When Honey was seven years old, her mother died.
It took being in a relationship with her for several years before Dwight ever heard the true story behind that phrase, but eventually Honey explained why she stopped going by her first name. You see, her mother - also named Sherry - wasn't actually her mother at all. She was her aunt. Her birth mother, Louise, died after being accidentally shot during a home invasion. It was Sherry's boyfriend at the time that pulled the trigger. Honey was only seven years old.
Sherry adopted her niece out of guilt but kept the truth about how the girl's mother passed away until she turned eighteen. Just before that, Sherry the second had met Dwight. The next time she saw him, she requested he call her Honey. It was the nickname her father had given her before he disappeared, and it was the only good memory she had from her childhood.
Occasionally, Dwight thought about what Honey's life would've been like with Louise to raise her. Honey was so hesitant when it came to trusting people, even before the turn, but he had no problem understanding why. It made perfect sense. The only thing that didn't was what had convinced her to trust him. Why, out of all the lousy men in D.C., had she chosen to be with him? Dwight was forever grateful to have met her, despite the horrible conditions their marriage now suffered through, and not once did he ever want to take it back. Even now.
Seeing the girl makes him wonder though. It makes him wonder about choices. The girl is different now - being taken under Negan's wing has made her stronger. He's seen the change in her eyes whenever he's granted the slight glimpse into her room when Negan enters and exits through the door. Negan has made Dwight her official guard, which requires standing watch outside her door twenty-four hours a day. On the rare occasion he's pulled away for another job, there's an ache in the pit of his stomach at leaving her behind. Negan's reasoning behind stationing Dwight so close to the girl was merely an act of claiming possession. He wanted to preserve what was left of the new gift he'd been given and remove any chance of someone taking it away. It was clear to Negan, based on previous actions, that Dwight had no interest in being that thief. He had done nothing but shown mercy to the girl. A girl that has yet to even tell him her name.
Certainly relieving the abuse she'd faced from Negan's men was beneficial to her in some way, whether it be small or not. Dwight chooses to believe it was the right thing to do. Even if it wasn't… well. He doesn't quite think he could bear that.
He's been instructed to escort her to the dining hall for dinner. This is new for both of them, because the last time they were this close was in her old cell. The inch of space between their arms as they walk feels magnetized, but Dwight can't tell if it's pulling him towards her or forcing him away.
It's the first time she'll be joining the other residents of the sanctuary, and despite feeling the urge to shelter her, he hopes the interactions will be good. Honey is more aware of the girl now. She may have been initially against his decision to get involved, but she seems to have softened a bit to the idea. With eyes closed and aggravated air held deep in her lungs, she reluctantly agreed to watch out for her, before Dwight even had to ask.
It's moments like that when Dwight knows he could never regret having Honey in his life.
The girl keeps watching him from the corner of her eye. He knows she's noticed the scars - it's the first thing anyone sees now, whether he likes it or not - and he wants her to just come out and say something. Speak, for once. Say more than the one word she uttered on the grimy floor of that cell.
"Is that because of me?" she asks.
The sound of her voice actually takes him by surprise. He'd been waiting to hear it for so long, and it doesn't resemble the meek whisper he remembered. Now her timber is strong. Light and airy. But firm.
He's afraid his words will upset her, and he doesn't want to lay an unnecessary layer of guilt on top of her pain, so he merely nods once.
She blinks, and says, "I'm sorry."
"Don't be." The words come out without his permission, but he can't reel them back. Realizing he should probably just keep going, he asks the question that's been filling his mind for days. "You're okay, right? Better than before."
Her reaction isn't clear. She shivers - twitches, more like it - and drops her head suddenly to watch their feet. After several seconds of deliberation, she divulges an answer, but he knows it's not the truth.
"Yes," she says, swallowing hard. "Thank you."
Dwight discovers the girl's name is Beth, but only because Honey took the liberty of asking her directly. It wasn't important, but now that he knows, it feels like something he needed. Something that now makes it easier to look her in the eye and feel good about his decision to remove her from her cell of misery and pain.
Honey doesn't use her name. She still refers to her as "the girl", and it makes Dwight's muscles in his jaw tense and twitch at the sharpness in her tone. Not that Honey isn't playing along. She's done well by Beth, becoming her personal guide to adjusting to life in the Sanctuary. Dwight has heard the rumors from the other girls. Beth is the pretty one - the shiny new toy that Negan will be eager to play with for as long as he sees fit. It would seem to be a relief for the other girls, having Negan's advances directed towards someone else for a change, but the rules are different here. Everything about life at the Sanctuary is skewed. Less attention to one of Negan's wives means less reward for that woman's previous partner. Instead of earning free meals or gaining highly sought after amenities, their husbands - now ex-husbands - will be forced to work for points. The possibility has even crossed Dwight's mind when it comes to the deal he and Honey made upon arriving back at Negan's doorstep. But Honey has always been a favorite of the man in charge, and despite a few small acts of treason, Dwight has become one of Negan's most loyal companions. Mostly without choice, but it's come with its benefits.
He's one of the few that have working televisions in their rooms. And if Dwight sees something he wants, no one has the authority to question his right to take it. He's used this to his full advantage with most trivial things, but it helps fill the void when it comes to the things he can't control. Like the desperate need to break Negan's teeth whenever the man spends just a little too long kissing the woman he loves in front of him. He still loves Honey, despite it all.
Dwight reminds himself of that as he stands outside of Beth's door - something that feels more like a personal responsibility now than a command from Negan. He's no longer on watch duty now that Negan has taken the liberty of installing a padlock over the handle, but he's still her personal escort, and tonight, as he walked her bath to her room after supper, she told him something he didn't want to hear.
So he's yet to move. He stands there gripping the crossbow she mentioned with white-knuckled fingers. She knows Daryl - that man he and Honey ran across in the woods before Tina died. Before everything went to shit and they made the decision to go back. They'd decided it was too risky to trust him, so they'd stolen his bike and his bow. Dwight never thought they'd cross paths again, but here he is - the man's name spoken from the lips of a girl he now gives a shit about. And he doesn't know why.
He decides to do something. He decides that while severing the path between Daryl and Beth might be selfish, it's the better option. Dwight wants to keep her safe. He wants to hold on to the small routine they have, walking the halls of the Sanctuary together. If Beth knew Daryl was out there - if he was alive nearby - she'd take whatever opportunity she could to get to him, and that made Dwight's stomach churn. So, Dwight was going to find him. And he was going to kill him.
Because Dwight couldn't stand the thought of someone else standing where he stood.
Even if it was just outside her door.