Chapter 8: Let Me Be Your Star

Jesse's POV

Jesse yawned. He tossed his jacket to his right, letting it fall onto the chair that he passed on his way to the kitchen in his New York apartment. After a moment of hesitation, he grabbed a coffee pot and put it into the coffee machine before he pulled out his cell and dialled Rachel's number. It was almost eight o'clock but since Rachel and he talked yesterday over the phone until three a.m., he wasn't sure if she was awake already. He decided to at least leave a message to let her know the flight was fine.

Not surprisingly, she didn't answer so he grunted but smiled slightly when the recording of her soft voice filled his ear.

"Hey, babe, it's me," he spoke up. "I'm just calling to say hi and that my flight was fine – and that despite your horrifying predictions, I didn't miss it because I overslept so your conscience is clean. I'm in my apartment already, which wasn't robbed in any way, as well, despite your worries."

Jesse entered his en suit bathroom and started the shower, adjusting the temperature of the water so that it had a subtle coolness to it. Chilly water has always helped him wake up easier. Jesse then put the phone into his other hand and pressed it to his ear again:

"I guess you'll be with Kurt again so you just call me back in the evening or something."

Jesse took off his T-shirt and dropped it to his feet. The corner of his lips lifted when he noticed a small dark spot near his collarbone – a little territorial mark that Rach has left him during the weekend. His thoughts wandered back to his bedroom where he was ready to return the favour before his father interrupted them and he internally cursed at Nat for pulling him away from Rach's closeness prematurely. Especially, after the glares he received from her moronic ex-boyfriend – the last thing Jesse wanted to do was leaving Rachel with that giant oaf alone.

She told him about Hudson's unexpected outburst that resulted in her, Finn and Finn's mother being thrown out from the hospital by Kurt. Jesse's mood worsened even more when he heard about his suggestions that Rachel returned to McKinley and rejoined her old club. He knew that Rach was smarter than that but he also knew that there was the tiniest part to his girlfriend that still felt guilty about betraying the New Directions for Jesse at Regionals. He dreaded to even think about letting his girlfriend anywhere those people and the toxic environment they'd created last year. Jesse observed Rachel ever since she had left Lima and was so happy to see her grow more and more confident. Over his dead body will Jesse let Rachel succumb to their humiliation and disdain ever again. She was genuinely blooming in Carmel, had a bunch of amazing friends in and out of the team who would do anything to help her. Sure, there will always be some individuals in Vocal Adrenaline that will want to push Rachel aside but she was stronger than that now.

Jesse let out a small chuckle when he remembered her story of how she confronted Casey Cransen in the parking lot. Jesse didn't recognise the girl as his old neighbour until Rachel didn't remind him about it. Not that it helped Jesse to dig out from his memory anything more than just her name and that unfortunate jealousy-driven incident which Rachel had caused back then – and which made her the target of Casey's hate.

With Invitationals, Casey's possible "evil revenge plan" (as Rach has dubbed it) and now Hudson's behaviour, Jesse thought that she deserved some peace and quiet. And on his way to New York, he had come up with the greatest idea.

"And I was thinking that maybe I could talk to Hiram and Leroy about letting you come to New York, straight after Invitationals?" Jesse suggested imagining Rachel's thousand watt smile upon hearing his idea – she was hinting at it several times. He had been too busy before but with a bit of work, he could do it now. "I'll try to sort out my schedule so that we are not disturbed by any unexpected meetings, calls or emergencies?"

Glancing at the watch on his wrist, Jesse cursed internally when he noticed that it was late.

"And I really need to go if I don't want to be late... I miss you," he quickly wrapped the message up. "More than you can even imagine and, yes, more than you miss me. No more arguments about that... Think about the trip to NY. I love you."

And on that chaotic last note, Jesse pressed red button on his cell. He had half an hour to take a shower, get some food and drink the coffee, before he was supposed to leave his apartment so that he wasn't late for the meeting with Nat, while trying to keep his eyes open. Maybe, just maybe, staying up with Rachel until the middle of the night was not such a good idea after all.

The small coffee shop where Jesse was supposed to meet Nat and his friend was crowded with people, as usually at this hour of the day. Jesse arrived a few minutes early, ordered himself espresso, and was almost surprised to see his mentor already there.

Nathaniel, or Nat as he hated his full name, was a senior in the same department as Jesse. Even though his parents came form England and that was where he has spent the first years of his life, he described himself as a done New Yorker. Jesse was first reluctant to work with him as Nat didn't strike him as the most reliable mentor but the joke was on him, apparently. As soon as the second day since he'd found Jesse, Nat made sure that Jesse met the right people and knew the right places. He guided him over the most important information, gossips and guidelines concerning their department, teachers and other students assuring that Jesse knew who to talk to and who to avoid. Then, Nat disappeared for a few days, only to return to New York suddenly while Jesse was in Akron with the news about meeting one of his and his boyfriend's friends who was the newest discovery of the off-Broadway stages.

Nat was sitting alone, sipping on his red tea and reading some book, when Jesse dropped his bag to the floor and collapsed on the chair next to him.

"Good morning, to you, too," Nat grinned at Jesse who just yawned in response. "How was your flight?"

Jesse rolled his eyes. Nat took another slow sip of his tea. Jesse wanted to grab his coffee but didn't manage to actually drink anything before Nat snatched the cup out of his hands. He ignored Jesse's glare and – much to Jesse's frustration – asked some randomly passing girl to toss his coffee into the trash. Jesse scowled and opened his mouth to tell Nat off but his mentor just ignored him, instead giving him the cup that was standing next to him earlier.

"Drink up," Nat ordered Jesse curtly, grimacing. "It's better than this poor excuse of a coffee."

"What is this?" Jesse asked with suspicion.

He lifted the lid to see something that looked like a copy of whatever Nat was drinking at the moment. Shrugging, Jesse took a sip and immediately felt like vomiting. He coughed several times, noticing that Nat was smiling at his mentee with a cocked eyebrow.

"What the hell is this?" he grimaced. He coughed one more time, trying to get rid of the foul taste from his mouth. Just what was wrong with his beloved black espresso?

"A tea," Nat replied nonchalantly. Jesse threw his the 'stop the BS' look so he sighed dramatically. "Family secret. Drink up, we need you to be conscious when talking to Andrew."

Shaking his head and knowing that arguing was futile, Jesse emptied the cup in three big gulps. He just hoped that whatever was in the beverage was legal – or at least not dangerous. Once he was finished, though, Jesse could almost immediately feel the difference; his eyelids got lighter, his body less logy and his mind clearer. Nat just smirked with superior expression.

"Thanks," Jesse murmured. It was more effective than his coffee, obviously. "And to answer your question: make me fly standby again and I will send you to Ohio and make you stay there with my mother and her friends for a week."

Nat's expression turned into a picture of disgust at the mere thought of going to the small, poor, conservative state such as Ohio.

"Why are we sending our sweet Nathaniel to Ohio?" asked an amused voice over their heads.

Jesse looked up to see a blonde guy, dressed casually in a button up shirt and jeans, slipping into the last vacant chair. Andrew. The guy was holding a cup of steaming hot coffee in his hands and drank a little. Jesse opened his mouth to introduce himself but the newcomer just looked at Jesse and smirked and added as an afterthought:

"I volunteer to pay for the tickets, by the way. Just to see that."

Jesse laughed shortly.

"My dear mentee here is just mad because I've destroyed his great plan involving having sex that was not with himself," Nat threw mockingly but Jesse knew him well enough to see that he was just messing with him.

Andrew just raised his eyebrow at the odd banter that occurred in front of him but didn't interrupt.

"And you still owe me for that," Jesse threw in the same jocular tone.

Nat's phone started ringing and their attention focused on Jesse's mentor. He sighed with exaggeration and rejected the call almost immediately.

"It's Jackson," he explained with a roll of his eyes and proceeded to look at his fingernails. Jesse remembered that Jackson was the name of his current boyfriend. "He was supposed to meet with us today."

Jesse frowned. He was about to ask why he rejected the call then, but Nat beat him to it and explained:

"I'm breaking up with him," he shrugged nonchalantly. "I mean, I have broken up with him already, but I don't think he's listened to the voice mail yet... Or maybe he has," he added as an afterthought, but without much more interest.

Andrew choked on the coffee he's brought in with him but Jesse just watched the scene with amusement – it wasn't the first time he's heard Nat have this conversation with his friends. He changed guys like gloves and he's been on his current (ex)boyfriend, Jackson's, case for a few days now.

Jesse could understand that behaviour up to some point – it was almost as if he saw himself from before Rach. Jesse had never been a good boy; he used to get rid of an importunate girl as soon as it was possible when he got bored. In his humble opinion, an easy way out was the best kind of a way out. He was young, ready to escape Ohio without anything or anyone (apart from his best friend, of course, only until she would join him in college) holding him back before he could spread his wings in New York. He had conveniently assumed it was the most successful route for him.

Until he couldn't just stop wanting to kiss the hell out of the said best friend and stay with her for the rest of his life.

Briefly, Jesse wondered how long would it take for Nat to find himself his own 'Rach'.

"Jeez, Nathaniel," Andrew shook his head disapprovingly. "He's my cousin, for Christ's sake, you can't break up with him over the phone! Again!"

This time Jesse was the one to open his mouth in slight surprise. That piece of information never turned up until now. Nat ignored his friend once more and turned to look at Jesse.

"We're not here to discuss me or my social life," he cut short Andrew's another attempt at scolding him. Then he gestured from one guy to the other and conducted quick introductions. "Andrew, Jesse. Jesse, Andrew. I'm going to hit the boy's room and you two try to like each other enough for me to come back to a cheerful conversation about musical theatre. Am I understood?"

And he was gone. He and Andrew sat there for a few seconds, both watching him go before Jesse finally moved. He reached out his hand for Andrew to shake it.

"Jesse St. James," he introduced himself properly this time.

"Andy West," Andrew replied, taking his hand. He looked around and apparently decided to break the odd atmosphere. "So, Nathaniel says you want to be on Broadway."

"Yeah," Jesse chuckled at the simplicity of that statement.

"Good. I happen to know a few useful things about that place," Andrew joked.

From that point on, the conversation flew quickly. Andrew asked Jesse few basic questions which Jesse answered briefly: his interests, experience in performing, any workshops he's took part in. He was mildly impressed by Jesse's long-standing leading position in the best show choir in the country and the streak of victories that happened thanks to him. In turn, Andrew gave him precise answers and entertained with useful pieces of advice or anecdotes.

Halfway through the meeting, Jesse believed that even the standby flight was worth making it earlier to the city for this. Not leaving Rachel but close.

"I've read about your show," Jesse spoke up after some time of listening to another story. "It was a smash. I imagine the competition for the role was huge."

Andrew was silent for a moment and just watched Jesse, as if trying to evaluate him for some reason.

"I started off as a member of the ensemble in Wicked," Andrew shrugged and Jesse arched his eyebrow at that; being even the smallest part of such a powerhouse like Wicked must've been... well, wicked. "I got lucky because my friend had a friend whose brother knew the guy... You know the drill. I've spent several months watching the main cast, learning and networking even though hardly anyone could remember our names apart from the number we were given in auditions."

Jesse nodded his head with understanding. Even though he knew that getting any significant role was hardly possible for a rookie, the perspective of struggling and beginning at the very bottom of the food chain was hard to imagine for Jesse, the former star of the show choir world and a four-time consecutive National Champion.

But still, he had long four years ahead of him to prepare for what was coming in the future.

"Well," Andrew continued. "That was at the beginning. When I was ready to move on, I found out about the audition for another small role and used the fact that the director was previously briefly involved in the production of Wicked. I landed another job and got to be the understudy for the second lead. One night, the guy got sick and it so happened that there was another friend of a friend that has been looking for people to cast in new original off-Broadway play. I got it, in the end. Summing up," Andrew shrugged. "You can be the bet damned thing out there and spend the rest of your life in the ensemble if you aren't as lucky as you are talented."

Jesse fell silent after that.

"If you're good, though," Andrew spoke up suddenly. "I could be your luck someday."

At that, Jesse's back straightened immediately in surprise. Andrew noticed this and smirked, making Jesse frown at bit.

"Are you good?" Andrew asked half-heartedly.

"The best," Jesse St. James' infamous cockiness took over.

"I'll let Nat know if I hear about an interesting call," Andrew promised, nodding his head.

The moment Nat's name was mentioned the two of them suddenly realised that Jesse's mentor still hasn't returned to their table. They exchanged quick looks.

"Should we go look for him?" Jesse asked uncertainly.

"Nah," the man shook his head. "He's probably on the phone with Jackson."

"That's how you two know each other?" Jesse asked with genuine interest. "Because he's dating your cousin?"

Somehow, he couldn't imagine the easy-going Nat meeting the collected Andrew on some random get-together and becoming friends if it weren't for someone else's action or connection to someone.

But his theory crumbled under the chuckle that Andrew gave out hearing Jesse's question.

"I wish," it was Nat's voice again.

Jesse looked with a frown how his mentor returned to his seat without any sort of explanation and threw his phone on the table. He acted as if he was really gone only for a minute and nothing remotely emotional or suspicious did not happen while he was away. Andrew opened his mouth, probably to ask the question but Nat bluntly covered his mouth, silencing him instantly.

"That mule over here," Nat turned to Jesse, pointing his thumb at Andrew. "Is be your 'mentoring' grandpa, J."

"What?" Jesse asked disbelievingly. Nat not Jackson never mentioned anything about it in the past. "You were mentoring Nat in Julliard?"

"Yeah, briefly."

Jesse was surprised to hear that Andrew was Nat's first mentor but he was even more floored when he heard the rest of their banter.

"Yeah," Nat mocked him out of the sudden. "Until you freaking flunked out, leaving me with that lunatic, Madison McKenzie. C'mon, just because I'm gay and fabulous didn't mean that I needed to be her make over machine once a month."

"I didn't flunk out. I left."

"Right, just after the dean kicked your pretty ass out of his office saying that you are done."

Andrew didn't have a degree and still managed to make it in the business. Jesse kept his thoughts to himself, choosing to just lean back and observe the two friends from the distance.

He's learned some time ago that when Nat was irritated at something or someone, it was better to stay out of his way, listen to his rambling and nod in the appropriate moments. Andrew must've known about it as well, but it apparently didn't stop him from speaking back to his old mentee and riling him up for the pure sheer sense of enjoyment, apparently.

His phone buzzed against his leg and Jesse pulled the device out, almost expecting to see Rachel's name on the screen but it was Tom, the same guy who Jesse practiced the drama assignment the week before.

Are you free? I need a favour, the text from Tom said.

Jesse looked up in an attempt to get his company's attention but the two of them were still deep in the silly repartee. It took Jesse almost a minute before they stopped talking.

"Sorry to interrupt but I need to go," Jesse stood up and nodded his head in Andrew's direction. "Thanks for meeting me today."

Andrew stood up as well and shook Jesse's hand, all collected and professional as if the childish bickering with Nat didn't just take place. Nat, on the other hand, grinned at him and waved his hand, reminding him about their tomorrow's "lunch date" (Nat's words, not Jesse's) with some of the upper-classmen. Jesse could swear that most of the people he met during the last month were almost exclusively people that Nat acquainted him with.

Stepping outside into the empty space of Columbus Avenue, Jesse remembered that he had one last thing to take care of before he could finally get some well-deserved relaxation in his apartment. Deciding that the weather was good enough for a walk, he started walking down the street. With a sigh he pulled out his cell and dialled his sister's number, hoping for a chance for a decent conversation with Rebecca.

Since the call that Rachel answered, Becks was a no-show. She hasn't called, she stopped texting him maniacally and, for some reason, Jesse wasn't enjoying the sudden change. His long experiences with his sister taught him that when she became too silent, she was up to something.

"Jesse?" Rebecca's surprised voice filled the speaker.

"Hi, you have a moment?"

He could hear some indistinct voices, shouts and other sounds in the background. Becks told him to wait for a minute and he could hear that she must've moved to some more peaceful room.

"Okay, it's fine now," she declared after few seconds. "Make it quick, I don't have much time."

Ignoring the harsh greetings, Jesse cleared his throat.

"I didn't tell dad anything, Becks," he threw out of himself. She didn't react in any way so Jesse continued. "But I think I can talk him into granting you the trust fund again."

He never managed to finish his conversation with his father before he was forced to cut his visit short, but Jesse was certain that with a bit of skilful persuasion, that would involve a play on his mother's lack of awareness, he would be able to change his father's decision. Maybe that would be enough to stop his sister from this madness.

"Jesse," Becks' voice sounded softer now, resigned even. "I don't need your help. I need you to keep quiet about this."

"What?" he barked disbelievingly. "You've got to be kidding me, Becks."

Jesse ran his hands through his hair and huffed in irritation; she was not seriously telling him that she'd rather went through with this fake wedding rather than accepting his help. Apparently, she was as she groaned.

"If I wanted pity, I would've just gone home myself," she hissed. "I can take care of myself."

"Oh really?" Jesse mocked her. "But you're forgetting that your way of taking care of yourself extends onto other people as well, Becca."

"Oh so now it's about you?" she replied sarcastically as well. "Oh, spare me the bullshit..."

"You know what?" it was Jesse's turn to explode. "You're full of bullshit."

She just irked every nerve in his body lately and somehow all his brakes disappeared.

"You turn your back on me, on mom and dad, on everybody – just to feel good about yourself. Dad's an asshole, too, for cutting you off but you are just too proud to accept help when it's willingly provided. And you know what? You can push it all you want but we both know that it's never been about assuring you a comfortable life, but staging the ultimate 'kiss my ass' show. Well done."

Jesse stopped to collect himself but the distinct snort on the other end of the line triggered him once more. He kicked some random empty can and let out a dry chuckle, continuing his rant mockingly:

"Oh, poor, little Becca, with her awful, horrible, parents who wanted her to achieve something in life, with the designer clothes and exotic vacations, and with so much freedom that it's unhealthy. Face it, Becks: instead of trying to seek compromise, you willingly decided to throw it all away on a fling!"

What was wrong with his sister? She was acting up without any viable reason other than the poor excuse about their father and money; Jesse really believed that Becca was less materialistic but it turned out that he was wrong.

"You really think that about me?" Becca's voice cut the silence. "I told you, I don't need your help with our parents. I never needed. What I wanted from you, though, when I told you about everything, was understanding. Nothing more. Just my little brother telling me that he would support me, even if he didn't agree with my choices. Instead, you just decided to judge me and lashed out at me without hesitation."

He was glad that he's taken the longer walking route to his apartment because he now could work some of the emotions off on his way home. By the time she was finished, the anger was partially gone from Jesse's system and he listened to his sister's broken voice while biting his lip. He didn't agree with her words but didn't interrupt her either, just waiting for her to finish.

"Becks," he murmured when he was sure she was done. "Me supporting you means me helping you in any way I can. But if you can't accept this, then I think we're done here. Because, honestly, I've spent the last couple of days, either in New York going to classes, or in Akron with my girlfriend, while in the back of my head, I was trying to deal with your situation – something that you clearly don't give a fuck about. I'm tired. Good luck."

He hung up and almost immediately dialled another number. He waited for a few seconds until a female voice answered.

"Mom, we need to talk."

On Monday afternoon, Jesse walked into the studio to begin his last class that day. With his eyes glued to the screen of his phone, he took his usual place in the back row and continued to type back his lengthy reply. He and Rachel were in the middle of a heated discussion about the newest trend of reviving old Broadway productions instead of creating fresh, original works. Rachel was a strong supporter of this idea, claiming that it gives some young actor (meaning Rach) a chance and a strong opportunity to realise their (her) dream of playing their (her) favourite parts in the future (which in Rachel's case would be Fanny, Evita and Laurey). While Jesse was the last person to deny Rach her dreams, he would be more satisfied with having originated some character and watching it become iconic.

As he suspected, she had spend the entire Sunday in the hospital with Kurt and Blaine so the first form of contact they had were sporadic texts since this morning. She was thrilled about his proposition of coming over to New York next week – and Jesse was really hoping for Shelby to agree.

After he called his mother, the hell broke loose. Jesse tried to keep as much distance as he could after explaining the details to his parents and telling that he wanted to be left out from this for as long as possible. Having stirred the schism of his family, he dreamed of having his other family as close as possible.

Unfortunately, Shelby was less enthusiastic about his idea. His old director didn't give Rachel a straightforward answer when she asked and they both knew what that meant: the next time he would see Rach would most probably be on Thanksgiving unless they would find some free time that would agree with both of their busy schedules.

But that problem belonged to the abstract future. For now, not losing their good mood, however, they indulged themselves in their half-hearted discussion that Rachel was struggling to win.

Don't even try to argue, Jesse. She wrote back almost immediately. You would die if they casted you as Phantom, or even Danny.

Of course. But it doesn't mean that I wouldn't rather try to use my extraordinary talents to create a character from the scratches so that I would be forever remembered as the first to play it, not another revival casting match.

Phantom, Jesse. Phantom!

Jesse chuckled, making several people around look at him apprehensively. They weren't used to hearing him laughter since, while not being rude or a total loner, Jesse preferred keeping to himself and talking only during classes or when addressed by someone else.

Looking over at the clock, Jesse realised that the workshop was about to begin. Even though it was almost October, it was the first class in this semester since the teacher has been forced to prolong his stay in Europe until now.

Jesse has heard a lot of stuff about that man, both good and bad. According to Nat and some other people, he was the second most important person in his department and making him irritated was something Jesse, and anyone really, would regret instantly. If you were good and hard-working, however, the same man would make sure that your career soars as soon as you were out of school.

Baby, I need to go. I will call you after VA rehearsal. Jesse wrote.

You better! I was winning this argument. I love you.

I love you more. Jesse typed back and, lifting the corner of his mouth, added: And I was so winning this.

"Good afternoon, class. My name if Richard Harrison, and I'll be your Voice instructor for this semester. Having said this, let's get down to business."

Jesse's head snapped in the direction of the owner of the new voice. The man, fifty-something short and dark-haired, walked up to the centre of the studio and threw them all a long, evaluating look. Jesse frowned but remained glued to his spot like the rest of his class, ignoring the prolonged silence. The professor's eyes moved over every single face – and with each face, Harrison nodded his head before moving his eyes onto another person. People around Jesse were raising their heads, or letting a small relieved breath when they realised they were off the radar.

Jesse cocked his eyebrow at these reactions and frowned, until the eyes of the professor stopped on him and stayed there for longer than the usual three seconds. Not knowing what was going on, Jesse moved in his seat but remained silent, ignoring the curious looks that others started throwing in his directions.

The man wasn't going to throw his out for texting with Rachel before class, wasn't he? Jesse thought, still having no idea what caused the slightest frown visible on professor Harrison's face.

"Can you stand up?" the professor asked finally. Jesse obeyed without a comment. "What's your name?"

"St. James, sir," he stated immediately. Maybe it was a good thing actually, he managed to get the professor's attention in one way or another, at least. "Jesse St. James."

"I don't remember you."

Jesse blinked. In the corner of his eye, he saw that a guy next to him smirked and in front of him, some girl threw him an apologetic look. The rest, however, was still wearing as confused expressions as Jesse.

"Excuse me?" he asked.

"I've personally auditioned every person in this room," Richard Harrison explained simply. "For some reason, I don't recall your audition, Mr St. James."

His words caused another wave of frowns, exchanged glances and smirks. But mostly, the people around him were exchanging looks with curiosity written all over their faces. Jesse considered the teacher's words for a few seconds, trying to ignore the stared. He never thought it was important to share with anyone the special circumstances of his late admission to Julliard. Judging from the confusion he caused, it seemed like it might become a slight setback, though. He hoped it was not the case; the last this he needed right now was college problems to add to Becks.

"Due to my mother's illness, I wasn't able to make it to the auditions," Jesse tried to keep his voice neutral but strong. "The admission board agreed to reconsider my application based on my Show Choir National Championship performance."

"When was that?"

"Early May."

Harrison considered his answer in silence for few seconds.

"I've been in London by then," he nodded his head, saying the words more to himself than to them.

He fell silent for another couple of seconds during which Jesse started feeling really uncomfortable. He swallowed, trying not to show that the calculating glare was making him actually nervous.

"It's not that I don't trust my colleagues' decisions," Harrison finally spoke out and the doubtful tone of his voice told Jesse that whatever was going to follow wouldn't be very nice.

He was not disappointed:

"It's more about the fact that I would never even consider letting them pick me a Christmas card, not to mention letting them decide about a student that I did not personally approve of. Step out."

Even though no one dared to open their mouths, the silence that fell over the studio was telling in itself. Jesse didn't hesitate, though. He's been accepted by people who knew what they were doing. No matter how important Harrison was, he couldn't just kick him out if he could sing.

And Jesse St. James could sing.

Jesse stopped next to the older man, facing the small audience made up of his classmates. Some were looking bored, some sympathetic and one of the girls even dared to give him a smile.

"I don't have any wishes or pet peeves – as long as you sell yourself well," professor Harrison declared, moving so that he was leaning against his desk. He grabbed his notepad and a pen. "Whenever you are ready, Mr St. James."

Jesse didn't have to wait long. He took a deep breath and opened his mouth to sing the first tones of the song. He's heard it some time ago and it was always reminding him of Rachel. And given everything that Rachel has done to assure him that last chance audition, if there was a song that would be perfect for a moment like this – it was this one.

Fade in on a girl with a hunger for fame.

And a face and a name to remember.

Jesse closed his eyes and smiled, giving in to the music in his head.

Her smile and your fantasies play a duet

That will make you forget where you are.

The music starts playing, it's the beat of my heart saying:

Let me be your star.

It wasn't a song that Jesse would pick up usually but he couldn't stop himself from taking the "Rachel route" for once: putting as much emotion into his music as he could. He watched his Rach all summer, how she took every chance to amaze people with her singing and dancing, just because she loved doing that, not because she was told to. Though Rach would never admit it out loud, it was her own personal rehab from Shelby's rigorous rehearsal schedules and perfectionist-like precision that she required from her performers.

His voice grew stronger as he opened his eyes for the first time. He took in his class' faces, moving his eyes from one person to another.

Flashback to a girl with a song in her heart,

And she's waiting to start the adventure.

The fire and drive that make dreams come alive,

They fill her soul, she's in control.

The drama, the laughter, the tears just like pearls –

Well, they're all in this girl's repertoire.

It's all for the taking, and the magic we'll be making;

Let me be your star.

Jesse used this time to observe Rachel's undisputed talent in the open and how she thrived in people's admiration that didn't necessarily came from her voice but the way she performed. That was something magical to watch.

He wasn't surprised to hear and see the applause. He let out a breath while professor Harrison nodded his head but didn't join in on the general cheering. Jesse was confident, he did well.

"You're free for today," the man addressed the class. "For the reminder of the semester, we'll be meeting individually. I'll post the list with names by tomorrow morning. If there are any problems with your availability on the assigned dates, I don't care."

Jesse returned to his seat to grab his bag when he heard a voice calling his name.

"Mr. St. James, a minute, please."

Professor Harrison handed Jesse a page filled with a deliberate notes on his song. One fleeting glance at the list assured Jesse that the man was either unhealthily meticulous or simply mean for having been faced with someone else making the decision for him.

"I'm listening," Harrison sat on the edge of his desk, encouraging Jesse to speak, seeing the slightest grimace that must've appeared on his face.

Jesse cocked his eyebrow.

"I deserve to be here," he said, trying to contain the undertone of irritation. "I would've passed your normal audition."

The man didn't say anything just nodded his head but not in agreement – it was neither a 'yes' nor 'no' and Jesse couldn't get through the man's impassive expression. Recognising his cue, though, Jesse turned to leave the studio but stopped in the doorway and turned again. Harrison looked up questioningly.

"Yes?"

Jesse threw the last glance at the list with the man's assessment in his hand.

"How much of this," he lifted the piece of paper. "Is an actual constructive criticism and not just picking on me?"

"That, Mr. St. James," Harrison started walking towards him. "Is your assignment for the week: go through the list and tell me what is and what is not true when we meet next time."

Still experiencing mixed feelings, Jesse strode the corridor towards the exit. He played the cocky card and felt like it paid off for the time being. He was at least sure that the man was not going to be on his case for the rest of the year, luckily. It was really the last thing he needed at the moment.

Until now, Jesse could truthfully say that he enjoyed every minute spent in this city, this building and with those people, even though the number of his actual acquaintances was rather limited and included Nat, few of his friends and Tom from the drama department – who was waiting for him few meters away.

Tom jumped to his feet when Jesse approached him. Shoving the list from Harrison into his bag, Jesse looked at him expectantly.

"How was your weekend with your girl, huh?" Tom asked instead of a greeting.

Jesse threw him a sideways glance. He didn't recall telling anyone apart from Nat that he was going to Ohio.

"Stalker much?" he asked, coking one eyebrow.

Tom rolled his eyes.

"We're Facebook friends," he explained with a shrug. "Your girlfriend posted some pictures of the two of you."

Oh. Jesse didn't see the said pictures but he remembered playing with Rachel's phone during the auditions and during the break. She was the one responsible for their social network life and Jesse was happy to leave it in her hands.

They caught the cab to avoid being drenched in the heavy rain that ruled over the city. When some time later Jesse was opening the door to his apartment and letting Tom first, his phone buzzed in his pocket. It was a text from Rachel:

She said no *sad face*. But I will see you on Skype tonight?

Sighing, Jesse shook his head with resignation but typed back instantly that he couldn't wait.

"Okay, I'm going to say this again," Tom looked around, pulling Jesse out of thoughts. "An apartment in Manhattan is sick."

"You live in Manhattan," Jesse reminded Tom pointedly.

"In the dorms," his friend replied instantly. "With hundreds of other people and a roommate who I'm almost sure wants to kill me in my sleep."

"Sorry, love, but we're not there yet," Jesse mocked Tom. "I think we should at least sleep with each other twice before I let you bring in your stuff."

Tom glared at Jesse but his expression changed when he frowned:

"Why twice?"

"I'm not usually letting my one-night stands move in with me," Jesse deadpanned.

He told Tom to wait for a minute while he grabbed a bottle of water for himself and Tom. Heading back to the living room, Jesse wondered how easily it was for him to joke around with a guy that he, if he was to be honest, didn't really know. Tom seemed to be a nice guy, if you looked past his slightly snobbish and arrogant personality as well as the constant know-it-all attitude. But, seriously, who Jesse was to be irritated by something that he himself was famous for?

The last time he hit it off with someone that easily (apart from Rach, obviously) was Kate and that ended in some kind of odd, bizarre friendship between them; one to end up just as abruptly as it started when she almost literally went MIA on them no longer than a week after graduation.

This time he was sure not to end up hooking up with that person, though. That would be the first – and a definite relief for his Rach. Jesse suppressed a chuckle.

"So, what'd you got for me?" Tom asked accepting the drink.

In a desperate search for distraction, Jesse called Tom about his message as soon as he was done talking with his father. Apparently, Tom was planning an anniversary dinner with his girlfriend and decided to take advantage of Jesse's immerse music collection and knowledge. What Tom wanted from him, provided Jesse with a comfortable excuse for not thinking about his sister. He agreed immediately.

Jesse produced a stack of CDs that he's prepared for Tom the day before. Each was complemented with a short description as to the possible setting in which it could be useful... For Jesse's defence, Tom didn't give him much detail and he had to work out most of it on his own. From his experience, Jesse knew it was better to be prepared for every possibility.

"I want them back by Thursday," Jesse reminded Tom. "Some of those are Rachel's and you don't want to mess with her music collection."

"Why do I have a feeling that she's somehow scarier than you?" Tom threw jokingly but Jesse didn't join him in the joke.

"Well, she is," he shrugged seriously. "So you better make sure she has her music back in an ideal state."

Rachel's POV

The VA rehearsal on Monday wasn't as gruelling as Rachel expected even thought it was almost eight o'clock when Shelby let them go. It was the first rehearsal with the new members of the team, though, so Rachel's mother decided to keep them an hour longer than usual to make sure everyone was doing fine with the number for Invitationals on Saturday.

Even though Invitationals weren't the official part of the show choir circuit, Shelby always made sure that her team was top notch. She perceived it as important when it came to establishing the forthcoming prospects for Sectionals and wanted Vocal Adrenaline to set the expectation bar as high as possible. Hence, the long and exhausting practices. They were performing only one number and she got the solo all to herself. It would be the first time she would be on the stage with Vocal Adrenaline without any other voice to steal the spotlight from her.

It was both scary and so, so exciting.

Shelby told Rachel to meet her in fifteen minutes by her car so the girl skipped the shower in the locker rooms. Her car was still at Jesse's house where Jesse left it before he went back to New York. Knowing about the tight atmosphere in Jesse's family house, Rachel decided to wait a couple of days before picking the Rover from there, not wanting to bother anyone unnecessarily. Or that was what she told herself.

Waiting outside by the car, Rachel waved her hand to several of her teammates, saying a lot of cheerful 'goodnights' and 'byes' and 'see you tomorrows' before she decided to pull out her cell to call Kurt. His dad was still in the hospital but Rachel knew for a fact that Carole didn't let Kurt spend the entire afternoon in the hospital so she was pretty sure he would be at home and free to talk. She was right.

"Hi, Rachel," he sounded even more exhausted than the day before while he answered her obvious question without prompt. "Nothing new."

Her heard cried in sympathy for Kurt.

"How are you holding up?" she asked in a small voice.

"The same. Blaine's been here earlier but had to go home. How are you?"

Rachel smiled lightly when she realised that Kurt didn't want to talk about him. Following his indirect request, she started telling him about her day and rehearsal. In meantime, Shelby emerged from the building and Rachel saw the woman pushing the alarm code on the entrance to the auditorium before she was ready to leave.

Kurt had promised earlier to come to the Invitationals but she didn't really expect him to appear now.

"Don't be ridiculous," Kurt snorted when she mentioned that he didn't need to come. "I'll be there if only to point out what I didn't like."

"I'm really glad to hear that," Rachel chuckled softly. "I need someone to motivate me to work harder."

"I can always suggest Finn to go and drag the glee club with him, if you so dramatically need someone to criticise you."

She rolled her eyes but didn't voice her fear that's been following her all week: one in which she suspected to actually spot her former teammates in the audience next weekend.

Shelby's apartment wasn't that far from the school and, since the traffic at this hour was almost non-existent, Rachel was still in the middle of telling Kurt about her and Justin's idea for the perfect set list for Nationals this year when they were back home.

She put down her duffel bag on the bed in her room when she heard Kurt gasp shortly and she frowned in silent concern until she heard his next words:

"Oh, speaking of Finn," he began with a clear annoyance in his voice. "You will not believe what he has been doing all week."

Rachel wasn't really curious about his ex-boyfriend's life but she grunted incoherently in response listening to Kurt's words, especially that he seemed to be both extremely mad and amused by whatever Finn was up to. With every word that fell from her friend's lips, Rachel couldn't stop her jaw hitting the floor when Kurt finished talking about Finn's newest (and most ridiculous so far) idea of praying to a slice of a grilled bread.

"He did what?!" she called with astonishment but not without a dose of amusement.

That boy was way out of his mind, apparently, as he believed that whatever good happened over the past week was thanks to a sandwich.

"This new Sam kid dislocated his shoulder during game and Finn went back to being the quarterback. He just assumed it was because he prayed to this... thing," she could practically tell that Kurt rolled his eyes in this moment. "Oh, and he decided that Quinn wanted to get back together with him – also because he asked a grilled cheese for it."

Rachel suppressed a sigh when she heard that. She always knew that Finn wasn't the brightest crayon in the box but that was just beyond everything else he has ever done.

"He ate it finally this morning, thankfully," Kurt added with obvious relief. "But can you even imagine? My dad ended up in a hospital and he spent his week talking to a grilled slice of bread?"

"Your dad will be fine," she assured Kurt with full conviction. "And Finn's mom seems to help a lot, right?"

"Yes," Kurt breathed out. "That woman must possess some serious superpowers. As far as I am concerned, the two of them can get married already."

Rachel laughed at the enthusiastic tone Kurt used to express his wish.

"Oh, wait, I didn't tell you the best," Kurt called out with another humourless chuckle but also with some odd tone to his voice.

She almost held her breath while Kurt took his time to keep her in anticipation. Then, after ten seconds or so, he finally threw it out of himself:

"He believes that it was thanks to him that Jesse went back to New York earlier because he asked the bread for it when he saw you two together."

Stunned, Rachel opened her mouth for the second time, this time remaining speechless until a disbelieving snort escaped her mouth. What?

"Well," Rachel found her voice finally. She collapsed on the pillows on her bed and shrugged, looking up at the ceiling. "He owes me around eighteen hours and a date with my boyfriend, then."

She heard Kurt sigh and then his next question:

"How is this whole long distance thing going for you anyway?"

Rachel sighed. It was the first time Kurt asked her about Jesse living in New York since the school year began. He knew that it wasn't easy for her, even though she tried not to show it openly to anyone. She wasn't too happy to talk about it now but if it helped to keep Kurt's mind off his dad, she would go for it.

Her hand reached to her nightstand where she kept a picture of Jesse and her from the last year prom. It was one taken by Andrea during the dance. They had no idea anyone was taking any pictures; Rachel and Jesse were on the dance floor, swaying slowly to the melody with their eyes locked on each other's face.

"It depends," Rachel replied with a small smile playing on her lips. "There are days that I hate New York and Julliard for being so far away. Especially when I see my friends making plans together or hear the girls from my team describing their dates. Even Justin – he's my male lead this year – he thinks he's so smart, sneaking around with our teammate, Bri, while they couldn't be more obvious. In those moments I just wish that Jesse was in Akron to do all this stuff with me."

Rachel put the picture back on its place and opened her mouth again.

"But then," she continued. "To be honest, it's not like me and Jesse has never been apart in the past. We were living in different cities, went to different school and had different responsibilities. We would meet quite regularly but there were also times when we weren't able to see each other for weeks because of our busy schedules. If you think about it, it's pretty much the same when he's in New York. We talk to each other every day, tell about each other's days, and it's as good as it can be."

"I admire you," Kurt sighed. "Seriously. I don't think I would be able to pull it off if it was me and Blaine."

She smiled to herself, ready to assure him that he and Blaine were so in love with each other that any time spent apart wouldn't hurt their relationship, when she heard a knock at her door and Shelby's opened the door, telling her that the dinner was ready.

"Go," Kurt told her without hesitation, obviously realising that she needed to go. "I want to see Carole giving a piece of her thought to Finn for that bread."

Rachel giggled.

"I want a full report the first thing in the morning."

Here I am with the newest [and slightly delayed due to the Easter break] chapter!

I hope you enjoyed it and if you have - you know what to do (but if you don't I'll give you a hint: it starts with a 'R' and makes my day every time I see one) ^^

-s.