A/N: There's really no excuse the for basic abandonment of this story. All I can say is that I am truly sorry for it. I am deeply thankful for the people that have commented, and followed and favorited this story along the way, and throughout the lapse in updating. I hope that this is sufficient for you, and as a return to finish this story and draw you back into it. With that being said...
Alex apprehensively approached the new drop location. Looking up at the numbers above the rickety wooden door, she tried to steady the pounding of her heart. She did a quick sweep at the gun tucked behind her back, under her shirt, and tightened her grip on the briefcase.
'This doesn't feel right. I'm not okay with this. I don't really have a choice, do I? It's two more drops after this. Two more and you're out. If you don't die or get arrested first. Thanks, self. Always the charmer.'
Alex exhaled and pushed open the door.
Taking stock of her surroundings, she started formulating a multitude of plans, both escape and otherwise in her head.
It was set up like a soup counter front. A few tables and stools around. One man behind the counter with his back facing her. Alex notices the faint outline of a gun tucked under his shirt. 'Not unusual, but not calming either.' There are swinging half-doors leading to a kitchen from what she can see. 'At least you'll see them coming.'
The man behind the counter turned around to face Alex. He stared almost as if he was trying to see right through her.
"I'm here to see a man about a Horse." Alex declared. 'I hate that fucking line. Fahri really needs to come up with a better line.''
The man cocked his head, sizing up Alex. Apparently, she wasn't what they were expecting. 'This could be a good thing, or a bad thing.'
"We were expecting a man. Alex."
"Sorry to disappoint." Alex put on her trademark smirk. "But I'm Alex. With this." As she holds up the briefcase.
The man glanced from Alex's face to the bag in her hand.
"Not here. In the back." As his thumb jerked in the direction of the kitchen.
'Fuckfuckfuck. I don't know what's fucking back there. At least out here I can see an escape. Maybe this is the day I join Sylvia Plath with her head in the oven. Fuck. He's looking at you, expecting you to follow. Put on the smile. Pay attention, Shithead.'
Alex's feet are already carrying her through the doors. She quickly glances side to side, noting specific locations of plausible weapons and possibilities of any sort of escape, if necessary.
She stops as she turns a corner and runs into wall with a solitary door. The man has been following her, and is effectively, directly behind her. So close that she can feel him exhale on her neck. 'Just how I wanted this to end, with a man breathing on me from behind. Couldn't you have made it a woman? Jesus, fuck.'
"Open the door." The man breaks the chatter happening in Alex's head.
As Alex pushes the door open, and looks into the room. There are two men sitting at a table, one bald, one with cropped curly dark hair. The lingering remnants of cigar smoke filling the room. The man from the front of the store closes the door roughly behind Alex. She attempts to keep the shiver running down her spine as unnoticeable as possible.
"Finally. You late." The bald man says with broken English. Alex picks up on a Slavic accent.
"Sorry. Traffic." Alex attempts her best at putting on the 'Vause Charm.' She notices that the curly-haired man is eyeing her up and down. Everything about this is putting her over the edge.
"You have package?." the bald man continues.
"Of course. As long as you have the money."
At this, the curly-haired man pulls a bag from underneath the table. Alex, as calmly as she can, walks towards the table, and drops her bag on it and reaches toward the bag presumably with the money.
The bald man interrupts the transaction, "Wait. I want to test."
'Fuck.' Alex retracts her hand. "If you have a problem with the product, that's a problem you can bring up with Fahri. I'm just the messenger." She attempts to keep her control of the situation.
"You will wait." The bald man takes a knife and cuts into the sealed brick. He fills just the tip of the knife with heroin. He quickly brings it up to his nose and snorts. 'There's never been any problem with the product. Ever. Never say never, Shithead.'
The man shakes his head from side to side, as if trying to get his focus back in order. "Is good." Alex lets out a sigh of relief.
"Tell Arab we will want more. Soon." The bald man stands. "You deliver. Beautiful woman, beautiful drugs." Both of the men laugh.
"I'll let Fahri know. Nice meeting you boys." Alex flashes a quick smile, grabs the money from the men and turns back to the door.
She walks out of the place, grip tight on the bag now slung across her back. The bag is weighing heavy on both her body and conscience. 'Just get a few more blocks. Then you can relax. Breathe. Walk. Breathe.'
Alex spotted an alleyway that she darted into and leaned against the wall. Every fiber of her being just wanted to scream and cry and rid itself of the crushing fear that was looming over her every action know. 'You are in public. Get back to the hotel. Call Fahri. Move on to the next drop. One more. Keep it moving.' Alex struggled with getting her body to obey the mantra that was repeating in her head.
The rest of the trip back to the hotel, Alex switched between fidgeting with her glasses and moving her fingers over the Hamsa necklace. 'Well, so far, so good with this protection. Let's hope it keeps up.' Alex texted Fahri from the burner phone that everything went moderately okay. She's got the money, they'll want more. The usual response.
Once she was finally through the threshold of the door to her hotel room, she dropped the bag on the floor; not caring where it landed. She removed the gun that had become stuck to her back with the sweat of both the stressful situation and the Myanmar heat, and finally collapsed into a chair and leaned her head against the wall.
"FUCK!" Alex's screamed filled the empty room. "How the FUCK am I going to do this? I can't even walk down the street without freaking out now." There are a million things running through her mind. 'Piper. Packing. Piper. Travel plans to Turkey: The Last Drop.' She absentmindedly played with her phone in her hands. 'I should call Piper. No, I shouldn't worry her. Two of us don't need to be stressed. Jesus, I need a drink.'
Alex stood and walked to the bar, her body working mechanically. 'Glass. Ice. Whiskey. Drink.'
Just as Alex was going to return to her seat, there was a knock at the door. 'Who the fuck?' Panic rose with a taste of bile in her mouth. She placed her drink down and walked back to the gun, cocking it and putting it behind her back. Another knock.
She approached the door, slowly, leaning in to look through the peephole. It was Jay. 'What the fuck is he doing here? What if Kubra sent him? Shitshitshit.'
"Alex, are you there? It's Jay. C'mon it's hot as whore in church out here."
Alex uncocked and placed the gun to it's original spot between her pants and back, then unlocked the door. Jay looked at her questioningly. "Alex, you look like shit. What ghost crawled up your ass?"
"No ghost, just stressed out. I still have to pack for the last drop."
"Getting old, Doll." Jay walked by Alex and sat in the chair previously occupied by Alex.
"Look who's talking." Alex smiled and tried to keep the conversation light, hoping Jay's humor would relax her a bit. "You want a drink?" she asked, returning to her own that was waiting for her on the bar.
"Sure. Whatever you're having is fine." Alex brought over his glass and took the chair opposite from Jay.
"Shame about Fox, eh?"
"I really liked the kid. He was a bit excessive, but really great. Almost as good as Maya and I picking up the girls."
"Fucking great to look at too." Jay laughed.
"I'll have to take your word for that." Alex joined in the laughter. "I can appreciate the male form, but it doesn't do jack shit for me."
"Well, as long as we're being honest, I've never seen anything hotter than you and Blondie." Jay turned to face Alex. "I'm serious, Alex. I know I was crude the other night when I said she would've been great to turn out as a mule. But I've never seen you give anyone the attention that you give her. Faking it with the mules, or otherwise. I don't know how you kept it going for so long with the work that we have to do. There was something real there though, Alex.. I hope it's not really over between you two."
Alex looked away from Jay and down at her glass. She contemplated telling everything to Jay, but it pained her too much to even think about Piper now. Plus, it wouldn't have been a smart idea to tell all her secrets to her rival. Even though she considered him a friend, in this business, you can't trust anyone.
"You have no idea, Jay." She downed the entire glass. 'Fuck this is making me miss Piper even more. Soon, babe. Soon I'll be home. And out. And alive, I hope.'
"Want another?" Jay asked. Alex thrusted her glass in his hand.
"Absolutely."
"So, since we're talking beaus, how's Marco?"
"Oh you know. Flavor of the week and all that. He's nice for now. Until I find somebody better."
Alex laughed. "I remember those days. It's nice...for awhile. Then -"
"Then you get old, Doll." Jay interjected as he handed her fresh drink back. Alex immediately put it between her lips. She was starting to feel the first one already, she should slow down, but her mind just said, 'Fuck it.'
"No. Then you realize that you're still lonely even with a body next to you. Because there's no connection. There's just sex. Lust. It passes just as quickly as it comes. Night after night, you're left with the same longing. For something more. So you find somebody different, and you're hoping it'll be different. You'll find that spark and they'll stay. They will keep you satisfied. They will keep you safe. And happy. You'll want to take them to places that you love so they'll love them too. You want to see what they love so you can love it too. You want to have special moments, and places and secret jokes. You want them to constantly be thinking of you and you of them. You want to convey all your feelings with a look. And you keep trying to find that person. One by one they let you down. And you're still left with you. The workaholic, the perfectionist, the pragmatist. The heartless."
Alex pauses and takes a sip from her drink.
"That was Piper to me. She was my somebody. She was my heart. And this is fucking killing me."
"Jesus, Alex." Jay sipped his drink. "Why are you still here?"
Alex moved her glasses on top of her head. She was beginning to get a headache and the room was slightly spinning. 'The drink couldn't be hitting me this fast. Gotta be the stress. Maybe the heat." She rubbed between her eyes to stave off the pain.
"Because Piper's not here. This is where I belong. I just don't fit into her world right now." Alex could feel the prickling of tears start. 'Not here. Not here. Not in front of Jay.'
Now the room was really spinning and her vision was blurring fast. 'This is definitely not right.' The glass tumbled from her hands and smashed on the wood floor.
"Alex, Doll, are you okay?"
"Not really, Jay. I'm feeling like I should lay down." Alex replied as best as she possibly could.
"Yeah you should, Doll. Lemme help you."
Jay slung one of Alex's arms over his head and helped balance her to the bed. The comfortable mattress sunk down with the dead weight of Alex. She was starting to drift to sleep. Jay leaned in closer to her face.
"Alex? Doll? Look, no hard feelings about this, yeah? You had to know this was coming. It's business Fahri told me everything. These are Kubra's orders. You're not dying, but I can't promise you that he'll let you live when you wake up."
Alex struggled to respond back. "You...fuck. If I live...I will...fucking...kill you...myself." Closing her eyes, she let the darkness finally take over.
Jay stood and walked to the door. With his fingers brushing the handle, Jay took one look back at Alex's limp body on the bed.
"I'm sure you will, Doll. I'm sure you will."