Chapter 93:
He didn't tell them everything; there was too much to tell, and some of it he just knew they wouldn't handle…like the specifics of power plays and dislocated fingers…but he did fill them in a little bit.
Specifically; Dumbledore and the Horcruxes.
They had reacted with absolute horror and disgust, which while painful was - gratifying. It blessedly confirmed that they were not a Good Thing, and comforted him as it offered a balance to Tom's opinion that Horcruxes were brilliant and he really shouldn't have a problem with it.
Now, he felt like his concerns were actually valid, and that he wasn't just going insane fearing it.
He also told them why it had eventually caused him to lock himself up in Grimmauld Place…and the effects he thought it had on Ginny.
"That's-that's impossible," Ron shook his head, determinedly. "You're not going to hurt us. You wouldn't. You'd never hurt your friends."
"I wouldn't," Harry said quietly, "but Tom would…the Horcrux would. Ginny's…Ginny could already be susceptible to it…she's let one of them in before, got emotionally attached and dependent…"
"No-" Ron said stubbornly, "that can't happen, can it Hermione?"Hermione hesitated.
"Harry did save her," she said, cautiously, timidly. "A hero crush, a dependency and expectation that Harry will always protect her wouldn't be an uncommon reaction…Harry's like a modern day Prince to any girl. He's a hero, rich and famous and-"
"He is here,." Harry reminded under his breath.
"-but Harry doesn't even fancy girls!" Ron exclaimed.
"-Excuse me?" he demanded, loudly. They both turned to stare at him, and Ron's face went red as his mind caught up with what he'd just said. "I'm not gay! For crying out loud," Harry snapped.
Ron held out a placating hands.
"Okay! I mean it's fine if you are, but…"
"Even if you are, it wouldn't stop her feeling that way," Hermione said, with a briskness that made it clear she was trying to edge over the potential pot hole in the conversation.
"I'm not!" Harry repeated, indignantly, looking at her too. "Why does no one believe me?"
"Because of the way you act with Riddle," Ron mumbled. "No offence, but er, straight guys don't really touch each other so much. Or call each other couple nicknames like 'sweetheart' or 'darling'"
"But," Hermione interrupted hastily, catching his darkening, infuriated expression, "we believe you if you say you're not, don't we? Ron?"
"Right, yeah, course we do, mate," Ron said brightly. He was sure they bloody well did.
"Well, good. Cause I'm gonna kill whoever started that rumour," he said. There was an awkward silence. Hermione coughed.
"The point is…it is possible that It is what's causing Ginny to act so…out of character."
Ron swallowed, hard, Harry really hoped he wasn't going to start yelling or refuse to Harry anywhere near him.
"So, what can we do to fix it, then?" he asked.
Harry and Tom had been avoiding each other all day.
The art of one avoiding the other wasn't totally unusual, but that they were doing it at the same time was rarer. Whispers were already racing across the Slytherin table like wildfire when Harry spent meal times that day with the Gryffindors rather than the in his customary seat next to Tom.
What was even more unusual, and perhaps unheard of in history of the 'Slytherin Duo' was that they didn't seem to be doing it in the throws of an argument.
There was no subtle jabs or jibes, Tom didn't deliberately signal for Lestrange to take Harry's seat, instead leaving it empty and glaring at Cygnus when he shifted as if to try and take it.
It was…bizarre.
Zevi could only wonder what on earth had happened, and mentally bemoan that he missed witnessing it.
The other thing indicative that this wasn't like any argument they had before was that they still looked at each other - glancing over at the other's table every so often, yet always missing each other. Normally, if they were avoiding each other, they made a huge effort to NOT show any indication of interest, but now…it was bizarre.
He wasn't sure if he liked it or not, it broke the pattern, and that meant it was back to the beginning with the rest of the world scrambling to keep up and predict what was acceptable and how things were going to go.
He noted the Headmaster seemed gleeful at the seeming estrangement. It was a fascinating development, and whatever the cause was he could guess the outcome - something was going to give or shift in their dynamic, whether to carve the way for something deeper (and was that even possible?) or to split a chasm between them too wide to be breached.
Zevi sucked in a shaky breath, staring down at his braised beef in silence.
Watching. Always watching. And he knew the rest were too.
Harry looked up as the door to the Room of Requirement opened, and Tom entered. The Slytherin Heir stopped at the sight of him, staring with an unreadable expression.
"Harry," he greeted, quietly.
"Tom."
All of a sudden he felt nervous. Tom had physically lashed out at him last night, and it had hurt. He had bruises marring his skin below a Glamour that he knew had already caught the young Dark Lord's notice.
The dreams with Voldemort churned sickeningly into his head - the hours of torture by Tom's face. His fingers curled inwards, nails digging into the palms of his hand.
"I didn't expect you to come," Tom said.
Harry shrugged, uncomfortably, gaze flicking up again, riveted in deciphering any and all expressions that managed to find their way on the other's features.
"You punching me in the face doesn't really stop me from needing an Occlumency Teacher," he replied, carefully. Tom looked even paler than normal, and, almost hesitantly, began approaching him again.
Harry's muscles stiffened despite himself, and he knew Tom caught it by the too-fast flicker on his face.
"You're wearing a Glamour," Tom stated, voice somehow even softer than before. Harry flicked his wand wordlessly, revealing the bruises.
Tom's breath caught in his throat, jarred, and Harry felt a sick sense of triumph to combat his unease.
Tom was next to him a second, causing him to flinch back before he was aware of it, and Tom to freeze on the spot, before continuing his movements regardless, albeit slowly enough that Harry did have the option of preventing them.
Fingers tilted his head to the side, with only the barest of pressures and little force. Harry swallowed thickly.
"People would probably talk if I wandered around looking like this," he said, half in explanation, and half to fill the clogging silence.
Tom didn't respond to that, the pad of his thumb tracing across the mottled skin, gently, but it caused him to wince. The next moment Tom's wand was in his hand, and Harry had jerked his head out of the not particularly firm grip.
The Slytherin Heir hovered again in his movements, eyes dark.
"I was just going to heal it," he said.
"I know," Harry replied, and that caused Tom's gaze to shift away from the bruises to meet his gaze once more.
There was a supernova trapped in those violet eyes, exploding with emotions too fast and too intense for Harry to be able to feel comfortable studying them. Tom's wand lowered slightly, and Harry found the confusion in the movement easy enough to pick upon.
"Why won't you heal it?" Tom asked, tightly now. "It must be…painful. I thought you said you weren't a masochist."
"What's it to you if it painful to me or not? Is it bothering you?" he challenged.
"Yes," Tom admitted, without hesitation, and that caused Harry to start, with a solid lump in his throat. He smiled, without warmth, but not coldly either.
"Probably shouldn't have done it then," he said. "Are we going to do some actual Occlumency or not?"
"I'm offering to heal it now," Tom said, sounding frustrated, angry even, ignoring the latter part of his statement completely. "Why won't you let me?"
Harry stood from the sofa, putting them on a more equal height level, and pacing, a plan only half formed in his earlier 'gleefulness' of having 'touched a nerve' solidifying with every step.
Tom's eyes didn't leave him for an instant.
After a moment, he turned to face the Slytherin Heir again.
"I suppose that would make you feel better-"
"-It would," Tom agreed, quickly, as if he thought Harry was yielding to help, but Harry didn't step closer.
"-after all, if you can't see it you can probably just forget you ever lost control. I can see why that would make you feel better." Tom's eyes cut through to his bone, blazing.
"Harry-" he began.
"-Just because you erase a mistake, Tom, just because it's not visible or obvious, it doesn't mean you never made it. Just because you heal a bruise doesn't mean it never hurt."
There was a point to this, somewhere, and Harry softened his tone. He flicked his hair aside to reveal the lightning bolt scar.
"Just because you have good intentions that doesn't mean the scars you carve aren't permanent."
Tom stared at him, knowing full well that 'good intentions' referred to his claim that he would become Voldemort to make sure this all happened, that Harry existed.
"It's not that simple," he said.
"Why not?" Harry asked. Tom's jaw tightened, the supernova in his eyes turned black hole, drawing him until he was unable to look away.
"Because the only reason I would not be Voldemort as he is now, is the reason I would be," Tom replied quietly. Harry frowned.
"…I don't understand," he murmured.
Tom laughed, wildly, suddenly striding towards him, causing Harry to immediately start backing up in wariness, but Tom didn't hesitate this time, catching hold of his shoulders, just like yesterday, leaning forwards slightly so they're faces were level.
"Because," Tom explained, voice dangerous and yet not simultaneously. "The only person who can make me think that being Tom is worth more than being Voldemort is you."
Harry's eyes widened.
"T-"
"-I'm better around you," Tom hissed. "Only around you; sometimes I despise you for it and want to drive a knife through your stomach just to get rid of it and to hurt you." Harry swallowed as Tom's eyes flicked to the bruises and back, even as he continued, voice paradoxically softer to his words. "You…balance out my personality. I know you want me to let you cease existing and not become Voldemort…but…you're the only person I'm not already Voldemort to. Slight contradiction if you're not around for the next fifty years to stop me then, isn't it? Which, by the very nature of the problem, you can't be."
Harry's mouth felt dry.
"Whatever this is, Harry, it's not a simple choice."
The hands released his shoulders.
"So, what, you're just going to give up, lie down and accept your fate?" Harry demanded incredulously. "You're not going to even try and find another option?"
"I'm not going to waste the last year of true freedom I have left on a wild goose chase of knowledge, no," Tom said flatly. Harry's brows arched.
"You don't think there's a way to stop you becoming Voldemort?"
"I'm sure there are plenty of ways to stop me becoming Voldemort," Tom said evenly. "The problem is all of those involve this future and you going up in a puff of non-existence, and are therefore inadequate to my criteria."
"Well, I'm not giving up," Harry snapped, folding his arms. Tom inclined his head in acknowledgement.
"You never do."
There was a moment of silence, intense, and Harry broke it with a smirk.
"Of course not, that would involve agreeing with you about something..."
"Brat."
Later that night, much later, middle of the night and way past curfew later, Harry snuck up to Headmaster's office.
He didn't care if he woke Dumbledore up; this time was one of the only times he could conceivably visit now without raising questions that he didn't want to answer.
He was surprised to see the old man was still up and awake, and Dumbledore looked just as surprised to see him, before the expression was promptly schooled.
Fawkes flew over to his shoulder, chirping encouragingly into his ear as he entered further into the Headmaster's office, standing before the large, cluttered desk.
"Harry…" Dumbledore greeted, composedly enough, about to speak further when Harry cut in.
"I've got a deal for you, and I think it would be to the best of both of our interests if you accepted it."
A/N: So, not particularly long, but you know, stuff actually happens! Isn't that amazing? :O
Please review this chapter, I'm really nervous as to whether I got Tom and Harry right in this one...eek, cause it was, in my opinion, quite a big chapter for them.
By the way, you know the "are you human" login verification thingies...do any of you ever get the urge to just type "No, I'm actually a time lord, idiot." Or is that just me?
Thanks for the reviews! Mucho appreciation. Don't know when the next update will be, but not before at least Wednesday unless I get a sudden burst of free time.