My apologies on the delay, everyone. I had been planning a longer chapter, and a slightly faster release for it... but then my grandfather and mother-in-law had strokes on the same goddamned day. While my grandfather is up and about, flirting with nurses while making fantastic strides in a walker, my mother-in-law has been a lot more serious. My momentum has been stalled a little thanks to this, but she seems to be over the hump right now.

Here's hoping things go a ton better!

Neon Genesis Evangelion: Yet Another Resplendent Gospel

Chapter 2: And on the Seventh Day, He Rested.

Slowly, Misato Katsuragi awoke to the world. It was a slow process, but the first thing Misato would later remember was a steady beeping. It echoed in the back of any dreams she had, making for a more surreal series of dreams than normal. Somehow, even dreams of flying turned into dreams of bomb disposal, or of having only a half-heart left in Legend of Zelda. There as also someone's voice, but she could barely make it out through the layer of sleep. Her eyes fluttered, and she winced as harsh light spilled into her vision. A deep groan came from her sore throat as Misato forced her eyes closed again. It felt like she'd been run over by a truck. And then they decided to go back over her in reverse.

"I'll talk to you later, Rei," the voice said, starting to sound more like a clear human voice, "Looks like our new pilot is awake."

Misato opened her eyes again, feeling less like she was awash in an ocean of light. In fact, she could feel soft but cheap sheets surrounding her, and a distinct sharp pain in her right arm as she tried to move it.

"Hospital, huh?" she mumbled, putting her right arm back where it was, "Feel like someone hit every square inch of me with a baseball bat."

There was a laugh from the voice. As Misato's vision began to clear and adjust to the light, she finally saw that it was Shinji Ikari. He was sitting in one of the uncomfortable chairs that could be found in one of the recovery rooms in any given hospital. He slid out of the chair and winced as he straightened his back, "Well, the Angel only self-destructed as its final act. You're lucky you and the Mark One came out in one piece." Bending over Misato, be put his hand over hers and smiled, "You were awesome, Misato."

Misato smiled back, feeling sleep claim her again.

"I'll be here," Shinji assured her as her eyes closed again, "Don't you worry about a thing."

In a dark room, buried deep within Terminal Dogma, Gendo Ikari stood alone. However, he was not unobserved. Surrounding him were twelve monolithic holograms, appearing to be made out of solid obsidian. Upon each monolith could be seen red bold text, declaring SEELE and SOUND ONLY, with a number of one through twelve associated with each one individually. Gendo stood at the center of the circle they made, a spotlight shining down upon his graying hair. His hands behind his back, Gendo simply stood at attention, listening to the words being directed at him.

"Ikari," boomed the monolith labeled 01, the voice belonging to what sounded like a wizened old man, "The results of the Mark-One's second deployment are… most satisfactory."

A voice behind monolith 03 scoffed, a Scottish accent thick in his voice, "Bah! The sheer cost of replacement limbs for the Mark-Zero, not to mention repairs for the Mark-One, would bankrupt most third-world nations. When we add in the cost of the repairs needed for Tokyo-3..."

"Silence!" shrieked 12, a shrill man who demanded respect rather than earned it, "One of the Messengers from the prophecy has been struck down. One step has been taken towards the completion of the Human Instrumentality Project's completion. There can be no comparison made with Earthly things."

"Indeed," agreed 04, a shuffling of papers could be heard from his monolith's speaker, "However, I must ask… why his daughter? It seems most peculiar that the daughter of Katsuragi could fight that which he summoned."

"Just fate pretending to be deep and meaningful," 11 spoke, sounding bored with the subject, "It's not in the prophecy, after all."

"Regardless," 01 continued on, "Your progress on the Human Instrumentality Project must continue. It remains our only hope in such desperate times." a pause, as the other monoliths began to switch off, "Thank you for your time, Ikari. The meeting will resume without you."

The last monolith vanished into the darkness, and the room resumed normal lighting. Gendo stretched his limbs and adjusted his glasses. Letting out a low sigh, Gendo turned around and began to leave the room.

"Desperate times may call for desperate measures," he spoke to no one but himself, "But mankind is not that desperate yet."

Back at the hospital, Shinji looked over some paperwork with a raised eyebrow. It was Misato's discharge paperwork, and everything seemed to be normal. Except for a few lines down at the bottom of her paperwork.

"What do you mean," Shinji re-read the line at the bottom of the medical document, "I'm her legal guardian?"

"Well..." the nurse fidgeted nervously under Ikari's questioning look, "NERV Headquarters called in the change of guardianship. The fax looked legitimate, so we simply proceeded to… change… it..."

"Something is dreadfully wrong," the younger Ikari muttered to himself, signing the final lines on the paperwork and handing it back to the nurse. He pulled his phone out of his uniform jacket and hit his father on speed dial, "And it has my father's fingerprints all over it."

"Hello, Shinji," came his father's incredibly bland voice, as if he was forcing a smile down, "What can I do for my favorite son today?"

"Only son," Shinji corrected, rolling his eyes, "and what do you mean I'm now Katsuragi's legal guardian?"

There was a long pause, and it took almost a minute. When Gendo spoke again, his voice was different, "You spend all of your time at work, or at home asleep, Shinji. You don't date, you don't have a private life… and I won't be getting any grandkids at this rate."

Shinji sputtered at the implication, trying his best not to rouse the sleeping Misato as he hissed, "Father, s-she's seventeen!"

There was a longer pause, "...I meant I could at least treat her like a granddaughter, now get your head out of the gutter." Shinji could tell his father was doing his best not to laugh, however, "She's living with you, and that's final. It'll be good for you, build character." Another pause, "Besides, PenPen could use the company."

"Fine," the younger Ikari sighed heavily, feeling there was no way escaping this argument, "But I'm keeping the car."

"Repairs come out of your paycheck, then." Gendo shot back, but feeling it was a fair compromise.

Shinji Ikari's newly-won Lamborghini Countach LP500S looked like it had seen better days. In fact, it probably had better past lives. While the car still ran, it was a decidedly more tamed affair than the roaring Supercar that had escorted Misato most of the way into NERV yesterday morning. Perhaps it had something to do with the fact that the red car of so many men's dreams was now driving with a front tire at a 20-degree angle, a shattered windshield, and two missing doors. Perhaps it was the fact that the motor sounded like a distressed party of kittens trying to swarm a bowl of milk, not the unleashed and untamed tigers that it once had been. Or maybe the fact that the steering wheel had just come off in Mister Ikari's hands. Or maybe it was all of the above.

Shinji Ikari sighed and let the steering wheel drop to the floorboards of what remained of his car. The wheel bounced, then rolled out of the car for several feet before falling pathetically to the ground. Thankfully, he'd just parked at his apartment complex, or else getting home would have been more interesting than the drive to NERV had been yesterday.

Unbuckling himself from the deathtrap his car had become, he smiled and waved an arm to the apartment complex in front of himself and Misato. With a flourish that the complex really didn't deserve, Shinji said, "Welcome to HINTERN."

"It looks like the ghetto moved out because of declining property values, Mister Ikari." was all Misato could say in return as she extricated herself from the former car. Misato wasn't wearing the casual clothing she'd arrived at Tokyo-3 in. Casual exposure to LCL tended to ruin clothes, and NERV instead had given her a borrowed beige NERV uniform skirt and white shirt.

Shinji winced. She wasn't wrong. While the apartment block was solidly built, it was completely unfinished on the right side. In fact, only Shinji's apartment was completely finished, leaving him the only person in the entire complex.

"Hey," he said defensively, crossing his arms over his chest as he began leading Misato to the sole finished apartment, "This was an abandoned project when I was hired on. It turns out they only finished one apartment in the entire block." he paused, frowning slightly, "I've been trying to convince Father to put more money into it, but the city's defense takes priority."

Misato rolled her eyes only the way a teenager could, "Whatever, Mister Shinji." Walking up the front steps behind him, she let out a soft puff of air, "Your dad is really weird, you know. Making me bunk with you."

"He's always been weird, Misato," Shinji corrected as he unlocked the apartment's front door, "I think it's his way of looking out for the both of us. Somehow."

Unceremoniously, the door to the apartment creeked open. A flick of the lightswitch revealed the inside. Misato had been expecting a run-down, miserable little one-bedroom hole in the wall with unfinished walls and floors. Or a missing wall. Instead…

"This is… really nice, Mister Shinji," Misato blinked in surprise, having stopped in the doorway behind Shinji. After a few seconds, her brain finally processed the reboot, and she stepped into her new home. "I was expecting..." she trailed off, looking around the apartment.

It was very plain. The walls were a default white, and the carpet a beige-ish gray. A simple three-person couch and small coffee table could be seen in front of a wall-mounted television. Kitchen was normal, and standard except for what looked like a massive freezer extension off to one side. All of the traditional sliding doors, though, were replaced by western ones, likely for budget reasons. But… strangely, that was it. There seemed to be almost no flair to the apartment at all. Aside from a very heavily used and well-loved cello leaning in the corner of the living space, it almost seemed like Shinji didn't even live here. The walls were bare, and devoid of even a family picture.

"...I somehow expected more." she finally finished, sounding flat and confused.

Shinji looked around, as if seeing his home again for the first time. He shrugged embarrassedly, "I kinda spend a lot of time at work..."

"Wark!"

Misato froze, looking around like she'd just heard an unearthly demon quacking in affirmation, "...what was that?"

"My roomate." Shinji replied, not bothering to look back at Misato's concerned face as he opened the fridge to see what was available.

Misato slowly snuck further into the apartment, ingoring Shinji's mumbling about what was available versus what would actually be edible. As Shinji grumbled about the overboard selection of ramen in the cupboards, Misato peeked her head around the fridge, which she was certain was the direction the WARK had come from.

"Roomate?" She asked, wondering what sort of human being could have created that noise… then saw it. And screamed.

The sun began to set over Tokyo-3, and mankind has survived to live another day. While the city still showed extensive damage from the Angel's assault, small pieces of the city began to show reconstruction efforts. In fact, those buildings that had only fallen over had actually been dragged back up into an upright position, thanks in one case to a grumpy Evangelion Unit-00. That was after Pilot Akagi had been bribed with the newest model MP3 player from Apple, but a few hundred dollars was worth avoiding paying for a new building.

The day was winding down, and the staff of Terminal Dogma were reviewing final reports before closing down for the night. Gendo Ikari himself had gone home earlier, citing wanting to avoid the traffic.

Kensuke Aida looked over the readouts he was receiving from his control panel. He let out a low whistle as he saw the general status report from the machine, "Wow. I was not expecting the defenses to be back up to 50% in one day."

"What do y'expect, Ken?" Toji Suzahara grinned as he ran a few tests on the recently-installed weapons buildings in the city, "Dat American company… what were dey called?" Toji pulled a business card out of his uniform's jacket pocket, "Damage Control. Right. Dose guys fixed up New York in a week and a half after dat last Kaiju attack."

"Didn't the Statue of Liberty got beheaded?" Hikari Hokari raised an eyebrow, turning to look at Toji, "How the heck did they fix that?"

Toji shrugged, "Damned if I know. Da city had to pay a pretty penny to fix it, though."

Kensuke adjusted his glasses, the glass going bright white as they caught a reflecting from his computer, "And with nigh-infinite funds from the UN, we've got a few to spend."

"Damn straight."

Pen-Pen looked up at the ecstatic teenager squealing in front of him. Humans. Whatever. The three foot tall penguin simply shrugged its flippers as it tried to waddle past Misato and see what his servant was working on in the kitchen. He let out a squak of surprise as the purple-haired one grabbed him and pulled him into a gigantic hug, rubbing his head.

Ok. Maybe this human wasn't bad.

"Oh my god, Mister Shinji," Misato squealed as she held the Penguin as tight as possible, "How the hell do you have a Penguin here? How old is he? What does he eat? How did this happen?"

Shinji laughed heartily, looking around the corner at the sight and grinned. He ducked back into the kitchen, but replied, "NERV tried to have a mascot about three years ago for the public marketing, and Pen-Pen was chosen to represent us. It… didn't really work, and I took him in." he paused as the fridge closed, "I don't know how old he is, and he eats about whatever he wants."

Misato squeezed Pen-Pen harder and let out a girly giggle, "I'm going to never stop loving you, little guy. You are just so cute."

"Wark."

A loud bong noise caught Misato's attention. Reluctantly pulling away from her new best friend forever, Misato saw Shinji picking up a large frying pan off the floor. Where he placed the pan on the stove, there were some ingredients she couldn't place. Leaving PenPen to satisfy her curiosity, Misato slid over to the fridge and peeked around the side.

"So," she asked, seeing the small bowl of already-made mashed potatoes, platter of ground meat, and a few other small ingredients, "...what is for dinner, exactly?"

As he dumped all of the meat into a large bowl and began mixing in an egg, onion, bread crumbs, and spices Misato couldn't place, Shinji let out an embarrassed cough as he muttered "Frikadeller."

"...bless you?" confusion was etched onto Misato's face as she raised an eyebrow.

Speaking with more confidence, but a faint air of embarrassment still evident, Shinji continued, "Frikadeller. It's basically fried meat dumplings, and the mashed potatoes go great with it."

"I didn't see you for an exotic food fan," Misato watched him mix up the meat, making it into small patties and tossing them into a pan filled with melted butter.

Mister Ikari laughed softly, pitching the last frikadeller into the pan and washing his hands after, "Well, I spent some of my time after the Second Impact War in Germany in University. Humboldt University of Berlin-2, actually." he grew wistful, looking off to the side as he began to fry the frikadeller in the now-heated butter, "NERV has a branch near there, and I was able to worm my way into the Berlin-2 branch without much trouble from Father."

"Wow..." Misato watched him prepare the frikadeller with an expert hand, flipping them with a single hand and catching them with the pan.

"I was there for a few years," Shinji continued as the frikadeller finally finished and he began scooping them onto a serving plate, "And I just got a taste for the food. It brings back some good memories," he paused, thinking about something for a moment, "And I don't think you can have too many of those these days."

"Wark!" PenPen agreed as he speared one of the frikadeller for himself with his flipper, waddling back to his freezer.

::Reader Feedback::

Max and first-Guest-guy, thanks for the kind reviews. I do understand your complaints on the level of profanity I had in the first chapter. I thought it was justified at the time, considering the situation that the NERV crew was in. However, it does seem a little excessive in retrospect. I won't go back and edit, but I will try and make it a lot more rare. You'll just have to wait to see how messed up the character dynamics get, though, Max.

Oddman, I put up "segments" or "previews" of next chapters on Spacebattles, where I slowly create all of the chapters for posting here. It's basically the same end result, though, and this chapter is as far as I've gotten. I'll try and trim the Claremont-level phonetic dialogue down, but I feel it's kinda part of Toji's character. Most of my time in EVA was spent with the manga, and the Viz translation went with a thick "Brooklyn" accent for Toji's dialect.

Second-guest-guy and Viper, I hope you liked this one!