Chapter 7: What Can You Lose
Rachel's POV
Rachel giggled when Jesse's hand tickled her side under her sweater. He immediately took his hand away but didn't stop kissing her. Her only response was to deepen the kiss, her tongue slipping into his mouth. Jesse's hands found their way back under her clothes before resuming their way upwards. Catching a breath, Rachel pulled away for the shortest second only to feel Jesse's other hand pull her even closer against his chest in the confined space of the Range Rover. She opened her eyes and put her hands on Jesse's chest, stopping him altogether. He whimpered in protest but his hands continued to work miracles on her chest and legs, while his lips tried to capture hers in the fierce dance once more.
With a small smirk, she thought that Jesse's mother could wait for another few minutes.
Rachel kissed Jesse again, loving how perfectly relaxing that moment was after her eventful morning. For another few minutes she let herself forget about the uncomfortable position she was sitting in, the fact that the car was parked outside Jesse's house for everyone to see, or that there were people waiting for them. Jesse was the last one to protest when she ran her fingers through his curls to pull his face closer, while enjoying the fastened pace of his heartbeat and quick breaths he had to take not to cease the contact. Her own heart was threatening to escape her chest, while the temperature started to get disturbingly high and all she could think of was getting rid of her stupid clothes.
Oh boy. Definitely not something she wanted to do in the car in the middle of a drive yard.
The song in the radio interrupted their make out session. This time, Rachel pulled away with more strength and grinned at Jesse who finally realised what caught Rachel's attention. He laughed when she turned up the volume.
"Hey, that song is about me!" she chuckled playfully, humming along with the melody of Jessie's Girl.
"And she's watching him with those eyes," Jesse joined her with a smirk, looking into her eyes with a raised eyebrow, at the same time suggestively moving his index finger down her chest and stomach. "And she's lovin' him with that body, I just know it! And he's holding her in his arms late, late at night."
Cupping the back of her neck, he drew her face closer again and captured her lips once more. She nibbled at his lips softly until Jesse opened her mouth, letting her in again, their tongues tangling playfully.
A phone rang somewhere inside of Jesse's jacket. Rachel hesitated but Jesse seemed not to harbour any of such concerns. He resumed the exploration of her neck, while the phone kept on ringing. With an annoyed sigh, Jesse pulled it out but didn't pick up. Instead, Rachel felt the device being pushed into her hands.
"Throw it away," Jesse murmured against her skin.
Rachel bit her lip and, without a second thought, she answered the call.
"Jesse's phone, Rachel... um... speaking."
"Jesus, he's in Akron?!"
Alarmed, Rachel pushed Jesse forcefully away. He scowled in confusion but she only shook her head warningly. It was Rebecca and she sounded pissed. Jesse told her that she was trying to call him few times but that she gave up the previous evening. He didn't tell her that he was going home, least that he was going to talk to their dad about her. No. It probably included not answering her calls, as well. Rachel mouthed 'I'm sorry' to Jesse who finally realised who the caller was.
"Yes, he is, Becks," Rachel replied in a more calm way than Jesse's sister.
"Let me talk to him," Becks' voice adapted a more asking and polite tone.
"He's busy," Rachel threw the first thing that came to her mind, prompting Jesse to grin.
He nodded his head encouragingly but on the other end of the line his sister was losing patience.
"So? Tell him to stop whatever he's doing and take the damned phone."
"But I don't want him to stop," Rachel blurted out before she could stop herself. Her eyes grew bigger and she covered her mouth, blushing. Jesse cocked his eyebrow and laughed out loud, simply bridging the gap between them to kiss her on her lips. In meantime, he pulled the phone out of her hands, pressed it to his own ear and cut whatever Becks was telling with a curt:
"You've heard my lady. Stop calling."
Jesse hang up and turned the phone off completely. Rachel covered her face with her hands.
"I can't believe I've just said that to your sister," she laughed but not without astonishment at another short burst of boldness on her side.
"What?" Jesse chuckled and reminded her pointedly. "You've said worse things to Hudson. More than once."
"Yeah, that was to make him suffer for sleeping with my arch nemesis," Rachel pressed her face in the crook of his neck.
"Come on," Jesse patted her back with amusement. "It's healthy to tune down on your cuteness sometimes. Besides, didn't I tell you? Bold Rachel is hot Rachel."
She rolled her eyes but smiled. She was far from shy when she was alone with Jesse but talking about it so bluntly was still way outside her comfort zone. Hearing Jesse's reassurances, she felt a bit better.
"We need to get inside, Jesse, your mother's waiting," she chuckled, trying to calm her breath.
Jesse grabbed her hands and put them on his neck where they were earlier but didn't try to kiss her again. Instead, he nodded his head with seriousness which was destroyed by his next words:
"I don't want to go there," he grinned. "Can't we just sneak into my room and finish this?"
"I'm sorry, you were the one to agree in the first place," she reminded him almost coldly.
"You sound like I had any choice in the matter," he murmured.
Jesse's plane was leaving the next day in the late afternoon. Even though it was so soon, Rachel felt like it was more than just one day since Jesse had arrived at her and Shelby's place the evening before. And she shouldn't forget about the long hours she was to spend with Jesse until his flight. Maybe his weekend visits were not going to be as dissatisfactory as she had previously thought.
Rachel shook her head with resignation. She took her purse from the back seat and opened the car door. Still discontented, Jesse followed suit. He offered her his arm and she gladly accepted, trying to make sure her dress didn't show any evidence of what almost happened in the Rover.
They entered the St. James residence. Jesse explained her earlier that the party was for some of Mrs. St. James' friends who has returned recently to Akron after a few months of post-divorce therapy in New Orleans. Rachel had an unwelcome flashback to another miraculous return that she had learned about that day and she could've sworn that Casey didn't move back to Akron with her father.
"How long do we need to regain freedom?" Rachel asked quietly, looking around and squeezing Jesse's arm tighter.
She was surrounded by a mass of relatively unknown faces; some she could recognise from Mrs St. James' Saturday afternoon teas but the rest of the women were an enigma to Rachel. She never liked those women. Jesse's mom was a nice lady, a little overwhelming and snobbish but generally polite – her friends, though, couldn't enjoy a similar opinion. There were exceptions, of course, but rare.
"Ten minutes and we'll be on our way to the restaurant, I promise," Jesse's hand stroked her shoulders in a reassuring manner. He kissed her softly on the lips. "They all will be gone by the time we're back."
She nodded her head and sighed. They moved in the direction of the large living room where Jesse grabbed two glasses and poured them some water. Fleetingly, Rachel thought that it was certainly this kind of situation in which she would've preferred something a little bit stronger for once. If Rachel had doubts about Mrs. St. James' friends, then it could be easily declared that she really hated those dinner parties. She had a misfortune of participating in four of them only this summer and on each Rachel ended up either bored to death or less than pleased.
Why? The answer came almost instantly somewhere from their right.
"Jesse! Rachel, honey, there you are!"
They both turned on their cue. Jesse nudged subtly Rachel's side to remind her to smile and she grinned obediently. Oh, the small sacrifices one makes for the loved ones. Keeping a strong grip on Jesse's arm, she followed him to the small group of people in the centre. There was Jesse's mother, his father, their closest friends, Ashley and Bradley Chastens, as well as a tall lady that Rachel recognised only remotely well enough to be sure that the woman was the reason behind the occasion: Casey's mom.
"Mrs Chasten, Mr Chasten," Jesse took over the greetings for the both of them. She just smiled and looked pretty – it was safer that way. "You remember Rachel."
Ashley Chasten greeted the couple with a gracious smile, followed by her husband. They knew Rachel for years, almost since she was thirteen. Fortunately, they belonged to the grateful exceptions, that's why responded with the first genuine smile this afternoon.
"Of course, how are you, Rachel?" Ashley inquired politely. "I've heard from Marianne that you moved to Akron from... What was that little thing? Lino?"
"Lima," Rachel corrected her quickly. "Yes, few months ago, actually."
They all laughed as if she had just said a joke. Jesse cocked an eyebrow and kissed the top of her head.
"Oh, they're so adorable, look at them," Ashley gushed over them.
"Weren't they always?" another voice asked. They all turned to look at Mrs Cransen who was standing next to them but it was her slightly mocking tone of voice that made Rachel's back stiffen. "How long it was? Five, six years of puppy faces and silent gazes every time he walked into the room?"
Rachel blushed at the implication and open mockery. Even though the woman was not specific about her target, everyone could tell who the words were directed at. Rachel was used to comments about her appearance, clothes or even bossiness but this was new and more personal than ever.
And it was most certainly not the way she wanted Jesse to find out. She glanced up at him to seek his reaction but all she got was his hardened jaw. Jesse's father scowled, Ashley and her husband looked between them uncomfortably. Jesse's expression screamed fury when opened his mouth to say something but the woman continued.
"It was rather convenient to tie this up just before leaving for another state, boy."
"Excuse me?" Rachel spat immediately, without thinking. She felt Jesse's soothing touch on the small of her back but she pushed his hand away. She shook her head, ignoring four pairs of eyes drilling into her face, grabbing Jesse's hand. "With all due respect, you have no idea what you are talking about."
Jesse's mom finally found her voice but it wasn't the polite rebuff directed at the woman that Rachel anticipated. Instead, she stopped forward and laughed nervously.
"Rachel, honey, you must've misunderstood..."
"Marianne," Jesse's father tried to stop her.
"I don't think so," Jesse interrupted him. Rachel felt how he squeezed her hand, stroking the top of her palm with his thumb. "Apologise to my girlfriend."
He glared at the woman who seemed to get smaller with every second. Jesse's father threw Jesse a cold look that made Rachel swallow hard but Jesse withheld it without problem. He had years of practice.
"Jesse, stop. Alice," he turned to look coldly at the woman. "That was uncalled for."
"Jesse, please, let's just go," Rachel whispered.
The people around them finally seemed to notice the gloomy atmosphere by the hosts and started listening to them with more or less curiosity. The moment Jesse told her they were coming over to attend another dinner part of his mother's, she knew it was bound to end up horribly.
Jesse listened to her. He murmured something indistinctly to the woman before leaving, though. Rachel had no idea what he's said but the expression on everybody's faces gave her some ideas. They hurried upstairs, to Jesse's room. Rachel didn't ask why they weren't heading outside to the car; to be honest, her appetite was gone.
That was humiliating. Not only the words or their meaning, but the tone the woman had used to say them. And Jesse's mother didn't even try to stop her – here was where a sense of betrayal entered Rachel's internal battle. Not that she expected Jesse's mother to defend her fiercely against such comments but trying to pacify her by turning it into Rachel's misunderstanding? She liked to think that Jesse's parents liked her. – what happened with the whole 'last hope' that Jesse had told her about two weeks earlier? And maybe they did like her, personally, but all her good traits paled when faced up against the opinion of their friends, apparently.
Jesse shut the door closed with a loud thud. Rachel flinched at the sound but he didn't care. He was still angry but seeing her spooked expression, his own relaxed instantly.
"It's not how I planned these ten minutes to go," he raised his eyebrows and smiled apologetically. He's promised her a nice relaxing afternoon and failed. Rachel knew he hated to disappoint her.
"They love you, Rach," Jesse spoke up again, after a few seconds. "Especially my mom, you know that. It's just about her stuck up friends."
"I know," Rachel offered him a small smile. "She didn't mean it like that. Or, I at least hope so. I really would hate for her to wait a couple of years to offer me a check when someone more suitable comes along."
Rachel laughed at the joke but Jesse was serious. He was more concerned about the whole situation than Rachel.
"Don't worry, Jesse, seriously. I have you all to myself until tomorrow morning," she said. "It's more than fine by me as long as the door is shut and I won't have to be reminded about that unfortunate time of my life."
She didn't realise what exactly she's said until she saw Jesse's changing expression. But it wasn't an astonishment that she saw but an ironical smirk mixed up with some... discontent?
"Unfortunate time?" He repeated sarcastically. "Really?"
She suddenly remembered his unusual behaviour and words from the previous night.
I was a fool not to have realised sooner how amazing you are. It all now just clicked into place. She forgot about the unpleasant situation from the moment ago and focused on the issue at hand, or, quoting her male lead, the other thing.
"Oh my god, I'm going to die of embarrassment," she sighed mortified, hiding her face in her hands. "Who told you? My dads? Shelby? I knew letting you two talk when I'm not around was a bad idea."
Jesse chuckled.
"Try my family," he helped her.
Of course.
"I'm going to kill your sister," Rachel declared seriously. It had been hard enough when Becks had taunted Rachel about her crush on her younger brother not to have the girl spill the beans years after in the worst possible moment. Rachel had been planning to tell Jesse months earlier, seriously, but never got round to actually do the thing.
"Stand in line," Jesse joked but without amusement. Then he opened his arms and nodded at her wit ha roll of his eyes. "Come here, drama queen."
She walked closer and let Jesse's arms embrace her tightly.
"We can still go out if you want to," his breath warned the skin on her cheek. He kissed her temple. "Or we can just stay in for the rest of the evening."
Shaking her head, she stood up on her toes to reach his lips. He bent his head slightly and surprised her by lifting her in his arms bridal style before sealing their lips together. He brought her to his bed, sliding on top of her and gathering her in his arms. Jesse knew exactly what to do to keep his promise of making her forget about everything that was bugging her for the past few days.
She made a quick work of getting rid of his T-shirt and he returned the favour be stripping her off her dress. They seemed to get to that point awfully quickly every time they were alone, she noticed briefly before closing her eyes.
"Is it just me or the distance makes me go even more crazy about you?" Jesse breathed out against her neck, leaving a trail of soft lips over her skin. Rachel giggled, mortified at how he was able to think about the same things she had.
"Seeing each other once a month can do this to a girl," Rachel replied, stopping him just to be greeted with a confused frown that turned into a grin when she swiftly flipped their positions and straddled his hips. She had not much experience, sure, but she knew what drove Jesse crazy even more than her herself. They were still in their underwear, and jeans, in Jesse's case, so she leaned over his face and bit her lower lip. He groaned when she pressed her lips to the base of his neck – that was something that drove Rachel crazy; being able to get him to that state – and moved her head just a little, to whisper:
"And while a girl is left alone for that month, she eventually starts browsing Cosmo in search for ideas."
Jesse groaned when the meaning of these words hit him. Rachel rested her palms against his chest and leaned over him again, her hair brushing the skin. She felt his hands climbing up her sides and back, until they were about to unclasp her bra.
Unfortunately, he never managed to get that far due to the loud knocking on the door. They froze in a bit of panic, remembering with relief that the door was locked. Rachel straightened up, they both looked in the direction from which Jesse's father's voice was telling them to let him in. They were ready to ignore him when he knocked again and called through the door:
"Rachel, your mother is here. She says it's important."
This time, ignoring the totally unexpected source of interruption for the time being, they immediately jumped apart and started picking up their things from the floor. Jesse made sure Rachel's dress was back in place before unlocking the door and letting his father in, while putting on his own T-shirt. Rachel didn't wait to see the man's expression when he realised what had been going on before he interrupted them. She ran past him and downstairs to see Shelby by the door. She looked up impatiently when Rachel appeared on top of the stairs, and moved in her direction.
"Where's your phone?" Shelby asked briskly. "That boy from Dalton Academy called me half an hour ago. He said it was important and sounded upset."
Rachel's fluttered her eyes in surprise. Jesse joined them downstairs, looking with a frown between the two females. Rachel copied his expression while trying to decide what happened to make Kurt so determined to reach her since they were still not talking to each other.
"I've turned it down before the auditions. It's still in Jesse's car," she answered with a shrug. "Kurt called you?"
Jesse muttered something about the phone and disappeared outside. Shelby shook her head.
"No, it was the other boy, Anderson. They couldn't reach you for hours so he found my number in the Vocal Adrenaline papers that you've given him."
"Rach, there are like twenty voice messages from Kurt and another few from Blaine. And... seventeen texts," Jesse returned with the phone already in his hand. "Some on mine, too."
Feeling that something bad must've really happened, Rachel snatched her cell from Jesse's hands and dialled Kurt's number. He didn't pick up so she disconnected the call and tried Blaine. While waiting for her friend to pick up – hoping that he will pick up – she that saw Mrs St. James was approaching them with worry all over her face. Jesse didn't stop Rachel when she just stepped aside, letting them to answer the woman's questions.
In meantime, Blaine finally answered the call.
"Rachel! Thank God," Blaine threw out of himself with obvious relief. "Can you come to Lima today? It's Kurt... I mean, it's Kurt's dad – he's in a hospital and Kurt would really need someone else here to be with him..."
Feeling suddenly weak, Rachel covered her mouth with her hand. Burt was in a hospital? Shelby stiffened when she saw Rachel's reaction to the news. Ignoring Mrs St. James, Shelby approached Rachel with a question in her eyes but waited until the girl nodded her head, promising Blaine that she will come as soon as she could.
"Thank you, Rachel. Kurt tries to act strong but I can see that he's devastated. I would use someone to help me keep an eye on him."
"I'm on my way," she said without hesitation.
"Thank you," Blaine breathed out in relief.
"I'll call you when I'm in Lima," she promised solemnly before ending the call.
She faced the small crowd that gathered nearby, with worried Jesse on top.
"Kurt's dad had a heart attack," she half-whispered with terror, glancing quickly at her boyfriend. His eyes widened when he heard that and stopped whatever he was telling his mother, who also adopted an unusually sober expression. "Jesse, I..."
"I'm coming with you," he declared with a tone of voice that told her that she couldn't change his decision. "You're too distressed to drive. I'm not letting you go alone."
Rachel stormed into the hospital with Jesse following her hastily. Looking around, she noticed Blaine hurrying in their direction. Jesse took Rachel's hand and pulled her towards their waiting friend but she let go off his hand as soon as she stopped to hug the boy.
"How is Mr Hummel?" she asked. "And how's Kurt?"
"He's still in a coma. The doctors won't let anyone but the family see him yet. Kurt's in there with Mrs Hudson and Finn."
Despite herself, Rachel hesitated and looked back at an impassively-looking Jesse after the name of her ex-boyfriend was mentioned. Jesse shook his head reassuringly, though, and simply followed her and Blaine to the waiting room.
For some reason, Rachel expected the waiting room to be empty, since Finn and Finn's mother were supposed to be in the room with Kurt, but it wasn't the case.
"Rachel, what are you doing here?" Mr Schue stood up from the chair.
The rest of the teenagers looked up at the surprised question from their coach. Mercedes, Tina, Artie and Mike Change were sitting in a small group, whispering to each other or in complete silence. When she appeared, they all froze.
"Mr Schue?" Rachel stopped as well, looking around the surprised or, in some cases, irritated faces of several of her former teammates. "I didn't know you were going to be here."
"We were with Kurt when it happened," Mercedes explained quietly. She looked awfully tired, and her eyes were slightly red. "An emergency glee meeting."
All eyes instantly wandered off to where Tina was sitting and Rachel understood the topic subject of the sudden glee. The girl lowered her head and decided not to start any discussion, luckily. Mike Chang was sitting with her, holding her hands and stroking the top of her hand softly.
"Where's the rest?" Rachel looked around briefly, with relief failing to notice Santana or any other cheerleader.
"They were here but left," Mr Schue answered. "There was no point in all of us sitting here all day so only those closest to Kurt stayed. Blaine didn't tell us he called..."
"What the hell is he doing here?"
The new voice made everyone jump in their seats of spots and turn behind them to spot an angry-looking Finn, glaring at someone over Rachel's shoulder. Jesse took a step closer towards Rachel and put his hand on her shoulder. Rachel reacted immediately. She raised her own hand and covered his palm with her, stopping him before he managed to move away. He looked strongly at Finn.
"I'm also Kurt's friend, Finn," Jesse said seriously. "And I'm going to stay here as long as I need to support him like we all here do"
Finn didn't look convinced. But to be honest, he was one of very few people present in the waiting room that looked uncomfortable with Jesse being there. Rachel led Jesse in the direction of an empty seat and sat down next to Mr Schue, pulling Jesse to collapse on the place next to her.
Blaine whispered something to Finn and the boy went back to the room, probably to tell Kurt that they were there. He didn't come back though; neither did Kurt, so they waited. After around half and hour, Finn appeared again and told Blaine to get into the room while he stayed with their group. Rachel felt her eyes getting heavier with every minute they waited for anything to happen. Jesse's hands encircled her shoulders and he moved so that she could put her head on his shoulder.
"You should get some sleep," he noticed. "I'll wake you up."
"No, I'm fine," she protested weakly.
"No, actually, Rachel you do look like you can barely keep your eyes open," Mrs Schue noticed truthfully from his place, looking at Rachel's face with worry.
"Come on, Rach," Jesse kissed her temple. "You've been through an almost six hour long auditions, then my mother's dinner and then the ride to Lima. Go to sleep."
Opening her mouth to protest, she changed her mind. Jesse's hard meaningful look told her that any protests were doomed. Sighing, she obediently closed her eyes and let the sweet warmth of Jesse's arms lull her into sleep.
Finn's POV
Ok, so he wasn't really religious but this week has been crazy – his GC (GC stood for the Grilled Cheezus – having been so helpful so far, GC got himself a cool nickname) has been doing great job of making all the things he wanted to happen, take place. He got back his spot in the team and when the Sam kid dislocated his shoulder, the quarterback position was back to his rightful owner. Finn, that was.
Or the other day, when he swore Quinn was giving him those looks again? Sure, they weren't together or anything but he kind of needed a girlfriend right now to boost his game. Karofsky has been picking on him more often and Finn thought that if he dated Quinn again, the football team would cut him off some slack. So Finn prayed to the Cheezus and voila – she seemed to be all over him again.
Suddenly, the power of faith made Finn think everything was possible.
And seeing Rachel in the waiting room with them, even despite the stupid prick she called her boyfriend (only because she forgot for a minute that she truly belonged to Finn) whose hands were caressing her arms in a soothing manner, Finn knew that he could make this happen as well.
He wanted St. Jerk to disappear. He wanted his Rachel to see reason and realise that he wasn't worthy of her. Finn did his research and what he learned about St. Jerk made him seriously question Rachel's mental health. She, with her prudishness and all, couldn't forgive him one stupid night with a cheerleader but she could overlook hundreds of chicks that flew through the jerk's bed or car?
Finn knew that Rachel herself wasn't a virgin anymore and he still couldn't believe that she did it out of her own violi... voliti... will. Out of her own will, that is. That was so unlike his Rachel. She was always pushing Finn away when they were together. She was barely allowing him to touch her, even when they were making out. She must've been manipulated by St. James into putting out, it couldn't be otherwise – leave it to St. Jerk and he will sway even the greatest and best girl off the righteous path.
Was he forcing her against her will? Maybe she was just trapped and needed someone to help her. She probably pitied the guy and didn't want to hurt his feelings because that was just what his Rachel would do.
Finn didn't care about the reason. He wanted to be the solution.
So when no one was looking, he snuck outside the waiting room into the small bathroom to ask for another thing. He wanted St. Jerk to be gone and Rachel to talk to him and return to McKinley. GC was super-cool and effective until now, and he could do this, too.
When he returned, St. Jerk was still there, having a hushed conversation with Mr Schue. Rachel was asleep, covered by St. Jerk's jacket, not to let her get cold because of the elegant dress she was wearing. Only now did Finn see that St. Jackass was also dressed smart, in a shirt and slacks, as if they were interrupted in the middle of a dinner.
No, of course, he will not call him by his name.
Trying to look inconspicuous, he sat near Mr Schue to listen to what they were talking about.
"Six hours?" Mr Schue asked, with an undertone of slight surprise. "For auditions?"
"We never complained about the lack of candidates in Vocal Adrenaline," St. James answered with a light shrug, just enough not to disturb Rachel. "In fact, if we hadn't introduced the preliminaries – you know, a dry file readings, meetings with several people to exclude those who weren't good enough to even try out – it would take up the whole day, not only a few hours."
Finn frowned but quickly pieced everything together. That self-centred prick. With his stupid team, and their stupid candidates and preliminaries, he thought he was better than they.
"No wonder, she was barely conscious when you two arrived," Mr Schue glanced at Rachel. He then turned his head to look at Mike Chang who turned his head quickly. "But seriously? Poaching people from other teams?"
Finn glanced at Mike as well. Tina had found a file that allegedly came from Rachel in Mike's things, and along with Quinn, they went to Akron this morning and snuck into the Vocal Adrenaline auditions. They organised a sudden meeting at Mr Schue's apartment to discuss some revenge plan for trying to steal their member. Mike explained them that he didn't go there to actually audition but not everyone believed him, of course. Finn didn't care about that, though. He had his own plan of rescuing their team – and GC was supposed to help him get Rachel back. And if by some chance, Cheezus failed, they already had that weird, short Sunshine Corazon girl and Sam Evans in the team now, so their chances at Sectionals, and even Regionals, were high.
"Shelby does it all the time," St. James answered Mr Schue's last question nonchalantly. "She watches at other teams at competition or scouts middle schools in the area in search of someone extraordinary. That's how she found me before I even went to Carmel and gave me the lead from my freshman year on."
Finn moved and looked directly at St. James, who finally noticed him nearby.
"Your scouting must be really crappy since Rachel was in McKinley for two years," he snickered.
The guy cocked his eyebrow.
"Rach had a co-lead spot in Vocal Adrenaline ready for her since she was thirteen," he deadpanned. "It was her choice not to accept it until you made her. Shame she was so independently ambitious," St. Jerk glanced down at Rachel and sighed dramatically. "The show choir world missed out on a bunch of amazingly romantic and emotional duets."
Blushing furiously, not only of embarrassment but first of all out of anger, Finn jumped to his feet and glared at St. James, catching the attention of the remaining teenagers to focus on the three of them. St. Jackass was doing this on purpose, to boast Rachel as if she was some sort of trophy or the proof of his victory over Finn.
"Why are you even here? You just rile us all up by your stupid comments."
"Oh really?" he replied, his voice dripping with mockery.
Mr Schue cleared his throat, looking around and noticing that, despite Finn's declarations, St. Jerk's presence seemed to bother only him. They were looking between the two boys but no one stood up to support Finn. Finn clenched his fists – weren't his team members the fiercest St. James' haters?
"Finn," Mercedes' voice broke the tense silence. "Can you stop pushing your macho style right now? Kurt's dad needs our prayers not you two fighting over Berry."
"He's the one trying to pick up a fight," St. James scoffed.
"I think it's time for us to go home right now," Mr Schue declared out of the sudden to distract the two boys. "Finn, you should go back to Kurt and your mom."
Finn knew that the teacher was politely sending him away to stop his word battle with St. Jerk. Finn didn't like the fact that even Mr Schue was taking the jerk's side. What was with the guy to suddenly win over the love of his team mates? Slowly, everyone nodded their heads and started picking up their things. The commotion seemed to wake Rachel up as well. Finn turned when her eyes fluttered and she looked around in confusion.
"What is it?" she looked up alarmed. "Is it Kurt's dad?"
"No," Jesse calmed her down. "You can go back to sleep, babe."
"We're going home, Rachel," Mr Schue explained quietly. "You really should go back to sleep. I guess you're going to stay here until you can see Kurt."
"Yes, I will. And no, I don't want to sleep anymore," she shook her head. She straightened up and looked around, as if only now noticing Finn's and everyone's looks on her. She decided to ignore she tense mood, apparently, when she turned to look at Jesse. "Can I get some coffee, though?"
"I'll be right back," St. James didn't spare any of them another look before disappearing behind the corner.
Finn's spirits soared hearing Rachel's question. The coffee machine was far enough from the waiting room to give him some time alone with Rachel. She said her goodbyes with everyone and collapsed onto the seat again, as soon as, their friends left. Finn stood in his place, unable to decide whether it was better to really go back to his mom or stay and take his chance to talk to Rachel.
The decision was made for him, though: someone's phone started ringing and Rachel quickly pulled it out from St. Jerk's jacket and answered without hesitation, moving so that she was out of the reach of his ears.
Rachel's POV
When Jesse and Mr Schue delved into a small talk about the auditions, she didn't go to sleep despite her act. She felt his hands drawing soothing circles on her back which really helped to lessen her worry about Kurt but not enough to actually fall asleep. She didn't let them know that she could hear the hushed fight between her Jesse and Finn. Of course, Jesse noticed immediately that she was faking but let her get away with it.
Kurt was still inside, not even willing or ready to face them. Good thing at least Blaine was there with him. Kurt was strong on the outside, but as Blaine very well knew, he was a good actor – that's why Rachel was ready to stay behind even when the rest of the group decided to go home. She was also glad that Mr Schue decided to send Finn away – Rachel had enough of the two of the boys throwing glares and sneaky comments at each other.
She had no idea that Finn's feelings for her were that strong. Kurt more than once hinted at the fact that Finn could not accept their break-up even after all these months. Even after she literally moved to another city and found herself a new boyfriend. Normally, Rachel would probably be flattered but not in this case – if Jesse had an insecurity, then its name was Finn Hudson. For many reasons, Finn's unrequited and obsession-like feelings for Rachel being only one of them, Jesse was still worried that she would let him in again and leave Jesse for Finn. As if. She had no intention of getting back with Finn ever again – but she didn't need to give Jesse any more reasons to be bothered by that thought alone, as well.
Finn stayed behind when Jesse and the rest left. She almost felt thankful when Jesse's phone started ringing. She was sure she would rather talk with Becks again, than stay alone with Finn and risk another portion of longing glances and more than obvious comments.
The caller ID told her that Jesse's mentor, Nat, was the caller. Rachel didn't know him personally yet, only from Jesse's stories and she wasn't even sure Nat would know who she was. She was partly surprised, however, when in response to her voice, Nat made an 'oh' sound and called almost jovially:
"Rachel? The famous 'Rach'? Damn, you've got a great voice even on the phone."
Rachel chuckled and, in response, Finn frowned. If she was to be honest, Nat's voice screamed 'gay artistic soul' – if she could describe it like that – for a mile. He even had British accent which just made him even more stereotypical.
"Darling, can I get Jesse? I'm sorry to interrupt your date, I know you two had grand plans... Oh, God, I am not interrupting anything indecent, am I?"
He sounded only half as guilty or outraged as he should, and more than twice cheerful as it was needed, if he had in fact interrupted something. Rachel felt Finn's eyes on her when she shook her head and assured him they were not doing anything and that Jesse was not with her at the moment.
In the corner of her eye, Rachel saw a doctor entering Mr Hummel's room. Sobering up, Rachel saw that Finn followed the man into the room. She turned her attention to the call.
"Something happened, anyway?" she asked.
Nat sighed heavily and she could swear he pouted.
"Yes, love, it's about Jesse's return to the New York. I called earlier and he told me that his flight leaves in the afternoon. And I've just received a call from my soon-to-be-ex – such a lovely bastard, but also so, so bad taste in clothes... Well, he called me that out friend just came back to NY from London, you know, West End, and that he could meet with Jesse but only before noon."
Oh. Rachel looked in the direction of the exit to see if Jesse was returning but grimaced when he was a no-show. The clock on the wall told her that it was half-past seven. She calculated quickly in her head and realised that if Jesse was going to return to New York earlier, he needed to leave Lima at dawn to catch an early flight or just simply go back home without her already tonight.
"Jesse really wanted to meet Andrew – he landed a lead on his third attempt and he's just finishing his world tour, and he's staying in NYC for a day. I know you probably don't want to let that hottie of yours leave so soon, darling, but it's really one-time thing. I promise to make it up to you when you're in New York."
"No," Rachel assured Nat quickly. "I'll tell Jesse to call you straight away. And I'll tell him to go earlier."
Nat let out a relieved breath.
"You are amazing, love," he called out cheerfully. "Thank you. I hope to meet you very soon."
"You, too," Rachel answered truthfully but with an undertone of hurry.
She saw that the doctor left Mr Hummel's room. Then, she saw another movement in the door and, finally, Kurt's pale face appeared in front of her. Exactly in the same moment, Jesse returned as well. He put the cups of coffee on the small table and Rachel gave him his phone back, murmuring silently for him to call Nat, before finally running up to Kurt and hugging him tightly.
"Rachel, I'm sorry I didn't come earlier," Kurt breathed out. His voice was uncertain, he was shaking slightly. "He's still in a coma and they still don't know when he'll wake up."
Rachel released Kurt from her arms. He stepped back and wiped his red eyes, taking one deep breath and letting it out. Rachel couldn't even imagine herself in a similar situation, waiting for hours of anxious uncertainty for the smallest sign of life from her dads or Shelby.
"The doc said that you can go in now to see him. If- if you want to," Kurt added. "Thank you for coming in the first place."
"Of course, Kurt. I'm going to stay as long as you need me to," Rachel promised, daring to give Kurt a small smile. He responded with a grimace, so she quickly sobered. "I'm so sorry."
"Rach?" Jesse's voice interrupted them with hesitation. Kurt nodded at Rachel to go to Jesse, silently telling her that he would wait, and went back to the room to his dad, so she turned to Jesse.
"Screw the West End guy. I'll stay here if you need me," he declared instantly and she realised that he must've called Nat back while she was talking to Kurt.
"No," she protested. "Go back to Akron. Nat apologised enough for this change of plans, you don't have to do it again," she added with a roll of her eyes. "I'm serious, Jesse. I'll be fine."
Jesse watched her for a few seconds before finally nodding his head.
"Okay. I'll stop by your dad's place first to tell them you're in town and explain why, but you should call them too as soon as you can to get them to pick you up."
She nodded her head.
"I will," she promised, looking behind her to find Finn in the door to the room. He just couldn't give up, could he? He was watching them with a gloomy face, but Rachel turned her head to look at Jesse again. "I should go to Kurt."
"Tell Kurt I'm sorry I had to leave and that I hope his dad will be fine," Jesse murmured.
She hugged Jesse briefly but tightly. She couldn't stop a one single tear appear in her eye, when she suddenly realised that the next time she was going to hug Jesse was weeks from then. She swallowed and wiped her cheek, pulling away from him.
"Don't cry. I hate to see you cry because of me," Jesse whispered before kissing her softly. "I love you."
"I love you, too," she whispered back. She sniffed and wiped the remaining wetness off her face. She cleared her throat, stepping slightly away. "Now, really, go."
With the last glance, Jesse was gone. Rachel took a few deep breaths before deciding she was ready to go back to Kurt. He didn't need to see any more tears. Rachel was there to make it easier on him while waiting for his dad to wake up so she should push her own little problems aside.
She hesitated when she noticed that Finn was still standing few metres away. He was watching her in silence but she noticed how he glanced over her shoulder at the door behind which Jesse has disappeared. She was about to pass him wordlessly when he asked:
"Where did he go?"
"He went back to Akron. He has a flight back to New York in the morning," she explained curtly.
"Thank you, CG," she heard Finn murmur to himself. She frowned but decided it wasn't worth asking.
She didn't enter the room, however, deciding that any potentially upsetting conversation should stay away from the patient – and almost every conversation she has had with Finn since their brake-up had a tendency to get turned into a fight sooner or later.
"So he just left?" Finn sounded surprised and slightly angry at Jesse.
Rachel suppressed a mocking reply at his sudden care but resorted only to a shrug.
"I'm not five, Finn. I can take care of myself without Jesse looming over my shoulder twenty-four hours a day."
Finn scowled.
"Then why won't you come back to the New Directions, Rachel?" he fired out of the sudden, making Rachel literally speechless for another minute, which he used to continue his lunatic idea. "St. Jerk is in New York, there's nothing keeping you in Akron. We won't let what happened last year happen again. There would be no slushies and no spying bullshit. We could start over and try to build up the trust from the scratch. I know we can make it work this time."
Finally, Rachel found her voice – but still had no idea what to say to express her utter astonishment at the ridiculous plead. Coming back to McKinley to do what exactly? Carry the team solely on her shoulders until they win for the rest of them to take all the praise? To become a Lima loser again? He wanted her to give up her amazing new life in exchange for a impossible promise that she'd be treated with a proper respect by people who still hated her guts?
And the last two sentences? Rachel would rather not try to interpret them the way Finn most probably meant them. Didn't he understand that she would never trust him and the idea of building up anything with him made her nauseous? Not only romantically – she wouldn't probably even trust him to buy her a coffee, if it could somehow affect her relationship with Jesse.
"Have you completely lost your mind?" she hissed, looking around to make sure no one was coming.
"Come on, Rachel, drop the proud bullshit," Finn mocked her and she really wanted to punch him in the stomach. "We need you more then they would ever need you. They would replace you if someone better appeared in the picture. Just come back to McKinley and let's stop this stupid charade."
"Finn, stop it," she gritted through teeth. "Kurt's dad is fighting for his life, your mother is devastated and you come here to pick up a stupid and pointless fight about glee club? Look at yourself, look at Kurt, and think what he would think of you right now."
Still mad, she marched past him and entered the hospital room, where she was greeted by three pairs of eyes. Rachel swallowed, pale, when she realised that they must've heard the whole discussion with Finn. She opened her mouth to apologise when Finn appeared behind her, his cheeks still red from the emotions. Kurt narrowed his eyes as soon as he spotted his former teammate and soon-to-be-stepbrother. Blaine, who was keeping his head on Kurt's shoulder, raised it when his boyfriend abruptly stood up from his seat.
"Carole," he turned to Finn's mother. "I'm sorry but can I..."
"Of course, Kurt, I'll leave you with your dad," the woman nodded her head. She kissed Kurt's cheek, patted Blaine's arm and smiled at Rachel before looking at her son. "Finn, we should get going. It's late and I still have to go to work tomorrow."
"But..."
"Leave me alone with my dad, Finn," Kurt hissed, losing his patience. "All of you."
Rachel hesitated, she wanted to apologise but she honestly didn't know how. Kurt was hurting so much and she was hurting for him. Deciding that it was for the best, she slipped out of the room quietly. Carole and Finn joined her soon after and only Blaine was allowed to stay with Kurt. Finn was glaring at her from the other end of the room where Carole was scolding him in angry murmurs.
Rachel took a long look at Finn's mom. She was a strong woman, having lost one husband, she was now faced with the thought of losing another man she loved and taking care of two sons this time. Rachel admired how she seemed not to lose her strength and hope after all these years, while remaining a wonderful and warm mother, partner and person in general. It made her feel even more sorry for her because of the display of insensitivity by Finn.
"Rachel?"
She turned to look at Kurt who emerged into the corridor. He gave her a sad smile before hugging her tightly.
"Go home, Rachel," he whispered. "Blaine will drive you back. I will call you tomorrow."
"Of course," she murmured, kissing his cheek. "I'm really sorry for earlier. I..."
"You did nothing wrong, Finn needs to pull himself together," Kurt calmed her down. Blaine's popped out of the room as well, with his coat over his shoulder. Kurt wordlessly returned to his dad's side, leaving the two of them alone.
"I'll take you home," Blaine helped her put the coat on. "Let's go."
Rachel half-heartedly hoped to see Jesse's Range Rover in front of her home in Lima but it wasn't there. Blaine stopped his car and said his goodbyes, hasty to get back to Kurt. Not wanting to keep him any longer, Rachel quickly jumped out of the car and watched him leave.
"Dad? Daddy?" she called quietly into the house, closing the door behind her. It was late, but she could tell from the muffled sounds in the kitchen that her dads were there. Hearing her voice, they came into the living room and greeted her with hugs and kisses.
Rachel hugged each of them tightly; she had missed them so much even despite constant contact and weekly visits. They sat by the kitchen table, as usual. Hiram looked over at the clock on the wall and said:
"We thought you were going to come home a bit later," he put a cup of hot tea for her on the table. "Jesse said you wanted to stay longer with your friends."
"Yes, we didn't want to call you not to disturb you," Leroy added with concern. "Nothing bad happened I hope?"
Rachel shook her head. She didn't want to go into the mess with Finn that night, so she just explained that Kurt wanted to be left alone with his dad and Blaine, who went back to the hospital as soon as he dropped her off.
"You've just missed Jesse," Leroy spoke up. "He stayed for a little catching up so he can't be that far away from Lima."
"You can call him to come back here and pick you up," Hiram suggested.
"Or we can drive you back to Akron tomorrow," Leroy's voice was more than hopeful. "But I suppose you want to spend as much time with Jesse as you can so maybe I'll just call him and..."
Rachel just smiled and stopped her daddy from dialing Jesse's number.
"No, of course I'll stay," she declared.
Hiram hugged Leroy's shoulders and planted a kiss on his husband's cheek. Leroy responded with a roll of his eyes and Rachel grinned at the adorable scene in front of her. She wanted to be just like her dads in the future, with Jesse. She wanted just that and she swore to herself to be like this when the time comes.
"See," Hiram nudged Leroy's side. "I told you she's still our little girl, no matter where she lives."
Rachel chuckled and jumped to her feet to hug her beloved dads, she kissed each of their cheeks, shaking her head and concluding:
"I will always be your little girl."
Just one question: do you feel that this story is getting boring? If you do, let me know! I'll make some improvements in that case, for sure :)
-s.