damned irritating grin of his. She reached up and tried to get a hold of his shoulders so she could move him, but he anticipated her move and twisted his body slightly and dipped down to suddenly grab her and toss her awkwardly over his shoulder.
"What the hell are you doing? Are you crazy? You're gonna bust all your stitches and start bleeding! Put me down!" She started to struggle against the hand he was using to hold her tightly to him as he turned to walk towards the bedroom. She watched the kitchen moving farther away with each step.
"Stop struggling and I won't hurt myself. I thought you wanted me to get better?" He mocked her as he reached up his free hand and gave her butt a firm slap.
"Stop that! And of course, I want you to get better, but not by having sex as soon as you're able to stand up longer than a minute at a time!" Damn it, she thought That's all she could think to say, but just damn it over and over in her head. He really made her mad right now.
"Well, that's just it, I don't plan on standing too much longer and I'm hoping I can talk you into doing most of the work here, sweetheart." He grinned as even though he felt the pain of carrying the woman, he was finding it funny that she was having an internal struggle to avoid hurting him. She wanted to fight him because he was hurt and realistically, he shouldn't even be thinking of sex right now, but she was also trying not to fight him, because she either didn't want to add to his pain or she was wanting him as much as he wanted her. Eliot knew it was probably a bit of both, but he was so hoping the later was what won out in her decision to restrain herself.
"Eliot Spencer! When I get the chance, I am so gonna get you back for this!" She yelled as he made it to the bed and he none too gently let her fall from his grasp and land on the bed.
He smiled at her as he slowly moved to pull the scrub top over his head and toss it aside. He reached out to gently touch the bandages that covered three spots on his chest. The bullet wounds and the pleurovac wound. The holes were all stitched under the padding, but while they were padded, he knew that any accidental bump to any of them would cause bleeding and he so didn't really want to bleed out. But he also wanted this damn woman more than any other woman he'd ever been with. He reached for the drawstring of the pants and pulled the loop free, but before he could hook his fingers into the material, he felt Kat's hands over his.
"Please Eliot." She suddenly was up on her knees looking up into his eyes as she held onto his hands. "Please, don't." She was looking at him with worry in her eyes. "I can't let you do this, even... even if... I want you to."
Eliot looked deep into her beautiful green eyes and he couldn't help how his body continued to react to her. "I want to." He pulled his hands from hers and captured her face in them. He bent down and gently kissed her forehead and then rested his forehead against hers. "I want to do this more than anything I've ever done in my life and while I know I shouldn't, I can't control my body at all here. I've got... I've never... damn it, but I want you and I can't control my reaction to you anymore." He pulled back and stared into her eyes. "I need to do this. Not just because of my body, but because I need to know I'm..." He trailed off as he tried to let her know that these last few days, he'd been feeling useless, not like himself.
He'd been hurt a lot in his life and he always got back up and fought through the pain. He was Eliot Spencer and he didn't let someone fight for him. He needed to know that at least one thing here he would be able to control.
"You need this because you're who you are." She reached up and put a hand gently over his heart close to the bandages yet not touching his wounds. "I know and while I understand that, I really do, I just... I'm just scared...for you."
He moved one hand from her face and reached for her hand and he moved her hand to cover the bandages. "These will heal Kat. I will heal. You've done your job; you've kept me alive and now I need you to understand that while I appreciate it, and even love you for it, I need you to also understand who I am. You know how your brother was and you know how Quinn is. We're all the same; we need to be in control of our own bodies, and we have to heal quickly. We have to be able to move because we know letting someone take care of us for too long could get others killed. It's not just a military thing, Kat. It's not even a soldier thing. It's a... I can't explain it, it's just a thing." He covered her hand and kept it pressed to him. "I may bleed, I may have trouble breathing, but I will live, I promise you that. I'm not going to die just because I'm gonna make love to you, darlin'."
Kat looked into his eyes. No, she did understand. It was the same for her. Even though she knew her husband was dead and couldn't hurt her, it had been a long time before she'd been able to give up control over herself to others. It had taken years for her to trust anyone to watch over her when she couldn't. And even though she had given up that control, it was only to three people she truly trusted. Sam and Bella were two and Quinn was the third. She knew what Eliot meant, and what he was saying in just letting her take care of him these past few days.
"You're wrong, it is a soldier thing, but not like a soldier that belongs to Uncle Sam. It's a person who needs to fight just to survive the things we all carry with us every day. We all fight battles Eliot. Every day in every way and I know what you mean. I don't trust easy either, so I get it." She pulled her hand away and reached for the sides of his scrub pants. As she worked her fingers inside the waistband and began to slowly pull them down for him, she replied, "I'm going to do all the work then, that much you can give up, but I fully expect you to fulfill your obligations here Spencer or you will be in even more trouble." She slowly grinned up at him as she pushed until he was able to move to let the pants drop to the floor on their own. He wasn't wearing any underwear, so he just stood there until she reached out and pulled him into a deep kiss and worked her way off the bed to turn and mov until she had him down on the bed in her place. "I mean it Spencer, I really do. And if you end up trying to die on me for letting you do this, then I'm gonna kick your ass."
Eliot smiled as he watched her undo the button on her jeans and let them fall to the floor next to his pants. Before she could reach behind her to undo her bra he was up and helping her with the remainder of her clothing. "Don't worry, I'm not going to die."
While she felt Eliot move to take one nipple into his mouth, she smiled over his bent head. "No, I don't think you will. You're too damn stubborn." And with that she couldn't keep her mind on anything, but what the man was doing to her with his tongue. Damn it, she thought once again. This man was going to be her undoing and it was in that instant, she realized something else that totally took her breath away.
She had taken it upon herself to save this man, but in this moment as she felt all her inhibitions fall away, she realized that it wasn't her doing the saving anymore. No, she finally let everything fall to the wayside as it finally hit her; she wasn't saving Eliot anymore, it was Eliot who was now saving her.