"I can't move," Lindsay muttered, burying her face in the couch. "Remind me again why we decided to do all our Christmas shopping in one day."

"Because we are severely lacking in the time and planning department. Not to mention both of us kind of have a thing for chaos," Adam replied, looking over the shopping bags. It had been four hours straight of looking, sighing, complaining that nothing was right, sighing some more, and battling the throngs of people that had decided that they needed to shop too. They were tired, sore, and cranky, and completely tapped out of Christmas cheer and money.

"We had better start wrapping this stuff," he said with a sigh. "And we have to find boxes to send it in too."

"Okay, you be the pragmatic one while I take a nap."

"Not gonna fly Rudolph. If your nieces and nephews wake up on Christmas morning and have no presents from their favorite aunt in all the world, their spirits will be crushed, and they will never again believe in the joy of Christmas."

"Geez, how old were you when you asked Santa for the Weenie whistle?"

He just chuckled and shook his head, standing from the couch and going into the kitchen for scissors and tape.

"Want me to order pizza while I'm up?"

"Extra pepperoni," she hollered, moving down to the floor and sorting through the presents. Seven nephews and one niece did not a cheap Christmas make. She usually got them one big present each, but this year like last, there were shipping costs to consider. In the end she had gotten them all several small presents, which made Christmas day more exciting as there was more to open. The boys all got baseball cards and matchbox cars, rubber darts, and an assortment of candy. That had been enough, but then Adam had spotted the Ninja Turtle action figures. Reluctantly, she had added them to the list while he went on and on about which one was his favorite.

Her niece got some nicer things, mostly because she was often caught up in the scuffle of boys. Nail polish, clip on earrings, play make-up, a carefully wrapped precious moments figurine and a wardrobe of doll clothes. It was hard not to spoil Tessa, and she found herself walking away from a lot of things that she wanted to buy. No matter though. There was always her birthday and Easter and random Tuesdays.

"Man you really did get a lot of stuff today," Adam remarked, sitting down next to her.

"I have five times the amount of people to buy for."

"Yeah… you did get lazy and start getting Amazon gift cards though."

"Lazy and cranky and totally not creative. It will become a family joke and they will call me Amazon woman, but I don't even care."

"That's my girl," he said, sliding his arm around her shoulders and kissing her hair. "Of course, now my pile looks sad and puny."

"No it doesn't. It looks like you really thought about it. Those documentaries you got for your step-dad are perfect, Hannah is going to squeal while she rips stuff open, and your mom is going to read those books over and over and over again."

"You think so?"

"I know so. Besides, it's not really about the present. It's about the fact that you braved mall shoppers for four hours to get them."

"I think you've missed the point."

"Yeah, well I'm hungry. I'll make more sense once I've eaten."

They began to sort the presents into specific piles, making sure nothing crossed over and got shipped to the wrong state. They were quiet as they worked, enough cacophony still ringing in their ears from earlier in the day. It was nice to have slow silence.

"Will you stick that in Hannah's pile?" she asked, handing him a bright cardboard box. He turned it over and saw a large plastic horse, complete with saddle, feeding trough, and grooming tools. He recognized it as an appaloosa, and knew Hannah was going to flip when she saw it.

"Linds, you didn't have to…"

"I know. But I wanted to."

"It's her favorite."

"She told me. See, you're not the only one that files away important information."

He grinned and leaned over to kiss her.

"You're amazing, do you know that?"

"Thank you."

"We should turn on some music if we're going to get this done. What do you think, Jimmy Eat World or Dashboard Confessional?"

"Um… well… how about we listen to the Dashboard songs I know, then switch over to Jimmy?"

"You only know Vindicated and Hands Down, Linds. Don't you think it's time to learn more?"

"Nope."

"Well as long as you know what you want."

"I do. You, three square meals a day, and lots of vacation time."

"You got it, babe."

Christmas came two weeks later, rushing in with another snowfall and lots of wind chill. It seemed that days had all been dark, but it was comforting and cozy, creating excuses to cuddle up on the couch with apple cider or hot chocolate and waste the night away. The cold made them lazy just as the heat of summer made them listless, and it was a nice change from the stresses that a holiday could bring.

Christmas morning found them both at work quite early, when the blue of dawn had just touched the city. It was quiet around the lab, just a few people here and there, getting caught up on reports and other tasks while the heating system set the optimal temperature for comfort. It wasn't actually a bad way to spend the day, and there was enough to keep them busy that neither one of them really minded much.

They found each other at lunch time and took their wrapped presents to the back stairwell where they could have their own Christmas without being interrupted. She'd been thinking about his present since August and had finally found something last month. It wasn't a big deal, but she knew he would love it, and she was desperate to see him open it.

"Okay you go first."

"Ladies first," he countered, shaking his head.

"Ladies choice and I say you first."

He knew he wasn't going to with the argument, so he gave in, carefully tearing the wrapping paper on the slim package.

"Linds…"

"I found it in this hole in the wall shop a while ago. I wasn't even looking for it."

"Linds… this is an original record release of Enter the Wu-Tang, 36 Chambers from 1993."

"And it's signed."

"It is? Do you understand how rare this is?"

"By the look on your face I can guess."

"This is amazing. I have never had anything this cool before."

She smiled, glad the gift had garnered the reaction she was hoping for.

"So you like it?"

"I like it so much I'm afraid to touch it. Thanks Linds."

"You're welcome."

"Your turn now. But I have to preface this by saying that this is just a miniature version of the real thing. I didn't want to bring it all the way down here."

"Okay."

She slid her finger under the flap of wrapping paper, and was certain she was holding a picture frame. Further unwrapping confirmed her suspicions and she turned the frame over, gasping when she saw the picture inside.

It had been taken from her favorite spot on her parents property, the orange glow of the setting sun barely kissing the snow capped mountains. Miles of wheat stretched along the bottom of the picture, the barn just an afterthought in the corner of the frame. There wasn't much to it, but it was her favorite place in the world and it took her breath away.

"Adam… how did you…"

"I called your mom a while ago, after you told me about this spot. I wanted to see if she could get a picture, but she said you had taken some years ago for a photography class and… she found the negatives and I had them restored and enhanced and this is what came out."

"You mean I took this picture?"

"Yeah."

"And you called my mom and did all that…"

"Yeah. It got it printed out on canvas, twenty-four by thirty-six, which sounds huge and looks huge, but I think it will be perfect once we get it on the wall, and-"

She leaned over and wrapped her arms around him, fighting the tears of sentiment that were threatening to fall.

"It's perfect, Adam. Perfect."

"We done good, huh?"

"Oh yeah. It's going to be hard to top this next year."

"Never know, I might buy you a Corvette."

She chuckled as he pressed a kiss to her cheek.

"We should get back," he said finally. "We still on for tonight?"

"Absolutely. It's not really Christmas without a viewing of A Christmas Story is it?"

"Nope."

They stood up from their chairs and he hugged her again, a little tighter this time.

"Thanks for spending Christmas with me, Lindsay."

"I wouldn't be anywhere else."

Lindsay had been quiet for the better part of the evening, watching the movie, but letting her mind go somewhere else. Adam could tell she wasn't all there, but he had no idea where she had gone. He secured his arm around her and pulled her just a little closer, pressing a kiss to her ear.

"What's the matter?"

She shook her head against the couch and he could feel her retreating into herself. He had to stop it before she went too far, before she backtracked on all the trust they had already established.

"Talk to me, honey. What's going on?"

She sighed and closed her eyes, her fingers playing with his, trying to figure out how to say this.

"I'm going to have to go home soon."

"I know."

"I don't think I can do it. I don't think I can sit there and tell it all again. Not with him watching me. Not looking at his face and knowing… I just don't think I can."

"You can Linds. And you will. Because you have to. He might go away without your testimony. The evidence might speak, the cops might speak, but you are the only one who can tell exactly what happened. You are the only one who can put the jury in that diner. You're the only one, as horrible as it sounds, that can make them feel it. You have to do that, Linds. You have to do it for the girls and for their families and for yourself. It's going to hurt and its going to be hard, but you'll do it. You're not going to lose so much and then let him get away."

She sniffled and he reached up to wipe her tears away.

"What if I'm not strong enough?"

"I know you, Linds. You're strong enough. You wouldn't have been able to get through these last ten years if you weren't."

"I don't want him to break me."

"He won't babe. He won't."

She rolled over in his arms and buried her face in his shirt while he ran his fingers through her hair.

"I wish it was over," she whispered. "Sometimes I wish they had never found him so I wouldn't have to go through it all again. I wish he was just a monster in the shadows and I could pretend he was dead. But now… Adam, he's always going to be there."

"I know he is."

"He's always going to be in my head. He stole my security and I can't get it back."

"I know."

"I know you know. Your father did that to you too. I just don't know how to get over it."

"I don't think you ever really do. I think what happened to you, what happened to me, it's always going to be there. And we're both able to push it away and not let it control us, but for right now, this is at the forefront for you. Once this trial is over, the hurt is going to fade again. You'll be okay honey. You just have to get through this part."

"I know."

He reached down and tipped her chin up, looking her square in the eye.

"I am going to be right here to hold on to you as much as you need."

"Thank you."

As the clock struck twelve and another season of magic slipped gently by, they fell into the quiet, letting tranquility blanket them from the cold of reality, just for tonight.